"Farewell. Thank you for comforting me. Hope your owner treasures you." I petted the wolf one last time before it stood. It took one more glance at me, howling once before dashing away.
I smiled, waving goodbye until I lost sight of the beautiful creature. My arm dropped back down to my side as feelings of loneliness and sadness settled within me. I slapped my tear stained cheeks, taking a steady breath to pump myself up.
"Alright, Crim! You're better than this. You've always bounced back from situations like this. Today won't be any different. You’re gonna go drink away your misery and sorrow. As for James..." I trailed off; his hurtful expression when I pulled my arm out of his grasp flickered in my mind.
I swallowed the lump in my throat, taking another deep inhale and letting the air slowly out. As for James...maybe it's time we go our separate ways. At least until I can truly be independent and don't always have my father meddling in my business. I care about James...but do I love him? Truly love him? Does he really love me?
I looked up to the sky filled with stars and sighed. My hands clenched into fists and I nodded my head in determination.
"Become independent. No more relying on my family and James. I'll find someone better. Someone who will show me what love is and who will stand their ground by my side. He'd defend me and protect me. Yes. I'll certainly find someone better. They'll even give me hot passionate sex! Better than James times TWO! Then I'll visit Hakua and get her approval of my new lover and maybe I can work on just talking more with Mom. Yes, that sounds like a solid plan," I announced to myself.
I started walking again, the cold breeze gusted by me which made my skin prickle with goosebumps. I zipped up my leather jacket and began to speed walk toward the bar I always went to. I seriously needed a drink. No, I needed a few of them to drown my agony and temporarily forget how shitty today had been.
Could have been worse. I could have been hit by a car or killed. Hah, my dad would love that. No more Crimson Arashi to bring down his reputation.
I paused mid-stride and looked over my shoulder, sensing someone was watching me. But my eyes scanned the brightly lit streets and saw no one. I frowned, but shrugged. I need to stop watching horror movies. Not good for my nerves.
I began to jog out of the residential area and into the main streets that were livelier now at eight in the evening.
Ten more minutes and I'll be drinking. Yes!
I took a final glance around me; the creepy feeling of being watched was long gone. Silly Crim. Just your imagination playing tricks on you.
I began to walk casually with my hands in my pockets, hoping tonight would end on a good note.
"Much better! I can't believe people try to say drinking is bad for you. How can it be bad when it makes you so relaxed and happy inside? May do a little damage to your liver here or there, but we have magic for that stuff. Well, I can't use magic, but you get my drift," I rambled to Jeff, the bartender who'd served me since I came in to celebrate my eighteenth birthday, which was the legal drinking age.
"I agree with you, but that's your last drink. I know when you're at your limit." Jeff winked, crossing his arms.
I giggled in response.
It was one in the morning and I was one of the last customers of the night. I considered Jeff more as an acquaintance than just a bartender, but he was a hell of a good listener.
The moment I strolled in and his bright gold eyes met mine, he knew I'd survived another family outing and needed to get wasted.
He had light blond short hair that was gelled down to tame his naturally spiky hair. He was 6'0” and wore his casual work outfit which had always been a black dress shirt and jeans.
He'd closed the bar early, claiming it was a slow night, but after knowing him for four years, I knew he'd done it on my behalf. Whenever I had a really shitty day, especially when it dealt with the family, he'd close the bar early and give me an hour or so for us to just talk.
He knew all about my family history, being a shifter himself and living near my family residence, but he didn't judge me based on the numerous rumors about me.
Jeff judged a person by their personality and actions. Not by gossip that was mostly false and fabricated by shifters who had nothing better to do than talk shit about others.
"Aww... Jeff, don't be mean. One more." I gave him my best smile and winked at him.
He laughed, shaking his head, but moved over to the rows of bottled alcohol.
"Shot or glass?"
"Shot. Why not? Give me an extra kick for the night," I hummed.
He poured me a shot of what looked to be tequila, getting a few lime wedges from the mini fridge below and walked back to where I sat on a bar stool.
He placed the shot and the small plate of limes, giving me his 'this is it' look.
"No more after this. Promise me."
"Fine. I promiseeeeeee." I emphasized the word.
He grinned, stepping back and allowing me a moment to enjoy the quick drink. I downed it with practiced ease, enjoying the burning tingle that trickled down my throat before I bit down on the lime.
"Is James going to meet you at the lamp post?" Jeff asked.
I pulled the lime out of my mouth and nodded. "Yup. He'll text me when he's almost here. Hopefully, he didn't forget about me," I joked, but Jeff frowned.
"He still treating you like a side chick rather than a girlfriend?" he said plainly.
"Pretty much. He says he'll start treating me better, like this is a real relationship every single time I bring it up, but it all turns into lies once he's in the public eye. Like today when we were heading to my family home, we held hands all the way until we turned onto the street that heads toward the shrine stair entrance and voila! He suddenly remembers he has to discuss something extremely important with his father and calls him," I explained.
"He needs two hands to hold a phone?" Jeff asked sarcastically, a displeased expression on his face.
"Apparently so." I rested my elbows on the smooth black counter and rested my head in my hands.
"You deserve better," Jeff whispered, grabbing one of the freshly washed glasses and began to dry it with a cloth.
"Do I? Even I'm unsure of it at this point in my life. I don't see why I'm even here. Sure, my paintings sell super well and I've established myself in an online community that loves me. But they don't really know who I am. They know me by a pseudonym and nothing more. I could vanish and my paintings would be the only positive memory of my existence. Yet, they wouldn't be identified as mine since I paint under a pseudonym. I can't go out in public and reveal my identity. My sales would crash and I'd likely end up homeless."
I stared blankly at the rows of alcohol displayed to Jeff's left while I continued to ramble.
"My mother cares about me, but doesn't have the courage to defy my father. He doesn't give two shits about me, and James...I don't think he'll ever really accept me as a lover. I'll always be the friends with benefits girl who he seeks out for companionship. I think I just stay because of the same reason, though. Someone to comfort me when I'm ill or sad. Someone to drink with or rant about my troubles to. I guess the sex is nice too." I giggled at the last part.
I lifted the empty shot glass, staring at the thick glass as I moved it up and down for no reason.
"If I let all the people who are negative out of my life, Jeff, I'd be left alone. I have no other friends or family who love me," I whispered.
“What about Hakua?" he reminded.
I laughed, ignoring the tear that rolled down my left cheek. "Hakua is now the instructor of sword dancing in a temple on the outskirts of Homatomashi, which is two and half hours journey and train service ends at ten in the morning, resuming at four in the evening and the last train is at six in the evening. All courtesy of my loving father who thinks the disciplined people up there deserve a sword dancing instructor who is worthy of training the best. She shouldn't be spending her time babying and being friends with little old me. After all, what would a human possibly do with sword dancing?” I explained, as my father's words echoed in my mind.
"What! When does she leave?" he demanded, looking pissed.
"She's gone, Jeff. The contract is already signed," I replied dully.
"But...Hakua cares dearly about your friendship. She would have told you or fought the decision," Jeff argued. He'd known Hakua even before I began coming here. I knew he’d had a tiny crush on her for the longest time and I bet he was rattled at the reality of Hakua being transferred against her will.
"No choice. I know how my father works and his emphasis on privacy. The contract would include a nondisclosure agreement and her training is the family business. Her refusal would spark my father's anger and he'd make sure she wouldn't be able to get employment anywhere else," I revealed.
"But, he's not that powerful. Sure he's a known legend and has done his share of helping out the country and Nokamato itself, but he's not the damn Emperor! He can't have all that power in his grasp," Jeff snarled.
"Unless the Emperor comes down here himself, and announces the new updated laws of leadership, my father and the rest of the Council will sit on their high thrones and continue to treat the people like shit," I vented.
"The Emperor is still ill. I bet he doesn't know what goes down here. The Council has put up a front that masks what really goes on in the dark alleys and the crime rate that continues to rise every day. I'm lucky this bar is in a quiet area and brings business. I've heard of the fights and murders that have been going on in other areas, as well as the multiple robberies and reports of stolen goods," Jeff huffed, setting the glass down and moving on to the next, cleaning it in a rougher manner.
"The Emperor has a son though. I wish he could come down here and see what’s going on."
"Moment he stepped foot on our lands, everyone would just fake it, acting like everything was okay under the Council. He wouldn’t know that the Council bribed or blackmailed everyone," Jeff argued.
I frowned, knowing that would be a tactic my father would use with no remorse. He'd done things like that multiple times to get to where he currently sat on the Council.
"It's such bullshit!" I declared.
"It's only a matter of time. We're already getting backlash from neighboring countries because of the death of Storm Yuna. Your father and the other Council members better watch their next moves because I wouldn't be surprised if the Emperor sends undercover investigators to scout out Nokamato. I heard a rumor that the Council is treating Storm's guards like shit," Jeff revealed.
"Her guards? Wait, you mean the ones who would watch her when she went out and stuff?"
"No, her personal guards, meaning her lovers. Not many people knew about their relationship, but you know us bartenders hear a lot from all the customers we deal with on the daily. One man who worked as a guard for Storm said that the guys had been summoned that night by the Council without Storm Yuna. She went with her normal security to get some fresh air and that's when she was murdered by a member of some criminal organization. They’re still tracking down the thief who took a valuable item with Yuna's magic and familiar locked inside it," Jeff clarified.
I needed a few moments to process the information. "How is her familiar trapped in the watch?" That hadn’t made any sense to me.
"It's not necessarily trapped. Storm Yuna comes from a strong family background of shamans and magic users. They use items to help host their magic because they have way too much. Storm's familiar is basically its own entity, but can shift into any animal it wants. Cat, dog, eagle, anything in animal form," Jeff explained.
I nodded, urging him to continue.
"Whatever was locked in the stolen watch must be extremely powerful, especially since it includes her essence. If it ends up in the wrong hands, they can use her powers, familiar, and any dark secrets that had lingered in her mind. The newspaper said an incident like this happened before and so they had a bunch of predictions of what could occur if that kind of stolen item gets into the wrong hands, but I didn't continue reading. It's all a bunch of fake stuff to pull you in." Jeff sighed, shaking his head in annoyance.
"But why would they treat her lovers poorly? Shouldn't the Council be providing them with the best treatment? I thought she came down on their behalf," I questioned.
"She did. The Council requested her aid for a month and she finally decided to come down to assist with a business deal and a few other magic related deals that needed to be finalized. Now that she's dead and the Council is receiving major backlash, I think they're taking their frustration out on her former lovers rather than dealing with it themselves," Jeff theorized.
"Wouldn't be surprised,” I sighed. My phone vibrated in my jeans pocket. I quickly took it out, squinting to see James' text.
DRUNKEN LOVER:
"I'll be at the lamp post in fifteen. I'm sorry about earlier. Will talk when we get home. <3 u."
I slid the phone back into my pocket, giving Jeff a sad smile. "Guess it's time for me to leave."
"Don't fall for his 'let's have makeup sex' methods. You have to draw the line, Crim," Jeff declared.
I nodded, sliding off the bar stool.
"I know, Jeff. I'll do my best. Thanks for always listening to me. I really appreciate it." I bowed my head in gratitude, pulling out a hundred dollar bill and placing it on the counter.
"Crim—" he began, but I shook my head.
"If I paid for a therapist it would be way more than that and they aren't allowed to give their clients alcohol. You'll just have to do both." I smiled, giving him a wink.
"I'll always make time for you, Crim, and if you need a friend outside of just this place, don't hesitate to call me up. You have my number, right?"
"Yup! You're my emergency contact if I need alcohol or to vent," I joked.
"Perfect." He chuckled and gave me a wide grin. "Be careful out there, Crim. It's not as safe as it used to be," he warned.
"I know. I'll be perfectly fine. I know martial arts and sword dancing helped with my agility. I can do some good damage even if I'm a mere human," I reassured him.
"Okay. See you next time and remember, if you need me I'm here," he reminded.
I nodded, waving goodbye and made my way out of the small bar. I waited till I heard him lock the door, wanting to make sure he would be safe inside and no one would try to jump him.
With the recent spike in criminal activity, he slept in a hidden room in the bar and left in the early morning when the streets were starting to become busy.
Right now, the streets were empty and I was the only one on this block. I unzipped my jacket and began to jog my way to the lamppost where I was supposed to meet James. It would take me about five minutes to get there at a leisurely jog and thanks to my last minute chit-chat with Jeff I would only be waiting two or three minutes for James to arrive.
He always tried to meet me on time, but this was the latest at night I’d been outside without his company.
I reached the lamp post right on time, but James hadn't arrived. After a few minutes, I began to wonder where he was. I pulled my phone out, quickly scanning the area as my fingers tapped away at the screen.
ME:
"Hey, I'm here at the lamp. Are you almost here? Yes, we’ll talk later."
I put my phone away and shoved my hands into the pockets of my leather jacket. I began walking around aimlessly, entering the one-way alleyway which was wide enough to fit at least three people horizontally.
I walked back and forth as the minutes continued to tick by, but still no sign of James.
ME:
"James? Where are you?"
Another five minutes passed. I bit my lip in frustration as I continued to pace back and forth. If I knew I would be stuck waiting for him, I could have called for a cab.
ME:
"James, if you're not here in five minutes, I'm heading home. It's cold and this area isn't safe. If you don't see me near the lamp post or alley, head home."
I slid my phone back into my pocket for the last time, trying to control the anger that was already wanting to lash out at someone. No wonder I don't have magic. I'd probably end up hurting everyone or everything with my short temper.
I heard footsteps behind me and I turned around to give James my piece of mind when someone knocked into me; both of us crashed to the wet ground. What the fuck!
I groaned, pushing the person off me and hurrying to my feet.
"Fucking bitch in my damn way!" a scruffy voice insulted.
I narrowed my eyes at him, but he was already off, dashing down the alley before I could even get a glimpse of his appearance.
His black cloak fluttered behind him, and I caught a glimpse of a weird symbol on the back of his right ankle, but then he reached the end of the alleyway, turning right and was out of sight.
Before I even had the chance to blink, I heard several more sets of footsteps coming closer. I stepped out of the way, pressing myself up against the wall to avoid the five men that appeared to be in hot pursuit.
I was ready to step back, but then another guy passed by me; his green eyes locked onto mine for what seemed like a millisecond as he ran past, cursing when he reached the end of the alley, looking left and right.
"RIGHT!" I called out to him.
He looked over his shoulder and gave me a cheeky smile.
"Thanks, Hottie!" he replied, turning right.
I blinked; my cheeks grew red at his comment. Well, that was different.
I was ready to turn away when a glint of silver caught my attention. I squinted my eyes, noticing something on the ground a few steps away from me.
I looked around, wondering if the guys would return. After a minute or so had passed, I took a step forward, followed by another. Within a few strides, I was in front of the item that laid on the cold, wet cement.
I frowned as I crouched down, reaching out to touch the face of what appeared to be a pocket watch. The intricately engraved design was beautiful and looked handcrafted to fit the owner's style.
I noticed the single pink jewel at the top; there were four other sockets that I assumed should have had some type of gem in them, but were empty. It was as if someone had removed them.
My finger brushed over the pink jewel, feeling a spark of magic and the jewel glowed softly at my touch. My eyes trailed along the circular design, trying to imagine what it would look like with the four stones that would surround the magic circle in the middle which featured a star, each point aligned with the gem sockets and the initials 'C.S.' in the center.
I didn't know what the initials stood for, but it must have meant something. Maybe if I found the owner, I could confirm their identity with the engraved lettering.
I flipped the watch over; the other side was a plain silver and I inspected the silver chain attached. It looked to be a necklace with mini charms on it, three on each side. Each charm was outlined in silver to help each item stand out.
A pink rose, a red car, a girl wearing a purple kimono, a turquoise cupcake, a rose gold key, and a gold crown.
The rose, car and tiny girl were on one side and the cupcake, key, and crown were on the other. I was taking a closer look when my finger accidentally pressed the button on the side.
The watch flipped open, displaying the clock face inside.
I stared at the clock face that had a black background— the numbers and clock hands glowed to life, showing the time as 2:30 A.M. Then a magic circle appeared.
Slowly in pink, the same five-point star that decorated the outside began to appear and five orbs of light formed at each point. I was ready to freak out but then I heard a set of footsteps.
"DON'T OPEN IT!"
I looked up at the desperate cry, seeing the same guy that had passed by earlier. His green eyes glittered under the lamp post at the other end of the alley. Those eyes widened, fear taking over and his body jolted forward into a sprint.
I watched as if in slow motion as he made his way toward me; the dark gloomy alleyway looked twice as long now.
I could see the desperation in his eyes. His orange-gold strands of hair were bound together by a black gold ribbon decorated with ancient text which began to glow— the sensation of magic in the air evident.
But it didn't matter. Something told me my fate had been set in stone and there was nothing I could do to change it.
My hand grew hot and my attention returned to the watch I cradled in my hand. My eyes widened as five magical creatures burst out of the opened pocket watch. My hand shook and the weight of the watch seemed to triple, making me whimper in fear.
I glanced back up to see the other five men come into view— all of them sprinting in slow motion to reach me.
My eyes looked up to stare at the five magical beings above me as they danced in celebration. Or were they somehow mocking me for setting them free? All I knew was that the power that pulsed off of them in waves was what made the goosebumps creep along my skin and made me tremble where I stood.
The magic that surrounded me was suffocating, and I struggled to breathe, frozen in crippling fear at the overflow of magical essence that could potentially kill me. The force of energy was stronger than that of my mother or father who were the most powerful shifters I'd ever known.
My eyes grew even wider and I watched as the creatures crashed into one another mid-air, creating a spinning wheel of color: red, white, blue, gold, and pink.
I watched in fascination as the spinning bundle of color shot forward, heading straight into my body.
It was as if the air had been punched out of me and the impact threw me off my feet, the force of magic surging through my body, and my legs and hands flailed uselessly as I fell.
I couldn't distinguish what was drawing my attention more — the unbearable pain that coursed through my veins or the stunned and fearful expressions of the men approaching me as I made my slow descent to the ground.
Instead of time returning to its normal speed, it seemed to slow down even further. Yet my thought process accelerated and I began to ponder what was going to happen. Was I going to die? What were those beings of light? Why is this happening to me? If I die, will I truly be forgotten?
Before I hit the wet pavement, I opened my eyes to stare at the six men. But something changed.
My fear didn't linger on the feeling of impending doom as the power I once feared thrummed through my veins, but focused instead on the fear of leaving these men — the ones I loved, again.
But I didn't know them. I'd never seen them until this very night. Why all of sudden did it feel like I'd known and loved them for years and that I was losing them...again.
As my consciousness wavered, flickers of emotions and memories flashed through my mind, before leaving just as quickly. Dark spots then filled my vision.
I finally hit the ground; my body bounced from the heavy impact and the energy my body struggled to contain. It felt like trying to close a container with too much fluid — the excess trying to forcefully escape.
My head hit the ground first, falling back till all I could see was an upside down image of the way I'd come from.
The one time I hadn't listened to James, it led to my death. A tear rolled down my cheek and I struggled to breathe through my nostrils — blood already began to pool within them and trail down my esophagus.
I should have waited for him. Or gone home. Why did I let my curiosity pull me in? I promised I would stay safe. But here I am, on the verge of death.
I wanted to gag or turn my head to the side to let the metallic tasting liquid have a way to escape, but I was nothing but a broken rag doll, immobile on the cold wet ground.
The last thing I saw was my best friend — those ruby red eyes that I'd loved and the soft, light pink lips I had kissed every time he craved my touch.
I thought if I died, I would at least have a sense of fulfillment for living a decent life. But as my eyes began to close, my best friend ran forward and I regretted not telling him how I truly felt. I wished I had told him how much I yearned for us to be a couple and not just a fling based on emotions and alcohol.
I loved him…yet, I also somehow loved the six men who were nothing but a group of strangers to me. Somehow, I knew they had loved and cherished me till my very last breaths.
Their love was different from James’. It felt real and it wasn't as one-sided as my relationship with James. The fear that filled their eyes a few moments ago, for a complete stranger like me, told me as much. But as I stared at James, I wasn't sure.
Did he really love me? Or would I always come second when his family was involved?
As my consciousness finally began to fade, my body began to fail one organ at a time. In that moment, I knew I had died before. I had lived, enjoyed the joys of love and fame, and had died a horrible death — a demise I hadn’t deserved.
As I took my final breath, my lungs unable to spare any more energy to function, I made a silent plea.
If I survived this, I would conquer my fears. I would live wholeheartedly and not be afraid to speak my mind and admit what troubled my heart.
I would enjoy each breath I took and strive toward achieving my dreams.
Most importantly, I would love without boundaries and follow my heart.
The last thing I heard was my name. A part of me remembered the way it rolled off James’ tongue whereas the new part of me didn't recognize the foreign voice.
"CRIMSON!!"
Crimson...or Storm.
Which one am I?
Does it matter?
I think not.
Because without some type of miracle, I will become nothing but a memory.
And that is my biggest regret of all.