Chapter 4

 

As I suspected, shopping with my mom was a set-up. As soon as we were far away enough from Sheila, she drilled me. I didn’t give her every detail of our conversation on the plane, but I did tell her the most important parts. Then I told her about Quinn’s advice.

She told me basically the same thing Nate did and then surprised me by tearing up.

“What the hell, Mom?”

“Baby, I don’t know all the details, but I hope you can open your heart again. Maybe this time there will be a different ending.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“I think Bryce is ready for you. It took him a while to know it, and it took him losing you to know how much you mean to him.”

“Okay, Match dot com. Let’s take things slow here. I’m just getting used to being his friend again.”

She nods and drops the subject. The three of us go into almost every little shop in the village. We’re sitting in a coffee shop chatting when my phone goes crazy. Text message and email alerts sound as it rings. Quinn’s face pops up on the screen.

“Hey!”

“Have you checked your email?” she screams.

“Not in a few days, why?”

“Oh my God! Do you remember the pieces we did for World Journalism?”

“Yes.”

“Well, the professor sent us both a message about them. He wants to submit the stories and the photos to a local show. The judges will pick fifteen winners and send them on to a museum, for an exhibit, in Washington, D.C. He thinks we both have a chance at placing!”

“Are you kidding?”

“No, open your email, read it, and call me back.” She hangs up, and I scroll through my messages.

My mom and Sheila bounce excitedly in their chairs when I read the email. Apparently, the deadline is tonight, so I respond to my professor immediately with permission to enter my work and call Quinn back. She does the same.

Excitement bubbles up inside me as I realize what a big deal this could be. Photo Journalism is my dream, and an opportunity like this will be great for my resume.

The three of us are still chatting non-stop when we get back to the condo where the guys are waiting on us. My dad pops some champagne when he hears, and Nate hugs me tightly. Bryce surprises me by picking me up and spinning me around the room with his head buried in my neck. When he sets me down, the look of pride gives me chills.

We celebrate all night and even call Quinn on speakerphone so everyone can congratulate her. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve, so we doubt any submission will be reviewed for at least a few days, but even being considered is awesome.

When everyone goes to bed, I lay in my room daydreaming. This vacation has turned out better than I could have imagined. My door opens slowly, and Bryce slips in quietly. Our eyes meet, and he smiles widely.

“What are you doing?”

“Coming to bed.”

“In here?”

“Yep.”

He slides in next to me and pulls me close. “I can’t sleep down the hall knowing you’re so close. It’s driving me crazy. You belong in my arms.”

“Bryce, what’s happening here?”

“Right now or big picture?”

“Both. I’m really confused. I told you, we’re good. We’re friends again.”

A flash of disappointment crosses his face. “Right now, we’re going to sleep. I’m going to hold you all night and sneak out in the morning. Big picture is still a little blurry. I’ll have more answers for you closer to my graduation, but the end result is you in my life. I know there’s a lot of ground to cover, and there’s a lot to do to heal your wounds, but I’m going to do it. In the end, we’ll be a lot more than friends.”

“That’s a lot of presumptions on your part. I’m a different person now, not the girl that worships the ground you walk on anymore.”

“That’s a good thing. When I looked back and realized I didn’t want a life without you, I decided it was time to worship the ground you walk on, and it’s going to be fun getting to know the new Devon. I suspect she’s a lot of the same but now with more sass.”

I stay quiet and think about all he just said. “Bryce?”

“Hmmm?”

“Is this big picture of yours a long-term strategy? Maybe something I should know more about?”

“Yes, it’s a long-term strategy, and I’ll tell you more when I can.”

“I have a date.”

His body goes rigid, and he rolls us so he is half on top of me. “Excuse me?”

“When we get back from the Orange Bowl in January, I have a date. Not sure why I’m telling you, but some of the things you are saying have me so confused. You sound possessive and determined to have me in your life but haven’t really given me much choice in the matter. Just a few days ago, we hadn’t seen or spoken in forever, and now, you’re talking about us long-term. It’s only fair to tell you, while you plan your life, I’m going to live mine.”

The intensity of his stare sends shivers down my body.

“Cancel the date.”

“No.”

“Cancel the fucking date, Devon.”

“No!”

“Don’t test me, babe. I’ll get creative.”

“Why?”

“Why?”

“Yes, why?

“I told you on that plane. You’re mine, or at least you’re going to be when I break through this wall of hurt I’m responsible for.”

“I’m not yours, Bryce, not anymore.”

“Yes, you are. I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m sorry for breaking the bond we shared. Age difference or not, I should have told you how much you meant to me. I was waiting for you, Devon. I was waiting for you when I fucked up. It took too long to get my shit sorted, and I let you think you didn’t matter, but you did. When I pulled my shit together, it was you who was my guiding light.

“I knew I wasn’t going to marry her, but the baby was still mine. It was too selfish to ask you to be a part of that when you had such a future ahead of you. When you basically fled to Virginia, my heart hurt every day, but I didn’t come to you. I thought it was the right thing to let you move on. But I’m selfish now. That night on your deck, when you kissed me, I meant what I said. I prayed for the next three years that you would feel the same way when you turned eighteen, and the moment you laid eyes on me, I could tell you did. But I fucked up. It’ll forever be burned in my soul that I let you go. But now it’s time to fight for us.”

“I wouldn’t have cared.”

“Come again?”

“I wouldn’t have cared if you had a baby. If you would have told me you didn’t love her and wanted me, I would have done anything for you. I loved you that much. Getting over you was a grieving process. There are still some moments that I think about us and my chest hurts.”

“Jesus Christ, I’m an asshole.”

I stay silent, watching the emotions run through his mind.

“I’m going to fight for us, Devon. You’ll never doubt me again. But please, give me a chance, a real one. Cancel your date. Let me prove to you, and your family, how serious I am.”

My mind goes back to a time when I would have given anything in the world to hear him say something like this. Then I realize, it still means something. I owe it to myself to see where this could go. If he hurts me again, it’ll be different, because now I’m stronger.

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yeah, Bryce, okay. I’ll cancel.”

“Thank you.”

“What happens next?”

A sly grin slips across his face and he lowers himself down. His lips touch mine softly, pecking gently. Then he parts my lips with his tongue and moves his fingers to the base of my neck, pulling me closer. I open and accept him, tasting the mint of his toothpaste and a flavor that’s all him. Our tongues swirl together slowly at first, and then desire takes over and we devour each other. Clutching at his biceps, I silently beg him to never stop. This is the kiss I’ve waited for. My body is on fire wanting more but savoring every stroke.

His pelvis hits my hip, and I feel him hard and hot through his silk pajama pants. Never in my life has my body responded to the touch of a man like this. Grinding into him, I moan lightly as my aching core rubs against his thigh.

He slows our kiss and pulls back slightly, leaning his forehead against mine. Our deep breathing is in sync as we stare at each other. His eyes give me the sign, telling me he’s serious. Devotion, love, and passion are all the things I see as he rubs the back of my neck.

“That’s what happens next. Four and a half years I dreamed of kissing you again.”

My cheeks flush, remembering how awkward I must have been at fifteen with no experience at all.

“Tell me, Devon, do I have nice lips?”

“Yes.”

“Do I know what to do with them?”

Holy Shit! He heard my conversation with Quinn. I bury my face in his neck and nod.

“Good thing because I don’t want to be any part of that loser list. It’s my goal in life to make everything perfect for you from now on.”

“Don’t hurt me again, Bryce.”

“Baby, I’d kill myself before you ever felt another ounce of pain from me. I’m not perfect, but you will never doubt how I feel about you again.”

He rolls us over and kisses a small trail from my earlobe to my collarbone. I fall asleep with a smile on my face.

After Bryce’s declaration, my nerves are in a constant state of flutter. No one around me seems to notice, though. Our little group continues our routine: breakfast, skiing, naps, and games. Bryce still slips into my room every night and leaves by four a.m. We’ve spent countless hours making out, but he always stops me when I try to go further. Instead, he holds me tight, kissing me until I’m breathless, and continuously whispers sweets things in my ear until I fall asleep.

Today is actually Christmas Day, and for some reason, the guys left unusually early to run an errand. I stayed in my pajamas watching old movies with Mom and Sheila. It was almost noon when I jumped in the shower and then got ready for pictures. No matter where we are, family photos are a must on Christmas day.

I hear a few grunts and run into the main living room to see what’s happening.

“What the hell?” I shout as the four men try unsuccessfully to position a nine-foot tree into a stand.

“Loverboy here insisted on a tree! We’ve been all over Colorado trying to find this shit,” Nate cusses as he tries to fix the alignment.

“Fucking dipshit,” Bryce hisses, and when his eyes meet mine, they grow wide. His lips curl in a lopsided grin. His heated gaze sweeps over my body.

“Devon? You think you could put on some clothes?” my dad practically growls.

I look down and jump, turning away. My robe covers me, but it’s still short. Running back to my room, I yell, “To the right! It’s still crooked!”

My brother cusses again, and Bryce laughs.

I choose to wear a gold sweater over black leggings and head back to help.

“Mom, what can I do?” I ask, walking into the kitchen.

“You can get in here and talk to Sheila and me now,” she whispers.

“What about?”

“How about the fact that in the twenty-seven years I’ve been married to your dad, and had two children, he’s never brought me a fully decorated tree, much less to a rented condo! Bryce orchestrated all of this.”

“What?”

“She’s right, Devon. Bryce is smitten. This is all for you.” Sheila slides her arm around my waist.

“This isn’t for me. This is for us, all of us.”

“No, dear, Nate was right earlier. We all know how Bryce feels about you now. He’s absolutely crazy for you. Your dad may be feeling a different way, but Dave and I are thrilled.”

“Sheila, you may be looking into this a bit more than necessary. We had a rough spot, but it’s done. We’re friends again.”

“Ummhmm, dear, you tell yourself that. He’s going full force. Be prepared.” Sheila winks at me and walks into the living room.

My mom watches with a smile on her face as tears pool in her eyes.

“What the hell? Why all these tears?” I groan. “Whose side are you on?”

“There’s no side here. He knows where I stand, and your father is having a hard time with this, as well as Nate.”

“Hard time with what?” I’m beginning to feel like I’m in an alternate universe.

“You’ll see. Baby, you’ll see.”

I start to demand she answer me, but Bryce walks into the kitchen and my breathing stops. He’s dressed head to toe in black, his hair wet from the shower. The growth on his face is trimmed, and his cologne fills the room. I want to jump in his arms and run at the same time. As soon as he sees me, he makes a beeline and lifts me off the ground.

“Merry Christmas, Devon.” His kiss surprises me, but I sink into him. Our lips touch briefly, allowing just a taste of each other before my brother barges in and slaps him on the back of the head.

“Fucking not here! Told you, she’s still my baby sister. You’re looking for a beat down,” Nate chides and pushes us back from one another.

“Nate!”

“No, Devon, Dad is already having an anxiety attack. Mom sees her unicorns and rainbow shit. I want him to prove himself. That’s all I ask. Make sure he deserves you.”

Bryce starts laughing, gripping Nate’s shoulder. “Not even a week and already anxiety attacks? What happens when—”

“Shut your shithole. My dad will hang you. Just be glad you already have family love. Don’t push it.”

Bryce nods with a glimmer in his eye, and Nate looks at me wearily then leaves us.

“I, for one, am not having anxiety attacks. I look forward to everything involved,” my mom says dreamily behind me. I can tell she has a twinkle in her eyes without even looking at her. When she’s gone, his stare grows heated.

“You look amazing. Absolutely gorgeous.” His fingers trail gently down my cheek.

“Thanks, you too. Going for the Johnny Cash look in all black?” I rasp, trying to ignore the tingling his touch causes.

“Yeah, something like that. I want our pictures to be good.”

“I’ll do a great shot with you and your parents. Promise.”

“Babe, I know you will. But I meant us, you and me.”

I open my mouth to respond, and Sheila bustles into the room in a frenzy. “Bryce, you need to confirm our reservations. Your dad and the rest of the guys are useless.”

“Got it, Mom.”

“Bryce?”

“Mom, I need a minute with my girl. Can you do that?”

I swear I hear a sniffle, but my eyes are locked with his. He captures me with a deep gaze. The room is silent, but a buzz of electricity radiates around us.

“Is this really happening?” I ask.

“Absolutely. Every moment of today, and hopefully everyday forward, will be about us.”

“I need time. This is crazy.”

“You have time, then. As much as you need.”

“Should we join our families?”

“Yes, but don’t get weird on me. I need my Devon.”

I swallow hard and push back the tears and anxiety. How the hell did this happen?

I nod, and we head to the living room to celebrate Christmas.

“Devon, are you done yet?” My brother sounds annoyed.

“Just one more.” I adjust the camera and run back to the group.

This should be the last picture, if everyone’s eyes stay open. It’s not my fault I’m compulsive about pictures. To me, the lens of a camera tells a story without words. That’s why I specifically chose photojournalism as my major instead of just journalism. My words usually build on the image, not the other way around.

Once the shot snaps, everyone breaks up and heads inside while I glance back through the images. Bryce comes up behind me and settles his chin on my shoulder.

“You got some great ones.”

“I think so. We’ll upload tonight and see what we want to order.”

“Are you protective over your camera?”

“You have no idea. This is like my baby.” I hold it close to my chest in case he tries to grab it.

“Think you’d let that man over there take a few of just us?” He points to a guy watching us from the porch of the lodge. The man waves and starts walking over.

“You already asked him, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, he’s been waiting for you to finish.”

“Just a few of us, right?”

“He’ll be careful, I promise.”

I nod and give the man a few instructions as he watches me with amusement. Bryce shoves my camera at him and tugs me toward the tree line. Fresh snow covers the greenery around us. My mind instantly goes to how the right positioning will bring in the breathtaking scenery. I’m so wrapped up in deciding on a pose, I don’t notice Bryce lean down and haul me over his shoulder.

“What are you doing?” I scream, beating on his back.

“Making memories.” He spins us around then repositions me so I’m cradled in his arms. The smile on his face is contagious. Without thinking, I lean in and brush my lips across his.

He caresses the back of my neck and pulls me in deeper. The instant his tongue sweeps in and finds mine, he groans. My pulse races, and I clutch his shoulders tightly. Heat and desire run through my veins for this man. I tilt my head to deepen the kiss, just as he pulls back, pecking me lightly and spinning us again.

We both start laughing, and then I realize we have a small audience. Thank God none of them are our families. Bryce sets me back on my feet, and I walk over to the man who has my camera.

“Got some great shots, man. Hope you like them,” he tells Bryce and goes back toward a crowd of people waiting at the edge of the snow-covered deck.

“Do you know him?” I ask.

“Not personally. He’s the resort photographer. I asked a favor.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, babe. I wanted a few of us alone, and it wasn’t a good idea to ask our parents or Nate.”

“Did you know I was going to kiss you?”

“No, but if you didn’t, I would have kissed you. Before you get embarrassed, let’s go eat.” He takes my hand and leads me to the restaurant.

My dad doesn’t hide his scowl when we walk in hand in hand, but my mom whispers something in his ear, which makes him relax. Throughout the meal, Bryce finds a way to touch me as much as possible. The small gestures leave a trail of heat where his fingers touch.

Once dinner is finally over, our parents decide to go to the lounge, and Nate, Bryce, and I head to the condo. I leave them to pick out a movie and call Quinn.

“Merry Christmas, bitch,” she greets me.

“Back at ya, babe. How was your day?”

“You know, the norm. Ate too much, took a nap, listened to my dad yell at the football games. Although, I got a pair of kick ass boots. What about you?”

“It’s been interesting, to say the least.” I tell her about everything that has happened since waking up this morning. She’s a little too quiet when I finish. “Your silence is killing me.”

“I’m pissed! Thrilled to death for you but pissed for me. Who would have thought our first college bowl game experience, you’d have a boyfriend? Who’s gonna be my wingman? And let’s not forget we’re in MIAMI!”

“It’s a little early to say I have a boyfriend.”

“Don’t be an idiot. If what you’re telling me is true, which I know it is, Bryce has staked claim. No going back. Open your eyes and your ears.”

“I’m giving him a chance but also being cautious.”

“Whatever you say, but I know better. Can you still go out on New Year’s Eve?”

“Of course.”

We talk for a few more minutes about mindless things then confirm our plans to meet in Miami. Once we’re off the phone, I change into my pajamas and grab the small gift boxes in my bag.

Nate and Bryce have a fire going and a football game on TV when I join them. The lights are dim, but the tree in the corner illuminates the room beautifully.

“Guys, I have something for you. It’s nothing big, but when I saw these in one of the village shops, I thought of y’all.” I hand them each a box.

Neither of them speaks when they open them but look at me surprised. “I know it’s cheesy, but when I saw them, I thought we could finish the inscription when you both graduate from OCS next year.”

Both look at the keychains and turn them over. One side has the Navy Seal, and the other has their name. I had the shop do a rush order but left enough room for the date to be added.

My brother gets to me first and lifts me up, hugging me tightly. “It’s awesome, Devon. Thank you.” He kisses my temple, setting me down.

Before I can step back, Bryce pushes him aside and lifts me again but gently. He buries his head into my neck and nuzzles me softly. “It’s perfect, just like you.” He leans back and stares into my eyes then, without warning, closes his mouth over mine in a searing kiss. I forget we aren’t alone and allow him to claim my lips. We don’t stop until Nate starts clearing his throat behind us then shoves Bryce.

“Jesus, stop it! I told you I was supportive, but don’t make me regret it. Put her the fuck down.”

Bryce grins against my lips and lowers me, pecking me one more time.

“Okay.” I find my voice. “What are we watching?”

“Football,” they both answer.

“What happened to a movie?”

“Football is better,” Nate answers, propping himself on the couch cushion.

“Okay, I’ll read.” I settle in the middle and open my iPad. It isn’t long before the huge dinner paired with wine catches up to me and I doze off. Bryce pulls me toward him so my head is in his lap, and he strokes my hair lightly. Nate gives him shit, but he doesn’t stop. I stir slightly when my parents come in but don’t wake up.

When Bryce lifts me off the couch, I finally awaken. “No, I want to sleep next to the Christmas tree.”

“On the couch, babe?”

“No, let’s make a pallet on the floor. It’s so beautiful,” I answer sleepily.

“Okay, hold on.” He leaves me and moves around gathering blankets and grabs two pillows from my room.

I join him as he situates himself, partly leaning against the couch. Without thinking too hard, I curl up on him, wrapping my arms around his waist and laying my head on his chest.

“This is nice.”

“Considering it’s the first Christmas I have you in my arms, it’s better than nice. I have something for you, Devon. Can you give me your wrist?”

I extend my arm and feel him digging in his pocket. Then cold metal encircles my skin as he fumbles with a clasp.

When he’s done, I sit up and admire the beautiful charm bracelet. It’s sterling silver with several intertwining links. In the middle is one single charm. It’s the shape of a Christmas tree. The writing on the back is too small for me to see in the muted light, but when I reach for the lamp, he stops me.

“It says todays date.”

“That’s really sweet, Bryce.”

He watches my face and then chuckles. “You don’t get it. It’s our first Christmas together. The tree represents the Aspen Pine.”

Realization hits me. It’s a symbol, a statement, a memory.

“Oh my God.”

“Yeah, babe, I’ll fill up this whole bracelet with our memories.”

“I love it.”

He nods and pulls me back down to his chest, running his fingers through my hair. We don’t go to sleep, though. We talk quietly through the night. I fill him in on my life in Virginia, and he tells me more about the year and a half I missed. We don’t mention Holli or anything remotely upsetting. When I fall asleep again at dawn, I know this is the best Christmas I’ve ever had.