Sadie conscripted Grace’s help in getting her ready for the event. She’d never been to a dance, and though she knew it was an event worthy of dressing up for, she wasn’t sure how to prepare herself. Though she initially protested Grace’s insistence on painting her face, Sadie eventually gave in, realizing her sister had much more experience when it came to romantic relationships.

Grace dabbed rouge liberally along Sadie’s cheekbones. “I’m so happy Wade is sweet on you,” she gushed. She used a cloth to smooth out the blush’s edges. “I never would have guessed you two would end up together.”

“We’re not together, and it’s not for sure that he’s sweet on me,” Sadie responded practically.

“Nonsense! Men don’t ask women they’re not sweet on to barn dances.”

Sadie struggled to keep her glee from showing. She suspected the same, but she was afraid to make any assumptions. “It’s hard to believe how far we’ve come, considering how much we quarreled as children. I suppose now we see how alike we are.”

Grace nodded as she finished applying kohl to Sadie’s eyelashes. “I agree, you two are alike. You both need to smile more and not worry so much. And you’re both just about the greatest people God ever put on this green earth.” Grace took hold of Sadie’s shoulders gently and turned her to face the mirror.

When Sadie saw herself, she could hardly believe how pretty she looked. The paint on her lips caused them to appear plump and full, and the color around her eyes made them sparkle. She twirled around in her green dress, excited and hopeful that Wade would find her beautiful.

Grace appeared beside her after prettying her own self up, and Sadie took in a sharp breath when she saw her sister in the mirror. It never failed to amaze her how gorgeous she was. Grace looked like a queen in her red satin dress and matching ribbons, which made Sadie look like a pauper beside her.

Wade entered the cabin at that moment. They both turned to look at him, and his eyebrows lifted with surprise when he saw Sadie.

“What have you got on your face?” he asked bluntly.

Sadie blushed and open her mouth to respond, but Grace answered first.

“It’s called makeup, Wade, and you might compliment her on it,” Grace scolded. “Doesn’t she look lovely?”

Wade didn’t remove his gaze from Sadie’s face as Grace spoke. It seemed clear he didn’t like how she looked in makeup, and Sadie wished she’d remained firm in her resolve not to allow Grace to paint her face, but Grace had been persuasive.

“She looks lovely without it,” Wade said finally, turning to look at Grace. “You both do.”

Grace laughed gaily and swept toward the door. “Come on, let’s go so I can leave you two lovebirds alone and find my own dance partner.”

Wade stepped toward Sadie and held out his bent arm to her. The fresh, masculine scent of him filled her senses as she hooked her hand in his elbow. His thick mop of hair was combed neatly and he’d shined up his boots.

“You look very dashing, Wade,” Sadie said with a shy smile.

His face relaxed. “And you look beautiful…” He seemed to want to say more, but instead his lips formed into a firm line. He led Sadie to the door, which Grace was already bounding out of.

The three of them climbed into the buggy that Wade had just hitched up.

“Do you know who you’re going to dance with, Gracie?” Wade asked, slapping the reins over the horse as he urged him toward the town.

“Yes, I think so,” she replied. “Either Jimmy or Thomas—depending on who is nicer to me.”

Wade snorted. “They’d both better be nice to you, or I’ll be having a word with them. And you must introduce Thomas to me if you choose to dance with him. I’ve not met him before.”

She rolled her eyes but didn’t look truly displeased. She agreed without argument to do as Wade requested.

“As for you,” Wade said, wrapping his free arm around Sadie’s shoulders. “I’m not going to let anyone else besides me dance with you tonight.”

“That’s fine,” Sadie said, attempting to sound nonchalant as her stomach fluttered with happiness, “if you feel like getting your toes stomped on for a few hours.”

He laughed good-naturedly and then lowered his voice into a sexy growl. “You don’t know how much pleasure it will be to teach you how to dance with me.”

“Sakes alive, are we almost there?” Grace groaned. “Giddy-up!” she shouted at the horse. His ears flicked back, but otherwise Grace’s order had no effect. He lumbered along at the same relaxed pace.

The fiddle playing in the barn could be heard as they approached, and when they walked inside, Sadie marveled at how bright with noise and laughter the space was. Two couples were circled by an audience who clapped and stomped along with the fiddle and cheered the dancers as they moved to the beat. Sadie watched the dancers intently, mesmerized by their skilled movements. She thought that if Wade expected her to learn how to move like that, he would be sorely disappointed.

As if reading her mind, Wade leaned down and whispered. “We’ll wait for a slower song to dance to.”

She shot him a grateful look and then returned to admiring the dancers. She realized she had gone to school with one of the women, and she guessed that the woman’s dancing partner must be her husband. It struck Sadie what a different life she had led compared to many of her schoolmates. They had mostly found husbands and were off making new families, whereas Sadie’s life had stayed the same.

The lively jig ended and a slow waltz began. Wade led Sadie to the middle of the dance floor and settled his warm hand on her back. “Count to three,” he explained. “Left foot first.” He was a patient teacher, and by the end of the song, Sadie felt comfortable enough taking Wade’s lead and repeating the simple steps.

He praised her and smiled at her in a way that made her heart beat a little faster. She couldn’t help but smile back at him. She knew nothing about romantic love, but she was sure she was falling in love with him—hopelessly and totally.

When the fiddle played a faster song, Wade moved Sadie away from the dance floor and headed toward the opposite side of the barn. She held onto his arm, enjoying how it felt to belong to someone and to be led instead of always making the decisions.

They came upon Grace flirting with Thomas, and she gave Sadie and Wade a dazzling smile as they approached. To Thomas, she said excitedly, “This is my brother and sister, and they’re courting each other!”

Thomas’s eyes widened with undisguised shock as his gaze darted back and forth between them.

“Oh, you don’t understand,” Grace said, noticing his expression and giggling. “None of us are actually related. We just lived together as kids.”

A look of relief passed over Thomas’s face as Wade held out his hand. “Nice to meet you. Do you intend to court Grace?”

“Wade!” Grace groaned.

Thomas grinned. “I would love to court her, sir, but she is always giving me the mitten.”

Wade narrowed his eyes. “What are you doing to make her rebuff you? Are you treating her as a gentleman should?”

“Oh, yes, sir,” Thomas insisted.

“He is,” Grace said, coming to his defense. “Don’t scare him away now, Wade. I might decide to court him after all.”

Thomas looked over at Grace in a way that could only be described as adoringly. “No one could scare me away from you, and I’m glad someone is watching out for you.”

Wade’s stern expression faded, and he offered them a smile. “You two have a nice time. Back to the house by ten o’clock, Gracie. Yeah?”

Grace’s face split into a smile even as she rolled her eyes. “Yes, Wade.”

To Sadie, all was right with the world in that moment. She was having such a good time that she was surprised when Wade seemed to indicate he wasn’t. After the next slow dance concluded, he leaned down and whispered in her ear, “Do you mind if we leave?”

The sun had only just set in the last hour, and Sadie had assumed they would stay out much later. She searched his face, wondering if he wasn’t feeling well. “No, of course I don’t mind. Let’s go now.”

Wade gathered her hand in his and led the way outside to the cool, quiet night air. He drew a deep breath and shot her a grateful smile. “Thank you. I can handle only so much noise and activity. I enjoy these kinds of lively events, but after some time, I crave the quiet.”

“Ah,” she said, relieved he wasn’t ill. “I remember that trait of yours.” She allowed him to help her up the steps to the buggy seat. “You were always going off by yourself, reading, doing your own thing. I envied you that.”

Wade climbed up beside her and clucked to the horse, beginning their short journey to the cabin. He didn’t speak for some time, and when he did his voice was stern. “That envy of yours is dangerous, Sadie.”

Sadie froze, alarmed by his tone and the shift in mood after such a carefree evening. “What do you mean?”

“You were jealous of the attention your pa paid to others, including to me. Are you jealous of the attention Grace receives now?”

“No!” she exclaimed, shocked by the question. It seemed to come from out of the blue.

His jaw clenched as he stared straight ahead at the path. “Then why the makeup? Why did you make an effort to attract the kind of attention she attracts?”

Sadie traced her fingertips over her cheek, remembering for the first time since the beginning of the evening that she was wearing makeup. Her face felt hot to the touch. “I don’t know. I suppose I wanted to look beautiful.” For you, she thought, though she didn’t say it out loud.

“You shouldn’t envy Grace’s looks. It could lead you to doing something you’ll regret.”

Sadie drew a sharp breath, feeling like she’d been punched in the stomach. “If you’re worried about me hurting Grace, I assure you I wouldn’t. I would never hurt Grace like I hurt you back then.”

He didn’t respond. Sadie held her posture stiffly, wishing they were already home, wishing she was anywhere but there beside Wade feeling exposed and judged. She had tried to look beautiful for him and he’d accused her of being jealous of her little sister. It was humiliating. Her looks would never compare to Grace’s, and she must appear very foolish to Wade if it seemed that she was trying emulate her.

They were silent the rest of the journey. Wade helped her down from the buggy without a word, and Sadie quickly retired to her room, making an excuse that she didn’t feel well. Luckily, both the twins and Ada were with friends that evening, so Sadie didn’t have to engage in conversation other than explaining her retreat to Wade. She feared saying two more words would cause her to burst into tears.

Once in her room, she wet a cloth and removed the paint and kohl from her face as much as possible. She stared at her bare, plain countenance in the mirror. The flicker of light from the lamp cast dancing shadows across her severe profile. She saw herself as Wade must see her—a bitter, unattractive woman.

She mentally kicked herself for being so naïve. How could she have thought Wade was sweet on her? When it came right down to it, he loved Grace far more than he loved her. He still saw Sadie as a jealous girl who would think nothing of hurting people.

She slipped out of her dress and drew her thin nightgown over her head. Lying on the bed, she sobbed noiselessly into a pillow, feeling like her heart might break in two. She wished Wade had never come back. He’d hurt her far more now than he ever had as a child. Worse, she had come to think he loved her enough to court her, when really he didn’t think much of her at all.

A knock at the door startled her. “It’s me, Sadie,” Wade said softly. “Can I come in? I’d like to talk to you.”

Sadie sat up and hugged the damp pillow to her chest. He was the last person in the world she wanted to see or talk to. Another unkind word from him might break her totally. “I’m tired,” she said. “Can we talk tomorrow?”

“I’m only asking for a few minutes,” he responded. “Please?”

Sadie wiped away the tears and took a calming breath. “Fine. I hope you’ll be quick.”

Wade walked in and turned up the flame of the lamp on her dresser to its highest setting. Upon seeing her tear-wrecked face, his own fell with dismay. “Oh, honey. I’m sorry.” He strode to the bed and attempted to put his arms around her, but she jumped back like a spooked horse and held out her hand.

“Don’t touch me!” she snarled.

Wade dropped his hands to his side. “You misunderstood what I was saying. I didn’t express myself right.”

“You expressed yourself perfectly,” she snapped. “You’re afraid I’ll hurt Grace because I’m a mean-spirited, ugly woman who is jealous of everyone. Isn’t that the long and short of it?”

“No!”

She squeezed her eyes shut as she felt her lower lip quivering. She hated herself for appearing weak and affected by how he viewed her.

“Sadie…” he said softly. When she opened her eyes, he was studying her with concern.

“Don’t pity me,” she growled. “Go away and leave me alone. I can’t stand you. I’ve never been able to stand you, Wade, and I regret that I forgot that briefly.”

“You don’t mean that,” he said, shaking his head. “You’re lashing out because I hurt your feelings. That’s what you do, instead of saying how you feel.”

“Yeah? Well, if I’m so horrible, why did you pretend to like me?”

He sat on the edge of the bed. Sadie scooted farther away until her back was against the wall. She pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. She eyed him warily, ready to flee if he tried to hug her again.

“I more than like you, Sadie. I love you. That’s the only reason I warned you about keeping an eye on your jealousy. It’ll hurt you more than anyone else if you act on it. Think about how much pain you caused yourself when you framed me for theft.”

Her nose burned, and fresh tears flooded her eyes. As much as she wanted to believe his concern was for her, she couldn’t. “You love Grace. You said it to protect Grace from me.”

“No, I said it to protect you,” he insisted again.

Sadie shook her head. “Regardless, your worry is for nothing. I want what’s best for Grace. I love her and I’ve done everything I can to take care of her since you left. I’m not jealous of her.”

Wade studied her. “All right, honey. I know you love her, and I’m sorry if I misunderstood your reason for wearing makeup.”

Tears stung her eyes. “You said you love me. But even if that’s true, you love Grace more than me,” she accused. She pursed her lips together and clenched her hands into fists, wishing to punch him in his earnest, handsome face.

Wade raised an eyebrow. “Can you not hear yourself? You just said you weren’t jealous of Grace, but now you’re acting jealous that I care about her. Are you jealous or aren’t you?”

“I’m glad you care about her,” she said hotly. “But I…” She wrestled internally about admitting her next words, but then decided she didn’t have anything to lose but her pride, which was already effectively ruined. “I want you to care about me more than you care about her. For once, I want someone to favor me.”

Something flashed in Wade’s eyes, and he let out a low growl as he leaned forward and took hold of Sadie’s arms. “You’ve learned nothing since you were a child,” he scolded.

She squealed as he hauled her over to him and planted her face down over his lap. “Accckkkkk! What are you doing, Wade?” This was not at all what she’d expected him to do, thinking he would instead answer her question about his feelings for her compared to Grace.

He shoved up her nightgown and tugged down her drawers, landing an immediate hard swat in the center of her bared bottom. “What does it look like I’m doing?”

She twisted furiously. “Let me go this instant!”

His grip around her waist tightened. “Not a chance. You’re getting the hiding of your life, so you might as well accept it.” His palm connected smartly with her cheeks over and over.

“Why?” she wailed. “I didn’t do anything wrong. You’re the one who was unkind!” she cried, scissoring and kicking her legs in the air. This spanking already felt much more punishing than the last one. There was no caressing—only no-nonsense smacks and scolding.

“I wasn’t unkind,” he responded, landing his hand relentlessly on her poor exposed bottom. “I spoke out of concern for you. Granted, I could have expressed myself better. But you lashed out like a petulant child, and you proved yourself to be jealous just as I suspected.”

His hand lowered to her thighs, which caused her to screech like a banshee. Her cries had no effect on his punishing hand, which continued to strike its target with unwavering focus. “More importantly, you need this spanking,” he said, smacking her impossibly harder and faster. “You need it to feel loved.”

“I feel loved, I feel loved!” she promised.

He paused. “Do you?”

She looked back to find his hand poised above her bottom to strike again. She nodded enthusiastically and gazed into his eyes with what she hoped was a truthful expression. She would have agreed to anything to halt the punishment.

His eyes narrowed, considering her response until he shook his head. “I’m not convinced. In fact, I think you’re lying. You don’t understand at all how much I care about you.” He brought his hand down in a terrific wallop that made her yelp loudly.

He repeated the motion, igniting the burn on her buttocks to something that felt unbearable. “You’re acting like you’re twelve years old again, still jealous of attention given to others not directed at you. You’re jealous that I care about Grace.”

As much as she hated to admit it, he was right, and every spank seemed to enforce his words. She’d been jealous of the attention her pa had given to the other children. She’d felt forgotten and left behind, and she was convinced it would happen again.

She twisted in his lap, trying to avoid his paddle-like hand, but he kept her pinned in place by leaning his forearm down her back. “You’re going to feel every last swat, Sadie.” He stopped spanking only to readjust her over his legs. “Stick your naughty bottom in the air. Arch your back and lie still.”

She whimpered and obeyed, the sound of his voice compelling her to do as he commanded.

“That’s it,” he said, landing his hand again on her upturned cheeks. “Keep your bottom in place to take punishment like you deserve. By the time I’m done with you, you’re going to realize how pointless your jealousy is.”

The spanking resumed, and he wasn’t going easy on her. Though every firm swat caused a burst of pain, she was aware of the moisture gathering between her legs. She couldn’t help it. The sound of his voice scolding her, the feeling of his hand striking her flesh, the loud slapping sound accompanied by her whimpers and cries—the spanking was such an intense experience that her excitement matched her distress.

He must have spanked her a hundred more times before he stopped and rubbed a hand over her poor tender cheeks. Her bottom felt swollen to twice its normal size, and she doubted she’d be able to sit comfortably for days. She slumped over his knee, exhausted and sore.

“Is it over?” she asked in a pathetic plea.

His hand soothed her hot skin in circular motions. “Yes. How do you feel?” he asked, his voice kind and without the stern edge that had accompanied it earlier.

“I feel like my bottom hurts,” she whimpered.

“Mmm,” he murmured. “Good. That’s what you deserve. You’re going to get that anytime you doubt how much I care for you.”

She sniffled. “I care about you too, Wade. I wore makeup because I wanted to look nice for you.”

His hand stilled. “Aw, honey,” he sighed. “I’m sorry I misunderstood. Really. And you did look nice. I always think you look beautiful.”

She shook her head. “I’m plain. I’ve never been beautiful. You don’t have to flatter me.”

“Goddammit.” Wade brought his hand down in a crisp swat. “I’m not flattering you. In my opinion, you’re very pleasing to look at.”

She struggled to see how he could find her beautiful. Still, she believed he meant what he said, which made her feel very happy. She remembered when he’d complimented her over by the buggy the day after he arrived in Lebec. She’d thought he was making fun of her, but now she realized he was being genuine.

“Wade?” she asked in a small voice. “I have to know, do you love Grace more than you love me?” She braced herself for his response and for a potential resuming of the spanking.

He continued to rub her punished bottom. “That’s an unfair question, Sadie, and one I don’t know how to answer. Can you answer it? Do you love Grace more than you love me?”

The reversal of the question surprised her, and she realized she couldn’t answer it either. “I see your point,” she said quietly.

“Good. The point is that I love you differently, so I treat you differently. I suppose I expect more from you than I do Grace. I see you as my partner and Grace as someone I must guide. But I’d lay down my life for either of you.”

A niggling of truth nudged her mind. She couldn’t quite make sense of it until Wade pulled her upright and cuddled her against him. When it dawned on her, she stared at him. “You just made me realize something.”

“What, honey?”

“Pa treated me differently than the rest of you. I thought it was because he didn’t love me as much…” Her voice trailed off.

Wade nodded and offered her a small smile. “Now you realize he didn’t love you less, he loved you differently and expected more from you than he did the rest of us.”

“Yes,” she said in a hushed voice. It made perfect sense to her then.

Wade stared past Sadie, looking pensive.

Sadie touched his cheek. “What?”

His gaze softened when he looked into her eyes. He took hold of her wrist and kissed the palm of her hand. “Pa wasn’t perfect, was he?”

Sadie blinked, surprised by his words. Wade had always revered Clyde. She couldn’t once remember him acknowledging a fault of his.

“He paid me for my work,” Wade said, “and I know why. He knew I was a boy who needed to feel like a man. He was very wise.”

“Yes,” she agreed. “He was.”

“But not perfect,” Wade repeated. “If he were, he would have believed me when I told him I didn’t steal from him. He should have believed me.” His eyes grew sadder.

She sighed deeply, saddened by his pain. “I wish more than anything I would have confessed to him. I wish he would have learned the truth before he died.”

“I do too, Sadie, but it’s all right. He never learned the truth, but he forgave me.”

She blinked, and two tears streamed down her face. “He would have forgiven me if I’d confessed. And he would have seen me for who I really was.”

Wade laid a hand on her back in a comforting manner, waiting for her to continue.

“I was still a child,” she said, sniffling. “A child who made mistakes. I needed him to see me that way, not as a grown-up.”

Sad understanding washed over his face. “Yes, you did need that, sweetheart. I’m so sorry you didn’t get what you needed back then.”

She nodded. “He made a big mistake not believing you and never suspecting me.”

“Yep, loused it up to shit.”

Sadie gasped and then burst out laughing. The mood of the room changed from sad to accepting. He joined her in laughing and pulled her close to him. “I promise I’ll always see that you aren’t perfect and that you need love and discipline, Sadie Shaw.” The words were spoken in a teasing manner, but she didn’t miss the depth of his promise. He knew exactly what she needed—to feel loved and accepted, flaws and all.

“And I promise always to believe you,” she said, squeezing him tight. “You’re the furthest thing from a thief that exists. You take nothing, only give.”