Chapter Fifteen
Angela
“Hey! Open up!”
My head swung in the direction of the front door to Charlie’s. I blew out a breath when I saw it was just Sean at the door. We still had an hour until the bar opened for the day, which meant it was just me.
“Hey, thanks for coming,” I said, once I unlocked and opened the door for my brother. “Where’s my nephew?”
“I’m not enough?” he asked.
“No. Where’s my guy?”
“He’s with his mama. Damn shame. I can’t even get a hello from my own sister since his little ass came in the picture.”
I laughed, swatting his chest. “I did say hey and thanked you for stopping by to fix the faucet.” The faucet behind the bar had been acting funny, and when I mentioned it to Sean, he offered to stop by to take a look at it. He was the consummate handyman.
“Yeah, whatever. Speaking of your guys, why didn’t you ask your little friend to come take a look?”
I gave him a dry expression. “Don’t refer to Eric as my little friend. Especially, since he’s about the same height as you.”
“Yeah, but he’s scrawny.”
I laughed at the ridiculousness of his statement. “He’s hardly scrawny. You’ve seen firsthand that he’s very well chiseled.”
My brother snorted, lips twisted in disgust. “Don’t fucking remind me.”
I laughed, remembering how Sean had walked in on us the day before…
“Angela you― Oh shit! The hell are you doing here and with no shirt on?” Sean yelled, as he walked into my house, using the house key I given him.
“Sean!” I screeched, moving around Eric and entering the living room. “What are you doing here?”
My brother frowned, giving me an incredulous look. “What am I doing here? This is my parents’ house. The house I grew up in. The more appropriate question is what is he doing here, and with no shirt!”
“You probably should calm down.”
My eyes bulged when I heard the challenge in Eric’s voice as he stepped around me, getting in between Sean and I. I couldn’t let this happen.
“Yo, who the hell―”
“Hey, hey, hey!” I yelled, getting in between the two giants. “Let’s everyone take a breather.” I inhaled, as a example, and then exhaled. “Okay, Sean, you already know Eric. He and I are… dating.”
“Dating?” Sean acted as if it was a foreign word to him.
“Yes, dating, as in seeing each other, a couple,” Eric spoke up.
“Yes, Sean, we’re dating. And this isn’t your house. It’s mine, and I’ve told you to call before you come over.”
My brother sucked his teeth, giving me a side-eye, before directing his attention back to Eric.
“You’re dating my little sister? This better not be some game, or for gossip around the station.” He pointed at Eric.
“If it were, you would’ve heard about it by now… not that it’s any of your damn business.”
“My sister is my business. And I know how you bunch at Rescue Four blow through women.”
“Not any more than you all at Rescue Two,” Eric retorted.
Sean looked stumped there.
“Whatever, man. You just make sure you do right by my sister.”
“I don’t have to be told that, but thanks for the reminder.”
“Yeah, whatever,” Sean grumbled, taking one last look at me and then heading out the door he just entered.
“That’s what you get for barging into my house without calling first. Serves you right,” I told Sean, leaning over the bar.
“Whatever, Angela. I just hope you know what you’re doing.” He planted the small tool bag he brought with him on the counter.
“And why wouldn’t I?” I asked defensively.
“Because I know how women fall all over firefighters. I am one, remember? We talk a few sweet words, tell ’em a story or two about the job, and they’re putty.”
“Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence.”
He pursed his lips. “I’m serious, Angela.”
“I’m serious, too. I’m not a young twenty-something falling for the hot guy with the dangerous job. I was raised by a firefighter and the big brother I always looked up to is one, remember?”
Sean, peered at me dead on, his lips twitching at the compliment. He sighed.
“I mean, the two men I’ve loved my whole life are firefighters and set the bar pretty damn high on how I should be treated. It only makes sense I’d fall for a firefighter who treats me pretty damn special as well.”
I looked up to see a raised eyebrow staring back at me. “Fall for?”
I hadn’t even realized my slip of the tongue there. “Yeah,” I sighed.
“And you think he’s as serious about you as you are him?”
I thought back to the previous day, Eric’s wet body pressed against mine in the shower. The words he spoke about not releasing inside of me until we get married. Not if but when. The acuteness of his gaze as he looked me right in the eye. As if it was a foregone conclusion.
“Yeah, I think so,” I responded; my voice sounded airy to my ears.
Sean paused, watching me for a few moments before finally nodding.
“Why didn’t you have lover boy come fix this faucet since he has you all starry-eyed and shit?”
“He offered, but he had to work, and I needed it looked at before his shift ended. Thank you very much!” I added, popping one of the maraschino cherries from the bar into my mouth.
He feigned hurt. “So I was your second option?”
“Yes. Don’t pretend like your feelings are hurt, I offered to make you and my nephew my double fudge brownies as a token of my appreciation.”
“And I’m holding you to that, too.” He pointed at me as he sank to the floor to take a look underneath the faucet.
I waved my hand in the air dismissively. “I know. I know.”
****
Eric
“Studying hard?”
I peeked over my shoulder to see Carter rounding my cot. I had a stack of notecards in my hand, all with facts, figures, and information that would be pertinent to the lieutenant's exam. I carried them with me everywhere these days. Whenever there was a free moment at the station, I pulled them out. I was loathed to admit out loud, but part of the reason I was so drawn to the cards wasn’t solely because of the exam. It was also the adorable, cursive handwriting that Angela had written on the cards. Interspersed between the actual information-filled cards were notecards that read things like “You’ve got this in the bag!” or “You’ve already aced the test!” or “I’m so proud of you for passing!” Who does that type of shit? Better yet, what type of a sap got a thrill out of it?
Me.
That’s who.
It was pure joy knowing I had that type of support. I mean, sure the guys at the station were supportive, but nothing compared to hearing Angela tell me what a good job I was doing. I think I could’ve lived on her compliments alone.
“Yeah, the test is in little less than a month,” I responded to Carter.
He nodded, sitting across from me on his cot. “And what happens after the test?”
“Well, if I pass, then I’ll have to interview with some department heads. They’ll check my resume, test scores, commendations, and all of that, then make a decision.”
“And if you get promoted there’s a chance you’ll be out of Rescue Four, right?”
I almost flinched at that reminder. The department didn’t like to promote within the same station since it was believed that the new lieutenant would have a less likely chance of being respected. From their standpoint, it was hard for a group of firefighters to now look at someone who’d been their peer for so long, now as someone they had to report to.
“There’s a possibility, but since Rescue Four needs lieutenants, I’m hoping they’ll promote within.”
“Since Gary...” Carter’s gaze dropped to the floor. A solemn feeling hovered in the air. Gary was Rescue Four’s other lieutenant who died while doing the job we all love so much. Carter was injured while trying to save him. He died in Carter’s arms.
“He would’ve wanted the job filled. And I know he’d be honored to have you take his place,” Carter finally spoke.
I kept my gaze lowered, as a weight settled in my chest. We didn’t do a lot of sappy emotions here, so when we did, it hit you in your chest.
“Now, let’s see what you got for these questions.” Carter broke up the moment, snatching the stack of notecards from my hands.
Leaping up, I reached to snatch the notecards from his hands. Carter pulled back. “I’m just trying to help, man. Relax.” He looked at me as if I was ridiculous. “All right, let’s see, okay…You’ve just reported for your shift at the station, and while stowing your gear, you hear a noise in the bathroom. You go to check it out and see Firefighter B slumped over in a stall, the stench of alc―” He broke off, realizing the remaining part of the question.
“Just give me.” I reached for the cards, and he moved again.
“No. No, it’s fine. You should know the answer to this question anyway. You smell the stench of alcohol, what do you do. A …” He rattled off the answer options before stopping to look at me, expectantly. “You’ve already lived it, and you made the right call. What do you do?”
“Carter―”
“Harvard, answer the question. What do you do?”
“Report it to an officer.”
He flipped the card for the answer. “Correct. See, that wasn’t so bad. Okay, next question.”
I blew out a breath, arms folded across my chest as he flipped to the next card.
“Well, what’s this here? I’m so proud of you,” he read from the card in a mock girly voice. “Awww, isn’t that the cutest thing,” he sing-songed. “With the little hearts around it for emphasis,” he continued taunting me and turned the card, holding it up for me to see.
That’s when I lunged for him to grab the stack. “Shut the fuck up!” I yelled over his roaring laughter.
“Does she cut the crust off your sandwiches, too?” he gibed.
“I’ll fucking kill you,” I growled as we wrestled.
“Better men than you have tried.” His laughter sounded like taunting cackles in my ear.
A deep clearing of the throat followed by, “Gentlemen,” broke up our ruckus.
From the floor, both of our eyes first went to the shiny black boots directly in front of us, up the legs, torso, and eventually the stern face of Captain Waverly.
“Entertaining yourselves in between calls?”
I peered over at Carter, shoving his shoulder as we both stood up. I snatched the stack of notecards from him when he was unaware.
“Sorry, Cap.”
“I was just trying to help Harvard study.” Mirth still filled Carter’s voice.
“I see. Might be helpful to do that with a little less wrestling.”
“Noted,” Carter nodded his head and responded.
“I need to speak with you.” Captain’s eyes were planted on Carter.
“Sure thing, Cap.”
Captain turned and walked away in the direction of his office. Carter started behind him, giving me a look over his shoulder.
“I hope you’re getting fired,” I tossed at him.
A grin broke out on Carter’s face.
“No such luck, Harvard,” Captain yelled over his shoulder, causing Carter’s laugh to intensify.
I chuckled, shaking my head as I watched the pair disappear behind the Captain’s door. At the same time, my cell phone rang. I picked it up from my cot without looking and answered, “Hello.”
“Hi, son.”
My eyes snapped shut in regret. I should’ve checked before I answered.
“Hey, Ma.”
I’ve barely spoken to my mother since the night of my father’s birthday party. When we did speak, she tried to ask if I was still seeing Angela. Hearing the disapproval in her voice, I chose to maintain my distance for the time being.
“Are you working?”
“Yup.”
“Okay, I don’t want to keep you, but I did want to ask if we could meet for lunch or dinner. I’d like to talk. We haven’t spoken, really spoken, in so long.”
I snorted. “I can’t do lunch or dinner. I’m working an overnight shift.”
“What about tomorrow?”
I closed my eyes, chest rising as I inhaled. “We can do breakfast around nine-fifteen tomorrow morning.”
“You won’t be too tired after your shift?”
“I’ll be fine.”
“Okay, let’s meet at that little breakfast place not too far from campus that you love.”
“I’ll be there.”
“Okay, son. I love you.”
“Me too, Ma.” I disconnected the call wondering what to expect at breakfast.
****
I walked into the breakfast place that was just a block away from the university where my mother had been a faculty member for more than twenty years. When I looked around, I saw my mother waving in my direction, already seated at one of the booths. I sauntered over to her table, feeling the eleven calls we went on the previous night. My goal was to get this over as soon as possible and head home for some sleep.
“Hey, Mom,” I greeted, pressing a kiss to her cheek before sitting.
She frowned. “You look tired.”
“We had a busy night.” I ran a hand down my face.
“I figured you would be tired. I ordered a cup of coffee for you. Black.” She pushed a mug of piping hot coffee across the shiny surface of the wooden table towards me.
Relief flooded my veins as soon as the smell of the coffee hit my nostrils. This jolt of caffeine would help hold me over for the next hour or two until I could get home to my bed.
“Thanks for this.” I took a sip. “So, what’d you want to talk about?”
“Let’s order breakfast first, shall we.” She waved her hand for the waitress.
I held my tongue just wanting to get this over and done with. I was tired as hell, and frankly, I was leery of what my mother had to say. She ordered an omelet with toast and fruit, while I got a breakfast sandwich on an everything bagel.
“Okay, breakfast has been ordered.”
“What about juice? We haven’t ordered any―”
“Ma, please.” I did my best to control my voice.
“Okay, okay. It’s just that I feel like I see you so rarely these days. I’m afraid you’re going to rush away.”
“And whose fault is that?” I clasped my hands, placing them on the table and sitting forward.
Her eyes narrowed. “I’m still your mother.”
I nodded. “Which is why I’m here. You are my mother, and I love you very much. But that doesn’t mean your behavior toward Angela didn’t disappoint me or that I’d let it stand.”
My mother sat back in the booth, using one hand to push her short hair behind her left ear. “You care for this woman.”
“Very much.”
“Why?”
I tilted my head. “You want me to explain why I care for her?”
“Yes.”
I sighed and thought about it for a moment. Not about why I cared so deeply for Angela―that answer was as easy to come up with as breathing―I pondered whether or not I even wanted to answer my mother. I didn’t feel like I needed to explain myself or my feelings to her. But then I remember how important it was to give a little when it came to relationships with others, even parents… hell, especially parents.
“I adore the way she can light up a room. How she works to make others around her feel included and acknowledged. I love how supportive she is and that she isn’t shy about telling me how well I’m doing while studying for the lieutenant's exam.”
“You’re studying for the exam? For a promotion?”
I nodded.
My mother clasped her own hands on the table, her gaze averted. “I didn’t know that.”
“That makes you upset,” I observed.
She peered up at me, blinking, trying to hide the sadness in her eyes. “No. Yes. Maybe. I don’t know.”
I frowned. “You’re confusing me, Ma.”
We grew quiet when the waitress brought out our plates. My mother’s face remained somber, as she unfolded a napkin, placed it in her lap, and picked up her knife and fork in preparation to begin eating, which we did in silence.
“I just feel like I don’t know you anymore. You’re my only son, and we’ve grown so distant over the last seven years. Ever since you became a firefighter.”
I peered up at her from my half-eaten sandwich, wiped my mouth, and swallowed the last bite I took. “That’s not the job’s fault, Ma.”
She held up her hands. “I know.”
“When I joined, you and Dad made it clear how much you despised the idea. I don’t know if you realize, but going through the academy was the toughest thing I ever did. It would’ve been nice having my parents support me through that.” I clamped my mouth shut, not wanting anymore to spill out. I held that in for the last seven years. Since the academy, I’ve been through a hell of a lot more, but still kept it from my parents because I knew if I dared speak up on the darker side of my job, they’d be down my throat about my quitting and going back to work in finance.
“You’re right. But you have to understand our point of view. We put you in the best schools we could get you in, spent money on all the best tutors and lessons to get you into Harvard so that you could have the opportunities that not many others could even dream of.”
“I appreciate all of that, Mom. I do. But what about what I wanted? I tried the life you and Dad placed me in. I did the finance thing, and I was miserable every day. I knew early on my calling was to help others, to be a fireman. No, it doesn’t require the Harvard education, but it is a worthy career.”
“I know that,” she defended.
“Then why couldn’t you just support me?” My voice rose higher than I intended. I exhaled, shaking my head and staring off out of the window. “It doesn’t even matter,” I stated, my gaze pinned on a passersby. “All I want to know is what any of this has to do with Angela? Why are you so reluctant to get to know her?”
“She’s just different,” my mother insisted. “I always pictured you with some introverted girl, who’d make the perfect stay-at-home mom or working a regular nine-to-five. Not someone with purple hair who owns a bar.”
“Again, your dream not mine.”
She held up her hand. “You’re right. It’s taking me time to come around to the idea that you are your own man. And honestly, when I saw you with her the night of your father’s birthday, you two seemed to complement each other. It made me a little jealous.”
“Jealous?”
“Yes.” She nodded, taking a sip of her coffee. “You’ve never been that close to me. I felt left out, especially when I saw how your father melted at her charms as well.”
I grinned. “Angela has that effect on people.”
“I saw. I went down to that bar she owns.”
My head snapped back in shock. “When?”
“Two weeks ago with some colleagues. She didn’t see me. We walked in, and she was dancing behind the bar, making drinks, and making sure everyone was having a good time. When she came from around the bar to greet guests at the tables, I ducked and headed to the bathroom,” my mother admitted sheepishly.
I chuckled. “Were you on a recognizance mission?”
She shrugged. “I just wanted to see her for myself. See who she was when she wasn’t putting on a front for her boyfriend’s parents.”
“And?”
She let out a little moan and sighed. “She seemed just as genuine.”
“Though you obviously loathe to admit it.”
“It’s not that. I just feel like I’ve lost so much time with you, and now this wonderful woman has come into your life and…” She paused and shrugged. “It seems like I’ll get even less of you.”
“Ma―”
“I know, I’m being silly.” She waved her hand around. “I just, your life terrifies me,” she admitted and ducked her head, dabbing at her eyes with her napkin.
“My life? You mean my job?”
“Your job is your life. At least it was until this Angela came along. And I feel left out of that, too, and it all just terrifies me.” She sighed heavily.
I was still confused as to what she meant by all this.
“It’s hard to explain, son. You’ll understand when you have your own children. You raise them and have this image of who they’ll be, and then they grow up to be their own people, and you just want to go back to the time when you were their whole world.”
“I don’t know how to respond to that.” I felt for my mother, so I reached across the table to grab her hand.
“You don’t have to respond. I just need to do better at learning to accept you for who you are and not who I want you to be.”
“That’d probably save us a whole lot of trouble.”
She let out a small laugh. “Probably.”
Covering my hand with hers, she squeezed. “I love you, son. And I’m so sorry for not being there like you needed us during your training.”
I nodded, touched by her apology. “Thanks for that.”
“With that said, I’d like to have you and Angela over. For a do-over. No extra guests this time. You, me, your father, and Angela.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“Your father and I would really like to have a second chance.”
I blew out a breath. “I’ll talk to Angela about it, and we’ll see when our schedules are free.”
My mother smiled a genuine smile.
We finished up our breakfasts, talking a little more just catching up with one another. I missed my mother—both my parents in the last few weeks, but even longer than that. I’ve never really expressed how hurt I was while training during the academy. I remember wanting to quit more than once and feeling like I wasn’t cut out for this career. But it was the will instilled in me by my parents that made me forge ahead. All the stories I heard growing up of what my grandparents went through just to come here and fend for themselves spurred me on. If they could endure that, I sure as hell could endure this, I spent many nights repeating over and over to myself.
I insisted on taking care of the bill once we finished. After giving my mother a kiss on the cheek and promises that I’d do my best to set up that date, I headed home. I planned to get some sleep before I needed to return to work that night, but not before stopping over at Charlie’s to see my favorite girl.