A week had gone by since Harrison walked out of my office, but not out of my life. I had received a few texts from him. They were simple one-liners like, I’m here if you need to talk and I’m thinking about you. 

He was all I thought about. I missed him more than I ever thought possible, which got me thinking. Lots and lots of thinking. So much, I was ready to talk to Harrison, ready to quit running away from him, ready to face the truth.

But I wasn’t ready for what I heard on the way back to the office from lunch Thursday afternoon. There was a car chase that led to a hostage situation in an abandoned building a few miles away from where I was driving. The radio announcer was giving a play by play, and then he said the words I dreaded, “The SWAT team has arrived.” I prayed with all I had that Harrison wasn’t one of them, but I called his phone and it went straight to voicemail. I didn’t know who else I could contact. I couldn’t just call the station and ask. I wasn’t his family. I wasn’t even his girlfriend, though I wanted to be more than anything.

How I got back to work, I don’t know. It was a blur of panic. I was lucky I wasn’t in another accident. But then it hit me. I had Officer Jackson’s card in my wallet. He had given it to me the day of the accident in case I had any questions. With shaky hands, I pulled out the small card and dialed. It rang twice before he answered, but it seemed like an eternity.

“Officer Jackson, this is Kallie Clemmons. I know I may not be someone you want to speak to, but can you please tell me if Harrison is at the scene of the hostage situation going on near Grove Avenue?”

All I could hear on his end was breathing for a moment. “You know that’s not really information we’re supposed to be giving out.”

“I know, but please.”

“He’s there.”

I wept over the phone. I didn’t know why I didn’t just hang up.

“Kallie, I know he would want me to tell you to trust him. He’ll be okay. He won’t let anything get in the way of the future he plans to have with you.”

“We both know there are no sure promises in this situation.”

“Keep faith. That’s all we can do.”

I hung up the phone. “Be safe,” I whispered to no one but myself.

I ran into the office and headed straight for Grady’s suite, which was decked out and included a TV. I wanted to see if the news was reporting the situation. And sure enough, they were. Helicopters and police cars were swarming the abandoned building.

Grady put his arm around my shoulder as the news captivated me. I felt like I wanted to vomit. “What if something happens to him?”

“You can’t think like that.” He rubbed my arm.

By this time, Mason had joined us. Grady filled him in on my life.

All afternoon, we sat on Grady’s couch, glued to the screen. Both rocks in my life held my hands and tried to speak words of comfort, but I wouldn’t feel better until I knew Harrison was safe and back in my arms. I couldn’t think about his words, or a future with him until this was all over. The news would flash back and forth to other stories. Each time I became increasingly irritated. I didn’t care that there wasn’t anything new to report. They knew there was one hostage and no shots had been fired. Their hostage negotiator was on the scene. I desperately wanted a peaceful end.

“I’ll bring in some food, darlin’,” Mason offered around dinner time.

“I can’t eat anything. Grady, you should go home to Hank and Alison.”

“They understand that I need to be here with you.”

I had the best men in my life. And women. Grandma couldn’t be left out. She joined our vigil in Grady’s office.

I kept hoping the aerial footage would show Harrison so I would know he was all right, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen. It’s not like I could tell who was who in all their ballistic gear. Around six in the evening, the situation took a drastic turn. Shots were fired and an explosive device was hurled out of the building. Several officers began to move on the ground and chaos ensued. I held my breath. They switched back to the newsroom where they were getting updates from the scene. They reported that there were officers injured. No names, obviously, had been released.

My senses numbed. I silently prayed it wasn’t him. My grandparents and Grady all reached for me, but they knew better than to say it wasn’t him. It seemed like an eternity more that we kept watching and waiting. An hour later, the situation was resolved. The shooter was dead and the hostage was saved, but still no word about the injured officers.

That was, until my phone rang. “Kallie, this is Officer Jackson.” I dropped the phone.

~*~

With Harrison’s family out of town, Officer Jackson made special arrangements for me to be allowed in his hospital room. He must have told the hospital staff that we were engaged. One of the nurses referred to me as his fiancée. It was a title I wouldn’t mind. His brothers and sisters in blue waited outside his door. The surgeon said he would fully recover from the flesh wound in his arm, but everyone was anxious to see for themselves.

I held his hand, waiting patiently for him to wake up. I could tell he was trying. He was agitated. I kept staring at his bandaged arm and thinking about us. Thinking about last week in my office when he said he loved me. When he cared about me enough to walk away. It all spoke volumes to me. It made me wonder if I was in love with him. I hadn’t ever given myself permission to be in love with him, or any man for that matter. I had let other things get in the way of that. Including fear. But now I feared something even more.

Harrison’s eyes fluttered open. He smiled and his eyes closed again.

“Hey there.” I rubbed his hand.

“Please tell me I’m not dreaming.”

I stood up, leaned over, and kissed his lips. “Is that real enough for you?”

“If it is a dream, I don’t want to wake up from it.”

I sat back down and took his hand. “This is no dream.”

He opened his eyes, a little longer this time. “You are my dream.”

Tears welled up in my eyes. “I’m so happy you’re okay.”

He expended all his energy and pulled my hand toward his lips where he kissed it gently. “I love you, Kallie.”

“I had a feeling. What are we going to do about that?”

He closed his tired eyes. “I have a plan.”

“I can’t wait to hear it, but for now, you need to rest.”

He nodded and drifted back to sleep with a smile on his face.

I stayed with him through the night, curled up on a chair watching him. I wished I could curl up next to him, I could use the comfort of his arms. Nurses were in and out. He fidgeted throughout the night, but didn’t wake up until the early dawn of day. I had fallen asleep with my head on his bed.

He stroked my hair. “You’re still here.”

My head popped up. “I hope you don’t mind.” I smiled. I’m sure I was a sight.

He tried to sit up. He groaned at the attempt.

“Let me raise your bed.”

“There’s a thought, counselor.”

I pushed the controls on his bed so he was upright.

“Come sit by me.” He grinned.

He didn’t need to ask me twice. I kicked off my shoes and crawled into bed with him. He put his uninjured left arm around me, with IV and all attached. I snuggled against him. “This is probably against the rules.”

“No one will blame me for asking a beautiful woman to join me in bed.”

“Nice. By the way, I’m pretty sure they think I’m your fiancée, in case anyone asks.”

“I accept.”

I gently smacked his hard chest. “I’m not that easy.”

He kissed my head. “Don’t worry, my plan is long term.”

I snuggled closer.

“I’ll resign from the force.”

I sighed heavily while outlining circles on his chest with my finger.

“That bothers you.”

“I love that you would. And most of me wants you to, the selfish part of me.”

“You are the least selfish person I know, even if you do belong to a country club.”

I laughed softly. “Harrison.”

“Yeah?”

“While I watched you through the night and thought about this last week apart, I reprimanded myself for all the time I wasted separated from you. We could have been together these past five years, but my fear prevented it. But now more than anything I don’t want to be without you, even if our time together is short. Any time together would be worth it. The only tragedy would be if we didn’t try.”

He rubbed my back. “We’ll figure it out together.”

“Promise?”

“This isn’t a hit and run kind of love.”

“I wouldn’t mind running into you, though.”

He groaned. “Just wait until I get out of this hospital bed.”

I couldn’t wait.