Smiling across the dinner table at James, I ignore both of our fathers’ droning on about the merchant ships’ troubles at seas; not that I ever really pay much attention. James is dressed more formally than usual—the mix of white, black, and bright, royal blue standing out against his sun-kissed skin and pale eyes. His usually messy, dark blond hair has been tamed, the natural highlights showing off even more than usual. I feel his foot nudge mine under the table, and push back against his. I have to bite my lip to keep in laughter at the amused look on James’ face.
“Azula, are you listening to what Mr Burcham has said?” my father asks me, snapping my attention away from James.
“Sorry? What was that, Mr Burcham, I didn’t quite catch it?” I ask, smiling innocently. My father sighs, not buying it for an instant. I tune back out as James’ father starts talking again. I take a sip of the ridiculous wine they brought over, just to be polite. It tastes like bath salts, and I try not to gag as I swallow it.
“Azula,” my father prods again.
“Yes, Daddy?” I ask, turning back to face him again.
“Do you have anything to say about what Mr Burcham has kindly repeated for you?” he asks. I shrug.
“Not really,” I reply, taking another sip of the foul wine to escape more small talk. As much as I enjoy James’ company, his father is a total bore. He speaks about the same topics every time they come for dinner. Thankfully, I learnt to tune out the drivel years ago; James had too.
“Do you not find it the least bit concerning that…blah blah blah,” I tune him back out. What is there to possibly find more cornering than usual about the state of affairs. The seas run red with blood, and we hide in our homes at night. We’re terrified victims just waiting to slip up. I’m sick of it, I just want to live and do as I please. Better to enjoy a short life, than to loathe every minute of a long one. There is nothing interesting about our small island. I want to explore and see the world, but my father barely lets me out of the house. My chances of ever escaping Carysi are minimal at best.
Our closest neighbouring island, Smoke, is uninhabited, due to the volcanic activity that has wrecked all previous attempts at life there. The second closest is Eska, it’s the home to trade and bustling streets, or so James tells me. One day I will get to see it, I’ve promised myself. I won’t let James or my father stop me. Just because there are near constant raids on the sea bordering towns and ports, they think it’s no place for a woman to go. When I argue that women live in those towns, the response is always that they’re a different kind of woman. I barely resist huffing aloud at the thought.
“I’m feeling quite full; would you mind letting me be excused?” I ask, already standing. My father sighs again, scratching at the grey stubble on his face.
“Fine, sweetheart, but stay inside the manor; it’ll be dark soon.”
“Of course, I was just thinking of going to read in the library,” I reply, knowing full well he will never go in there to check. He never steps inside that room, saying it reminds him too much of my mother. I walk around the table and place a kiss on his cheek, before striding out the room, certain that James will quickly follow.
I wait at the end of the corridor, and sure enough, a few minutes later James exits the room. When he meets me at the edge, I slide my hands into his and draw him close. Leaning up, I place a quick kiss to his lips before pulling away and stepping back.
“Come on, I’ve got something fun planned,” I greet him.
“Fun? I should be terrified then, right?” he replies teasingly.
“When is being scared ever not fun?” I respond. Leading the way through the large building I call home, I head to the secret exit. Tucked away behind a large painting of the sea, the tunnel opens up to a small cove. It had once been used for smuggling, before the human pirates were all but wiped out anyway. Just inside the tunnel is a pair of my riding boots. I ditch my pretty white sandals, leaving them resting on a sheet of fabric I leave here just for that purpose. Hastily, I slide the boots on before continuing down into the darkness.
“It’s a bit late to be sneaking out, Zu,” James chides, though he follows me down the path anyway.
“I just want to go for a quick dip in the water, Jay,” I reply, trailing my fingers along the tunnel wall to make sure I don’t walk into anything in the dark. Not that I really need to, I know the route from memory by now, considering I sneak down here most days to take a dip in the sea. I try not to feel guilty about my secret, but I know that not even James would approve of me sneaking down here by myself. He thinks we only ever come down together, but it would be near impossible to wait to go only on the days that he’s here; I doubt I could stay away from the water that long.
“We won’t have long if we’re going to be inside by dark, Zu,” he warns.
“What if we aren’t inside by dark?” I ask, hiding my nerves behind a confident voice.
“Don’t be ridiculous, that’s way too dangerous,” he answers.
“Why is it? They haven’t bothered this island for so long. It’s been years since they raided here, and yet we all still hide away in our homes. How is this any different to us going into the sea during the day? We’re not supposed to do that either,” I reply challengingly, not slowing my pace as we walk through the dark.
“You know it’s different. We never go out too deep, and if something happened we could always get to shore. With the sun up, there’s nothing they could do once we reached the land,” he says.
“It will be fine; don’t be such a bore, James. I thought you were more interesting than your two brothers,” I reply, trying to hit the right nerves to get my way. James was easily far more captivating than his two older brothers. William and Archie were two of the most boring people I’d ever had the displeasure of meeting. They ranked up there with Mr Burcham himself. It was a wonder James had turned out as interesting as he had. I’d like to credit that to all the time he spent with me growing up, but he’d always been like a spark in my life.
“You know that I am far more entertaining than those two fools,” he mutters. I stop, and turn to face him as we reach the opening to the cove.
“Then prove it, James Burcham. What have we got to lose? Just this one time, let’s take a dip in the moonlight?” I offer, stepping close. “It could be romantic,” I add slyly.
“Fine, what’s the worst that could happen?” he says, giving into my demands as always. I smile and slide into his arms.
“This is going to be so much fun,” I whisper in his ear, as I tug off his blue jacket, letting it fall onto the sandy ground.
“That’s what you always say before getting me into trouble,” he replies wryly.
“And yet you keep following me,” I tease.
“I’ll follow you anywhere, Zu,” he replies sincerely. And I know he would, James has been in love with me for years after all.
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