Chapter One
Bernie
Bernie folded the dirty wet wipe into the poopy diaper and rolled it all up into a neat little package. She then tied it into a doggy-poop bag to mask the odor. The final step was to put it into the garbage, before wiping her hands down and buttoning the snaps on her son’s pajamas.
After three months of this, it had become old hat. Still, being able to successfully put her baby boy into a clean diaper without any incidents was a relief. Xavier smiled up at her, blowing spit bubbles while he waved his rattle around in the air. Bernie smiled back at him.
“That feels better doesn’t it, sweetie?”
She stood, moaning a little as her knees protested. Perhaps she had overdone it on the treadmill earlier in the day. It was just that she was trying to procrastinate as much as she could while Xavier was having his nap. It wasn’t easy to do a lot of work around the house when he was awake. Not that he demanded much attention. Bernie just liked to be able to hold him.
Still, she should have probably done something else while he napped. Like figuring out what she was going to do from here on out. Or perhaps taking a nap of her own, since she wasn’t getting much sleep at night anymore. Maybe make that cake she was meaning to bake for a few days now…
Actually, scratch the cake. With her willpower around food these days, she’d most likely eat it all in a couple of days. Better to fill up on more healthy things, like vegetables. Maybe carrot cake…
Bernie washed her hands thoroughly before returning to her son. The blanket under him was a little crumpled and she lifted him to smooth it out before putting him on his stomach and laying down beside him. His feet and head both went into the air before laying back down on the floor. He began chewing on his rattle and Bernie gently pet the soft, downy hair on his head.
She sighed. She needed to make a decision as to what she was going to do now. Three months. Xavier was getting old enough that she could go back to work. The only question was, where?
“What do you think we should do, huh? Go back to working on the dig with Esther and Kayla, or take this high school job? How well would you do out there digging up ancient artifacts, huh? Esther’s getting ready to turn the dig over to Kayla entirely, and me if I go back, so she can go do her underwater stuff. It’s a great opportunity. But the high school will be steadier, it’ll guarantee my income for years to come. Not to mention that I won’t start until the new year. That means another few months of just you and me and our new Mommy groups.”
Xavier lifted his head again, looking into her eyes. Once more Bernie had her breath taken away at the dark blue that stared at her. She knew that babies’ eyes changed color at this age, but the color was so similar to his father’s that, though she had spent nine months trying to forget him, she couldn’t. That was yet another reason why she was uncertain that she wanted to go back to the dig.
Tyler Freeman. It had been a passionate, steamy affair. He had just broken up with the woman he thought he was going to marry and she was looking for stress relief. It had been nothing, just sex.
Very, very steamy sex. Hot, in more ways than one.
Tyler was a dragon shifter and with his muscles and those dimples when he grinned at her… it was more than her body could take. But it was only her body, not her heart.
At least, she had thought so. Until he took off without a goodbye for the second time within a handful of days. She understood the first time. His brother, Shane, who funded the dig, was engaged in life-or-death battles to protect his mate, Kayla. He’d sent Tyler away to protect him, but Tyler had gotten himself involved in the fighting.
The second time, though? No explanation whatsoever. No reason, just him there one night and gone the next morning.
Bernie shivered slightly. If she went back to the dig, she’d have to see Shane nearly every day. And chances were that Tyler would show up from time to time as well, with his tattoos rippling over those rock-hard muscles. His eyes full of mischief. And after a full year since she had last seen him, how was she supposed to tell him that he had fathered her child now?
On the other hand, if she took the high school job, she knew she would be miserable. Throughout her pregnancy, she had gotten more support from her friends at the dig than she did from her family. To be separated from them at this point felt like she was jumping out of a plane without a parachute. But the money was better at the school… and she did need money, being a single mother.
“Mommy’s head just goes in circles doesn’t it, baby?” With another sigh, Bernie rolled to a sitting position. “Do you think Tyler would even glance at me now? I was what you would call curvy before I was pregnant. And you, little rascal, made all my bad habits worse. I can’t seem to drop the weight I gained when I was pregnant…”
Xavier’s feet tapped the ground and Bernie couldn’t stop herself from smiling. She picked him up and cradled him to her chest. Her weight didn’t matter, not when she had this beautiful, beautiful baby in her arms. It had been a difficult decision, deciding to keep him and make a go of it alone. And she was a well-educated woman with options and resources. Her savings, if carefully rationed, would be enough to get her through the next full year. They could make it to the New Year, no problem.
She couldn’t imagine how terrifying it would be to have nothing and be pregnant. Just a few years ago, she wouldn’t have been in a position to take care of a child. She wouldn’t have been able to keep her precious baby boy. How many other women, without her resources, found themselves with no choice but to give up a child they’d otherwise love with all their hearts? It broke her heart to think about.
“But we mustn’t think about that right now. Not when I have you to think about and take care of.”
She moved to the couch and sat in the corner. Xavier was propped in her arm into a sitting position and his head swiveled around this way and that, taking in everything that he could see. His chubby cheeks ballooned, then he started making grunting noises as his hands flapped up and down.
“Silly baby.” She kissed the top of his head. “Such a beautiful, silly baby. What do you see?” Bernie glanced in the direction he was looking. “Do you see the picture of Mommy’s university graduation? When you graduate university, there will be a picture of you over there, too. Unless you don’t want to go to university. You have to graduate high school, but if you want to take a trade or do something that doesn’t require university education then that’s what we’ll do.”
The doorbell rang, followed up immediately by a loud knocking. Bernie frowned as she set Xavier back on his blanket. She wasn’t expecting anybody… who could it be? She quickly moved to the door. Once she peered out, her breath caught in her throat and her heart dropped.
She opened the door. “Dad? What are you doing here?”
“Bernice! How lovely to see you.” Her father grinned at her. It was his patented toothy grin, the one that was meant to look suave and charming but that always made her stomach cramp. “You’re looking as lovely as ever. You look more like my side of the family than your mother’s, thank goodness. Your eyes are exactly like my mother’s. She was such a beauty when she was your age. Well, are you going to invite me in or not? I want to see this little grandson of mine that I’ve heard so much about.”
Bernie kept herself planted in the doorway, keeping her eyes narrowed. After all these years, having her father swan in like this was unexpected, but not unprecedented. He was always like this. She had no reason to believe that he was actually here because of Xavier. Whenever he showed up, it meant trouble. Whether he caused it, or was in it, it didn’t matter.
Now she just had to get him out of here without making him mad. After all these years, she wished she wasn’t still afraid of him, but the sad truth was that she was.
“The baby is sleeping,” she lied as Xavier made a loud gurgling noise. She didn’t even flinch, even though her father rose a brow at her. “You’re not welcome here, Dad. I thought I made that very plain the last time I saw you.”
“Bernie, honey, I’m your dad. You’re being unreasonable.”
“Who told you where I was living this time? Mom? Or are you stalking me?”
Her father frowned, brow furrowed. “Is that any way to speak to your father?”
His tone made her want to apologize, but she held her ground.
“I came to see your little boy and to offer my help in any way I can. Things aren’t going to be easy. Which is why I arranged a little help for you. Financially, I mean.”
“Help me?” Bernie laughed. “You can’t even remember that I hate being called Bernice. How the hell are you supposed to help me? Never mind, I don’t want to hear it.”
“Don’t be like that—”
“I will be like exactly how I’ll be.” Bernie put her hands on her hips. “If you wanted to help me, then maybe you should have been a father to us growing up, rather than chasing whatever skinny little pornstar you were obsessed with at the time. The only time you ever show up is when you want something. I’m not going to let you trick me into thinking I owe you this time. I owe you nothing. Now leave.”
Her father frowned heavily. He shook his head and let out a sigh as though he was actually disappointed. “I really didn’t want it to be this way, Bernie. I know that a new baby is expensive and I wanted to help you out. You’re a beautiful girl. There’s a lot of men who’d pay for a girl with your curves.”
Bernie’s jaw dropped. Was he suggesting that she become a prostitute? “I am perfectly fine with money.”
“Ah. I see. I guess I’ll just have to keep it all for myself, then.” A large black van pulled up into the street behind him. A chill ran down Bernie’s spine and she made to close the door, but her father threw himself against it, slamming it open. Bernie shoved at him and he grabbed her, pinning her arms to her sides. “I’ve gotten into a bit of trouble with a few people. I owe them a lot of money. This was the only way I could get out of it. It’ll just be this once, Bernie, I promise. You wouldn’t want me to die, would you?”
Bernie’s heart slammed into her ribs. She opened her mouth to scream, but a couple of men in ill-fitting suits were suddenly there. One of them tightened cuffs around her wrists while the other slapped a hand over her mouth. They dragged her back. Her eyes rolled with terror. Xavier, perhaps cold from the door being opened, perhaps sensing something was happening, started to cry.
One of the men frowned. “You didn’t mention there was a baby.”
“It won’t be any problem,” her father replied. “It’s my grandson, I’ll take care of it.”
One of the men rolled his eyes. “Say goodbye, girly. Men don’t like buying brides that already have baggage.”
What? She struggled the best she could, but it was useless. Xavier’s cries tore through her. The men were too strong for her to fight off. They dragged her down the driveway and shoved her into the black van. Her eyes rolled to the neighbors but all their windows were dark. Most of them were gone for the holidays. Xavier continued to cry and she wrenched her head free.
“Help me!” she screamed. “Someone, help me!”
The men slammed the van door shut. Inside were two more men. They ignored her as tears started to pour down her face.
“What do you think?” one of them grunted. “Should we put her on sale right away?”
On sale? “What are you going to do to me?”
“Yeah. Don’t want to risk holding onto this one for too long.” The man who spoke glanced at Bernie and shook his head. “Don’t worry, we don’t sample our product. If you’re a good girl, maybe we’ll get your kid and auction you off as a family set next time.”
Bernie’s mind swirled around itself. She couldn’t understand what was going on except two things: One, Xavier’s care was now in the hands of her father. Two, she was going to be sold. She couldn’t stop herself from breaking down into sobs.