Cate
I took a couple of deep breaths as I headed for Aleks, who was staring at me in a way I couldn’t decipher. This was either going to go very well or very, very badly. I was afraid it was the latter, given how he was looking at me.
“Thanks for being right on time, Cate,” Nat, dressed as an elf, came forward and took me by the arm. “It’s going to be OK,” she whispered.
“I’m so nervous.”
“I know. So is he. Be brave.” She squeezed my hand, and I squeezed it back, glad for the solidarity.
She let go of me and went to stand with her mom near the big camera. My heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest. But after talking with Nat for what seemed like forever, I understood what the problem was. And I felt horrible for my part in what had happened between us in the past.
That didn’t have to be my—our—future. I just had to let Aleks in on it. If he would listen. I walked up the steps.
“What do you want?”
“I made an appointment with Santa,” I said.
“You could have called,” Aleksandr said.
“Because you would have taken my call? No. You said you’d call me, and I haven’t heard a thing from you. So, I made my appointment with Santa, and I’d like to tell you what my wish is.”
“This isn’t fair, Cate,” he said quietly.
The tone of his voice was heartbreaking. I took a breath and carried on. “Will you listen before you decide what’s fair? If you still think that when I’m done, then I’ll leave, and I won’t bother you anymore.”
He sighed, and then said, “All right. I’ll listen.”
I came closer and sat on the large arm of the Santa throne, trying not to think about the last time we’d been in a chair like this together.
“A long time ago, I was dating this guy. And we had different dreams, and different plans. We ended up not being together, and that was something really sad for me. I felt like this guy was possibly the one. But we went our separate ways, and I got OK with it after a while.”
I crossed my legs and locked my fingers around one knee, still looking at Aleks. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but I had to get this out.
“When I came home after school, and all my other things, I ran into this guy again. And despite all the bad feelings I think we both had about the past, we got together again. It was amazing.” I dropped my head a little. “The most amazing couple of days of my life. I was so happy. Then I found out that all the things I’d been working for had come together to give me my dream job, and I was so excited to share it with this guy. I mean,” I looked up, making full eye contact, “This was my dream guy. And I wanted to share my dream job with him because I could see something I’d never seen before. A future where I could have everything I wanted. But the damn past got in the way again.” I sighed, and looked down, pulling up all my courage.
“The guy, I guess remembering the past, walked away, and shut me out. I couldn’t tell him I got a job with the Audubon Society right here in Bristol. He just walked away from me. I waited to hear from him. I wanted to tell him about my job, and that my parents were planning to retire, and wanted to know if I wanted the house, because they want something smaller. After they learned I’d been offered the job, they were thrilled to think that the house might stay in the family.”
I stopped, trying to gauge his mood. He was boring a hole into me with his gaze.
“So… what I want for Christmas, Santa, is a chance for me to see if this really is the dream guy. If he’s what I think he could be. If I have a chance to get the life I really, really want. Because even if my dream job hadn’t come through, I was going to do what I needed to make this chance work. Those couple of days showed me I had to try.” My voice broke at the last words and I looked down to avoid Aleks seeing me cry.
His arms came up and wrapped around me, pulling me onto his lap. “I am such an ass,” he said.
“You are. But you are my ass, if you want to be,” I tried to manage the hope that leapt into my chest, making my heart feel like it was about to burst.
“There’s no one’s ass I’d rather be,” he murmured, dropping a hand to squeeze mine and pulling me in for a kiss with the other.
I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him, ignoring the flash of the camera, and the cheer that went up from outside of the Village. When I came up for air, I saw that several my Calypso coworkers had come out and were cheering. Their support made me tear up even further.
“You really mean it?” Aleks asked. “You want to try? Even though I’m an ass?”
“Would I be making this scene if I didn’t really mean it?” I waved my hand around.
He laughed, the sound echoing around. Then he pulled me close. “I’m sorry,” he said.
“Well, you will just have to make it up to me,” I said, tapping his nose as I wiggled in way I felt would be most effective on his lap. “Along with my present.”
His brows pulled together. “What present?”
“My present for being on the Naughty list. You’ve forgotten already? You’re not that good of a Santa, even if you are the best looking one I’ve ever seen,” I said.
He kissed me again, and somehow, I knew that Santa would deliver my Christmas wish along with my Naughty Girl present.
Hopefully quickly.
I couldn’t wait.