13
Travis
After Abby and I got in the car, my mind was still pretty distracted. I was torn between who it was that my father had this other life with and the notion that Sophie was here in Canon. I hadn’t seen Sophie since the end of that summer after our freshman year at college. I had decided at that point that I didn’t want to go back to college, that it had little to offer me, and I was ready to move on with my life. I had already signed up to take the fireman’s exam and was ready to do that, and I was hoping Sophie was ready to start a life with me, away from college, away from Canon.
Unfortunately, she didn’t see it the same way. To her, school was important, and it was her goal to get her education, become a teacher, and make a difference that way. She never planned on coming back to Canon, at least when we had talked about life after college. She had ambitions of becoming a teacher at a school somewhere that needed a lot of help, like an inner city. I tried to plead with her that she could still do that and go with me to wherever we would end up, but she didn’t seem ready to give up the life she had at school, or in Canon, even though there wasn’t much keeping her here. Like me, she was an only child and basically grew up with just a mother in her life. Her father had left when we were in grade school together, and it hit her pretty hard. She was attached to her mother, and even through high school she didn’t go out much. We never moved in the same circles, but I sure noticed her, even if it was from afar.
She has always had that something special about her. It was more than just the way she looked. Sophie was always very pretty, and her blue eyes could certainly catch attention, but to me, it was her radiant smile and the sweet way that she seemed to approach life. She was nice to everyone, even if people weren’t nice to her, because that’s just the way she was. I never was able to work up the courage to ask her out in high school because I always felt she was smarter than me and could do better. When I got to college that freshman year and saw her at orientation, it was like we were drawn to each other right away.
There we were, two kids away from home for the first time, and we found someone from that little hole-in-the-wall town we were from. We clung to each other for weeks after that until we started to get settled in and meet people. By then, I was completely in love with her but still couldn’t tell her that. It was only after we went to a party together after a football game, and I had way too much to drink and was sitting outside with her, that I told her how I felt about her. She said she had feelings for me as well, and that was the night of our first kiss.
After that we were inseparable. I walked Sophie to different classes each day, we had meals together, went out on dates and to parties, and spent as much time together as possible. I loved being with her and wanted to be as close to her as possible, but she made it clear to me almost from the start that she was virgin and planned to stay that way for now. I respected her decision, as frustrating as it could be at times. Some of our make-out sessions would go on for a long time, and we would end up in various states of undress, but it never went any further than that.
By the time the spring semester had ended, and we came home together, I was deeply in love with her. She came over to my mother’s house for meals and to hang out, or we hung out at the restaurant. I worked there over the summer while she worked at Simmons, the local department store, in the women’s department. She would come over to the restaurant after her shift and sit with me or help me clean up after closing. Then we would stay up watching movies, talking on the porch, or making out in my room.
We didn’t spend much time at her house since her mother didn’t really approve of her having a boyfriend. She wanted Sophie to commit herself to school and not get distracted, and her mother made it very clear to me that Sophie had goals and ideas that were to be honored. It wasn’t until the end of summer approached, and it was almost time to go back to school, that I sprang my plan on her. The notion intrigued her, of us living together somewhere while I became a fireman, but that initial intrigue was gone by the next day. Sophie told me she needed to go back to school and begged me to go with her. I told her I couldn’t give up on my dream any more than she could give up on hers. We argued, there were tears, and when everything was said, she hugged me goodnight. The next day when I went to her mother’s house to see her, Mrs. Ingram told me she had left early to go back to school. That was the last time I saw her.
That was fourteen years ago, and now here she was, in my mother’s restaurant, in the same picture as my daughter. Was she just visiting her own mother in town? I wasn’t even sure if Mrs. Ingram was still living in Canon. Maybe she was passing through and stopped in to see friends. Or maybe she lived here now. It seemed like more than my brain could take at the moment.
The car seemed to drive itself over to the Homestead. Since it was only nearly 4 PM, there wasn’t much going on in there. Lunch was long over, and dinner had yet to start. I parked in the parking lot and Abby, and I hopped out. Abby raced to the front door and through, excited to go see her grandmother and let her know about the house. I, on the other hand, had other things I needed to find out about.
When I got through the front door, I saw Abby standing over at the bar talking to Mom. I strode over, feeling a mix of anger, confusion, and excitement. Abby was going a mile a minute about the house and how great it was while Mom was just nodding along. I stood behind Abby and waited for her to finish rambling on. When she finally paused, Mom looked up at me and saw I had a serious look on my face.
“Hey Abs, why don’t you go to the kitchen and see if Henry needs any help with some prep work,” she said to Abby calmly.
Abby looked at me, and that back at my mother, and saw we needed to talk.
“Sure Grandma,” she said cautiously and walked over through the swinging doors into the kitchen. Mom got back behind the bar and was straightening things up.
“What’s wrong, Travis?” she said to me as she put glassware away. “You have that look on your face you used to get when you were young, and something was troubling you. Everything alright at the house? Abby seemed to think so.”
I sat on one of the stools and talked as Mom kept cleaning.
“The house was fine. The outside needs some work, but the inside was, well, perfect. It looked like the maids had just come through and cleaned the whole thing.”
Mom turned and faced me with a stunned look.
“Really? Your father’s house? That man never cleaned a damn thing when he lived with us.”
“I remember. It was pretty puzzling. The place was spotless. No food in the fridge, the beds were made, no dust, the floor was clean. It was like someone was expecting Dad to come home at any minute.”
Mom poured me a beer from the tap and passed it over to me. I took a long sip of the cold red ale she gave me. It felt great going down after a long day.
“There were some other puzzling things too,” I told her. “Did you know Dad had an insurance policy? And a ton of money in the bank?” I explained what Irv Rogers had told me and Mom couldn’t believe it.
“That cheap weasel,” she said as she reached over, grabbed a shot glass, and poured herself a shot of whiskey and downed it. “All this time he could have afforded to live comfortably on his own. I guess he got the last laugh.”
I then took the letter that Dad had written me and passed it over to her so she could read it. She slipped her reading glasses on and read the letter a few times. She looked over at me and could see I was feeling guilty.
“Travis,” she said as she took my hand, “don’t feel guilty about the way things played out. Your father chose his path in life, and you chose yours. He could have reached out to you at any time, but he didn’t. Goodness knows he had his faults – lots of them – but deep down I know he loved you and was proud of you. He was just too stubborn to ever say it to you.”
“Well I was too stubborn to ever come and see him,” I said as I took another long sip of beer.
“You had to live your life, Travis. For you and for Abby. He didn’t know you were taking care of her on your own. Hell, we lived in the same small town together for years, and I never ran into him more than once or twice from the time you left until the day he died. He never said one word to me either. He’d tip that ratty old hat he always wore to me and just walk on by.”
I had forgotten about the ratty old hat. Dad always wore this tweed cap around town. It always looked out of place on him, but he loved it. It had lasted forever, but now that Mom mentioned it, I hadn’t seen it in the house. It was then I remembered the picture.
“I also found this in the truck he had in the garage,” I said to her as I handed her the picture.
“Your father had a truck?” she said loudly, causing the waitresses setting the tables for dinner to turn around and take a look at her. “Why did he have a truck?” she asked me. “He never drove anywhere.”
Mom took a close look at the picture.
“That’s Emma Winters,” she said to me without batting an eye.
“Who is that? ” I asked her. She continued to study the picture a bit longer before she looked up at me and handed it back to me.
“That’s the waitress who worked here that night…” she paused then restarted, “It’s who I caught your father fooling around with in the back room,” she said abruptly.
“Wasn’t she about my age?” I asked her.
“She was little older than you,” she said to me as she took the picture and looked at it again. “She was nineteen when she was working here. Out of high school, didn’t go to college and wanted a full-time job. She was a very pretty girl, smart, funny and a great waitress. I really liked her. Apparently, your father did too. I had no idea he kept seeing her. I’ve seen her around town, but not much. I think she was working a few towns over now, in Sterling. This looks like it was taken just a few months ago.”
“Do you think,” I hesitated a bit before finishing the thought. “Do you think the girl was Dad’s?”
Mom looked hard at the picture again. “I guess she could be,” she said to me. “She looks about Abby’s age. That would mean it was about two years after you left here, so your father was about forty. It sure could be his daughter. There is a bit of a resemblance in the face.”
Now I had even more to consider. Dad led this secret life, and I had a half-sister out there somewhere the same age as my daughter. I finished my beer and rubbed my forehead with my hand.
“This is a lot for you to take in one day, I know Travis,” Mom said to me calmly.
“Oh, wait, there’s more,” I said to her.
“What else could there be?” she said throwing her arms up in the air. “It’s not enough to drop all this, but on top of your stuff I have had two of my bartenders up and quit today. Seems as though they ran off with each other last night and I am left high and dry for a bartender on a Friday night.”
“Can I finish before we get to your bartender soap opera?” I said, cutting her off.
“Go ahead,” Mom said as she leaned herself against the back of the bar.
“Abby showed me a picture she took with you last night here at the restaurant,” I said to her.
“Yes, one of the waitresses took it for us with her phone. What about it?”
“She showed it to me today. I saw Sophie sitting behind you in the picture. Is she in town?”
Mom smiled at me and leaned forward. “As a matter of fact she is,” she said to me coyly.
“Is she just visiting someone? Her mother maybe?” I was sitting there waiting with anticipation. Mom came around from behind the bar and stood next to me as I sat on the stool.
“Ruth Ingram moved out of Canon years ago,” she said to me. “No, she isn’t visiting anyone. Sophie is the eighth-grade English teacher here. She has been for years.”
I was stunned. “And you never bothered to share this information with me before?”
“You could have come to town anytime you wanted to Travis and found out for yourself. You’re the one that stayed away. You never asked me about her, so I figured you weren’t interested.”
I didn’t know what to say next.
“Is she… is she seeing anyone?” I said, sounding like I was back in high school now.
“Sophie? Now let me think,” she said as she brought her right hand up to her chin, stroking it like she was studying a painting to figure out what it meant. “Pretty girl like that, you’d have to think she was seeing someone, wouldn’t you?” I knew she was just messing with me at this point.
“Can you just answer me, please?” I begged her.
“Honestly, I don’t see her that much. But when I do see her, she is never with a man.” Mom wiped the bar a bit with her dishrag.
My mind was racing again with all the information it was processing. Dad, Emma Winters, this girl, the house, what to do with Abby, my life and career, and now, Sophie. I wasn’t sure I could take much more.
“Now that I have answered your questions,” Mom mentioned, “ Perhaps you can help me out with something.”
“Sure Mom,” I told her as I stood up from the bar stool.
“I need a bartender for tonight,” she said as she handed me an apron and the dishrag.
“Mom, you don’t want me behind the bar,” I said, handing the items back to her.
“Why not?” she said to me. “You used to bartend before you got certified as a fireman. Even then you always bartended their parties and fundraisers. You could do it with your eyes closed. Besides,” she said with a smile, “you owe me at least this one.”
It was hard to argue with that, but I was still reluctant to do it. Mom could see the resistance on my face.
“You never know,” she said to me in a sing-song voice as she started to walk towards the kitchen. “Sophie may come back in tonight,” she turned to face me as she bumped the swinging door to the kitchen open with her backside.
I put the apron on and went to the bar to familiarize myself with the setup, hoping it would be a good night.