JOSS

Vee bolts through the open door, and I follow, but I’m knocked back as her pain and fear project, and the energy created pulses into the hall. I lose my footing and steady myself on the table as if someone pushed me to one side with brute force.

Xander looks between me and the doorway, the photograph of Casey in his hand. "Don't leave Vee outside in the rain. See if she’s okay.”

I can't move. Vee’s energy projects again, and I suck in a breath unsure I can deal with the dizzying intensity.

"Joss?" asks Xander.

I shake my head unable to speak. Xander drops the image on the table and strides out the door, into the rain, while I attempt to persuade my weak legs that I have the strength to follow. Before I move, Xander reappears with Vee in his arms, her face buried into his chest as he cradles her against him. The energy in the room created by her reaction grows as he sets Vee on the sofa. She sinks back and stares into the space around not registering us.

Vee's wet hair hangs in a sheet around her face, where tears mingle with the water, clothes glued to her body by the rain.

Xander swears and runs both hands across his damp hair, before grabbing the woollen throw rug from the sofa arm and holding it out to her. "Vee. Dry yourself."

She doesn't move. This girl barely exists in the room, but her shock and fear fill the air around. Can Xander sense how bad this is?

"Help her," says Xander and gestures at Vee. "Do your thing."

I half laugh. "'My thing?' I'm struggling here, Xan. Vee’s feelings are intense, and I don't know what will happen to me if I touch her."

"Just help her," he repeats. "I'll salvage what I can from this mess, and we can leave. We need to go. Now."

Xander turns away and rips image after image from the wall. He turns to the smouldering files in the waste bins and yanks the half-singed papers out, swearing as flames hits his fingers.

I drag a palm down my face. What if I can't fix her? "Vee," I whisper as I sit beside her. She's immobile, and I dry her face with my sleeve. "Come here."

Placing my arms around Vee does nothing. She's stiff, unyielding, but this is worse than the night she discovered who she was, freaked out, and attacked me.

This Vee doesn't fight.

The anguish continues to flood into me, and I steel myself against the effect this could have. As the powerful emotions keep coming, I'm pushed to my limit. There's too much, too fast, and I can't absorb this all. I can't fix her.

"Vee," I repeat and stroke hair from her face, as I attempt to rouse her. But she's catatonic.

Xander continues shoving everything he can find into a plastic shopping bag, avoiding looking at us. "Is she okay?" he asks, not turning around.

"Sure, Xander. She's fucking brilliant."

Absorbing people's negative emotions always works. I always manage to convert them into energy that strengthens me.

This time, I'm too overwhelmed and weakened by Vee’s.

"Help Vee," I growl at Xander. "I can only try to ground her. Maybe you can break through to her. You and Vee are closer to each other than we are."

Xander turns to me. "What? No. You are. She likes you."

"Seriously, Xander? You had sex with Vee! That makes you bloody closer to her than me."

He opens his mouth to protest, but the words are useless. I know damn well what happened.

"Xander!" I repeat and point at the bag he grips in his hand. "She needs us. Put that shit down and let's get out of here."

"What if they're around? If whoever did this comes back?"

"I think they're long gone." I glance at the blood staining the rough beige carpet in the room’s corner. "Both of them."

"I think Seth did this," says Xander. "Not somebody else."

I shake my head, as if shaking away his words. "Seth? No. I don't think he's the type to murder, then drag bodies around the countryside in his car."

"You trust him too much, Joss. We need to find him."

"Obviously, but we need to help Vee first, for fuck's sake!" I gently lay her tensed figure back against the sofa and stand. I can't hold anymore; every second with her drains me. "I need a few minutes."

Leaving a speechless Xander, I stride out of the hall into the relentless rain, and the sheer amount of energy absorbed from Vee shakes through my body and switches to anger. I swear and smash my fist against the rough brick wall, and rest my head against it ignoring the pain from my grazed knuckles. My lungs hurt as harsh breaths rasp in and out, and I will myself not to lose control Xander-style.

I don't register the rain pouring onto me until enough overwhelming energy drains away and I can rationally face the situation again. Breathing more calmly, I walk back into the hall, filled with the stench of burnt paper, to find Xander beside Vee, holding her hand and staring up in lost confusion.

"What's happening?" he asks. "Why is she like this?"

I rub an arm across my damp hair. "Because we keep putting her into situations she can't deal with. Right from day one, you've expected Vee to cope with too much. She can't just flick from human to the Fifth like that." I click my fingers.

"Why not? It's what she was created for."

"You're such a cold-hearted bastard sometimes," I snap at him. "Look at her. Can't you see she's suffering?"

Xander stands and backs away from the sofa. "I can't deal with this." He grabs the nearby bag filled with his evidence and heads to the doorway. "Is the car unlocked? I'll drive."

If only Xander could allow himself to acknowledge she's more human than he thinks. However hard he tries to hide it, Xander's fear for Vee matches mine, and not only because Truth, his secret weapon, is malfunctioning. He cares as deeply and that’s messing with his reality.

But he doesn’t sense what I do. Her reaction to the girl's death this morning proves something I suspected. Vee can't disconnect from the person she was before we found her. She won't reach full strength until she loses more of her human side.

Logan's words worry me.

What will happen if Vee loses her humanity too?

* * *

XANDER

The rain splatters against the windscreen as I focus on driving, and on pushing away my thoughts, but the silence inside the car screws with my concentration. I can’t allow myself to connect to Vee's distress, because worrying about her interferes with the ability to focus on my role.

Which confuses the fuck out of me, because my duty to care for Vee is one huge part of that role.

The truth launches at me and I can’t stop the words forming in my mind.

I'm scared because I don't know how to help Vee.

Yesterday, I lost hold of the control I need to grip onto, and when the physical need unshackled, so did the desire for an emotional bond. I’d convinced myself that Vee connecting with each of us equally meant I could keep my heart and soul guarded. I could avoid giving my true self to Vee because I was just one of four. But now I know the truth—I can never deny how I feel about Vee, to myself or her. None of us can.

A powerful need for Vee triggered the first time we touched at Portia's and knocked everything sideways. The instant effect this stranger had on me changed up everything. In the moment, I saw a strength she could have over us all, and I told myself not to weaken and give in to my need for her. Now we've crossed that line, I can't step back. I wanted her out of my system, but now I crave Vee more than ever. After last night, the obsession intensified and nothing is satisfied.

I never expected Vee's strength or for her to step up to me. I never expected her to be my equal. Seeing part of myself in Vee is the problem. I can't cope with the idea she can be lost and hurt in this painful way—because that means I can be too.

I park the car outside the farmhouse and glance in the rear-view mirror. Joss has his arms wrapped around Vee, and she's slumped asleep on his shoulder, her arm across his chest. Relief pushes in that Joss managed to keep her calm. Maybe he can fix her too.

As expected, Heath and Ewan freak the hell out when Joss carries Vee upstairs to a bedroom. I hover around outside as Joss fusses over her, gentle and intuitive in a way I never can be.

"Someone needs to sit with her," he says. "Xander, you fill the others in on what happened back at the hall, and I'll stay here."

We crowd at the bedroom door, like nervous visitors at a hospital patient's bed. He's right. We need to shift into our roles, rather than be paralysed by the situation.

"Is she okay, Joss?" asks Heath, and he heads over to sit on the bed. Worry lines his face, as he looks down at Vee. Vee, the girl I know he loves as much as we all do but has an easier time showing her.

"Vee isn’t hurt," I say, as much to myself, but it comes across as a Xander annoyance.

"Sure, Xander," mutters Joss. He places a hand on her forehead and looks down.

"Is she okay?” Ewan asks.

"I think so. I'm not a freaking nurse though, am I?"

I chew my lip. "She needs out of those clothes."

Joss glances at me, and the others do the same. "She'll lose her shit if she wakes and we’re stripping her when she's barely conscious."

He's probably right. No, I know he’s right. "C’mon she asks us to treat her the same as we would each other. I've had the misfortune of stripping you guys in the past when necessary.”

Ewan voices the obvious answer. "Yeah, but Xander, she's still a chick."

"We don’t need to take all her clothes off. Look at her! She’s shivering.”

"Oh, for fuck's sake, Xander’s right." Heath places a hand on Vee’s arm. "Vee. It's Heath. I'm going to take your wet clothes off, is that okay?"

Vee sighs and mumbles, "I'm cold."

"Yeah. Look, I'll just take your jeans off. Is that okay? Then you can climb into bed."

"Sure." She wriggles but can’t remove her trousers without Heath's help. "I'm tired."

Heath tugs them down, revealing her naked legs. I turn away, remembering them wrapped around me last night. Wrong on so many levels. This is why everything is fucked up.

"Ewan. Let me run through the shit that's happened since yesterday afternoon." I turn my head back to the guys by the bed. "Joss. Maybe leave Heath with Vee; I doubt she'll be happy about us standing around and staring at her half-naked."

Joss grins. "Good point. Who do you think she’d hit the hardest?”

"I wonder what would happen if she did lose her shit with one of us.” Ewan nods at Vee. "Do you reckon she could take us down?”

"I bet she’d win,” replies Joss. "What do you think, Xander?”

I clench my teeth. "Let’s leave her alone.”

As I walk out of the room with Ewan, I hear Heath. "Is that a bruise on Vee’s shoulder? What the hell happened?"

Joss and I glance at each other, and I don't miss his amused smile. I arch an eyebrow in warning, and Joss doesn't reply—to me, or to Heath.

Yeah, but she won.