Frank
I’m so hungover, I might still be drunk. Though, chances are good that I’m just falling to pieces. When I saw Bree’s shoe in Sarah’s hand, my heart cracked in two. There’s no way she’s going to believe that Bree showed up on my doorstep the day she got me fired, pushed her way into my apartment, only for me to kick her right back out again. That’s a special kind of crazy even I can’t wrap my head around yet.
If I can’t believe it, and I was here, then why in the world would Sarah believe me? It’s so much easier to think I got drunk and fucked a woman I can’t stand on the day my life came tumbling down.
“Please tell me what happened.” The hurt in Sarah’s eyes sets fire to the rage inside me. She hasn’t even heard the story and has already cast her judgement on me.
“I had no reason to be nice to you, you know that?” I spit the words in her face and turn away, so I don’t have to watch the effect they have on her. On some level, I know I’m self-destructing. I know I’m ruining whatever this is that’s growing between us. She’ll never look at me the same again.
And maybe that’s for the best.
Maybe I’m not the man I thought I was.
Maybe she’s better off without my kind of chaos in her life, especially when she’s just now climbing out of her own chaos. If she goes back to Brookside now, she can continue rebuilding a life with her family. She can heal all the wounds on her heart and finally put down the baggage she’s been carrying around. There’s nothing but instability for her if she stays with me.
“What do you mean?” Sarah’s voice is small. Tight. It cracks on the tension in her throat.
I whirl, acting without thinking. “I mean, you were a mess. Who sets off across the country without enough money to make sure they can get back home? Who quits their job and abandons their family? Believe me, those questions were going through my head from the get go, but I gave you the benefit of the doubt. I thought, hey, this woman might have some very good reasons for her ridiculous choices.”
Sarah steps back, anger eating her sadness. Good. I can deal with anger. It’s her sorrow that’ll break me.
“And then, right after you con me into paying for your car repairs, I find out you’re a drug addict.”
“Con you…? A drug addict? Is that what you think of me?”
“It’s the truth, isn’t it? Hiding your pain behind medication? Drinking even though you know you shouldn’t? Tell me the truth, you were fucked up when you ran that red light, weren’t you?”
Sarah turns away. “I don’t know what you want from me.”
“I want the truth!”
“Fine!” Her body trembles with emotion. “I was medicated. Is that what you want to hear?”
Her anger spurs me on. I’m destroying something beautiful, but what can I say? Drunk Frank is a miserable asshole and she will be so much better off if she leaves. “And I fell for it hook, line, and sinker, didn’t I? The pretty woman? The damsel in distress?”
“What are you talking about?”
“I got you a job. I took you in. I paid for your fucking plane tickets back to Ohio!”
“And I told you that you didn’t have to! My God, Frank! What’s going on with you?”
“I don’t know, Sarah. Why don’t you tell me? You know Bree is crazy. You know I’ve never wanted anything to do with her. But now that I’m broke and have nothing to offer you, you just need that—” I wave a hand at the shoe on the floor “—as an excuse to walk out on me.”
“Really.” Sarah purses her lips. “Except you know very well that I don’t need an excuse to leave. I just leave. The fact that I’m still here speaks volumes, as does the fact that you won’t tell me how that stupid shoe ended up on the floor of your apartment.”
“You know what? I don’t have space in my life for more chaos. I need you to leave.” I point at the door. “Actually, I need you to do more than just leave right now. I need you to leave permanently.” I stomp into the bedroom and pull all of her stuff out of my closet and shove it into her bag.
She follows me, tears wavering in her eyes. “Don’t do this.”
I don’t answer her. I can’t think over the roaring in my head. The poison in my system.
“Frank…”
“Jesus Christ woman! Stop saying my name! Just get this shit and go. I don’t have time for you.” I slide the bag across the floor and stare her down.
She doesn’t move, doesn’t say anything, just stands there looking at me with so much hurt and worry and confusion, that my rage overflows.
“Fine,” I say, speaking before I even know what I’m going to say. “I slept with her. Is that what you want to hear?”
Sarah recoils. She wipes at her tears, then closes her eyes and sucks in her lips. Her chin trembles briefly and then she swallows hard. “I hope you’re proud of yourself,” she says as she bends to grab the bag. Without another word, Sarah turns on her heel and walks out of my life.