Chapter Twenty-One
Once again, Nash found himself driving through the canyon, and though he knew each turn by heart, he was completely lost, without a goal, without direction. Yes, he could go work on the cottage, yes, he could go play some music, and yes, he could get some of his long neglected work done at his apartment, but as he drove away from Upton’s, he decided to take the night off, with no commitments to anybody.
The mountain road descended into the city, leaving him in Hollywood, his proverbial stomping grounds. If he went right he could end up near some of his favorite clubs, places where he would be treated as rock royalty, much to Stacy’s chagrin. If he turned left he could go by Erik’s.
Instead, he glanced over at his dashboard and caught sight of the time.
“Seven o’clock.” A shudder ran through him. He only had to make it through the next five hours. In five hours his life would belong to him again. There would be no questions about the cottage. There would be no more Petals.
At his thoughts, a wave of nausea wracked him.
In five hours there would be no Petals.
It would be over.
They would be over.
The car behind him honked and he looked up to see the light turned green then jolted the car forward, causing the offer papers on the cottage to fall on the floorboard.
How could he give it up?
Was he keeping it out of spite or memories?
Would he ever be able to return to it and not think about Petals?
What would she do when he didn’t show up to her office party?
He tried to take a deep breath, but came up short. None of this was his concern anymore. They had no future. He was a mess who would never fit in her world. Stacy only expressed what everyone else was too kind to say. It was merely the finality of the situation that was making him second-guess his decision.
That and the fact he fell in love with the woman.
He fell in love with her.
He pounded his fist into the steering wheel. What on earth was he doing? How could he simply let her leave without even giving her the chance of seeing the real him? It was time to be a man, but he had to be the best man he could be.
He glanced down at himself and ran his hand over his shaggy beard. Nothing said he was the one for her like showing up in tattered jeans with a matching stained t-shirt to a formal affair. In truth, he owned nothing that would fit with what Petals needed.
No doubt he was crazy, all this would do was prove they weren’t meant to be together.
After fifteen minutes of driving around Hollywood and counting down the minutes to midnight, he ended up behind Erik’s theatre. With a shake of his head, he got out of the car and used his cane to knock on the door.
Christine, Christine’s stomach, and Erik all opened the door.
“I told you he wasn’t dead.” Erik put his arm around his wife.
“I knew you were alive, my hormones are making me crazy.” Christine smiled and went to hug him, her stomach banging into him first.
“You look horrible.” Erik winced.
“Thank you.” Nash bent forward to give Christine a hug.
“Don’t touch me.” She held her arms out. “Erik is right, you do look horrible. What happened to you? Aren’t you supposed to be getting ready for the party?”
“I think you can see by my appearance that I am not going to any party.” At last, sense found him.
“Christine, move back so I can properly slam the door in Nash’s face.” Erik held on to the edge of the door.
“How can I go? I look awful, the two of you both confirmed it.”
Erik gently moved Christine aside and got up in his face. “If you didn’t look like something a cat dragged in and then vomited up, would you go and not leave the woman looking for you all night, and breaking her heart?”
Nash scratched his nails down his scalp. “I don’t know what I’m doing. All she’s going to see is an old rock star who is dim and dingy.”
“Do you love her, Nash?” Christine asked.
First he shrugged, then he nodded. “Yes.”
“Erik, he loves her, we have to fix him.” Christine’s voice broke.
“Come on.” Erik took hold of his shirt and dragged him inside. “Let’s start by getting you clean.”
“We will have you looking just like a handsome prince by the time we are done with you.” Christine clapped.
Before he had a chance to protest, ask Erik or Christine if he was doing the right thing, or turn around and get back in his car, his friend closed the door. Keeping hold of him, Erik led him through the back of the theatre and down the stairs below the stage and down to the lush living spaces Erik had created.
“Let’s start by decontaminating you.” Erik thrust him inside a huge bathroom and turned on the shower. “Don’t come out until the water runs clear. There’s a fresh razor in the drawer and towels in the cabinet. Remember to lather rinse and repeat.”
His friend left, closing the door behind him.
Nash put his cane aside and went through the motions of getting undressed and stepping into the shower. The hot water steamed around him and for quite some time he stood there wondering how he was going to pull this off. Was he actually going to do this? Go to the party? See Petals?
Still, he got himself clean, returned his beard to its pristine condition and blew dry his hair, finally emerging back into the hallway with only his cane and a towel wrapped around his waist. The cool air blasted him and he shook his head. He couldn’t see himself going to her, but then again he couldn’t see himself not going. For too long he had been stagnant, maybe even since the accident. Now was the time to act.
A pair of boots in her hand, Christine trundled out from one of the rooms, stopped, and furrowed her eyebrows.
“What’s wrong?” He gave a quick glance down to the towel to make sure he covered everything up in front of Erik’s wife.
She took him all in and tapped a finger to her chin. “I’m not sure. I think I always pictured you with a bunch of tattoos.”
“I’m sorry to disappoint.” He let out a laugh.
“Not that she should be looking.” Erik motioned for him to follow him into one of the rooms. “I found exactly what you should wear.”
Before entering, he elbowed Erik. “Once I’m in public with her, she’s going to know who I am.”
“We are personally going to make sure of it.” Erik rubbed his hands together and handed him the boots. “I want you to always remember who you are.” He pushed him into the room and closed the door.
Racks and racks costumes from the theatre lined the walls, but on a rack right in the middle of the huge room was the attire Erik deemed appropriate for tonight.
Back in the days of Spectre, Erik was the one who dressed up and nothing was off limits. Of all of them, he was the showman, the one who stood out, the one who performed. Nash preferred jeans and t-shirts with maybe some funky jewelry to round out his persona. If they attended an award show, he would add a jacket to his normal selection and because of his position in life, anything he wore was acceptable.
However, tonight he felt as if he should fit in.
What Erik selected was definitely a stand out.
He limped over to the clothes. Only rock stars could get away with the outfit his friend chose. On anyone else they would look like they were trying too hard. Not even a movie star could pull this off.
Maybe this was exactly what he needed to show Petals his true self.
He let the towel fall and slipped on the pants. Normal black tuxedo pants that somehow fit perfectly.
With a shake of his head, he put on the white button down shirt complete with jeweled buttons and ruffles at the neck and cuffs. The damn thing must have been used in some Victorian era play.
Lastly, he donned the jacket. At least Erik had the sense to pick out something with tails, but what made the piece noteworthy was the gold and silver embroidery over the entire coat. The entire ensemble tight roped between a costume fit for Halloween, something military, and something old world.
He put on the boots and stood in front of the mirror. For the first time in a long time he felt like Nash Cinder, if only he didn’t have to carry around his dilapidated cane.
“Are you dressed?” Erik knocked, then opened the door.
“Oh, it’s perfect!” Christine clapped.
“There is one final thing missing.” From behind his back, Erik produced what appeared to be a glass walking stick. “I think this fits your look a little more.”
Christine put her hand over her mouth.
He took hold of the art piece with the intricate carvings on it, and what appeared to be a huge jewel right on top. “Is this strong enough.”
“Just use it for support, that’s all you need.” Erik patted his back. “Now let’s go, your carriage awaits, my friend. Christine and I will take you there and hopefully escort you and your princess home.”
Before they left he glanced back at his reflection in the mirror once more. For the first time he was going to meet his Petals as Nash Cinder and a jolt ran though him. This was all he had to offer, but maybe for once he could be enough. Hopefully, she wanted him as much as she wanted Knight.