It had been a few weeks since Jack had asked to Rainn move in with him. Rainn had tried to ignore the subject, but he somehow kept bringing it up in a conversation. She was waiting on him to show up and make her dinner that day in her apartment so she sat on the living room sofa reading a book. She wasn’t really concentrating on it; her mind kept thinking about Jack and when he would show up. She pressed the audio clock that was in the living room and listened keenly to it.

“The time now is 8:45pm,” the automated voice rang through the empty apartment and Rainn smiled when she thought of how she had made it ring exactly two minutes before.

Jack was only fifteen minutes away and her insides began to churn at the thought of him. She could already picture his lovely woody scent and the rugged beard that was carelessly distributed on his face. She thought of his warm embrace and the feel of his masculinity on her body. She thought of the way he always played with her tongue whenever they made out and the way he would let her head rest on his chest every time they were done making love and fulfilling each other’s desires. Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard the distant footsteps approach her door and Jack turning the door knob. She listened keenly to him as he took off his shoes and walked on bare feet to the living room.

“Hello beautiful,” he announced. Rainn could hear him carrying a handful of bags and guessed they were groceries. She listened as he walked over to her and placed a light peck on her left cheek.

“Hello,” she answered “You’re early” she added, as she listened to him walk over to the kitchen counter.

“I decided to show up early. God knows I have other plans with you later in the night,” Jack answered and Rainn could detect the innuendo behind those words. She let out a slight giggle and placed her book aside as she listened to what Jack was doing in the kitchen.

“What are you looking for?” she asked.

“The chopping board.”

“Top shelf to your right,” Rainn answered and listened as Jack opened the cabinet door and pulled out what he needed. Rainn’s kitchen was always organized and immaculately arranged, that was the only way that she could go about it without bumping into things and hurting herself.

“What are you making?” she went on to ask as the whiff of red pepper got to her nostrils.

“Stuffed peppers,” Jack answered “Wine?”

“Yes please.”

Jack walked over to where Rainn was comfortably seated with a glass of wine in hand. He gave it to Rainn who was waiting patiently for him and watched as she took a sip from it.

“Smooth, right?” he asked as he saw how her face lit up from the taste of the wine.

“Yes it is,” she smiled, after letting the wine caress her tongue and glide down her throat. Jack leaned in and placed a kiss on her lips and Rainn detected the scent of gin on his breath.

He waited for him to walk back to the kitchen counter before mastering the courage to ask him about it.

“How much have you had to drink today?” she asked bluntly.

“Not much.”

Rainn was not in the mood for a fight and decided to change the angle of the conversation to something else as soon as she got the defensive response from Jack.

“Tell me about your first encounter with alcohol,” Rainn asked. From the way he laughed at the question she knew that it must be a hilarious story.

“Well, I was a young man trying to experiment with everything,” Jack started “You name it! Pot, cocaine, cigarettes, ecstasy, speed, liquor, heroin; I think I tried out all the drugs that are known to mankind”.

“Meth?” Rainn asked curiously.

“Of course”

Jack let out a nostalgic but half amused chuckle when he said these words.

“But liquor became your poison?” Rainn concluded.

“Unfortunately it did.”

“So how did you not get hooked on the rest of it?” Rainn asked. She had now sat up, her back was still rested on the sofa.

“Various reasons actually,” Jack admitted “For most of the drugs, I was a peddler and could not mix business with pleasure.”

Rainn placed a hand on her mouth to cover her shock but it was a bit too late, Jack had noticed and only let out another laugh.

“Relax sweetie, I retired from that business a long time ago.”

“Thank heavens,” Rainn replied “So tell me the other reasons.”

“Well, I watched a very close friend of mine waste away on meth and decided not to go that way. Cocaine would make my head reel and heroin made me throw up a lot.” Jack explained

“From that, it sounds like you love yourself too much to let yourself waste away on drugs.”

“You could say that.” Jack answered.

He was now done chopping a few onions and Rainn could tell that he was turning on the stove and placing a frying pan on it. She listened as the cooking oil slid around the pan and sniffed as the smell of garlic and onions filled the room.

“So why do you think you are hooked on liquor?” she asked after a few seconds “I think you could always quit if you wanted, it sounds like you’re strong willed enough”.

Jack took a minute to respond, Rainn could hear him play around with the spatula and a few other kitchen utensils.

“Well,” he said before going silent again. He looked in Rainn’s direction and wondered what to say to her. Rainn could tell that he was struggling to tell her something and took a sip from her glass of wine.

“I am not that hooked on it” he said defensively.

“What was the longest time you went without indulging?” Rainn asked.

“Two years.” Jack replied “Not continuously though, I had a few occasional drinks”.

“Really?” Rainn was both impressed and shocked at this revelation.

“What triggered it?” she asked. Rainn was all of a sudden very interested in what Jack had to say and was overcome with curiosity.

“I don’t know precisely but I can guess,” he answered.

Rainn by now knew Jack well enough to know that he never liked being pushed, especially whenever he wanted to say was on his mind. She chose to remain silent and took another sip from her glass; she concluded that the contents of it were almost empty from its light weight.

“More wine?” Jack asked and was swiftly at her side refilling her glass.

“What intentions do you have with me today, Mr?” Rainn asked and let out a naughty smile.

“Only heavenly intentions my dear,” Jack answered before walking back to the kitchen. He placed the wine on the kitchen counter and went about the cooking.

“I don’t hear you having wine like me,” she commented after Jack placed down the bottle. Rainn was trying to get back to the liquor topic without sounding persistent.

“I know what you’re trying to do! Relax, I’m going to tell you the reason I drink a lot!” Jack snapped and immediately wished he hadn’t.

“Ok,” was all Rainn could say. She took another sip of her wine and was slowly beginning to feel light headed. She had taken an early lunch and the wine had started having effects on her. She thought of the night ahead with Jack and grew excited at the idea of it.

Jack was almost done making dinner and began setting plates for both of them. He threw a quick glance at the sofa and loved how beautiful Rainn looked. She was effortlessly beautiful in anything she wore. She had her legs propped up on the sofa and her hair fell back on her shoulders in a tangled mess. Jack guessed that she had not left the house that day from her comfortable lounge wear. The glass of wine that she kept swinging from her hand to mouth was the icing on the cake. She did it with such elegance that all Jack could think of was how he would draw her closer to him and make sweet love to her.

“I have a dark past,” he said out of the blue and loved how Rainn leaned in closer and more attentive to what he had just said. She did not respond to him and he did not expect her to.

“My parents abandoned me when I was a child and I find my solace in liquor,” Jack confessed.

“Have you ever tried going for therapy?”

“Gin is my therapy, Rainn” he said and walked over to where she was comfortably seated, carrying the two plates in his hands.

Rainn wondered and struggled with the right words to say and Jack noticed.

“Go right ahead, tell me what it is that you’re thinking,” Jack said and walked back to the kitchen to get cutlery.

“I think that you need therapy, gin won’t really work for you at the end of the day”, Rainn said and went on to sip from her wine glass. She could feel the whiff of food play on her nostrils and her stomach made a growling noise.

“I think so too,” Jack agreed but he was only doing it to try and end the conversation.

“So how would you describe your relationship with your parents?” Rainn asked. She had already picked up her fork and was only being loyal to her hunger at that time.

“Distant”

“With both parents?”

“I don’t blame my mother for her mistakes,” Jack replied. Rainn could tell that he too had started eating from the way he was talking between mouthfuls. The food was delicious and she liked how the different flavors all exploded in her mouth.

“Who do you blame for her mistakes?” Rainn asked curiously. She never believed in the shifting of burden and thought that every human being should be able to take their own responsibilities when need arose.

“My father.”

“How so?”

“He drove her insane and she was never really stable to be the good parent that she ought to have been,” Jack explained. Rainn detected a hint of deep and intense emotion in his words.

“You sound like you hate him?”

What followed after shocked Rainn; for a moment, fear overwhelmed her and she held her breath.

Jack slammed down his fist on the table hard. All she could hear was the cutlery clutter around the table.

“I don’t hate him”, he said after his fist had landed on the glass coffee table “I loathe him and maybe dislike him slightly”.

Rainn remained still, her nostrils caught the metallic whiff of blood and she knew that Jack must have cut himself in his rage.

“You should disinfect that.” she advised.

“I don’t think this food is safe to eat now,” he sighed and got the two plates from the table. “Let me order some pizza right after I clean this”.

He walked to the kitchen then headed over to the bathroom to look for disinfectant and a bandage. Rainn was left by herself guessing and confirming the usual sounds of water running and the scent of disinfectant. She was slightly disappointed about the meal but was nevertheless happy about that revelation. She knew that it was a breakthrough for him and it was something she could work on with him to help his healing process.

“This talk just made me have a grand idea!” Jack exclaimed after walking into the living room and swiftly sitting next to Rainn.

“Let’s hear it.” Rainn answered. She felt a comfortable feeling sweep over her when he approached him and sat next to her.

“I would like you to meet my mother,” he announced.

Rainn could feel her blood freeze at the mention of this and hugged herself in a tight embrace.

“Are you sure about that?” Rainn asked shocked and nearly dumbfounded.

“I am.” Jack replied “I want her to meet the woman who makes me happy and smile.”

“This is a huge step you know?”

“Yes I know that and I want to take it with you, nobody else”, Jack replied.

Rainn loved how he placed an assuring hand over hers and she didn’t worry anymore.

“Ok” she said before melting into his embrace and letting him have his way with her. She felt all her doubts melt away and her fears dissolved. She wondered what Jack’s mother would be like; in her mind she painted a picture of an elderly woman who was as tall as Jack. Rainn pictured her stylish and fashionable with a pleasant personality.

“It will all be alright”, she said to herself a few times. The words soothed her and made her hopeful.