Rhett Hawkins walked into the doorway of the viewing room at the funeral home and stopped, feeling like his next step would take him through a time portal. He scanned the many familiar faces in the crowded room, most of whom he hadn’t seen in nearly four years.

The friends who noticed him smiled and waved, but Hawk just couldn’t force his mouth up into his trademark smile to save his soul. Today, he had nothing to smile about.

Maddie Carter was dead and he was pissed at her for not only choosing the Nightstalkers over him, but for dying because of that very choice.

The only thing he had to be thankful for was that the chase was over. He could finally move on with his life. Worrying about her was finished. Emotion swelled in his throat and he flinched as pain sliced through his chest. Loving her was over now too, even though that should’ve ended three and a half months ago when he told her goodbye.

He took the first step into the room and his knees buckled as a sickeningly sweet smell overwhelmed him. Maddie hated roses, but it looked like these people didn’t know that, because there were enough of them in the room to supply every float in the Rose Parade.

His eyes traveled down the long aisle to the memorial set up at the front of the room where dozens and dozens of the ripe, red buds surrounded the huge photo of her in her dress uniform, which stood on an easel.

Maddie’s teasing voice echoed in his head and her green eyes mocked him as he managed to put one foot in front of the other to walk there as if he were in a trance. There was no casket or urn, because her body and the aircraft weren’t recovered from the jungle in Guatemala, where she and two of the four operators with her died.

He only found out where she’d gone down from one of his friends who was still in service with the 160^th SOAR, because the Army insisted she crashed in a training accident during a JTF-Bravo mission in El Salvador. That was the official statement, and one they issued often in this type of situation.

Hawk’s eyes met hers in the photo and his burned as he got closer to the memorial. Why in the hell was I not enough for you? He dragged his eyes away but they fell on the velvet-lined box with her shiny, new posthumous medal, a Silver Star, which sat next to a folded flag on the table beside the easel. Your father should be fucking proud of you now, huh, baby?

Anger burning brighter, he gritted his teeth to hold back the wail of rage and grief that surged up to his lips. Closing his eyes, Hawk sucked in a sharp breath. Her overbearing and hypercritical father was one man he needed to stay away from today.

A firm hand squeezed his shoulder and his breath rushed out as he turned around to meet green eyes very like Maddie’s set in a similar, but masculine face. The second man he needed to avoid, he thought, his fists curling as every muscle in his body went rigid. Her brother, Max, who he’d met once. Max stepped back and stuck out his hand, but Hawk only stared at it as his anger rose higher. He needed to say goodbye and get out of there quickly.

The fact her brother’s eyes were as glassy as Hawk’s had to be, made him feel like this man might actually be sorry his sister was dead. At least someone other than him cared, he thought, watching the other men in the room over his shoulder, who appeared to be there for a social event.

“I’m so sorry, dude,” Max said, his voice choked as his hand dropped back to his side. “We’ll all miss her a lot, but she died doing what she lov—” Max stopped and cleared his throat when Hawk’s eyes bored into his in warning. “Maddie died doing what she wanted to be doing.”

“She died doing what she thought she had to do to impress your father,” Hawk hissed under his breath. “Because you seemed to have the market cornered on his affection.”

“That is not my fault. I didn’t tell her to join the military—in fact, I tried to talk her out of it,” Max said, his shoulders stiffening. “Dad is a tough nut, but he’d have loved her—”

“He doesn’t love anyone but himself or care about anything other than what other people think of him,” Hawk corrected gruffly.

“You’re right,” Max replied with a sigh. “The fact he isn’t here right now, tells me that.”

“Where in the fuck is he? He can’t even show her respect in death? You’d think he’d at least be here soaking up the condolences for attention. Or is that your job?” Hawk asked, his jaw clenched.

Above the collar of his dress uniform Max’s face flushed crimson, making his red hair appear to be flames. A roar rumbled in his chest and he lunged at Hawk, jostling Maddie’s photo on the easel. He spun to catch it and put it back in place, then turned to glare at Hawk.

“The General is an asshole, who I just don’t understand most of the time. But he did come here an hour ago for an in and out, before he went back to base. I’m here to grieve my little sister’s death because I loved her,” he growled, his eyes filling.

“I’m sorry—that was uncalled for,” Hawk said, holding up his hands. Maybe this guy really did care about her. “It just amazes me he doesn’t—didn’t support her more.”

“He didn’t—he rode her like a rented mule and whipped her harder and harder to do more. This is the result and I will never forgive him for that. I’m glad he’s not here, because this might turn into a main event, ending with me in a court martial.”

“I’m glad he’s not here, too. For the same reason,” Hawk said, huffing out a breath.

“I took a thirty-day bereavement leave to think about some things. I may make it permanent,” Max informed, his eyes sliding to Maddie’s photo then back to Hawk. “Four years at West Point, three as a Beret and now nine with Delta is enough.”

That was another reason they were here today. Maddie had been competing with this man all her life, so it was partly his fault too. Him seeming to brag about those accomplishments at her funeral sent Hawk’s anger back to code red.

“Yeah, you don’t have to list your accomplishments to me, bud,” Hawk snarled, his nostrils flaring. “Your sister has…” He swallowed hard. “Had your resume memorized. That is why she was so set on joining the Nightstalkers.”

Max’s hand shot out to grab Hawk’s arm, but he shook him off and stepped back. He took a step forward to put his nose very close to Hawk’s.

“You don’t think my father was hard on me too? Harder even than he was on Maddie?” he asked, his voice rising an octave. “If you think otherwise, you’re mistaken. West Point was not a cake walk, I assure you.”

Hawk thought about that a moment and took his obvious agitation into consideration. He’d never thought about the pressure the General must’ve put on his son too. He was probably right—it had to be ten times worse than what he’d put on his daughter.

“Why are you signing out then? You’ve accomplished what he expected of you, right?” Maddie never would, because she died trying. But this guy was high enough in the chain of command, a Lt. Colonel, to write his own ticket to retirement pretty much.

“If I stayed in until I was seventy and became the Secretary of the Army, I would never meet the General’s expectations. I realize that now and am ready to be off the hamster wheel. Maddie’s death drove that home to me.” The word death seemed to lodge in his throat and his eyes filled. He choked out the words then turned his back to Hawk and his shoulders tensed as he scrubbed a hand over his face.

Maybe Hawk was being too hard on the guy, he thought, stepping forward to put his hand on Max’s shoulder. He had the same upbringing by the General that Maddie had. It could be he had been driven just as hard as she had. Maddie thought everything came easy to Max, but Hawk realized now he just worked his ass off, because his father commanded it.

“I’m sorry for being an asshole, Max. I know you cared about her too.” Hawk dragged in a shuddering breath. “I’m just totally pissed off at the waste…and for what?”

Max turned and gave Hawk a quick man hug, then stepped back. “I hope she knew that too,” he said, swiping at his eyes with his fingers. “That’s what I’m most afraid of—that my little sister died thinking I didn’t care.”

“She knew you loved her,” Hawk said, not really knowing if that was true. The only time Maddie mentioned her brother was to relate some new medal or accomplishment and how her father had reacted. “I know she idolized you.” That was the perfect truth.

“I’m going to Jenson’s memorial tomorrow,” someone behind Hawk said. “It’s weird they didn’t find the aircraft or her body, huh?”

“Gordon and Fields said she was dead, no pulse, and her face was messed up pretty bad, or they’d have carried her out. They took fire, so they had to get out of there.”

“I hope CSAR goes back to look again. If one of the cartels took the helo, why in the hell wouldn’t they just leave her body there? They left Jenson and Smith.”

Why indeed? Hawk thought, glancing at Max, whose eyes were narrowed too.