Chapter 18

“You talked to my dad?” Joey hadn’t known about that.

Felix nodded. “I was seventeen. Not as young as you, but not yet an adult. I was a stupid kid who believed his own hype. And when it mattered, I feel like the adults in my life let me down. My mother only wanted what looked best for the family. Not what I needed.” He just looked at her. “She told me she’d never recognize Brandon as my son. And if I pursued this, she wouldn’t see me either.”

Joey didn’t know what to say.

“But I couldn’t live with myself anymore.” He groaned. “I went to school, got my fancy law degree, handled big-name divorce cases, ’cause, yeah, I finally did something I wanted. Family, not corporate, law. And I saw so many kids in a bad situation because of their parents. Rich assholes who fought about money, never about what really mattered.”

“Wow. You sound like the boy I once knew.”

He gave her a sad smile. “Took me a long time to grow a pair.”

“You said it.” She smirked.

He laughed, and a sense of camaraderie enveloped them. Until Joey reminded herself that this was about more than Felix apologizing.

He must have seen her wariness because he hurried to continue. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for everything I put you through.” He hesitated. “I brought you a check. Not to pay you off or insult you or to insinuate that money could ever make up for what I did to you. I brought the check to support my son. The child support you should have had all those years ago. But I’m afraid if I hand it to you, you might slap me or tell me to fuck off again.”

“I might.” She didn’t know about the money, but that he’d finally acknowledged he’d been wrong alleviated the buried anger she’d had for so long.

Felix sighed. “Was it really bad, Joey? I know the kids were cruel, but your parents were smart to take you out of school. Were they supportive? You mentioned they gave you a hard time. What was it like?”

He seemed sincerely to want to know, so she told him. “Dad was furious. Mom was disappointed. I swear she looked like she wanted to cry for the entire nine months I carried Brandon. Even after he was born, my parents treated me like a leper. Oh, Mom would sneak in and cuddle him, but other than that, I was on my own. At first I just stayed at home, working toward my GED, taking care of the baby. Always aware I needed to be independent and ‘take care of my own messes.’” She sighed. “They were so mad and disappointed. It really hurt. But I had food, shelter, clothes. Brandon didn’t need for anything, and he has a great pediatrician—still.”

“Good, for Brandon, I mean. I’m sorry about the rest.”

She shrugged. “I was partly responsible for it all. I’m not that naive. I could have said no, but I didn’t. Anyway, it took a while, years, but my parents settled down. Mom’s over it all and so in love with Brandon, he’s like her personal mini-me. She dotes on him, and he loves her. Dad is still judgmental, still makes me feel like a fifteen-year-old who should have said no. But he loves me in his own way.” Probably. “I managed to get a bachelor’s degree in business. Put myself through school while working and taking care of Brandon. I just got a promotion to manager, and I’m thinking about starting an offshoot of the floral business with my boss’s okay.”

Felix smiled. “That’s awesome. Amazing. You’re so much better than me, Joey. You had no one to help—well, your parents, but we both know that wasn’t easy. And you still managed to come out on top. I’m proud of you. It might not mean much coming from me, but I know our son will be a much better person for having been raised by you and not me.” He shook his head. “I might have a fancy law degree and some money to go with the stupid name, but I’m just me.”

“Odd, you never seemed so down on yourself when we were together.”

“I hid it from everyone. My mother and father pretty much let me know they loved Dan more than me. I was the second son in case he didn’t work out,” he said drily. “Dan does the family proud, so they can ignore me for being the black sheep of the family.”

“Black sheep?”

“My GPA was lower than Dan’s. I’m also a divorced man in his midtwenties with an illegitimate child. I might as well be stricken from the family Bible.”

“Ouch.” She felt for him, but part of her held back from showing open compassion. Was all his woe-is-me stuff just a ploy to make her relax so he could steal Brandon away? Hell, he was a high-priced lawyer. He could probably find a way to wrestle her son away from her. Wasn’t he more successful, could give Brandon more than she could?

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

She didn’t want to play games. “I’m sorry for all you went through. I’m glad you apologized, because I deserved it. But I won’t let you take Brandon from me.”

He sighed. “I knew it wouldn’t be easy to get you to trust me.” He reached into his back pocket and withdrew his wallet. Then he pulled out a check and handed it to her. “I know this isn’t much, not for all the years that have gone by, but I’d be thankful if you’d take it.”

She stared at the check and blinked, not sure about all the zeroes. “Felix,” she hissed. “What the heck? This is for thirty thousand dollars.”

He flushed. “I know, not much considering, if you do the math, I’m still in arrears by, like, forty grand. But I want you to have it. I have savings, more for him.”

Panicked, because that was a lot of freaking money that no doubt had strings attached, she pushed the check back to him. “You can’t buy your way into our lives. You can’t have him.”

He put his hand over hers, and the shock of his touch froze her. “Joey, stop.” His voice was low, calm, and the warmth of his palm over hers felt…good. Not smothering, as she would have expected. “This is for Brandon. And you, I’ll be honest. Call it what it is. Guilt money. I’m not trying to buy my way into Brandon’s goodwill. I’m trying to atone for being a complete waste for most of my life.”

She stared into his eyes, wanting but afraid to believe him.

“Go see your lawyer. Take the custody paperwork, my check, and tell him or her everything. Hell, rip up the check. I’ll write you another one. Aside from the money, though, can you just think about letting me see him? I won’t interfere, won’t swing by your work or home to harass you. I just want to meet him.” He swallowed, his eyes looking shiny. “To get to know him. He’s the one good thing I’ve done with my life, Joey. You have to know I don’t want to mess him up.” He laughed and rubbed his eyes. “Shit. I’m not crying. Had something in my eye.”

She stared, so completely turned around she didn’t know what to feel.

“I’m going to go.” He pushed the check and another business card her way. “In case you tore up the card I gave you yesterday,” he teased. “Think about letting me get to know him and him getting to know me. Without my parents or yours involved. Just you and me and him. I promise you I only want to get to know him. Nothing nefarious.”

And with that, the man who spoke as if he’d swallowed a dictionary left.

She stared after him, still in awe that they’d had the conversation they had. Never in a million years would she have expected an apology and thirty thousand dollars. To hell with a conscience or denying she needed the money. Heck yeah, she could use it. And she would, but only if a lawyer gave her the okay.

Now to find someone she could trust to tell her the truth. Someone not connected to her parents or her past.

As she left, with a wave to Elliot, still busy at the counter, she wanted badly to tell someone what had happened. To her bemusement, the person she wanted to talk to wasn’t Becky. It was Lou. What would he make of all this? Would he tell her to trust Felix or to run the other way? As much as he loved his family and protected them, would he encourage Brandon’s father to make amends? Or would he say to protect her son at all costs?

“And he has no idea I have a son.” Joey swore under her breath as she got into the car and sat, clutching the steering wheel. How the heck did she tell Lou she had a son? Now that they’d been going out…well, heck. Only a few weeks? It felt like she’d known him forever. But a few weeks didn’t mean she’d been keeping secrets, just looking out for her boy. Yet she had a feeling Lou wouldn’t take her admission well. Because he’d asked her if there was someone else. Had given her opportunities to disclose the fact that her son existed. She hadn’t.

He also didn’t want children. And she had one she planned on keeping.

She drove home, needing to think. To plan. And to find a way to make everything work for her and Brandon. Daddy’s not so sick anymore, sweetie. And I think…I’d like you to meet him.

* * *

Tuesday afternoon, while Lou made up his time at Webster’s working on Blue Altima’s second cousin, Green Shitty Santa Fe, he joked with the guys. After his talk with J.T. on Sunday, Lou knew the time had come to have a sit-down with Joey, to explain he’d come to care for her—without saying the l-word and scaring her off.

He’d gently coax the truth from her. Or not. He sighed. If she wouldn’t tell him about whatever was bothering her, he’d simply wait. God, he hated himself being such a love-struck pussy, but he was a serious douche in love.

The thought of Joey leaving made him ill.

“Hey, Cortez, what’s with the lemon face?” Johnny asked, palming a screwdriver. “Did Joey finally dump your sorry ass?” He snickered, clearly knowing the opposite to be true. Johnny could be a pain, but he would never deliberately hurt a friend’s feelings if said friend were down and out.

But Lou still hadn’t come close to beating the punk-ass’s darts scores Sunday. “Sorry. Was thinking of the last time Lara asked me out and how sad she was when I turned her down. It’s just…I mean, she’s your woman. Keep her happy, man, and she won’t come to me.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Wasn’t that on Sunday?” Foley asked Sam.

Sam, straight-faced, nodded. “Yep. I heard from Rena that J.T. was there too. Saw the whole sad thing. I wasn’t going to say anything to him until later. You know, in private.”

Johnny stared, wide-eyed, then glared. “You assholes aren’t funny. Lara was with her nieces Sunday.” He gripped the screwdriver tightly. “Lou, you’re a dick. You know that?” He flipped off Sam and Foley. “So are you assholes.”

“Oh, my bad. Must have been a different Lara I was thinking of,” Lou said as he buried his face under the car’s hood once more. “Lemon face this, motherfucker.”

He ignored Johnny’s muttering and Foley and Sam’s self-congratulations and once again thought about how best to talk to Joey about his feelings. She cared for him—a lot. He knew it. Could feel it when they were together. Despite them being new, he understood the difference between fucking and making love, between affection and deeper feelings. Joey wasn’t the type to give herself so completely to just any guy. The fact that she hadn’t been with anyone for a year before Lou said as much.

Man, that kind of commitment blew his mind.

Unless she’d been lying?

A niggle of doubt remained, because he wanted to know what she was hiding.

“Oh, wow. This is awesome. Can I use the drill, Mom? Can I?” Colin McCauley’s enthusiasm made him smile.

Lou straightened from the car and turned to see Colin holding Del’s hand, skipping next to her and dragging her deeper into the garage.

He raised a brow. “Skipping school? Del, you’re such a bad influence.”

She grinned. “Can it, Lou. Colin had a dental appointment. I just thought I’d swing by here to pick up some paperwork before I took him back.”

“And I wanted to miss math.” Colin made a face.

“Shh. That’s our secret. I’m here for pa-per-work. Remember?” Del reminded him.

He grinned. “Oh, right. We’re here for paperwork, Lou.”

Foley chuckled. “Good job, Del. So slick. I’m sure McCauley will never realize you’re teaching the kid to lie.”

Del frowned.

The nice thing about Del marrying into the McCauley clan—they’d gotten a lot of extra business because of it. The McCauleys knew everyone in Seattle, or at least it seemed that way. And now they had even more clients out the ass, because they were the best auto shop in town and because of all Del’s new relatives. Family. He chuckled.

“What are you laughing about, Lou?” Colin asked him and tugged free from Del.

Lou nodded to her. “I’ll watch him. Well, Colin, I’m laughing because you McCauleys seem to know everybody. And now we have so much business, your mom keeps us chained here overnight working on cars. She whips us, won’t let us eat or drink—”

Del thumbed at the break room. “Hello? New coffee machine in there.”

“Yeah,” Foley cut in on the action. “She even forced me and Sam to work so much for so long, our girlfriends almost broke up with us.”

“Really?” Colin’s eyes grew wide.

“Yep.” Sam nodded and crossed to them. “She’s so mean.”

“Oh for fu—fudge’s sake,” Del snarled. “They got in trouble with their girlfriends for spending too much time at Ray’s. So a little bird told me over drinks this past weekend.”

“That was no little bird,” Johnny said with a smirk. “That was Cyn.”

“A big bird.” Colin nodded, having met the towering Cyn. “Not Big Bird. I mean, a tall, pretty red bird.”

Foley grinned. “Yeah, she’d like that. Not a cardinal or anything. More like a hawk.”

“Who digests entrails,” Johnny said.

“Bloody guts and little boys,” Sam added with a scary smile.

Lou couldn’t stop laughing.

“And who eats micey men for breakfast.” Del shook her head. “I’m so telling her you said that.”

Colin was laughing as well. Lou knew for a fact the kid was as sly and clever as Johnny. “What have you been up to besides the dentist, Colin? I hear you’re good at soccer.”

“I am,” he boasted while Del tried not to smile. “I scored three goals on Saturday. Brandon and Todd assisted. It was awesome.”

“So you have little assistants now? You going pro on us, keeping your minions tight so they can keep you scoring in the millions?” Foley asked, deliberately sounding confused. “I mean, you’re a McCauley. I shouldn’t be surprised.”

“Ha, ha, Foley.” Colin did an unconscious impression of his dad, fisting his hands on his hips as he turned to confront the goliath. “They aren’t my minions. They’re my friends. Todd Bennett and Brandon Reeves. That’s who helped me.”

Del’s sudden tension penetrated at the same time as the name Reeves did.

Lou blinked. “Reeves?”

Del shrugged, but he could see her pretending not to be so uncomfortable. “Yeah. You know Joey Reeves? My friend and your, ah, friend? She’s Brandon’s mom.”

He blinked. “What?”

The rest of the guys suddenly grew super busy as they darted back to their respective projects.

“Um, Lou. Could you come with me for a minute?” Del asked. “Colin, you—”

“He can help Sam organize his tools,” Foley offered. “God knows he needs the help.”

Sam glared at him but motioned to Colin. “Yeah. I’m a mess. Can you help me out?” In an overloud loud whisper, he added, “And play with the lift a little.”

Colin whooped and raced over to Sam.

Lou had a hard time processing Joey’s big secret. “A kid?”

“Come on, Lou.” Del marched over and dragged him with her into her office.

Once inside, she shut the door. “So I gather she didn’t tell you about Brandon yet.”

“Yet?” She’d been going to tell him something the other night before his mother and sisters had interrupted. Had she been about to explain about her son? A son. A boy. A child.

Man, that put a whole new spin on everything.

“Sit down.” Del’s gentle voice.

He whipped his gaze to hers. “You knew?”

“Dude, I’m Colin’s mom. He plays soccer every day. And Joey’s my friend. Yeah, I knew.”

“You never said anything.” He felt betrayed and couldn’t have said why. Joey had never told him she didn’t have a child. But… He never dated single moms. Ever. Because they reminded him of his mother and her inability to care for her children when dating.

He never wanted to be that guy who came between a mother and son. Had he been without knowing?

“Wasn’t my place to say anything.” Del leaned back against her desk. “I knew you had a thing for her. But you two weren’t dating. Then you were, and you seemed so happy. Who cares if she has a son? She’s not looking for a baby daddy.”

“How do you know?”

She sighed. “If she was, she’d have told you by now. You’re hot, you got money. And you’re clearly into the girl. Has she tried to get you to buy her anything for the kid? Legos, toys, a college fund, maybe?”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” He snorted. A college fund?

“Yeah, well, don’t you be ridiculous. She didn’t tell you about the boy. So what? She’s not hiding him or anything. Jesus, the whole McCauley clan was there Saturday. J.T. too. We all know who Brandon belongs to. Joey was there, cheering for him.”

“Wait. J.T. was there on Saturday?” And hadn’t said a goddamn thing on Sunday when Lou had poured his heart out to the guy. J.T. knew Lou’s stance on women with children. Damn it.

“Yeah. So was my dad. Joey’s parents, hell, anyone with a kid in the greater Seattle area seemed to be slumming around the soccer field.” Del groaned. “Lou, don’t do this.”

“Don’t do what?” No wonder Joey had been so good with Rosie. She’d had a lot of practice.

“Don’t fuck this up. You’ve been happier the past weeks with Joey than you ever have. Of all the guys in the garage, you’re the most normal.” At his raised brow, she snapped, “You know what I mean. The most stable. You have a great family life, you respect women, and you’re the most talented paint guy I know. And no, I am not comparing you to J.T., so don’t go there. He does people, you do cars. No comparison.”

Actually, there was. But Lou knew she couldn’t in good conscience choose him over her brother. “Your point?”

“I can see the wheels turning in your tiny brain. Telling you that Joey being a mom is a BFD.” A big fuckin’ deal.

“You think it isn’t? Del, you married Mike and Colin. You know what I’m talking about.”

“Duh. I know that. I just meant you need to not overthink it and go with the flow. She’s a sweetheart and a hell of a mom. And she’s young. Like, I did the math. She must have had Brandon when she was still in high school. Can’t have been easy, but her kid is one of the nicest boys I’ve met. And I’ve met a ton of kids since getting shackled with Colin.” Her big grin made her so much more than a pretty woman with tats and piercings. Del was beautiful in her love for her family.

“I want to paint you like that.”

“What?” She blinked.

“All in love and shit. You glow, you know that?”

She turned bright red. “Shut up and get out of my office. And remember what I said. Be the normal, non-freak of the garage when it comes to your girlfriend.”

“Sure, sure. Still glowing.” He slowly rose, inwardly feeling like an old man and still reeling from the news about Joey.

“Out.”

He left and returned to work.

“You good, man?” Sam asked.

“Fine. Just surprised is all.” Understatement of the year.

“Okay. If you need to talk, Mr. Emotional is by the Accord.”

“Hey,” Johnny yelled, buried under said Accord. “But he’s right. I’m here for you, Lou. A man of experience, wisdom, and emotional drivel.”

“More talky-talky. Great,” Lou muttered and lost himself in work. But he knew the time had come for a major sit-down with Joey, one he didn’t welcome because he didn’t know how it would end.