Cass smothered a frustrated cry while Jax’s mouth continued to move against her as if he hadn’t quite processed what she’d said.

She had to make him understand. As valiantly as she’d struggled not to admit what his leaving had done to her, she couldn’t stay quiet any more. It mattered too much.

“All those months you didn’t call or write. You stopped talking to me because you stopped talking to Chase.” She squeezed her wet eyes shut and fell over him, letting out a sob of breath that didn’t touch the inferno of grief and hunger tangling inside her. “I…I thought I’d mattered to you too, but you didn’t care. You became Mr. Big Shot and you forgot about me. I was no one to you. Less than. Then you came back, just to tell me I’d screwed up and he didn’t want me either.”

Sometime during her speech he stopped tonguing her between her legs. The pulse of urgency remained even in the absence of his mouth yet she couldn’t seem to force him back there to finish what he’d started. The more frantic she became, pulling at his hair, shoving him down, the harder he resisted.

Gently, so gently, he eased her back down the wall and enfolded her in his arms. Burying his face in her hair, he clung to her, every bit as tightly as she was clinging to him. “I didn’t know. I swear I didn’t.”

She burrowed into his chest, hiding there when he would’ve nudged her back. She wasn’t ready to face this, let alone talk about it. All this time she’d been so sure she hadn’t cared he’d strolled so easily out of and then back into her life. Wearing that cocky smile and breaking hearts everywhere he went.

Breaking hers.

He pressed kisses to her cheeks, her forehead, her eyelids. He had to taste her tears but he never said, just told her wordlessly that he was sorry. Somehow he conveyed with each brush of his mouth his shock and pain at hurting her, and for once, she believed him.

“Cass,” he breathed, and she heard everything he didn’t say. His apology and his concern throbbed through her like a bright light, chasing away the shadows and fear.

“Just love me,” she begged, half expecting him to throw back some smug response. That was the Jax she knew. This one with his soft, soothing hands and tender kisses scared her to death.

“I do.” He bundled her up before she could think, carting her to the bed she’d given him, laying her out before him and then closing her in with his heavy hips and strong chest. “Let me,” he murmured, and she nodded without even being sure of what he meant. Not consciously, anyway.

“Yes. Please.”

She lifted her arms above her head and watched as he knelt between her legs to unzip his jeans. Drawing down the zipper then sliding off his jeans and boxers, tossing them aside without checking to see where they landed. Then he went to work on her pants, tugging them down her hips, one slow inch at a time, dotting the skin he revealed with gentle kisses. Anchoring her in the here and now and making up for the past. And somehow, offering her the future.

When his lips skated over the panel of silk between her thighs, she gripped the headboard and bowed up, kicking off the pants he’d pulled down her to calves. She wrapped her legs around his lower back, holding him to her while he shimmied down the bed and flicked his tongue against her clit through the cloth. Nudging the panties aside to lick it without a barrier between them, trapping her in the tickling stream of his breath until she squirmed and whimpered.

She helped him remove her bikinis and lifted her fingers to the buttons of her shirt. His hands covered hers and he worked the cotton off her shoulders, caressing her until she tingled all over from his touch. He undid her bra and flung that too, leaving them both naked. Still silent, he invited her forward to where he kneeled in the center of the bed. All she knew was him. His mouth, his fingers, the glitter of his eyes in the darkness. She dug her nails into his roped shoulders and hung on as he parted her thighs again and urged her to open up, to give him everything.

If only he understood that she already had.

He stroked her in long, slow sweeps of his thumb, murmuring his appreciation at her heat. Her wetness. How snug she was. The noises she made when her head fell back and her shoulders shook from the rapture he offered her so easily. She didn’t have to concentrate on feeling good with him. It was an inevitable consequence, especially when his hot lips skated over her nipple and pulled, tightening the invisible cord between her breasts and her clit. She gasped, on the verge of nirvana already.

“Say my name.”

Even caught in bliss, she smiled. Her self-assured boy who had grown into a man when she wasn’t looking would never be able to completely turn off his need to be first. He would always demand for her to scream for him, to prove over and over again that he was the only one who could make her body quake and her vision haze.

And oh God, he was.

“Jax.” Not Jason. If he wanted her to call him the name from his childhood, the one that reminded her of card games played on a hot front porch step in the glare of the summer sun, then she’d do it. She’d do anything he asked. She cupped his cheeks and connected their mouths. “Jax.”

He tipped his forehead to hers and his hand went slack between her thighs. His breath puffed out raggedly. “Damn, I could listen to that for the rest of our lives.”

She pressed closer and tried to ignore the insistent twinge deep in her core. He’d made her like this, so needy and urgent. Finally she gave up and sank her hands in his hair. “Jax? I appreciate that we’re having a moment and all, but can we speed it along?”

His lips curved against hers. “Bossy thing, aren’t you?”

“Oh yeah. I intend to show you how much in about two minutes.”

“Sounds intriguing.”

His fingers began moving again, teasingly now, barely making contact before coasting away to skim over her thighs. Spreading her arousal in his wake, creating little trails that caused goose bumps to rise in the chill from the A/C. She tossed back her head again, bending her body away from his, savoring his grunt of approval at the view the new angle provided. Draped backward in the moonlight, her hair brushing the mattress, nipples thrust high, legs parted. Open to him in every way.

He ruled her lazily, leisurely, and she reveled in every second. Until he caressed her tattoo and jerked hard enough to bump the top of his head into her chin.

“You got ink?” He tipped her back onto the bed to get a better look and her legs sprawled even farther open. But he wasn’t paying attention. He traced the moon and stars tattoo, shifting closer so that the heavy weight of his cock branded her other thigh. “Fuck me twice, that’s hot.” He shot her a speculative look. “I figured you’d go for a tiny, dainty rosebud or something. Why a moon and stars?”

She lifted a shoulder. “They make me think anything’s possible.”

“Anything is.” After sparing her a brief smoldering look, he continued examining her tat. “And you had to get it on your thigh. You’re lucky I don’t go down to the tat place and kick the guy’s ass for touching this much of you.”

She should’ve found his caveman ways off-putting. But since she’d probably be the same if he got a new tattoo by a woman—even another knuckle tat to go with the full set he already had—she just basked. It felt awfully good to know someone wanted her that much. That Jax did.

“Free lesson,” she purred. “Sometimes when a woman says she wants to be wild, she means it. I’m going to get another one soon.”

“Next time I’m going with you. You can squeeze my hand.”

“While you glower and try to look intimidating?”

“Yoda, there is no try.” He scooped her up and shifted their positions, sliding beneath her and reaching his arm over the side for his wallet. He handed her the condom and lifted his hips, allowing her to get the full effect of that magnificent cock backlit by moonlight. “Show me how wild you can be, Chanel.”

The rasp of his voice did unspeakable things to her belly. She accepted the packet with a hand that wasn’t quite steady, embarrassed to admit she’d never done this before. Never covered a man’s erect…member.

Back she went to high school health class in one fell swoop.

“Don’t be shy with me,” he gritted out as she pursed her lips and eyed the thing in front of her as if it might haul off and poke her if she wasn’t careful. “Ever.”

“Shy?” She let out a breezy laugh. “Who, me?”

Before he could snort and break her concentration entirely, she ripped open the foil and got to work. It took some doing but once she’d sheathed him, she released a pleased breath. “I did it.”

“You did.” Only then did she realize he was trembling faintly and had thrown his arm over his eyes.

“Do you buy extra small to look more endowed?”

“Honey, I could wrap it up in a parachute and you’d get the same result. Now if you don’t climb on top of me, I’m about to put you on your back and push your legs up until your toes touch the ceiling.”

Definite merits to that idea.

She straddled him and placed her hands lightly on his torso. He hissed out a breath. She smiled and eased forward, rubbing her very wet center over his leg.

“See what happens when you get me all revved up and don’t follow through?”

He grabbed her around the waist, lifted her and impaled her on his cock in one silky move. They both gasped. “Fuck me,” he demanded, fisting his hand in her hair and dragging her down to thrust his tongue in her mouth, stroking it as deeply as his length sank into her body. “Work that sweet pussy and come all over me before I lose my damn mind.”

She shuddered and rose above him, hating to break the link between their mouths. She’d only been on top once or twice and she’d always been too self-conscious to really go for broke. Now she would.

Rocking tentatively at first, she bit her lip and let her shoulders drop. “You feel so deep,” she murmured, tilting her pelvis and taking more. Inching up, adding a swivel that earned her a low, tormented groan. She clasped him deep within, her inner walls massaging him with every pump of her hips.

“Harder,” he ground out. “Stop holding back.”

She dragged her nails over his muscled torso, using her palms for leverage as she raised and lowered herself on his straining cock. The angle crammed her full of him and she couldn’t breathe without smelling the mingled scents of their arousal. She squeezed around his length, grinding down, using the base of his hard-on and the short, crinkly hairs to stimulate her clit.

Lightning stole through her and she chased it mindlessly, seeking his gaze through the tangled waves that fell over her face. His eyes never wavered from hers and his thumbs pinched her waist, steadying her even while he let her use him for her own satisfaction. She wanted to come so much that she lost her rhythm, and she slid down him with a little cry as she tried to make it happen faster. Understanding what she needed, he closed his legs and lifted them, changing the angle yet again and hitting her just right inside when he plunged.

Crying out, she threw her hair back and reached up to palm her breasts, losing herself in the friction they’d created. Slow and deep, he worked her, taking control from beneath, thrusting up into her again and again. She was so wet that she heard every stroke even as she felt it, along with the groans he didn’t hold back. Every sound he made turned her on more, especially when the crack of his hand on her ass reverberated through her head.

Their gazes locked, and he did it again even more firmly, jockeying his cock inside her so that he manipulated that secret spot that had made her come so hard on his bike. Another slap. And another. She bowed up, clasping her hands to her mouth and sobbing through the spiral of heat building in her core.

The last of her inhibitions fell away as he reared up to nip and bite at her nipples, so roughly that she knew he’d marked her flesh. She stretched her arms up, crossing them behind her head, consumed by the sensation of him pulsing inside her, warning her without words that he was every bit as close to the edge.

“Come.” He wrapped his arms around her torso and yanked her up and down on his cock. “Soak me.”

So dirty. She loved that about him. She moaned and fisted her hand in his shaggy hair, quickening her movements while the avalanche of pleasure descended, swamping her in the hot flood of emotions she’d fought to ignore. Each sensation hit her at once, coalescing in the desperate press of her mouth to his. She held on as his body responded, prolonging her orgasm with his wild strokes.

His hips slammed into hers, toppling her into another climax, one made even stronger by his raw shout of completion. He throbbed out his release and she gasped, scraping her nails down his neck, his shoulder, his back, trying to get more of him inside her to quench the endless ache. Her spasms went on and on and he encouraged them, squeezing her ass with one hand and rubbing her oversensitive clit with the other, doing all the work so that she could just sag in his strong arms and enjoy.

Eventually the pleasure ebbed, but by then he’d cradled her against his chest. She hadn’t realized they’d laid down, but boy, was she glad since she hadn’t been this deliciously light-headed in a long time. She’d probably lost electrolytes or something.

“Are you okay?” he asked after a couple of minutes of heavy breathing and long sighs. He caressed her back. “I should control myself better with you. Am I too rough?”

“Hell no. Are you nuts?”

He chuckled. “That answers that.”

“Don’t you freaking dare control yourself. I’m…fine.” So fine she had trouble connecting words. “I think…was that…?” Giving up, she giggled into the side of his neck, trusting he’d get her meaning. He’d been catching her mental volleys since the day she’d given him a black eye after his ill-advised suggestion they play a punching game on the count of three. He’d known she was going to hit him and he’d still pulled his fist.

She knew he always would. He’d keep her safe, no matter what.

He grinned and stroked her hair. “Yes. That was another of them.”

“That G-spot, wow.”

“Someday I’ll tell you about the prostate.”

She leaned up and cocked her head. “Do you have sites bookmarked on that too?”

“Nah. That one I learned hands-on, since I have the equipment and all.” His lips twitched. “As for the G-spot stuff, the little plastic model vagina I built in science class just didn’t do it justice, so I turned to Internet research. Eventually I turned to physical exploration with fellow female students. You women are voracious about your lessons.”

Since she wasn’t entirely sure he was joking about building a model vagina, she busied herself with easing away to peel off the condom and disposed of it in the trash can beside the bed. “Speaking of equipment, I’m thinking that maybe I should get to know yours better.” She trailed her hand down his abdomen, pleased by the contraction of his muscles. He craved her touch too.

“Uh, babe, I realize you don’t have a dick, but there’s a necessary restorative period after—oh sweet Jesus.”

She smiled and lapped delicately at the head of his cock. “If I deep throat you, will you tease me mercilessly about going back on my threat?”

“Deep…hang on. I’m remembering how to breathe.” He let out a noisy exhale. “There. That’s better. What threat?”

Her hand wrapped around his length. She couldn’t quite manage it, but he seemed to appreciate the silky squeeze she gave him while trying. “To never give you a blowjob. You mentioned arthritis cream.”

“Beds are handy in avoiding injury. This pillowtop mattress should protect your delicate joints if you decide to forego preventative measures.”

Her laughter rippled over his tip, eliciting his groan and the frantic jerk of his hips. Deciding to show him some mercy, she sucked him in and rode her fingers up and down, applying a light, steady pressure. Increasing it in incremental bursts. He gripped the sheets and resisted thrusting, though she could tell from the strain of his forearm muscles and the sheen of sweat on his abs that the effort took a toll.

She slid her mouth back up and took a moment to breathe. Two. Then she feathered her tongue around him, up and down, inhaling the erotic scent of their lovemaking. She slipped lower and traced her fingernail over his balls, smiling at his hiss. That hiss turned into a shout when she explored that part of him with her lips—and teeth. He liked a little pain, she’d discovered, so she gave it to him. Each time she nipped his sensitive flesh he jerked in her hold, but he still didn’t grab her hair and try to take control.

What did it say about her that she ached for him to? She wanted to drive him to the point of no return, a place where he couldn’t worry about hurting her scalp or bruising her throat. She craved to be full of him, almost…forced to pleasure him until her lips were swollen and her jaw sore. Owned by him in the most primal way.

She rolled one of his balls between her lips, then offered the other the same treatment. All the while squeezing his cock in rhythmic pumps. She ran her tongue up the underside of his engorged length, now pointing at an angle away from his body. She’d done that. He’d been playful and sleepy and she’d gotten him hard enough that he couldn’t stop gritting his teeth.

Her clit pulsed. She needed him again. But first, she wanted him to lose control like she had on his bike. Nothing else would satisfy her except his complete sensual decimation.

She leaned forward, her hair tickling his bunched thighs, and blew a stream of air over his cock. A trickle of precum escaped. Her own dripping ice cream cone. She licked it up, making an mmm sound that vibrated around the tip.

Helplessly, his hips lifted. “Suck me,” he ground out.

“Make me,” she murmured, trying to convey with her eyes what she was asking for.

He frowned and swallowed hard. Then he wound both hands in her hair and pushed her head closer to his erection. “Suck me like a bad girl should.”

She couldn’t help it. She giggled. “Come on. Try harder.”

Growling, he yanked on her hair until her roots tingled. Much better. “Fuck me with your mouth. You’re not allowed up until you swallow every drop.”

Oh. Nice. He wanted to go all the way in her throat. She’d never done that either. Blowjobs were normally an appetizer in her world, not the entire entrée.

Good thing she’d brought her appetite.

“Yes, sir.” She widened her lips around the head and he flexed his pelvis, pushing farther. She fluttered her eyelashes at the amount of precum he smeared over her tongue. He tasted good. Salty. So very male.

Then he was forging deeper and she had to relax her throat to take all of him. Panic flared inside her at the press of his swollen flesh and the sudden lack of air, but she took an extra second and focused on the way his hands tightened in her hair. The pain centered her enough to continue.

Not for long though. It was too much. They were both shaking and she couldn’t stop pushing her thighs together. She was throbbing so hard—

“Get up here.”

She barely heard him over the ocean roar in her head. Was he speaking? She hollowed her cheeks and drew him deeper. Deeper still. She swallowed and he groaned, his body going tense under her hands.

“Cass, get up here and give me your pussy.”

The only word she heard was pussy. She moaned softly, knowing full well how the noise would affect him. He yanked on her hair, dragging her off him so roughly that her eyes smarted with tears.

And her pussy clenched.

Her arousal must’ve shown on her face because he made a needy sound and crooked his fingers, beckoning her forward. “On my face. Give that to me before I take it.”

Oh, she wanted him to take it.

He must’ve seen that too, because he grabbed her around the waist and flipped her around, dragging her into position himself and burying his face between her legs. His tongue stabbed into her without finesse, plunging deep to scoop out all the wetness he’d caused. Her throat ached but that didn’t stop her from crawling down his body to fist his cock, from pulling the thick length to her mouth and swallowing him again in one rapid movement. He didn’t stop tonguing her. In fact, he grabbed her ass cheeks and spread them wide, massaging them as he rubbed her pussy all over his face.

She didn’t want to come first. She cried out around his cock, letting out a muffled gasp at the onward surge of his erection in her throat. Needing it there while his fingers explored her entrance, two fingers slipping inside just as she palmed his balls and squeezed.

“Baby,” he rasped against her thigh, biting her. “You’re about to taste my cum.”

That was the whole idea. She craved all of the new experiences he could give her. Including this. Especially this.

She kept up her sexy torment, scraping her nails over his sac, his inner thighs, the base of his cock. Teasing his inflamed skin with flicks of her long, swaying hair. And then finally, sealing her lips around him and moaning as the first blast of his flavor overwhelmed her senses and filled her mouth. A little dripped out and she chased it, wanting it all. The entire time he lapped at her soaked flesh, bringing her closer even while his strung out body shook and bucked.

He pulled on her clit, capturing it with his teeth, and she shuddered above him, shamelessly grinding back onto his face. Still pumping her fingers around his length so that she milked the last of his orgasm onto his thighs at the same time she finally found her own.

“Jax,” she gasped, digging her nails into his thighs.

“You taste so good,” he whispered, proving it by sucking on her quivering slit until she collapsed on top of him.

If he’d plugged her into a light socket, she doubted she could’ve shuddered any more. She couldn’t seem to stop. “Mmm.”

“Even better than ice cream.” He sounded adorably dazed.

She couldn’t help laughing, foolishly pleased when he joined her. She wrapped her arm awkwardly around his leg in her own 69-version of a hug. “So sweet.”

It took a few minutes but she eventually managed to rouse enough to lick up the silvery trails on his legs and belly. When she’d finished, she flashed him a low-lidded look over her shoulder. “I always clean my plate.”

He arrowed his tongue into her once more, somehow coaxing out more moisture. “Me too. And fair warning, Chanel.” His voice rumbled against her center. “I get hungry a lot.”

He woke near dawn with his arms full of warm, sated woman and his feet blanketed with a massive snoring dog. Beside the dog curled the ever-baleful Ming, sleeping with one blue eye open as usual.

Jax grinned and burrowed his face deeper into Cass’s fragrant vanilla-scented hair. Acres of red strands spilled over the pillow and her shoulders and his chest and damn if it didn’t turn him on. Everything did when it came to her. He tightened his hold on her waist, trying to content himself with these stolen moments of pure, unadulterated happiness. They never lasted long.

She finally stirred—probably because he couldn’t stop squeezing her—and let out a muffled yawn.

“Morning.” He kissed her shoulder.

“Is it?”

“Almost.”

“I felt you staring at me.”

His grin widened. “I cannot tell a lie. You look beautifully fucked.”

She rolled on her back and matched his grin with one of her own. “So do you.”

“Absofuckinglutely. I wear that badge with pride.” He nudged down the sheet and stroked the visible marks around her nipple. It tightened just from his inspection. “Damn, that man of yours likes to bite. You should let him spank you.”

“I don’t think it works that way. Besides, I’m pretty sure he already did.” She leaned over and did some biting of her own on his earlobe.

Right on cue, his cock rose insistently against the sheet tangled around his waist. The only reason it hadn’t pleaded its case before now was because he’d been staring at her dopily while she slept, his mind reeling with images of them together on long, lazy summer days at the beach. Taking walks in the fall. Cuddling together by the fire during cold winter nights.

Screwing like minks in the spring—and summer, fall and winter.

“Did you like being spanked?” He kept his tone teasing, but he was genuinely curious. They hadn’t done a lot of talking about this new turn in their relationship the past few weeks and he didn’t want to rush her too fast.

“Mmm. I’d like anything you dished out, Wilder. You have opened me up to an untold world of dirtiness and spanking and biting and I refuse to go back.”

He pressed a kiss to her breast. Keeping his mouth off her body was basically impossible. “I’m sorry about the sex swing.”

She shrugged. “Actually, I think it made me more popular with the book club girls.”

“I could build you one for real. I’m really good with my hammer.”

“So I’ve seen.” She laughed and sifted her fingers through his hair, creating a warmth inside of him that went way beyond the pleasure from her caress. “I’m sorry I called you my handyman. Twice.”

It was his turn to shrug. “Better than your bodyguard or pain in the ass.”

Rather than let her speak, he flicked his tongue over her nipple to distract her. What he was so afraid of her saying, he didn’t know. He’d never been more excited about the future in his life and he didn’t want anything to ruin that feeling. Even her.

But she wouldn’t be deterred. “Jax, we’re going to have to tell Chase. Soon.”

“Tell him what?”

She cocked a brow and gestured. “Uh, this?”

“Oh. Yeah.” After that first night she’d propositioned him in her bedroom, he’d sort of blocked the Chase aspect out of his head, except when he couldn’t—like when he was talking to Chase while having sex with his sister. That had been a complete accident though. “I suppose you’re right. Summer too, huh?”

Cass shuddered. “Yes. I’m not looking forward to that conversation.”

Here it came. “She won’t be happy.” He struggled not to stiffen, then gave it up as hopeless. “Neither of them will.”

Cass laughed. “Hardly. She’s going to think it’s the best thing ever and that we should have a double wedding.”

“You’re serious?”

“I am. It’ll be payback for all the times I’ve teased her and Chase about getting hitched.”

Jax rubbed a hand over his face, trying to picture the four of them hanging out together as couples. Doing things that way permanently. He waited for the telltale noose sensation around his throat, but nope. His airways remained clear.

“Up to you, babe.” He dropped a kiss on her chin before he reached down to roughhouse with his dog. “Don’t forget, it could be a triple. Now that our ’rents are holding joint wiener parties, I don’t see them breaking up anytime soon.”

She groaned before going unnaturally silent. “Wait a second. What’s up to me?”

He stroked Tally’s paws and kissed her soft nose. “What you want to tell everyone, when.”

“Oh.” She paused. “For a minute I thought you meant…”

“Marriage? Yeah, well, I’m cool with it.” He laughed as Tally lumbered to her feet and started licking his face, knocking Ming off the bed in the process.

“Is this related to your speech about us getting together because it made sense?”

And…time for all the happy to detonate. He’d known it was a matter of time.

Unless he just nipped that shit in the bud.

“Look, Cass, I fucked up that whole thing. I should’ve been straight with you and said flat out that you’re my girl and I’m your guy. If you had a problem with that, you should’ve never let me touch you. I don’t play games and I don’t share. You better than anyone should know what I’m about.”

She frowned and tugged up the sheet until his growl had her lowering it again. “Sorry, I should have guessed you’d insist on nudity at all times.”

“You don’t have to be nude at all times. I don’t pull your pants down when you’re behind the ice cream counter, do I?”

Her grin cut the tension between them in a heartbeat. “No, I think I’d remember that.”

“You’re incredibly beautiful, so yeah, I snarl when you hide yourself from me. If I had a million lifetimes, it still wouldn’t be enough time for me to look at you.”

Sniffling, Cass pushed down her sheet even farther. “If you make me cry before I have to go to work, I’ll cut a bitch. And that bitch will be you.”

Grinning, he shook his head. “Way back when, you and Summer used to have such pure mouths. Now you’re halfway to trucker territory, not that I mind one bit. What happened?”

“Life.” She drew up her knees and scooted her butt forward until their faces were close. “There was this guy who turned me into mincemeat and ever since I’ve tried to present this emotionless mask to the world, but I can’t do that anymore. I want to swear and have a good time and maybe even figure out how to use a sex swing without falling off and breaking my tailbone.”

“All good goals,” he managed, trying—and failing—to keep from getting pissed at the first part of that statement. “Cass, that guy was a fucking moron. He never deserved you. If I find out he’s the one who’s been behind the stuff with Triple Scoop, I’m going to kill him.”

She covered his cheeks with her cool, soft hands, making him ache in a way that went way past sex. “He was a moron. No arguments there. But you know what? I’m beginning to think he does deserve me and vice versa. He’s a little pompous and a lot pigheaded, but I can work with that.”

It took him a minute to catch on, and even longer for him to swallow over the sudden grittiness of his throat. “You’re serious? It was me?”

A sly smile crossed her face. “You had me at vaginal orgasm.”

He had to laugh. “Damn. And you call me dirty.”

“Aren’t you?”

“Hell yeah.” He sobered as he pulled her into his arms and tipped her face up to his. “I never wanted to lose you or Chase. He made the decision to push me out of his life—”

“Because he’s a jealous jerk and didn’t realize he should’ve used the competition between you two to work harder, not to shove you away. He figured it out eventually. Almost ten years too late.”

“I should’ve forced the issue. That’s on me. I let him put that distance between us, and I also let him dictate when it ended. I’m not doing that again. I’m an easygoing guy most of the time, and I’m usually willing to wait for people to come to me. Except when it comes to the two of you.”

She stroked her fingers under her eyes and sniffled again. “I have a whole set of Ginsu knives, just so you know. That wasn’t an idle threat before.”

He chuckled and crawled across the bed, dodging his yet again sleeping dog, and grabbed his jeans. After fumbling through his wallet, he tugged out a small picture and held it up. “Recognize this?”

“Oh my God. That’s my fifth grade class picture.” Her gaze shot up to his. “That day, you caught me making out with Robbie Mintz on the playground and told him you’d make him eat a mud pie if he messed with me again.”

“Did he?”

She let out a watery laugh. “No way. He wouldn’t come near me for the rest of the year.”

“See? I get results.”

“You—you carried this with you since—”

“Since the day I took it out of your family photo album in high school. I’ve had it in my wallet ever since.” He cast a look up at the ceiling and sighed. This honesty shit offered huge potential for embarrassment. “I may or may not have slept with it under my pillow when I was homesick.”

“You didn’t.”

“I did.” He tucked her hair behind her ear. “If you think I didn’t spend every day wondering how you were and wishing I was back here with you and Chase, you’re wrong. I can’t say I wasn’t a little bit glad I caught Russ making out with that chick, though I hated that he’d hurt you. You know why?”

“Because you wanted to make him eat a mud pie?”

“Well, there is that.” He grinned. “But mainly, I wanted you for myself. I always fucking have. Since way back before I locked you in that closet and decapitated your Barbie.”

She stared at the picture, blinking hard. “That was you? I always thought it was Chase.”

“I let him take the heat. He deserved it. Dude crushed every pack of HoHos my ma packed in my lunch for a month after I kicked Robbie’s ass. Said I screwed with his cred because Robbie was the most popular kid in class and he wouldn’t pick him first for gym teams afterward.”

She snorted and inched forward to snuggle into his arms. “What cred?”

“Exactly.”

The silence between them grew, not uncomfortably, until she murmured, “I cut your picture out of a magazine once. I wanted to remember you if I never saw your face again for real. But that was just an excuse, because I’d memorized your face a long time ago.” Her chest shook with her exhale. “Part of me was counting down the days for you to come back. The rest of me was dreading it. I couldn’t deal with us being grown up and knowing that you’d always see me as your little sister. You’d always been great at protecting me, and then it happened the very first night you showed up in town.” She sighed. “I wanted to kill you for proving me right.”

“For the record, wanting to rip a dude’s nuts off because he put his tongue down the throat of the girl whose tits you prayed to like they were a religion is not very brother-like. At least outside of Flowers in the Attic.” He shuddered. “Sterling told me about that book. I wouldn’t recommend it for your book party thing.”

She giggled and angled her head to look at him through her disordered curtain of hair. “You liked my tits?”

“Try loved. Love. I’d write a haiku to them right now if I knew what a haiku was.” He tugged down her sheet and cupped one in his hand. “Oh, and by the way? Keep saying the word tits to me and watch what happens.”

“Here I haven’t even found your prostate with my tongue yet.”

“Damn, tongue? I would’ve been thrilled—hell, fucking overjoyed—with just fingers.”

“You know I’ve always been an overachiever.” She knelt and linked her arms around his neck, putting those twin objects of his obsession right at eye level. “Do you miss it?”

“Having my prostate licked? Can’t say I ever have. Yet.”

She smiled, but it didn’t go beyond her luscious lips. Her green eyes were as solemn as he’d ever seen them. “I meant baseball. You walked away from something you love to come back here.”

Because I love you even more. But he didn’t say it. He hadn’t even gotten used to thinking it, and he definitely hadn’t formed an attack yet for coming clean. It was too soon, for one thing, plus his feelings for her bled into his other feelings about his hometown and his best friend and everything else. They were all interconnected.

“I used to love everything about the game. The fans, the screaming, the sound of the bat hitting the ball.” He shut his eyes and let himself remember while his fingers stroked circles on her back. “Every part of it appealed to me. I liked winning. Liked drinking and making money and…” He trailed off, not wanting to be more graphic than necessary.

“The easy access to poontang?”

He cocked one eye open. “That is a word that should never leave those pretty lips.” He grinned and gave in to the urge to kiss her, hard. “But I’m beyond lucky that it does.”

“So that’s a yes?”

“Yeah. Being a local legend is a lot different from seeing your name splashed in People magazine with the latest A-list actress. Even if the relationship never lasted longer than the article on the stands, it was still a thrill. But even that didn’t compare to the game. I love baseball. When that bat’s in my hand, my head is screwed on straighter than it is any other time. I’m there, fully present and accounted for. Nothing else matters.”

“Yet you came back. Not like Chase did. His issues sent him back here, and he stayed. You didn’t have to.”

“No. I didn’t. And truthfully, neither did he. His team wanted him back. He chose to be with Summer. To rebuild his life here. That one out there, it’s glitzy, yes, but it’s hollow. I don’t need screaming fans anymore.”

“The women who witnessed your bare chest routine the other day might beg to differ.”

He had to grin as he tugged on a handful of her hair. “I was putting on a show for you, sweetness. The other women were incidental.”

“Uh huh.”

“You know my ma got sick,” he said softly, gentling his grip on her hair. But he didn’t let it go. “There was no way I was staying out on the road when she needed me. Even after she got better, it served as a wake-up call. I’d already begun to set plans in motion to leave the League when Chase contacted me about the bodyguard agency. That proved to me I was making the right choice to come back to everything—and everyone—I loved.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “The happiest days of my life were in this town. I’m greedy. I want to make more of them.”

“You found out about Russ and me breaking up before you came back to town for good.”

He tipped up her chin and held her gaze. “You bet your perky ass I did. I believe in signs, and all of them led me right back to you.”

She pressed her forehead to his, putting them eye-to-eye. Her heart was racing, but no more than his. Being this close to her was a dream he never wanted to wake up from.

“I wish we could stay in bed today,” she murmured. “Just lock this door and shut the world out. We’ve earned it, don’t you think?”

“Definitely.” He didn’t know if this conversation counted as a big important one in the annals of relationships, but it sure qualified to him. The time had come to show her the shell of his house, and maybe—just maybe—start thinking about how to demonstrate his commitment beyond offering to live between her thighs, as valid as that was as a wooing technique. “But I want to take you somewhere, which necessitates getting dressed and leaving the house. We’ll catch up on the rest later.”

“Tonight?”

He started to agree in the affirmative then hissed out a breath. “Dammit, I have to go into the city tonight with Sterling. We’ll be back late, what with driving time and all.”

“Oh. Okay. No big deal.” She gave him a flirty smile. “Not like you don’t know where I live.”

“Yeah, but I don’t like leaving you alone. I can postpone the trip until we have this thing settled at the shop.”

“Come on, Jax. I’m fine. You’ve got me armed with panic buttons and security cameras. Not to mention the super high-tech alarm system you and Sterling put in earlier this week.”

“What I don’t understand is why you didn’t put one in before.”

“I kept thinking it would stop. Who wants to live a life where you have to be afraid all the time? It’s exhausting being careful every minute of the day.”

“No one wants to live that way, but the key word is live. You have to protect yourself.”

At his long look, she sighed. “Yeah, I know. But it’s such a small town and I still think it’s more of a hassle than anything. I don’t think I’m in danger. If I was, wouldn’t things have escalated by now?”

They have. What did she think last week’s broken window counted as? He might’ve argued the point if he hadn’t been so eager to keep the flush from their conversation in her cheeks. Was it so wrong that he wanted her happy and not concentrating on stressful things?

“Plus, I have another secret weapon,” she went on.

“Yeah? What’s that?”

“Your attack dog.” She snorted in Tally’s direction and his dog twitched her tail. “Besides, you’ll be back tonight. What could happen in a few hours?”

“A lot. I want you to come right upstairs after work and lock yourself in.”

“Stop worrying.” She patted his cheek and started to untangle herself from the sheets.

“Tomorrow, we’re going out to the gun range to practice. I want you armed.”

“Jax, really? Is that necessary?”

“Yes. It really is.” He cupped the back of her head so she had no choice but to meet his eyes. “If something happened to you, do you have any idea what it would do to me?” he asked quietly. “You hired me to keep you safe, and that’s what I’m going to do. Not just for you. For me and Chase and Summer and your dad and everyone else who loves you.”

Something flashed over her face and disappeared before he had time to analyze it. “Nothing’s going to happen to me, baby.”

He lifted a brow. A suspicious man might believe there was something more to her use of the word baby than a sudden rush of warm, fuzzy feelings. A man who happened to make his living studying the movements and motivations of other people, for example.

“I do believe that was a term of endearment, Ms. Dixon.”

“There’s more where that came from if you’re bad. Good’s a lost cause.” She gave him a quick kiss. “I’m going to be late to work unless we hit the road soon, so—” She peered over his shoulder. “Dammit. I knew you broke it. Totally uncalled for.”

Without looking, he knew she was referring to her pink plastic pal. “I’d say I’d buy you another one, but I get irrationally jealous of anything between your thighs but me.” He wrapped his arms around her waist and hauled her straight into the air, nearly toppling them off the mattress.

Cass wriggled in his arms, giggling and shoving. It reminded him of when they were kids, minus the fact they’d never wrestled naked back then. Unfortunately.

Tally, however, was not amused. She took off with a sigh and a swish of her tail.

“So what are you going to offer in trade? Jax, put me down.”

“No way.” He grinned up into her flushed face. “How do you feel about oversized hot tubs?”