Chapter 6
There wasn’t a single spot in Josh’s apartment where Delaney felt comfortable. Every room reminded her that the man who’d given her the most incredible experience would never be able to forgive her for her actions.
Actions that were for nothing, thanks to Liam.
“I want to go home,” she said, staring at Josh while he sat on the sofa, tapping away on his phone. “You can’t expect me to just sit here with you.”
“I can, and I do.” He didn’t look at her. He’d barely looked at her over the last few hours between collecting her things and talking with his Trooper buddies, either in a hushed tone or in the other room. “Still no messages on your phone,” he said as he picked it up from the table, then tossed it back. “They should have responded to you telling them that since there was an eyewitness to the beating, you couldn’t pin it on me, but that you still had the recording.”
“But that’s a lie. You said what little was there, you deleted. You did get rid of it, didn’t you?”
He glanced over the phone, tilting his head. “Eat your salad,” he said. “Viv didn’t have to bring it to you.”
“Thanks for the reminder.” She crossed her arms and looked out the window. The sun still burned bright over the lake. Boats hummed down the shoreline on what was near a record-high day, or so she’d heard on the afternoon news. No amount of heat outside could surpass the intense rage prickling her skin.
“You haven’t eaten anything all day.”
As if Josh really cared. She continued to pick at the Cobb salad, waiting for night to fall so she could curl up on the sofa and try to sleep or, at the very least, get away from him.
“I just got a text from Tristan. Says our contact in New York City has eyes on your brother.”
“Wonderful,” she said under her breath. “If Craypo doesn’t kill him, I just might, but not until I find out why they picked me. I mean, really. Why me?”
“I’ve been thinking about that, myself.” He shifted, turning in her direction, but she couldn’t face him. “You mentioned you and Liam aren’t that close. Why?”
“Mostly because of the way my brother treated our parents, and then after they died, he continued to be an ass to me.”
“Had he ever been involved in anything criminal?”
“Not that I know of.” She set the salad on the coffee table. “But it seems I don’t know my own brother.”
Josh went to the kitchen, got a couple of beers, then set one down on the coffee table. He leaned against the wall next to the big picture window, still avoiding eye contact. She didn’t blame him. She could barely look at herself in the mirror. Assuming the beer on the table was for her, she lifted it, studying it. Plugging her nose, she took three large gulps.
“From everything you’ve told me, I’m having a hard time buying that Liam turned you into a prost—” He ran a hand over his face. “I didn’t mean that you are—”
“Trust me. I feel like my brother turned me into a whore.”
“You’re not a whore.” He looked at her, his sea-green eyes soft. “You really weren’t faking?”
She let out a dry laugh. “Hard to fake something I’ve never really felt before.”
“Didn’t it feel weird to know the recording was on while we were doing things to each other?”
Heat spread across her checks in a wave of shame, anger, and a splash of desire. “I tried not to think about it,” she admitted. “You made me forget… I guess it was easier because I liked you, which sounds like a bitch move, considering what I was going to do, and that does feel like I was prostituted out.”
“I want to hate you. I even want to hurt you, but then I look at you and see…” He waved his fingers over his own face. “I saw that car the two men were sitting in, parked at the Boardwalk the night we met, as well as the night we played putt-putt. I also saw the same car in the Heritage Inn parking lot the day we went on our picnic. I shouldn’t have left you alone.”
“They would have gotten me after you walked me to the hotel.” She shivered, palming her cheek. “I suspect this would have been worse, and they would have the recording, and I…” She shook her head. “Would have given it to them, making it the second biggest mistake of my life.”
“What was the first?”
“Agreeing to sleep with you in the first place.”
“Ouch.” He sipped his beer.
“Do you know for sure that the device actually recorded us?” she asked. “Did you watch it?”
“Only enough to know it worked,” he said. “Go into the kitchen and crouch down behind the breakfast bar.”
“Why?”
“Just do it.” He pulled his weapon out of his belt, shifting to the other side of the window.
“What’s going on?” she asked, as she crawled behind the counter.
“I think we have company, and not the good kind.”
“Same two from this morning?”
“Nope.” He moved from the big picture window to the smaller one overlooking the parking lot. The song I Can’t Stop The Feeling rang out. “That your phone?”
“Yes,” she said.
“Stay low, but get it. Tell me who it is before you answer.”
Bent over, as she took the five steps to the kitchen table and lifted her phone, staring at an image of her brother while his number flashed across the screen. “It’s Liam.”
“Interesting. Answer it, but put it on speaker.”
“Liam?”
“Delaney? Are you okay?” Her brother’s voice boomed from the speaker.
“Not really,” she said. “How about you?”
“Where are you?”
She looked at Josh, who pointed up in the direction of the hotel.
“In the village of Lake George. Why?” She wasn’t sure what Josh had wanted her to say, but felt better when he nodded as if she’d said the right thing.
“Listen. I don’t have much time, but you’ve got to do what they say.”
“I tried.” She glanced at Josh, who motioned to her to keep talking. “What’s going on, Liam? Who are these people, and why are you with them? They kept showing me pictures of you being beaten and told me they’d kill you—”
“They haven’t hurt me, but they will kill me,” Liam said. “And you, if we don’t do this.”
“What do they want with you?”
Josh kept glancing between the window and her, gun in his hand.
“It doesn’t matter, sis. They will be in touch soon. Just do whatever it is, or we’re both dead.”
With that, the call disconnected.
“Fuck,” Josh muttered. “I think they’re tracking your phone.”
“How do you know?” She tossed the phone on the table as if it were on fire.
“Because our friends down in the parking lot are pointing up here while looking at their phones, which means they know you’re here.” He looked over her shoulder, his lips drawn tight, causing a grim look. “It also means your brother tipped them off with his phone call.”
Balling her fists, she dug her nails into her skin. “So, what are we going to do?”
“We’re going to cut off all communication for a while. Turn off your phone and head toward the stairs to the roof. Make sure you take both my phone and yours. I’ll be right behind you.”
“Why?”
“We’re leaving.” He stuffed his gun into the back of his pants as he turned the lock on the front door.
“I’m not jumping off the roof.”
“There’s a ladder,” he said. “Move. Stay low when you get to the top.”
She didn’t like the change in his tone, nor his short, clipped commands. After powering off her phone, she shoved it, and Josh’s, into her back pockets. Her hands shook as she pushed open the hatch to the rooftop patio. Once her feet landed on the roof, she stayed low, waiting for what seemed like an eternity for Josh to appear. Her pulse pounded in her throat, making it hard to breathe.
“Over there,” he said, pointing to the far end of the patio. “Follow me down the ladder.”
“I don’t like heights.”
He’d already climbed over the side of the building. “Our friends rattled the front door once. I don’t want to be here if they manage to get in.”
Her hands trembled as she gripped the wall and straddled it with her legs. She found the first step with her left foot, then her right foot slipped, and she nearly lost her balance.
“You can do it,” he said softly.
Carefully, but as quickly as she could, she felt her way down the metal ladder attached to the side of the wall.
“You’re going to have to jump now,” he said.
She looked over her shoulder and down at the ground.
“It’s only four feet,” he said. “I’m right here. Come on.”
If she could jump off a cliff, she could do this. Pushing herself from the ladder, she bent her knees, hoping it would ease the impact, but she didn’t need to. He grabbed her waist and eased her to the ground. She took the hand he offered and took off at a run along a narrow path filled with overgrown bushes, some of them scraping painfully against her weakened legs until they came to a clearing near the waterfront, and a dock with his boat.
“Grab a baseball cap from the pocket next to the driver’s seat, and tuck your hair into it. Then sit.”
The boat rolled when she jumped in, sending her to her knees with a thud. The pain ricocheted through her body, rattling her teeth.
“You okay?”
“Yeah.” She crawled to the front of the boat, got the hat, then did what he asked before perching herself in the bucket seat. The feeling of someone watching her sent a cold prickle across her neck, so she hopped off the seat then tucked down in front of it.
“Did you get my phone?” he asked as he started the engine then pushed the throttle down, easing them from the dock.
“I did.” She pulled it out of her pocket, handing it to him with a shaky hand, staying low on the ground.
“That’s my girl,” he said, setting the phone in a holster before putting a cap backward on his head. “You’re going to want to be in the seat. It’s rough today.”
The boat planed off, hitting the choppy waters. She managed to take a seat, gripping the dashboard.
“Once we are a couple of miles up-shore, I’ll slow down.” He put one of those Bluetooth things in his ear and tapped his phone a couple of times.
“Sorry about the noise,” he said. “I need a patrol car at my apartment. Two men are trying to break in. Also, I think they’re tracking Delaney’s phone. We powered it down, but I need someone to come look at it.”
He stood silently, seeming to listen to whoever was on the other end. She stared at his strong, confident profile. Had she not been with him, she would have totally lost it. Probably would have frozen in place, waiting for the bad guy to come get her and do whatever they wanted.
“I’m going to need help getting a safe place for the night,” Josh said.
Strong waves, more fit for the ocean, pounded against the boat, rattling her teeth.
“I appreciate that,” Josh said. “All right. See you soon.” He turned the boat toward the middle of the lake, causing a large wave to hit the side, spraying her. The next wave did the same thing. “Come sit here for a while.” He stood behind the driver’s seat. “Going to get drenched with these waves on that side.”
“It’s too rough to—”
Another splash soaked her hair.
She took his hand, jumping to the middle of the jerking boat, which bucked just enough to send her into his arms. “Sorry,” she muttered, positioning herself in the driver’s seat.
He kept one hand on the steering wheel, putting his lips a little too close to the side of her head. His hot breath tickled her temple. They drove in silence for the next fifteen minutes. The boat pounded against the waves. One large whitecap caused her to grab his arm. His hard bicep twitched and tightened. She should have let go, but she felt safe grasping his firm muscle.
He let go of the steering wheel.
“What are you doing?” she demanded.
“Relax,” he said, tapping his phone. “Hey, Stacey. Did Tristan call you?”
Delaney was grateful when his long, thick fingers gripped the wheel again, taking command of the boat being tossed around like floats in a pool of kids doing cannon balls.
“That’s perfect. See you in five.” He tapped the phone.
“I don’t like you letting go of the steering wheel,” she said.
“It’s not like a car.”
She had to let go of his arm when he pulled back the throttle, slowing down as they approached a narrow channel between an island and a long point, and thankfully, the small area was protected from the wind, making the ride much smoother.
“You can take this off now.” He tugged the cap, lifting it off her head and tossed it in the pocket next to her leg, brushing his soft, sensitive fingers across her skin. “Do you want to drive?”
“No,” she snapped.
He laughed. “All right.”
“I can move back to the other seat now.”
He placed a protective hand on her shoulder. “Might as well stay put. Once we get going again, with the wind direction, that side of the boat is going get doused with water, and in the middle of the lake, it’s going to be even rougher.”
“Won’t it be hard for you to drive like this?”
“Nope.” He turned the steering wheel to the right. “We’ve got to stop at Stacey’s first and pick up some camping equipment.”
“I don’t camp,” she said.
“You will tonight.”
“I can’t keep running forever.” She questioned her sanity and why she so easily did whatever Josh told her to do. What bothered her more was how quickly she believed everything they had said about her brother. She cupped her check, remembering the sound of her attackers’ knuckles slamming into her face. “It seems crazy that we’re taking off instead of waiting for the police and—”
“I need you to trust me.” His arms surrounded her as he slowed the boat to a crawl and maneuvered toward a dock where Stacey stood with a baby on her hip, waving. “The people who are after us will not hesitate to kill us.” Josh continued to steer the boat, turning the steering wheel back and forth, all the while playing with the throttle. Just as they drifted to within feet of the dock, Josh tossed ropes to a man that made even Josh look short.
The tall man shook Josh’s hand, helping him to the dock, then gave him a man-hug, which constituted a slap on the back
“Hi, Delaney. I’m Doug.” He offered her a hand out of the boat.
“I think I’ll stay right here.”
“It’s going to be about a half hour,” Stacey said as her baby thrust himself into Josh’s arms, giggling and talking baby gibberish. “And I’m not giving you a choice, so take my husband’s hand, or I’ll—”
“I get the picture,” Delaney said as she let the tall man drag her out of the boat.
“I’ve got to get the rest of our camping equipment,” Doug said, “and Stacey is going to pack some food up for you while I do that.”
“I really appreciate this,” Josh said.
Delaney stared at Josh as he tossed the little boy up in the air, calling him a ‘little man.’ “He’s grown in the last couple of weeks.” Josh looped his arm around Delaney, with the ‘little man’ on his hip.
She leaned back, looking at him. He shrugged, dropping his hand.
Delaney followed Stacey into a spacious kitchen with gleaming, white granite and bright, whitewashed wood floors. Not bad for a cop’s salary. Then again, Delaney had no idea what Doug did for a living.
“Put Brandon in the playpen,” Stacey said, waving toward the other room. “Can I get either of you something to eat or drink?”
“I think we’re good,” Josh said, setting the boy down, then handing him a couple of books and another toy that seemed to thrill the child. “Are you sure your dad doesn’t mind giving up his campsite for the night?”
Delaney did her best to ignore the conversation between Stacey and Josh as she knelt in front of the playpen and started her own conversation with Brandon, who smiled when she asked if she could read him a book.
Stacey laughed. “His wife hates camping, so she was thrilled, and you know my dad. He’s always happy to help anyone who has my back. He still thinks I should quit.” She put some plastic baggies into a cooler.
Delaney pointed to a fluffy bunny in the book she held out for Brandon to see. “Rabbit.”
He smiled and wiggled his feet and legs.
She continued to flip through the pages, wishing she could be as strong as Stacey.
“What does Tristan have to report?” Stacey asked.
“He’s not going to get much unless he breaks some rules, which I don’t want him to do, so I hired your buddy Luke,” Josh said. “I gotta use the little boys’ room.”
Delaney dropped the book in the playpen and stared out the big sliding glass doors, contemplating running down to the waterfront, jumping in the boat, and taking off. Didn’t matter, she didn’t know the first thing about boats, and she had no idea where’d she go, or who to turn to, other than Josh.
“Are you sure I can’t get you something?” Stacey asked, her tone still accusatory.
Delaney shook her head, pondering why Josh was so willing to come to her rescue. Nothing made sense, and all she wanted was to go back to her quiet little world where she went to work every day, then came home, opened a bottle of wine, and watched television. “Why are you helping me?” Delaney stared at the petite blonde with the fierce eyes.
“This isn’t only about you, but Josh as well.” Stacey slammed the fridge shut. “I’m sorry you got beat up, and I will do whatever it takes to make sure those two men are arrested. And if what you say is true, and you were just a pawn in a game to bring Josh down, then I will do my part to protect you. It’s my job.”
Delaney opened her mouth, but Stacey held up her hand.
“Josh is more than a co-worker to me. He’s family, and when family asks for my help, I give it to them. So, if there is something else he needs to know about about Craypo, his men, or your brother, you better start talking. Or tell me. It will make protecting you both that much easier.”
“I understand you don’t like me.”
“I don’t know you well enough to make a decision, one way or the other, but I’m not real fond of what you did to Josh, and if your story doesn’t pan out—”
“It’s the truth.” Delaney held her ground, even though she wanted to curl up in a tiny ball and disappear. “I feel like a fool.” She clenched her fists, wishing she had the balls to hit the countertop. “Actually, I’m pissed off. I don’t understand why Liam is with these crazy people. I don’t know why they sent me up here to ruin Josh. I can’t even justify what I did with…” Her face heated with rage.
“I’d wager if you talk out the events with Josh that led up to last night, you might know more than you thought. You don’t appear to be stupid. Naïve, maybe, but not stupid.”
Delaney shook out her hands. The last time she’d felt this kind of anger was the day her brother said he was going to continue to work for her ex-boyfriend. “I have no idea what to do. Or who to believe. Or who to trust.”
“You can trust Josh.” Stacey gave a reassuring smile as she closed the cooler, setting it on the floor. “But don’t you dare lie to him again.”
“I don’t understand why he’s willing to help me at all, considering what I did to him.”
“Because he believes you were a pawn, and not the mark. Craypo wants Josh to suffer, or to be dead, or both, and somehow, you and your brother got dragged into it.”
Delaney looked in the direction of the bathroom. “I go back and forth between believing my brother tossed me under the bus, or praying he’s being manipulated somehow and has no choice.”
“Anything is possible with Craypo,” Stacey said.
“What did Josh do to this guy to make him want to hurt Josh so badly?”
“Not my story to tell,” Stacey said. “Just trust Josh. He’s one of the best. He knows what he’s doing.”
The door to the bathroom clicked open, and Josh reappeared in the kitchen. “Can we borrow some soap, an extra toothbrush, a few towels—”
Stacey interrupted. “Already packed with a change of clothing.”
“I’ll swim in Doug’s clothes,” Josh said. “He’s a good four or five inches taller than me, and you’re shorter—”
“Borrowed them from my dad and his wife,” Stacey said with a smile. “I’ve got you covered.”
The sliding glass door glided open as Doug entered the room. “Everything you need is in your boat, including a couple bundles of firewood.”
“My dad’s site is for three nights,” Stacey said. “If you need anything at all, someone can run it up to you.”
“Thanks.” Josh leaned over the playpen then patted the little boy on his head. “See you later, little man.”
The boy looked up, smiled, and waved, babbling something that sounded like bye-bye.
Delaney followed Josh back down the path toward the dock, occasionally looking over her shoulder at the couple standing on the deck. Her chest tightened. In all her life, she’d wanted only one thing, and that was to fit in somewhere. To belong. To have what Josh had with these people in this place.
* * *
Josh sat at the picnic table with Tristan and his boss, Jared Blake.
Tristan examined Delaney’s phone while he used a special device to help them decipher if they had manipulated the phone to track Delaney, or if they were just using the technology off the phone itself. “We sent the phone case to the lab.”
Josh swallowed. It was entirely possible he hadn’t deleted all the files. “This could be embarrassing.”
“When I first started dating my wife, she had a stalker, and he hid in the bushes at our home and took pictures. It’s embarrassing, but there are worse things.” Jared had to be the best Trooper that Josh had ever worked under. Jared ran a tight ship and demanded the highest results from everyone in his station, but he also had an enormous heart, and every Trooper under his command was treated like family. “I told the techs to look for a tracking device. If there is a recording, you’ll be the first to see it and decide if it has relevance.”
“Wonderful.” Josh looked over his shoulder. Delaney sat on the dock, back to him, feet dangling in the water, her long, blond hair pulled up in a braid and twisted around in a clip. She’d been quiet most of the evening, only speaking when spoken to. “I’m sorry I put you all in the middle of this mess.”
“We’ve all had our share of messes,” Jared said, “and when you first transferred here, we both knew something like this could happen when Craypo got out.”
“I honestly didn’t expect it to come in the form of a beautiful woman,” Josh said. “Craypo’s plan was almost genius. If she could have somehow proved I beat her, and I was convicted, I wouldn’t last five minutes in jail.”
“It would have been difficult to prove,” Tristan said, “but it didn’t happen, so no point in pondering it anymore.” He set the phone on the table. “Once you power the phone back on, it will only take a few minutes to track your location. I’m off at midnight. We’re going to put a boat at Glen Island for the night, just in case.”
“Good to know.” Josh caught Delaney’s gaze when she glanced over her shoulder. Her bruised cheek glowed under the night sky. Had he not used the bathroom before heading back down with her phone, he would never have seen her attackers dragging her behind the Dumpster. He blinked, forcing the images out of his mind.
“I called your old boss,” Jared said. “He contacted Craypo’s parole officer, and Craypo’s been following all the rules. Model citizen.”
“Knowing Craypo the way I do,” Josh said, “he’s already set in motion another plan. He’s methodical, which is bad, because he worst-cases everything. Also, his plans usually have phases that account for possible failures.”
“How long were you undercover in Craypo’s organization?” Tristan asked.
“One very long year.” Josh ran a hand across his face. “It took me three months to get deep inside, then six months to get any real evidence on him, but not enough to take him down. That was until Nicki, his wife, started feeding me intel, but that was a set-up I didn’t see coming.”
“Don’t start blaming yourself again,” Jared said. “I read all the reports before I agreed to take you in my station. It wasn’t your fault.”
“My mother always said I was a sucker for a damsel in distress.” Josh eyed a boat slowing as it approached the island. Three young children were perched on the bow, so he decided it was a non-threat.
“Not necessarily a bad thing,” Tristan said.
“It is when one pumps a few bullets into your chest, and the other records you in bed and—”
“That does take a pair,” Tristan said. “Might want to sleep with one eye open tonight.”
“Stacey said that Delaney was pretty shaken up this morning and believes, based on her interview, that she knew very little of what was going on, or why. That said, Stacey doesn’t trust Delaney as far as she can spit,” Jared added.
“I don’t think Delaney saw the attack coming, much less knew about it,” Josh admitted, “but Craypo’s plans are always layered, and often one player doesn’t know what the other one is doing, or that they are even being played. Also, remember that he likes to fuck with people until he has them so paranoid or delusional that they beg him to end their suffering.”
“You think she’s still part of whatever plan Craypo has?” Tristan asked.
“After what I went through with Nicki”—Josh rubbed the scars on his shoulder—“I have to be more than suspicious, but it doesn’t mean she knows she’s part of any plan.”
“Best to be suspicious at this point,” Jared said. “So, what do you plan on doing?”
Josh glanced toward Delaney, still on the dock, feet dangling in the water. “I want to use today and tomorrow to break her.”
“It’s supposed to rain all day,” Tristan said.
“Puts us in a two-man tent with plenty of time for me to question her without any distractions. By tomorrow night, I should know if she’s part of Craypo’s organization, or simply collateral damage,” Josh said. “Luke is looking into her life.”
“That’s a smart move,” Jared said. “I’ve got to play this by the book, so feel free to leave anything out that might put me in a compromising situation. Stay safe tonight, and check in with me regularly, you hear?”
Josh stood, shaking both men’s hands. “I appreciate everything you’re doing for me.” He watched as both men strolled down to the dock. Delaney rose and exchanged words with Jared and Tristan. She shoved her hands deep into her pockets as Jared flicked on the patrol boat lights and eased from the dock.
“They don’t like me,” she said.
“Can you blame them?”
“I guess not.” She stood a few feet to his left, staring at the tent. “What do we do now?”
“We get ready for bed.” He handed her a small bag. “I think you’ll find everything you need in that. I’ve got a bucket of water over there.” He pointed tin container by the fire pit. “Use that to wash your face, then put some in a small cup to brush your teeth.”
She put her hands on her hips and tilted her head. “I’m not a small child.”
“But you’ve never been camping before.”
“True,” she said.
“When you’re done, we’ll walk to the outhouse together.”
“Gross,” she muttered.
He watched her as she went through the motions of cleaning up for bed. The anger and rage she’d shown after finding out her brother wasn’t being held hostage made Josh want to believe she had no more secrets. That her only transgression had been to seduce him because she honestly believed her brother’s life had been threatened.
That was certainly forgivable.
They took turns using the outhouse, something she didn’t like much, since she went in plugging her nose and came out with scowl, still holding her nostrils. Well, no one liked an outhouse, but such was life when you went camping.
As they walked back along the short trail from the outhouse to their campsite, he noticed heavy clouds rolling in with the warm breeze. Thick moisture filled the air.
“Are we going to be safe here?” she asked as she climbed into the tent on her hands and knees, giving him a nice view of her tight ass.
He blinked. “There’s a patrol boat parked not too far from here. We should be fine.”
“’Should be’ is the part I’m worried about.”
He paused for a moment, holding the flap of the tent open, shining the light inside. “Did Stacey pack you something to sleep in?”
“I think so,” Delaney said.
“I’ll wait out here until you’re done changing.”
Once she took the light, he turned his back and mentally berated himself. It was one thing to be attracted to a woman you weren’t sure you could trust, but to still have the hots for a girl who betrayed you? There was something seriously wrong with his taste in women.
“Okay, I’m done,” she said.
The tent was smaller than he thought, but it would protect them from the rain, and he kept telling himself the tight quarters would force her to tell him everything, if there was more to tell. As he sat on top of his sleeping bag, he stared at the blond beauty wearing a white tank top and…whatever else was covered by the sleeping bag.
“Mind if I keep the light on?” he asked. “I have some things to do on my iPad.”
“It’s fine.” She rolled to her side, her back to him, hugging a small pillow.
He tried to focus on the iPad screen, but it proved impossible, especially with the way Delaney tossed, letting out a high-pitched sigh with each turn. Quickly, Josh stripped down to his boxers and slid inside the sleeping bag, before flipping the electric lamp off.
“Does it have a dimmer?” Delaney asked with a panic-stricken voice.
“It does.” After dimming the light, he rolled to his side and placed his hand on the nape of her neck.
She jumped. “What are you doing?”
“Trying to help you settle down and relax.” His fingers danced across the skin on her neck, occasionally massaging. “My mother used to do this to me when I was a little boy and couldn’t fall asleep.”
“Did it work?”
“Mostly,” he said. “She would do this and tell me stories about my dad.”
“What kind of stories?”
“Things that would make me feel like I knew him.” He would listen to his mother talk for hours about his dad and his parents’ life together, and how excited his father had been when they found out they were finally going to have a child. For the majority of Josh’s childhood, the stories worked, making him feel like he actually knew his father. The photographs. The videos. It all gave him the knowledge of a father. But as he grew older, it often saddened him that his father was two-dimensional, and that his memories were not his own.
“Will you tell me one?”
Once his mother had died, he held onto the stories tighter, because they were her memories, and she’d loved his dad with all that she was until the day she died...and Josh loved his mother. She was his rock. His world. “My parents were high school sweethearts,” he said.
“That’s so cute.”
Josh laughed. “My mom dumped my dad to spend a year in Europe. She said she never once looked back, nor thought of my dad at all during her year abroad. Didn’t even try to find him when she came home and went to college.”
Josh propped himself up on his elbow and stared at his fingers, tickling up and down her arms, across her shoulders and neck, and wondering why he couldn’t just roll over, close his eyes, and pray for sleep. “Right after my dad graduated from the State Police Academy, a friend of his asked him to be his best man. The maid of honor was my mom. That had been the first time they’d seen each other in five years, and my mom said the moment she laid eyes on him, she knew she loved him. He, on the other hand, was dating someone else. My mom, being the woman she was, didn’t act on her feelings or even tell my father she had any. Just said ‘Hello, good to see you,’ and that was it.”
“Was the other woman at the wedding?”
“She was,” Josh said. “Three days after the wedding, my dad shows up at my mom’s apartment with an engagement ring, telling her he’d never stopped loving her and that this time, he wasn’t going to let her go running off to Europe. They were married three months later.”
“That’s insanely romantic.”
“I suppose it was,” he said. His mother had always told him that when you knew someone was right for you, you just knew it. It didn’t make sense, but you felt it deep in your core. He hadn’t felt that way about Nicki. He loved the idea of Nicki, of saving her and her boys, but he’d never loved her in the way his mother described.
But Delaney? She burrowed all the way into his core, and he was positive it was the kind of feeling his mother described, only he wasn’t willing to accept it. “Do you want me to leave the light on all night?”
“If you don’t mind,” she said, her voice barely audible.
“I noticed last night when you got up to use the bathroom, you left the light on. Are you afraid of the dark?”
“I just prefer a night light.”
“When I lived in the Bronx, there was always some kind of light shining through my window. And the noise of the train rattling the tracks as it whizzed by helped lull me to sleep. Took me a while to get used to the night sounds and how dark it could be up here.”
“I like the crickets.” She turned her head, her eyelids fluttering open. “I’m scared.”
His breath hitched. “Of what?”
“Of everything. Of what my brother might be involved in. Of how easily I was manipulated by these people, whoever they are. And I’m afraid of you.”
“Me? I’m trying to protect you, even though you tried to destroy me.”
“Why are you doing that?”
He rolled onto his back, putting one hand behind his head, the other still gently caressing the smooth, silky skin on the back of her hand. “Because no matter who you are to Craypo, he will kill you, and I won’t let that happen on my watch.”