Audrey returned home fifteen minutes before Piper’s bus was supposed to drop her off from school. After an exhausting day of Skyping with her business partner, grocery shopping, then meeting at Annabelle’s to discuss her nursery, Audrey was ready to drop with a glass of wine. Or maybe the whole bottle.
Except the last time she’d done that, she’d ended up lip-locked with a man who sent her hormones into hyperdrive. So maybe wine was a bad idea.
She had just enough time to unload all the groceries, which may or may not have included extra cookie dough ice cream and a jar of marshmallow cream. Just for those nights when the urge to slip in Cameron’s back door was so strong that her fingers actually itched. Yeah, ice cream was a totally suitable substitute.
But the ice cream would have to do, because it was becoming increasingly hard to keep her cool around him. To keep her sly glances to herself. To control the trembling of her fingers whenever he was in the room. Talk about a massive crush. Audrey couldn’t remember the last time she’d crushed this hard.
The bus pulled in front of Cameron’s house just as Audrey was walking to the curb. Three kids got off, each running off in different directions. Then Audrey’s heart lifted at the sight of Piper, whose hair had become unraveled from the two braids she’d spent twenty minutes on that morning. Piper bounded down the steps with all the energy and enthusiasm of a six-year-old. She turned and waved to the bus driver, causing Audrey’s heart to pinch even tighter. Her hair was a mess of baby-fine waves, from the braids. There was a grass stain on her left knee and a funky-looking green spot on the bottom of her pink sweater. Despite the mess, Piper was just about the sweetest thing Audrey had seen all day. She’d missed the squirt like crazy.
But as Piper hopped off the bus, Audrey fought back the wave of sorrow, because Dianna should have been the one to greet her daughter after school. She should have braided Piper’s hair and done all the school shopping and packed Piper’s lunch with a note to have an awesome day. But she wasn’t, and Audrey was assaulted again by the unfairness of the situation. There would be no family dinner around a table tonight, no mother to help her with her homework or tuck her in.
But she has you.
Audrey lifted her chin, determined not to let the thoughts show on her face.
“Hey, kiddo.” Audrey picked the girl up, backpack and all, and hugged her little body close. She hadn’t expected to miss Piper so much.
Piper jumped up and down when Audrey released her. “I got on green today.”
Audrey took Piper’s hand and led her to the guesthouse. “Green?”
“Ms. Matthews has three colors on the wall. Green, yellow, and red,” Piper explained. “Red is for when you’re bad, and Carter got on red because he talked during story time. But I didn’t. I got on green because I didn’t talk.”
Audrey grinned down at her as the entered the house. “Of course, because you tried your best, right?”
Piper nodded and dropped her backpack on the floor. “Yep.” She turned and blinked up at Audrey. “I have to go to the bathroom.”
“Okay, you know where it is,” Audrey responded, even though she knew how Piper was going to respond.
She shook her head, sending her soft waves around her shoulders. “You have to come with me, remember?”
Audrey lifted a brow and jabbed a hand on her hip. “Piper, we’ve talked about this. You need to start using the bathroom by yourself. How do you go at school?”
“I just go with a friend.”
Audrey pondered her options, knowing she didn’t have many with a tenacious six-year-old. She blew out a breath. “I’ll walk you to the bathroom, but I’m not staying in there with you.”
Piper grabbed Audrey’s hand. “But I’m scared.”
The inflection of emotion in the girl’s voice tugged harder on Audrey’s heartstrings. She squatted and took both of Piper’s small hands in her own. “Honey, the bathroom isn’t a scary place. Why are you afraid of it?” she asked, even though she knew the answer. Ever since Dianna had passed away, Piper had been terrified of using a bathroom by herself.
“Just am,” Piper said in a low voice. She averted her gaze to her scuffed boots and sniffed.
Audrey resisted the urge to pull Piper into her arms and tell her it was okay. Just give her a little reassurance, that she wasn’t alone. Then she remembered Cameron’s words about being too fussy, so she held back.
Instead she settled on resting her hands on Piper’s tiny shoulders. “Sweetie, you’re going to have to get over your fear of the bathroom. I won’t always be here to go with you.”
“Why can’t you?” Piper questioned.
Oh, God, not this again. They’d had this discussion a few times, and Audrey thought Piper understood. She knew Piper wanted Audrey to stay, but how was she supposed to respond to that?
“You know why, Piper,” Audrey answered. “Because I have to go home eventually.”
Piper blinked at her. “But why can’t this be your home?”
Yeah, Audrey. Why?
“Because my home is in Boulder.” Yeah, great answer.
“But why can’t this be your home?” she asked again. “Don’t you like it here?”
If only it were that simple…“Of course I like it here. I love Blanco Valley, and I love being here with you. But my work is in Boulder. I can’t just leave my business.”
Piper scratched the side of her face. “Why can’t you move your business here?”
Okay, she was running out of reasonable excuses here. “Because…” Shit, because why? “Because I have a business partner who I work with, and I can’t leave her to do all the work herself.”
Piper blinked again, and Audrey knew she didn’t understand. And why would she? Her world consisted of cartoons, a stuffed cat, and jelly beans.
“Can she move down here?” Piper asked with all the confidence of someone who thought they’d figured it out.
“No, honey, she can’t. Now how about we use the bathroom now?” Audrey pushed, desperate to put an end to the line of questioning. Piper could be relentless when she put her mind to it, as were all kids, Audrey imagined. But it broke her heart to see the confusion written all over her sweet face. Audrey wanted to do everything in her power to make Piper happy, to give her the stable home she’d once had with Dianna. She feared that when she left, she’d rock the girl’s world all over again.
They used the toilet, while Audrey waited in the hall, giving Piper an extra reminder to wash her hands.
“Is Cameron here? I wanna tell him about how I got on green today.” Piper skipped out of the bathroom and headed for the kitchen.
Audrey followed her, knowing the girl was hungry. “Nope, he’s still at work. But he’ll be home around dinnertime, and I’m sure he’d love to hear about your day.”
As Audrey made Piper a snack of sliced cheese with crackers and grapes, Audrey questioned her own words. How much interest would Cameron really have? Okay, she knew she wasn’t giving him enough credit, but her own protectiveness for Piper was coming out and landing square on Cameron. She needed him to be more involved in Piper’s life. More important, Piper needed him to be more involved, to know her schedule and her teacher’s name and how to pack her lunch.
She made a note to talk to him about it later and went about making Piper’s snack.
They spent the remainder of the afternoon hanging around the guesthouse; then Audrey took the time to go through Piper’s school folder while Piper went to the backyard to play. There were a half dozen forms Cameron needed to sign.
Daylight slowly faded into twilight, and Cameron pulled his rumbling Camaro into the driveway around six thirty.
Her traitorous heart did a triple beat when she watched him unfold his long legs from the driver’s seat. Piper skipped toward him, but Audrey remained behind the screen door, grateful for the cover so she had a moment to compose herself. He already saw too much when he caught her watching him. She didn’t need to be giving the man any advantages.
Lord knew he had too many.
Piper jumped up and down on two feet as she followed Cameron to the front door. Audrey couldn’t be sure, but she thought maybe he’d glanced in her direction as though wondering where she was.
Before she could consider it too long, her cell phone rang. Her stomach clenched when she spotted her brother’s name on the display. The only time he called was to talk about her mother’s disappearance and the case that detectives were still working on. However, as much as Audrey wanted to hear something about what had happened to her mother, she wasn’t in the mood to talk to him. Their conversations made Audrey long for the time when she and Paul could laugh and tease and play. Now they just passed along information, like two coworkers who occasionally saw each other at a staff meeting. She allowed the call to go to voice mail. If Paul had important information to relay, she could call him back.
It wasn’t supposed to be this way. Life wasn’t supposed to be this way. At least her life wasn’t. When she’d been a kid, she’d received an unreasonable amount of satisfaction planning her future. Her career, husband, kids, and all that. So far, nothing had worked out the way she’d dreamed all those years ago. Everything was upside down and constantly changing, and the element of the unknown placed a throbbing tension in the back of her skull.
Mom gone. Best friend gone. A brother she barely talked to. A father who was emotionally unavailable. A career that was finally thriving, and one that she loved. But was that what she’d been reduced to? That woman who threw herself into her job because she had nothing else going for her? No husband waiting for her, no kids to tuck in at night? No big, overly loud Christmases with family bustling around the kitchen and nephews and nieces running down the halls?
And then there was Cameron. He was everything she’d once wanted. He had a good, stable job. He was a homeowner. Not to mention how softhearted he was with Piper. Smart. Good-looking…
Oh, who was she kidding? The man gave new meaning to “good-looking.” It was like looking at Chris Hemsworth and thinking eh.
But Audrey had enough experience to know life was more about a checklist. It was about feelings and instinct. Spontaneity and living. Not simply going from point A to point B. Sometimes Audrey felt like she’d become one of those people.
Only thing was all her instincts about Cameron had been screaming at her since day one.
Be careful with this one.
He’s just like the others who’ve hurt you.
Audrey pulled in a breath as she lifted her head and spotted Cameron on the back porch watching her. The look on his face was peculiar. His brows were knitted in a way that she thought maybe he wanted to go to her, but for some reason he held himself back.
Don’t, she wanted to say to him.
“Everything okay?” he called.
“Yeah.” Audrey stood from the step, because she needed to do something with her nervous energy.
Audrey reached the top of the steps, but Cameron hadn’t moved from his spot behind the railing. He had one lean hip pressed against the wood, his hands folded over his impressive chest. That was another thing Audrey noticed about him. The man leaned a lot, as though casual were his middle name. As though he had all the time in the world. He moved with an easy, casual grace of someone who was confident in his own skin. And yet he always watched her with an intensity that made her want to squirm.
“I see Piper found you,” she said.
Cameron surprised her by smiling. The action had been unexpected and sent Audrey’s hormones into overdrive. “Yeah, she’s been telling me about her day for the past half an hour. Some kid named Gavin kept poking her in the shoulder with a purple crayon and was sent to the time-out chair.”
Audrey smiled along with him because it was impossible not to smile when talking about Piper. “I think she had a good day.”
A look of concern flashed across Cameron’s face. “Were you worried she wouldn’t?”
“How could I not worry about that?”
He lifted one shoulder. “I guess you can’t really help it, can you?”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing.”
She took a step toward him and tried not to notice how the man towered over her. “No, there was something there. You had a disapproving tone.”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Yes, you did. As though I can’t help but to fuss over her, as you put it before.”
He blew out a breath. “I only meant because you care about her. Not everything has a double meaning, Audrey.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh,” he replied.
“You know, if she’s ever bothering you, you can just send her back to me,” she said.
Cameron’s head tilted as though he didn’t understand the question. “Bothering me?”
Audrey tried not to let his tone get under her skin. She had the feeling she’d insulted him. “Yeah, you know. Piper can be a lot if you’re not used to her.”
“Meaning?”
Audrey picked at a splinter on the wood railing. “I just don’t want her to wear you down before I leave.”
“Wear me down?”
She blew out a breath. “Why do you keep repeating everything I say?”
“Because I’m trying to figure out where you’re going with this,” he told her.
Where was she going? Audrey wasn’t sure she knew. The only thing she was certain of was that seeing Cameron look almost concerned for her had thrown her off balance. Audrey didn’t like being off balance, despite the fact that it was a permanent condition around this man. So she’d done the only thing she knew how to do.
She was trying to get her bearings back, to get her surroundings back under control. Usually it worked, but around Cameron, her normal methods always seemed to fail her.
She shook her head, knowing Cameron wouldn’t understand. “Forget it. So Piper got off the bus at three thirty,” she told him.
Cameron blinked as though trying to process the change in subject. “Okay.”
Audrey nodded and watched him. Not even a flicker of interest. “Don’t you think that’s something you should know?”
“And you just told me,” he said without skipping a beat.
“Yes, but what if I hadn’t told you? How would you know when she got home? And who will be here to meet her after I leave?”
Cameron held his hands up. “Okay, hold on. Why don’t you tell me what’s really going on?”
Audrey blinked. “What do you mean?” Except she knew exactly what he meant.
He took a step closer to her so that his hand rested next to hers on the railing. Close enough to feel the heat from his body, even though the temperature was in the low sixties. “I mean why you’re so hell-bent on picking a fight with me.”
“I’m not,” she lied. “I just need to make sure we’re on the same page—”
He stepped closer. “Audrey…”
“How are you supposed to know these things if I don’t tell you—”
“Audrey,” he murmured again as he placed his hand over hers on the railing.
His tone stopped her cold, and she dropped her attention to his hand, so much bigger than hers, cradling it with a soft yet firm touch. His hand felt good. Like warmth blooming across her belly, toe-curling goodness. Which begged the question…if his warm palm felt this good with just a simple touch, what would it feel like if he were to really touch her?
“Holy John Galliano,” she muttered to herself.
One side of Cameron’s mouth kicked up. “Christ, don’t start that again.”
“I can’t help it. You’re so…” Her voice trailed off because she didn’t know quite how to explain Cameron, especially to the man himself. Actually, that wasn’t true. She had a pretty good idea which words to use. Smokin’ hot. Seriously sexy.
Yeah, no way was she saying that to him.
The grip on her hand tightened. “So what?”
Audrey opened her mouth, then snapped it shut when her brain almost malfunctioned and forced her to spew out obscenities, like smoldering and tight-as-shit-abs. No reason to balloon the man’s ego any bigger than it already was.
“Don’t hold back, Audrey,” he said to her. “Tell me what you really think.”
How was she supposed to do that when the thumb stroking back and forth over her hand was short-circuiting her wires?
She blew out a breath. “Karl Lagerfeld.”
“You’re going to have to start using your words, Audrey,” he teased.
“You’re just…” she started. “Too much.”
“Too much,” he repeated.
She couldn’t help the smile that curled her lips. “There you go again repeating my words.”
He shook his head. “And there you go again saying things that don’t make sense.”
Well, it made sense to her. She just didn’t know how to explain it to him. At least other than I want to jump your bones and bang like rabbits.
“You’re too much for me,” she blurted out.
She expected him to pull back. Instead he grinned. A big, sexy, you-know-you-want-me smile that had shivers skating down her spine.
“That wasn’t meant to be funny,” she scolded.
“I’m not laughing,” he said around his shit-eating grin.
“Kind of seems like it,” she argued.
His thumb continued back and forth over her knuckles. “Yeah, it’s kind of funny.”
Lovely to know her torment was so hilarious to him.
He leaned even closer, so that his nose was a breath away from her. She could feel his breath, hot on her skin. She resisted the urge to close her eyes and lean in to him, for just a moment to feel his warmth and strength. Maybe tuck her head in the curve of his neck…
“Because you want me,” he stated. As though he were giving her a weather report.
Why was he not as off balance as she was? Why was she the only one who seemed to be affected by…whatever it was between them? The thought left Audrey feeling cold and treading in familiar waters from every other guy she’d been involved with.
“You have a high opinion of yourself,” she countered, because that was easier than admitting he was right. Cameron straightened and chuckled. “Yeah, okay.” He gave her hand a tug and led her toward the sliding glass door. “Let’s get some dinner.”
She followed him blindly because his hand felt so damn good wrapped around hers. Protective and fitting. Like their fingers belonged tangled up in each other. The thought startled Audrey as much as it created a warm bubble around her heart.
Just as she was about to follow him through the door, he surprised her by stopping and pinning her against the door frame. Her brain screamed at her to push him back, to slap away the hands that were creeping over her hips and tugging her to him so that she could feel all the hard goodness beneath his athletic pants.
“But let’s get one thing straight, Audrey,” he breathed in her ear.
Why was he always whispering in her ear? And why didn’t she have the compulsion to stop him?
“Soon you’re going to stop saying those ridiculous names,” his soft voice said.
Her eyes shuttered closed when his mouth traced the outer shell of her ear. And then her quaking breath turned into a gasp when his lips oh so gently touched the sensitive spot on her neck.
God, the man knew how to use his mouth. Cameron was persistent and tender at the same time, knowing how to draw out the suspense of just kiss me already until Audrey wanted to sink her teeth into the bulk of his shoulder.
“And you’re going to say mine instead.”
The confidence in his voice was almost as unnerving as the reaction her body had to his. She could feel the bulk of his thighs against hers all the way to his hard chest teasing the tips of her breasts.
Finally she gave in to the compulsion to lean into him and press her lips to his jaw. But the moment was cut short and Audrey was left cold when Cameron pulled away and lifted her chin with the tip of his index finger.
“Soon, Audrey.”