Sitting here, waiting for the Elders to speak is driving me mad. I know I should be paying more attention but when they’re all bickering amongst themselves what am I supposed to do? I don’t want any part of their arguing when I have bigger things on my mind. If my ideas didn’t work at organizing the pack then I’ll try again. I’ll keep trying until I find the right way to help them. That’s what a queen does.
“Dani?” a throat clears, grabbing my attention. Looking over at Cam, he just smiles at me as if waiting for an answer.
“Huh?”
Nate laughs seeing that I was off in my own world. “He asked if you want to know how it went? You know when you left earlier?” he prompts, reminding me that I left rather abruptly.
“Oh yeah sure. How did it go? Any challenges?”
Nate exchanges a glance with Mitchell before answering, “Only one challenge. One of the females is fighting tonight to keep her place but other than that, it all went good. Pete, you did an amazing job. Everyone is out there talking with Lily then there is going to be a celebration to honor the Alpha Queen and her mate. So yeah, good job,” he grins.
As if the Elders know we’re happy about the outcome, they interrupt us making me wish they would just leave us alone. But no… I still have to listen to their admonishments.
And of course, Sonja is the one to start in on me, “What you did, was absolutely reckless! What gives you the right to shift in front of the pack and use your will like that? You aren’t queen yet,” she scolds.
Rolling my eyes, I wait for the next one to offer their opinion, not that I care. To be honest, if I was already queen, they’d all be gone by now. I don’t need them when my mates act as good, if not better, than them. Although, I do like Lance and Sammy. Jax, Sonja and Erick still haven’t made their motives clear so I can’t even begin to trust them. Hopefully, one day, I’d like to have them on my side, I just don’t care right now. Too much has happened to make me think about something as insignificant as grovelling to earn their favor.
Lance tries to smooth things over, “Look Dani, Sonja didn’t mean it that way. What she meant was, it wasn’t fair on you to shift like that. All the pack was terrified. Do you want to lead them in fear just as Luke did?”
Oh, hell no! I’ve had it with these subtle nudges in the way they want me to lead. I’ve had enough!
Slowly I rise from my seat, letting my wolf peek forward. “You are out of line. Time and time again you have told me what I can and can’t do. What do you think is going to happen to you after the trials if you keep pushing me like this?! I have lost my father, and now I’m being forced to go from pack to pack like an ambassador to sort issues that shouldn’t have been here if Luke ruled his people effectively.
“I am sick and tired of the hypocrisy of following in Luke’s footsteps when everything I have done, is barely reaching the scale of bad. You sit there, judging me for shifting, telling me I scared the pack when in reality, they respected us for our authority. Pete and I showed them that, as mates, we worked as a team to fix their problems. As far as I can tell, it’s only you that have a problem with how I’m handling things,” I fume. I’m so angry at this treatment. I thought at least Lance would be on our side but apparently not.
Jason steps up next to me, offering support as he glares at the Elders, “I don’t care that you think you have the right to boss Dani around until her coronation, but it stops here. You either help her or you back off. Stop with your little taunts and judgements and just help her be the best queen she can be.”
This moment has never made me prouder to have him as one of my mates. He’s not only stood up for me but he has made it clear that he is on my side, not theirs. I grab his hand, silently thanking him.
Sonja’s lips curl in a harsh sneer, “You think you can tell us what we can and can’t do? If we deem it necessary, we can remove you from power. We don’t need some brat, thinking she is better than the rest of us. With a flick of my fingers, I could destroy you.”
Oh no she didn’t! My wolf is fucking pissed! Her dominance seeps out, focusing on Sonja. I watch in satisfaction as she lets out a scream and crumbles to the floor. I walk over to her submissive form, ignoring the other Elders, trusting if they attempt anything, Jason has my back.
Sonja whimpers as I crouch down in front of her, fear in her eyes. I smirk, enjoying how weak she is. “You think you’re strong enough to get the pack to turn on me?” I laugh humorlessly. “You and the others have been supporting a homicidal king ruling them for the past twenty years without doing anything to stop him, even when he almost killed his own son. What do you think the packs will think, hearing you pushed the only true heir to the throne away because you wanted more power than you are worthy of? Even if you got rid of me Sonja, you would have to kill me before the pack stopped trying to get me and my mates back.”
I get back up, looking at Lance, Erick Sammy and Jax, “If you want me to do things differently, then discuss it with me, don’t demand it. I’m not a little puppet that will let you walk all over me to further your own agenda. Now, my mates and I are going to relax and enjoy the party before we leave tomorrow. Anyone have any objections?” I ask, a hint of power leaking from my voice.
None of them say anything so, I take it as my cue to leave. I’m not sticking around when there is a party to be enjoyed. My mates have walked through the door when a gruff voice calls my name. I turn back to see Erick has approached me, walking around Sonja’s body. He barely glances at her, “You’re right. I’m sorry that we attacked you like that. I guess sometimes we forget we have a new leader taking over the pack. Luke did a lot of shit among the packs so we are naturally afraid of any anger being used. We would hate for you to turn out like him.”
I watch him, contemplating before answering, “I get it, I really do but you all need to discuss with each other what is best for the packs, me leading them or me gone. If I’m not wanted, I won’t stay. I’ll leave you without a second care in the world. My dad was the only thing keeping me here and now he’s gone. My mates are trying to hold me together but there is only so much they can do before I snap. Think about it and tell me what you want before we leave tomorrow. I won’t continue the trials if you want me gone,” I tell him, turning on my heel and slamming the door shut behind me. I lean against it, taking in a deep breath as the tears threaten to overcome me.
For all my bravado, Dad’s death is tearing me apart inside. But I can’t show it. I need to be strong. I’m supposed to be queen, I can’t afford to be weak, even in front of my mates.
“Dani?” James’s voice startles me. I thought I was here alone, my mates having gone to join the party. I cough, clearing my throat and quickly wiping away the tear, before he sees it.
I plaster a smile on my face, “Hey James, what’s up?”
He stares at me a moment before pulling me in for a hug, “I know you feel you have to be strong but if somethings bothering you, you can tell me. I can be a good listener,” he offers as I breath in his scent.
It’s different to the guys. Theirs smell like a variety of things and when combined give me the overwhelming feeling of safety. James’s scent is so similar to my Dad’s that it makes me cling tighter.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asks, pulling me back to look down at me.
I shake my head, ashamed. “It’s just, I miss my dad. With everything that’s happened, it feels like more time has passed but it’s only been a few days. Everyone expects me to move on, go through the trials and be happy being queen. That’s it. It’s like now that the funeral is over, everyone has gone back to their perfect little lives. How can I do that? Pretend to go on like he never existed?”
He watches me confess everything that has gone through my mind, not an ounce of judgement in his eyes. Instead, I see only compassion.
Wrapping an arm around my shoulder, he leads me through the house, out the front door and into the celebration. “Stick with me. I have something I want to tell you,” he says as we walk among the pack members. They reach out, touching me, revered to be in my presence. It’s way too creepy having strangers touching me like this, but my wolf is basking in it. As if we are somehow bonding with the whole pack.
James and I pass my mates as they gather around Lily and a few of the newly appointed enforcers and Josh. He leaves me for a moment, going over and whispering something in Cam’s ear. He looks over at me and I offer a smile. After a second or two, he nods at James, giving him a slap on the back.
James makes his way back through the crowd as the wolves relax having the time of their lives. He leads me towards the edge of the forest, pulling two chairs with him. Once placed where he wants them, he gestures for me to take a seat and sits in the other, giving us a perfect vantage view of the party.
“I brought you back here because I want you to hear my story. I want you to understand you don’t have to forget your father.”
I’m a little shocked to say the least. Especially that Cam let him bring me back when I thought for sure once he knew I was upset, they’d all be swarming me, trying to make things better. I nod, allowing him to tell me his story. I’m actually very intrigued to know how he lived.
He stares off into the crowd before speaking, “Well, after my family died, I left the pack. I should have stayed behind but I couldn’t. I left my grandchildren to lead the pack and keep handing down the traditions that were cemented in our time.”
I watch as he gets lost in his words, mesmerized by the emotions playing on his face.
“I had already been a human all my life, so I knew how to live out in the world without the help of wolves. I moved from place to place for hundreds of years, just drifting when I was attacked by wolves. I thought for sure I was going to die before I could fulfil my last promise to my mate but that wasn’t meant to be. I awoke days later, unaware of where I was until an alpha came in and told me he was the leader of the rogue pack.
“John was a very kind man and took care of me until I was healed. I thought for sure he would kill me when I least expected it but not once did anyone from their pack offer me harm. One day, John approached me holding a tray of items, things I thought were useless, like candles, incense, a scarf, sticks from various trees, and a few other bits and pieces. He told me the pack could feel my pain and wanted to help me.”
He looks at me, “The rogue’s pack was different to our own. They showed great compassion for everyone around us. He gave me the tray of objects and told me to follow him. His whole pack met around a beautiful waterfall that flowed into a sparkling blue pool of water. It was absolutely magnificent. In all my years, I don’t think I had seen something so untainted in the human world.
“He went into a speech telling me that when we leave this life, we need to be cleansed of our pain and accept their loss. He took the candles, placing them around the pool, his Beta did the same with the incense. His wife, Vivienne, came forward tying the scarf around my eyes before leading me to the pool. Once I was waist deep, Vivienne left me, blindfolded in this pool with the pack surrounding me. John spoke again, telling me, until I have been cleansed, I won’t be able to leave.”
James takes a stuttered breath turning away from me, a shine of tears in his eyes, “I was in there for three weeks. I know now that the pool was made from your lines magical ability. I can’t tell you what I saw, only that the visions gave me peace. I’m telling you all this because I want you to go to the pool. Your mates will understand and I think you need it to heal your soul before something dark overtakes you. Maybe after we finish the visit to the packs, you might be willing?”
His story hits me on a level I thought I didn’t have. How can a pool cleanse my soul? It honestly sounds better than what’s happening to me now. I feel as if he already knows the path I’m going down or he wouldn’t have mentioned something dark overtaking me.
Since I got here, my wolf has been quicker to anger, and very easy to summon. At first, I assumed it was from not being able to shift but I know that’s not it. There’s something dark hanging over us, affecting us. This ‘Cleansing’ ritual that James is talking about has me very curious. Not only would I have expected the rogues to be cruel, I expected they would have killed him on sight, not helped him.
“I think, that once this is over, I would definitely like to see this pool. Will we have to contact the rogue pack or something before we are allowed to visit?” I ask, voicing my concern. I don’t want to be in a huge fight to get to the cleansing pool if it won’t help.
“I’m still on good terms with the pack, so I’m sure they won’t mind. Actually, I wanted to mention something else. I know you are doing your trials through each of your mates’ packs, but something for you to consider, maybe we should visit the rogue packs?
“They’ve been isolated for centuries for things their ancestors did. Maybe it’s time we bring them back?”
I smile at his request, not because I think it’s funny but because I was already thinking about approaching them for the exact same reason. I had thought about making them their own official pack, I was just hesitant how my mates would take the news. “I like you James. You think the same as me,” my voice squeaking on the last word.
He grins shaking his head, “Stop talking, Dani. I keep forgetting your voice still hasn’t fully healed. I’m sorry for that. We’ll talk about this another time. Sit back and enjoy the party. I’ll protect you,” he sighs, leaning back in his seat.
Relaxing, I look around at everyone having fun. A few people have shifted and are enjoying themselves. I can see Nate over by the little kids, playing hide and seek with them. The rest of my mates are among the pack, talking to various members laughing at jokes and enjoying their company. I want to join them, I just don’t feel it.
Too much is happening. The Elders are pushing their own agendas, my mates all want me but I’m not sure yet if I’m ready to go that extra step yet and I have so many packs to meet. I just hope they’re as easy as this one.