Her eyes kept drifting shut, and the words swam on the page, but she was way too comfy to give in and go to bed. Not when cuddling with her hunky man while they both read turned out to be such lovely fun.
When he returned from what should have been a simple beverage run she nearly fell over laughing.
“What’s this?” she’d asked when he wheeled a cart into the room.
“Well,” he confessed with a great deal of self-congratulatory aplomb, “the lady at the front desk chatted me up and next thing I knew I’d told her my wife was kind of miserable from being cooped up in a truck all day with cramps. Apparently saying cramps is some universal signal you ladies use to communicate.” He was having a jolly laugh that swept her along. “Next thing I knew she hooked me up with a thermos of hot water, tea bags of all sorts, cream, sugar, honey, lemon. Pretty much a little of everything they had. Plus, a plate of pastries—just in case the chocolate coma from earlier wasn’t enough sugar for the day.”
She’d clapped her hands and giggled. Then, because verbal burps happen when you’re least expecting it, she declared, “I love you!”
“Oh Jesus,” he’d laughed. “Don’t make this too easy, Carina. It’s just tea.”
The joke was on him because she truly did love him at that moment for not rubbing her nose in what she said and for taking her motor-mouth flub in stride.
They’d been comfortably curled on the sofa for the past hour, silently reading. Most of the time he had his hand under her sweater, pressed to her lower back and occasionally rubbing in small circles that did a lot to ease her discomfort.
Because he seemed to have some mystical awareness of her physical needs, he’d squashed her dissent in quick order and demanded she take another analgesic. It had helped earlier, so she gave in and did what he asked.
The pain relief, his gentle touch, a belly full of warm tea, Tom Sawyer and a comfortable shoulder to lean on sent her to bliss town.
A yawn forced her mouth open wide. She rubbed her nose on his soft cotton shirt. He patted her leg and kissed the top of her hair.
“Hey, sleepyhead. Time for bed?”
“No,” she grumbled. Burrowing deeper she murmured, “I like it here.”
“Tell you what. You go put on whatever you’re sleeping in and get ready, and I’ll turn down the bed. When you come back, I’ll give you a back rub to help you sleep.”
“You want me to sleep here? With you? But I thought because…”
“You thought that I’d make you sleep in another room because fucking you into tomorrow isn’t on the menu?”
She jerked at his words. “Ouch. That’s a bit harsh don’t you think?”
“It’s what your overactive brain came up with so save the denials. Here’s something you need to know. Despite what you pick up from cultural depictions of today’s man, I do not always let my dick do the thinking.”
“You have a dirty mouth,” she answered with a snarky chuckle.
“And your point would be?”
She dropped the book and wrapped him in her arms. “I’m okay with dirty.”
“Whew! Good to know I dodged that bullet.”
She reacted without thinking, pressing her fingers to his lips. “No, no. Shh. I don’t want that in my head.”
His gaze softened. He nodded slightly to show he understood. “Sorry. Warrior humor.”
“And I’m sorry for being so…out of my depth with you.”
“Having a relationship isn’t all fuckery all the time.”
She had to laugh. He wasn’t trying to be funny but damn! “Don’t tell me that,” she joked. “I was sort of hoping for some, um…options.”
“Says the woman who was just dozing off and yawning like crazy.”
“Busted,” she chuckled.
“How long does this go on?” he asked.
“You mean having my period? It’s okay to say the words, Roman. I’m not a delicate flower who cringes at the sight of blood or who can’t handle some gritty with my nitty.”
“Oh dear god,” he cried on a burst of laughter. “Gritty with your nitty. Rhiann is going to love you. Get ready for your first fangirl.”
“You like this woman. A lot.”
“Indeed. I thought she was unique. One-of-a-kind. And then I met you. Now I’m sure there’s a whole tribe out there of bad ass babes who I swear to god were put on earth for the lofty purpose of keeping men’s butts in check.”
Good answer. She wasn’t nearly as resistant to Rhiann as she was to that other person.
“What’s she do? Or is she arm candy?”
“Arm candy? Holy mother of god. No! Not at all. Shit, that’s funny, though.” He offered a winking grin. “Rhiann Wilde is a writer. At least that’s what she told me to say if you asked.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“It means, sweetheart, that she had a good job, a career and a secret life. One day those things crashed headlong into each other. When the dust settled, the career got kicked to the curb and with Liam’s love and support she let her secret life out of the bag. Rhiann collects words like a squirrel gathers nuts. Her superpower is a bad mouth…something you have in common.”
Another good answer. She’d keep probing, but her internal timer just went off. It was time to hit the snore pads.
He stood, effortlessly, with her cradled in his arms. What was this wonderful feeling? She wanted to freeze the moment in time so that she could replay it over and over.
Carrying her into the gleaming white tiled bathroom, he sat her carefully on the closed toilet. His hand lingered on her face, caressing a cheek and lightly tracing her lips. How could such a big man be so gentle?
“We share everything, Carina. Even the bathroom. Don’t try to hide with Matty.”
Aw. He was awfully cute. “Uh, okay.”
“What would you like to wear to bed? Tell me, and I’ll bring it to you.”
Hey, she thought. Hold on a minute. This waiting on her hand and foot was all kinds of interesting. She might like letting his bad self be in charge. His manly psyche would certainly like the chance.
“Can I have your t-shirt?”
He did an adorable double-take and scraped his fingers through his hair. “Um, uh…any t-shirt or one in particular?”
She eyed the long sleeve Henley he wore and inclined her head. “What you have on will do.”
There was a slight pause, and then he drew in a long breath that made his chest expand. After that, he pulled the shirt from his waistband and hauled it over his head. When he handed it off, her waving hand missed it by a mile because her attention diverted to his mind-blowingly muscular torso.
Laughing, he bent to retrieve the fallen shirt, stood up and pretended to wipe drool off the corner of her mouth then asked with a smirking grin, “Have you ever had a cat?”
A cat? What the hell was he going on about?
“Some will tell you that cats aren’t trainable. They’re wrong. All you need is a squirt gun. Every time kitty wanders off or gets into mischief, a quick squirt or two brings them right back into line.”
Kelly blinked. Seriously. What was he dithering about?
“You give so much away with your face, Carina. I think it’s adorable. And hot. But you haven’t found your game face yet. The one you’ll need when I get you off in a room full of people.”
Oh jeez. She got where he was going and started to giggle.
“I’m not into toys all that much. Equipment? Yes. Toys? No,” he drawled suggestively.
What the hell did that mean?
“But I think a squirt gun to zap you out of that very sexy trance you fall into might qualify as equipment. What do you think?”
She smacked him on the thigh. “I think if you come at me with a squirt gun all hell will break loose.”
“Promise?”
“Oh my god,” she wheezed through laughter. “You’re even worse than Matty. It really IS a guy thing!”
Pushing him away she said, “Get out. I’m good with sharing a bathroom, but no way am I peeing in front of you.”
“Thank god,” he drawled. “There is such a thing as too much togetherness.” He kissed her forehead and exited saying, “Yell if you need anything.”
Watching him leave was pure man candy. His front was drool-inducing but his back? Impressive. Broad shoulders, tapered waist and an ass begging for attention.
Aieee!
When she finished up and wandered into the bedroom, she saw right away that he’d moved her bags. He was doing that staking a claim thing again.
In the adjoining room, she found him by the window watching Matty sleep. The way he stood and the vibe he put off was protective and loving. Her gut told her Roman was a wonderful role model for the youngster. Just the little she knew about him made her appreciate all the more how important qualities like compassion with a side of honor would be for Matty as he grew.
Shielding him from comparisons or whispers about his parents, especially what appeared to be a complete douche-canoe for a father, was her new worry.
Roman looked up when she came through the door. He raised a finger to his lips. She nodded her understanding.
Creeping quietly across the room, she knelt by Matty’s head. He was sound asleep with a small smile curling his little mouth. She kissed him softly on the cheek and adjusted the blanket.
In all the excitement of the road trip, she hadn’t remembered to make sure he said his gratitude prayers. Damn. Keeping him grounded and aware was more important than ever.
Turning the bedside light off, she gently touched his hair. Roman had moved away, so she glanced about and found him playing with the remote control. Classical music, exactly what Matty was used to, floated in the air.
Satisfied, he dropped the controller and looked at her. His hand came out. She gave Matty a final look and then went to her man. Her fingers touched his, and he drew her in. Kelly studied their entwined hands. Without thinking, she chewed her bottom lip.
Tiny explosions of panic fired off inside her. She’d never let anyone in. Hell, there hadn’t ever been anyone around to be let in. The lack of friends and peers, years of social isolation, and the belief that she was better off that way clashed with one irrefutable fact—she hadn’t ever felt alive or truly connected to the world until she met Roman Bishop.
And admitting that put her in a tenuous spot. It wasn’t easy to acknowledge this need. And why? Because wants and needs made her vulnerable. Vulnerability killed her mother.
The taste of blood in her mouth stopped the frantic lip chomp. She pulled it together with one final thought. Her mom’s vulnerability also brought Matthew James into her life.
Everything had a good and not-so-good side. Her challenge was to cling tightly to the hope that being vulnerable to Roman was the start of something wonderful and not the first step along the road to hell.
He was up at the ass crack of dawn after a sound night’s sleep. And there was a warm, female body wrapped around his in the unfamiliar and slightly uncomfortable bed.
Inhaling deeply, he breathed her in before his eyes cranked open. Mmm. Yes. Waking up with a sweet sexy pixie sprawled on his chest was all kinds of awesome.
She’d been restless after finally drifting off. Amazed that sleeping together was as satisfying as the other things they did together in bed, he’d been more than content to hold her close and rub her back until sleep eventually claimed her.
He liked that there weren’t previous experiences with men to mess with her head. It made showing her how special this relationship was and how much he cared for her an adventure and not a chore. The truth was it turned out to be quite enjoyable.
Relaxed, happy and oddly at peace, Roman lay there and took the moment in. There was no question in his mind that he’d found her…
What he felt was different from before. Shit, it was worlds different. He’d regret losing Vanessa and their child every day he lived, but what they said was true after all. Life does move on, and if he was going to commit himself to this, it was time to send the past packing. Kelly deserved nothing less than one hundred and ten percent of his attention, so he vowed this would be the last time he’d think about the bad stuff. He’d retain only the sweetness and move on. With Kelly and Matty. As a family. A rather immediate and shocking family, but considering the rest of his unconventional life he had to concede the point, why the hell not?
She stirred slightly but didn’t wake up. Good. He liked how it felt to wake up with her even if the surroundings were stripped down and basic. Plus, it gave him more time to think.
Today was going to be busy, and at the end of the day they’d be in New York, at his home, and a new chapter in so many lives would begin.
He’d put his foot down when Liam attempted to badger him into an immediate face-to-face with Kelly as soon as they landed. There was no fucking way he was going to fast-Freddy her. Roman counted it a small victory when he persuaded him to back off and agree to wait until the following day.
Since the very suggestion of a private plane set her off, he’d been tiptoeing around the subject. There wasn’t a lot she could offer as a counter-argument when the legal documentation problem came up, but that didn’t mean she was happy about being boxed in.
At this point, he was praying she woke up in a good mood and didn’t give him too much shit. Matty was going to be enough of a handful.
A low groan came out of her mouth. The warmth of her breath skittered across his skin. His damn cock reacted. Being a somewhat smart guy, he’d wisely slept in his briefs. Temptation and morning erections being strong influences, he’d decided to err on the side of caution. And a good thing too, because one of her legs was wedged between his thighs. All it would take was a slight shift in position, and he could slide inside her.
“Ergh. Ugh.”
Uh oh. That did not sound good. Not when her eyes hadn’t even opened yet.
All of a sudden she shot up, pushed off him and plopped on her butt where she sat cross-legged and slightly hunched. He immediately got moving and slid to his feet next to the bed.
When she finally looked up, he had to hold back a laugh. She resembled the victim of a hurricane. Her hair was everywhere, and by everywhere he meant everywhere. Some was sticking straight up, but mostly she looked like a cartoon character after putting her finger in an electric socket.
The corners of her lush mouth turned down in a scowling frown. There were dark circles under each eye, and her body language screamed misery.
Grabbing a pillow, she scrunched it up and folded it against her stomach. Then she glared at him and whatever smile he’d been fighting withered under her baleful glower.
The look she spared his way-too-obvious erection almost singed his flesh.
Oookay, then. Hmm. He didn’t have a chance to say a thing before she muttered, “Shut up.”
Not knowing what the hell to do or say, he opted for silence and waited for whatever came next.
The pillow went sailing through the air when she scooted to the side of the bed and stood up. Yanking the hem of his shirt down, her pursed lips and fierce scowl reminded him of an outraged prude.
“Things you need to know,” she whined after an unsuccessful attempt to calm her hair. “Day two sucks.”
Then she stomped off toward the bathroom and shut the door.
Well, the good news was that they’d found a way to communicate important stuff. He knew what to do and sprang into action. As he snuck into Matty’s room to check on the still sleeping kid, he finally laughed.
Women! Who can figure it out? The comparison was hysterically amusing. After slam fucking for hours, she appeared fresh as a daisy. But this? Roman snickered to himself. His hat was definitely off to the fearsome power of a woman’s cycle, ‘cause that shit left marks!
She crawled back into bed and pulled the covers over her head. What a lousy time to get taken down by her damn period.
Bloated, uncomfortable and fending off a major case of the bitches, she wanted to curl up and die. Whoever decided that putting women through this shit every thirty days was the way to go needed an ass-kicking.
The only thing she had going for her at the moment was the time. It was barely six thirty, which meant she had a guaranteed hour until reporting for Matty duty.
A hand touched her shoulder, and the bed dipped. “Honey? Here. Sit up a minute, okay?”
She slammed the covers back with a pissed off grunt and snarled. “Don’t wanna.”
“Now, come on. Don’t be difficult.” He lifted her upright with an arm around her shoulders.
She couldn’t believe how easy it was to pout at him. “Feel like shit.”
“Yeah, I got that,” he murmured. Putting two tablets in her hand, he motioned with his head. “Upped the ante. Think you can use the extra oomph.”
Swallowing the pills took extra effort and half a bottle of water. She looked at him miserably and gathered her fright wig hair into a bunch. “What time do we check out?”
“Couple of hours. Don’t worry. It’s not like the plane will leave without us. When we get there, we get there.”
“Silver lining after all,” she muttered harshly.
Roman’s deep chuckle and cheery “Now see?” made her even grumpier.
“Matty,” she said in a barely audible voice.
“Covered. When he gets up, I’ll take him downstairs for breakfast. And whatever you want, I’ll bring back to the room.”
“He can’t have sugary cereal.”
“Yeah, I know,” he drawled. “Been paying attention. I promise he’ll drink milk.”
She gave up. What was the point in issuing instructions? He had a damn answer for everything. Snarling “Oh, fine!” she threw herself down on a pillow, assumed the fetal position and hauled the covers back over her head. “I want oatmeal. The lady at the front desk said there’d be oatmeal.”
Roman’s amused chuckle was audible through the blankets.
“You got it, babe. Oatmeal it is.”
If she could kick him in the shins, she would. Just because.
If there were a Guinness challenge for the number of times a kid said ‘Wow,’ Matty would win. Starting with the run-of-the-mill road hotel, free breakfast, through the check-in procedure at the private plane terminal and as they crossed the tarmac was one amazed wow after another.
Liam, being perfectly aware of Roman’s preferences, hooked them up with a large-cabin Gulfstream roomy enough for a dozen people. Far from overkill, it was however pretty obvious that it was more plane than three people needed.
The pilot, an affable guy calling himself Captain Nemo, made a huge fuss over Matty. Not only did he present the kid with the standard wing pin, but he also took him into the cockpit and let him say hello over the com system. He also laid down the aviation rules.
No yelling.
No running.
Seatbelt on when instructed.
Matty was awestruck.
Kelly? Not so much.
You’re all set folks,” he told them after pointing out the galley stocked with their selections and the entertainment options. “Flight time about six hours. It’ll be night time when we arrive.”
After some more pleasantries, he saluted smartly and went about his business.
Roman got them strapped in and comfortable. Both of them were wide-eyed and nervous, so he started rambling.
“Normally there’d be a flight attendant, but I’m an old hand at this. Know my way around a galley,” he assured them.
Matty asked if there was a bathroom. Kelly played with the cuffs on her sweater and said nothing.
Take-off was uneventful. For him. He’d done this too many times, so his reactions were, meh. Once they were safely in the air, and at cruising altitude, he started moving around the cabin. In the galley, he unwrapped a charcuterie board, a fruit platter, and a couple of mini-milks that got shoved into an ice bucket. The sight of Bologna folded in tidy logs made him smile. So did the enormous selection of teas in a trendy little burlap bag. He was relieved to learn that his friend had being paying attention. Liam was using his damn head for a change.
Hmm. He paused for a moment and wondered who Liam put in charge of making the arrangements. A quick sweeping glance up and down the length of the cabin and he was more than sure Rhiann wasn’t the source person for their flight. If she were, there would be welcome bags and if he knew her at all, cushy slippers for Kelly and the boy. There’d also be cashmere throws draped over the seats. And flowers. Lots of flowers. It hadn’t taken her long once she was firmly established in Liam’s life to turn a tiny delight into a full blown tour-de-force. It was a Wilde sister quirk. Probably instigated by Charlize, Rhiann’s baby sis. She was the resident hippie-girl of the three and forever going on and on about being present and smelling the coffee or in this case, the flowers.
With none of that in evidence, he concluded it was Gardner in charge. He loved Marjorie Gardner in a Bruce Wayne and Alfred kind of way. She was Liam’s undisputed right hand at BPG and, just like Roman, had far more personal connection to the man than what you’d expect of an employee.
He tried to imagine the conversation. Liam explaining Kelly and Matty’s imminent arrival and that the pair were traveling with Roman and under his wing. Nothing rattled Gardner. He admired the quality. The woman could lead the way through an onslaught of hungry zombies, swatting back each threat with her usual unflappable calm, while consulting a guide for surviving an undead apocalypse without her heart rate increasing one little bit.
They could have used a kickass babe like Marjorie Gardner in the war. She wouldn’t take anybody’s shit—no matter which team they played for.
As he slid into the leather seat across from Kelly she barely looked up. He wished she didn’t look so damn unhappy. It was going to be a long flight.
The sky seemed bluer at thirty thousand feet. And the clouds. They were different, too; floating around the plane in solo white puffs instead of as two-dimensional scenery viewed from the ground.
She liked blue. It was an excellent color with an infinite number of shades to play around with. There was dark blue, sky blue, and baby blue. There was also cerulean and azure. Color words to describe the endless shades were limited only by one’s imagination. Periwinkle, teal, indigo and midnight. Blue was perfect for so many things.
A stained glass design formed in her thoughts. Using only her imagination, she built a hinged box from scratch in opalescent glass done in flowing swirls to suggest movement. It would be mid-range in size. Nothing too small and definitely not bulky.
Roman touched her leg. Half-startled that she’d been so far away, Kelly blinked and quickly checked to be sure Matty was behaving.
“I’m not sure you heard a word I said. Where’d you go?”
She crossed her legs and arms. The defensive posture was stiff and ridiculous considering who she was with, where they were, and the innocence of the question.
Overreact much? Sheesh. Damn period hormones.
Lifting her shoulder in a defeated shrug, she gave up and rearranged in the seat one more time. She wasn’t used to being inactive. There was a universe of difference between still and sedentary. Living a busy life lacking down-time shaped her habits. When there was nothing to do, she well…she didn’t know what to do.
Was the explanation lacking in eloquence and making no sense at all? Yes, but there you have it. The world according to Kelly James. Not knowing what to do when there was nothing to do.
“I was in my workroom. The one in my head. Sorry. What were you saying?”
His mouth twitched. He was holding back a laugh or comment. Was she being that difficult?
“If I don’t make any sudden moves, will you please come sit with me?” Patting the leather chair next to his as encouragement, he lifted his tempting mouth into a lopsided smile with eyes hopeful and wide. “Pretty please with whipped cream and a cherry on top?”
She ducked her head for a brief second to hide the amusement and then came back with a response that made him bark with laughter.
“Make it two cherries with extra whipped cream, and I’ll take your request under consideration.”
“Sprinkles?” he quipped.
“Ew, no.” She stuck out her tongue and made a face. “Yuck.”
“Fudge sauce or caramel?”
She groaned. “Now you’re just mean.”
He shook his head. “What? How?”
“Things you need to know,” she announced snippily with an exaggerated hair flip for shits and grins. “Don’t poke the bear.”
“Uh,” he mock-growled in a warm, teasing voice. “There’s a bear?”
She rolled her eyes and lingered with her gaze heavenward as if praying for patience. “Yes, you boob. In this scenario, I am the bear. Would you poke a bear for any reason? No. Not if you’re sane. Bear poking when said bear has um, female issues, is suicidal. Waving imaginary ice cream, whipped cream, fudge and cherries in my face is akin to bear poking. Cut it out unless you want to be a eunuch.”
“Lady,” he snickered in his sexy drawl. “Using words like akin and eunuch in a conversation is practically guaranteed to end with you being bent over the end of the sofa with your panties in my back pocket so I can demonstrate why not castrating me benefits you. Or, if you want to get specific, benefits your pussy. Take your pick.”
She smacked his knee, swiftly flew across the space between them, and swung into the chair by his side. He’d raised the armrest making the spot more like a loveseat. “Will you watch your language please?”
He glanced at Matty who was gleefully ignoring them while coloring on a large art pad with a plastic pencil box crammed full of new crayons—a surprise gift from Roman to commemorate his first airplane flight.
The innocent butter-wouldn’t-melt-in-his-mouth expression as he put a hand on his chest in faux outrage over her slapping him down was freakin’ hilarious.
“I thought you liked dirty talk.” He sounded like a kid who just learned the tooth fairy was bullshit.
Well, she sniffed. He had her there.
Once he’d pried open the floodgates to her dammed up sexuality and let the deluge of lust she felt for him run freely, the filthy words he taught her fell quite easily off her tongue.
Bringing every drop of prude she had to her reply was easy considering her current hormonal phase. “Do not be a dick.”
She yelped and tried to smack him when he pulled her into a loose headlock with one arm and drew her close to mutter thickly in her ear. “Mmm. Pussy and dick in the same conversation. Continue.”
“What is wrong with you?” Giggle-snorting, she pushed away from him and sat back in her seat.
“God, so much,” he drawled in response. “But not nearly so much since I met you.”
“Hey. Don’t blame me for your guy problems. The way I recall this thing going down, you were already second hand, dinged, dented, and generally full of shit when you teleported into my life.”
The look he gave off came damn close to setting her jeans on fire. She more than liked how he did that. Did it bother her at all that she quite literally met, got bitchy with, touched, and then bedded the hunky stranger who came fully loaded with an agenda?
Eh. Maybe a little bit. Not enough, though. Whatever this thing between them was, to her, it felt right. If he fucked her over in the end, she would have to deal with it.
Still, he didn’t give off a threatening vibe and had asked, well, actually…both of them asked the other for a bit of trust. In her estimation, these things were clues to his true character.
There was no denying Roman was in a tough spot. But she was grateful for the effort he put into being on her side. And for not scaring or rushing her. If she couldn’t trust that and him, then she wasn’t capable of the emotion.
“Why don’t you get up and move around? All this sitting has to suck.”
Does it show, she wondered? The restless tension. Was it apparent to others?
“No,” he murmured quietly. His head shook back and forth. It was freaky and comforting to know he read her so easily.
He took her hand and twined their fingers together. This was another thing she liked. The handholding.
“I know what it’s like.” He sounded serious.
Kelly felt a pull on her senses. The draw. She shifted closer and turned into him when he started to speak.
“Being in a war is a twenty-four-seven, three-sixty-five deal. When it’s happening all around you, there’s no such thing as intermission or let up. Me and my crew would take an out-of-country R ‘n’ R break and end up supersonic with our balls on fire the whole time instead of chillaxing. It took a couple of months for me to downshift and find a new gear.”
“But you knew what your other life contained. What it smelled like. How it felt. I just blew up every shred of familiar. None of this is real to me.”
“Carina.” The slow, lazy drawl claimed her full attention. “We are alike. I see the warrior in you.”
All the air caught in her chest. To him, she wasn’t invisible or forgotten.
“My time on the battlefield had a beginning and a middle and an end. Fuck, babe. I even knew the date when my service would wrap up. You never knew anything else, and there was no end in sight.”
“Until Matty,” she hastily reminded him. “Matty changed everything.”
“Ah, exactly. The boy. He gave you the confidence to imagine a different life.”
Thinking about his words, she stared at their joined hand and welcomed the surge of heat shooting up her arm. He was so right. She did a better job as a single mother than other girls her age that had given birth. The experience wasn’t without benefits either. The confidence and determination she nurtured along with Matty had done well by them so far.
And she’d done it all with nothing. Less than nothing.
“Honey. You’re showing some serious cojones by taking a shot in the dark. I’m humbled by your strength. Every leap of faith is a judgment call.” He raised their joined hands and kissed hers. “I’ve got your back, Kelly.”
It all poured out of her. Every doubt, insecurity, worry, fear, and folly. He listened without censure and never let go of her hand. When she got to the part about how the fish out of water analogy fit and that she felt vulnerable, exposed and naked, he put two fingers on her lips to silence the outburst.
“I’ll just say again that nothing will happen without your consent. There’s no time frame, no need to rush. We’re on your schedule. However long it takes and whatever you need. I’m there for you.”
“What if I hate the city?”
She didn’t expect the scoffing snicker. “You won’t be the first. The city is a love-hate thing to begin with, so don’t beat yourself up about it. Besides, nothing’s set in stone.”
Relief spread throughout her body. Oh, thank god. She needed to hear that.
“Um, Roman?” Worried Matty might hear she carefully whispered. “What happens when we land? I know you explained all that earlier, but I wasn’t paying attention.”
“Our body clocks will think it’s early evening. Right after dinner. But on east coast time, it’ll be around ten. We’ll load our stuff into an SUV and go straight to my place. Rhiann sent a text. The refrigerator is packed, and she put a plastic container full of homemade chili in the front, so we don’t have to dig for it. That’s it. Promise. Plane to apartment and then we shut the door. Tomorrow will take care of itself.”
She said one last thing, waited for him to laugh at her, and ended up doing a double, triple take when his reaction was the complete opposite.
Wiggling her hand away from his grip, she got manic in a heartbeat. “I look like a slob. My hair’s a mess. Ginny trimmed it for me but still. My wardrobe is nothing but jeans, t-shirts, and hoodies. Hell, Roman, I don’t have a purse or a wallet. You heard what Matty said. He wasn’t kidding either. I’m almost twenty-four years old and haven’t ever worn a dress. My shoes are from the Thrift Store. Buried in the woods, I didn’t care about these things. Oh, I knew,” she assured him somberly, “that when Matty and I moved I’d have to make some sort of socially acceptable effort. But not at a finger snap. Or overnight.”
By the end of her tirade, Kelly was out of breath and felt even more emotional.
The way he looked at her made everything happening around them shift into slow motion. She felt like the center of the universe.
“You are,” he breathed heavily, “ the most beautiful, alluring, gorgeous female alive on this or any other planet. Truth, honey. I would never set you up with a lie just to spare your feelings. And before you object by cutting me off with a few more of your imagined shortcomings, relax. Did you think I’d put you in a situation where you’d feel…less?”
“It’s not you,” she persisted. “Nice thought but you don’t rule the world.”
“I think this is a wrap it up moment, so it’s my turn to do the cutting off. Maybe not the smoothest surprise ever but at least I tried. Rhiann got both of you hooked up with a few casual outfits.”
Her jaw dropped.
“Master Matthew James will be dressed by Gap for kids. I believe there is even a pack of dinosaur boy-briefs. She wouldn’t go into detail, but I know Rhi. Whatever she came up for you with will be casual, low-key and super comfortable.”
Swallowing took effort as she tried to wrap her head around this development.
“How much did she spend? I mean, I’m sure I can cover it but, uh…” Oh shit. She sounded ungrateful when all she wanted to do was take care of her own shit.
“Kelly. Hon. I know it’s tempting to deny that you’re a fairly wealthy young woman, but ignoring the facts won’t make them go away. Money is not the issue. Rhiann understands major life changes. She’s just trying to be helpful.”
“It’s not her. I don’t want that man’s filthy money.”
Roman grunted. She knew he understood and was grateful he didn’t try to soften her bitchiness.
“By ‘that man’ I hope you’re referring to Adam Ward and not your brother. Liam isn’t the bad guy in all this. He’s also trying to do the right thing.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” She shut down like a steel door closing. There was only so much she could take.
He didn’t push. Part of her wanted to argue for the sake of arguing, but he wouldn’t engage. By cutting her off at the knees and conceding to her emotional hide-and-seek maneuvers, he drained her denials and arguments of their oomph.
Dick.
She slid her gaze to his handsome profile and amended the thought.
Hot, crazy, sexy, and funny as shit, dick.
Flicking a piece of fuzz off her jeans, she counted the time left in the flight and returned to worrying about everything.
He’d said tomorrow would take care of itself.
She sighed heavily and thought, ‘Is it ever that simple?’