THIRTEEN
Dom
AS THE NIGHT WORE ON, I made a silent promise to Savanna.
I was going to take care of her girls for her. Triss, Lily, and Daisy were mine to take care of now, and I wouldn’t let her down.
Dawn was starting to peek through the window when I watched Savanna take her last rattling breath. I reached out, taking her chilled hand in mine, and held on until the nurses came into the room. Then I blinked back my tears as I got up and bent to kiss her forehead.
“Don’t worry about your girls, Savanna; I’m going to take care of them.”
After calling the time of her death, I stepped back and pulled out my phone to call Triss. Since I didn’t leave the hospital, I hadn’t texted her, not wanting to disturb her. Now I had to make a call that never got easier, no matter how many times I made it. It was made all the worse this time because it was to the one woman I couldn’t stand to hurt.
Her phone rang four times before she answered, sounding drowsy. “Dom?”
“Triss.” I closed my eyes, dreading this part. “She’s gone, baby.”
“No,” she whispered brokenly. “Please, Dom. No.”
“Do you want me to come and get you? Or would you rather I took care of the details? I’ll do whatever you want, sweetheart.”
“My mind won’t work,” she sobbed out. “I can’t believe she’s gone.”
“I’m so sorry, baby.”
“I don’t know what to do.”
Just hearing her cry was tearing me apart. “I’m going to sign off on everything here, and then I’ll be right there.”
“You’re at the hospital?”
“I stayed with her all night, Triss. I didn’t want her to be alone.”
“Oh, my God. Dom, that’s … Thank you.”
“She was a special woman,” I told her. “Give me an hour and I’ll be over. We can tell the girls together.”
As the day dragged on, I could see that Triss was falling apart. She tried hard to keep on a brave face, but I could tell she was going to break soon.
Lily and Daisy cried themselves to sleep, and as soon as they were tucked into bed, I pulled Triss down the hall to her old room. I had taken a chance, thinking that she would have picked her old room over the master and was glad to see I was right as I shut the door behind us and pulled her into my arms. As soon as my lips touched her forehead, she finally let herself break down.
Each sob that left her cracked my own heart open. Her body shook from the force of it, while I held her tighter, letting her know without words that I would hold her together.
Lifting her in my arms, I carried her over to the bed. I held her with her head pillowed on my chest until her sobs turned into little hiccups, and then her breathing evened out and she fell asleep.
All day, I held her, needing to be close to her.
After arranging to have Savanna’s body sent to the funeral home, I had called my nurse and told her I was going to be out for a while, and to direct my patients to one of the other doctors in my practice. I didn’t know how long I was going to be out, and I didn’t care who got pissed. All that mattered was Triss and the girls.
This was where I was supposed to be. Right there with this woman who still held my heart. She had never let it go.
I held Triss, stroking my fingers up and down her arm until I fell into an exhausted sleep.
--
Small fingers touching my arm jerked me awake sometime later. My eyes snapped open, and I looked up to find Lily standing beside the bed. Her face was pale, and her eyes were swollen from crying for so long. I could hear her sniffling, her little nose running.
“Hi,” she whispered in a pained voice.
“Hello, sweetheart. Can’t sleep?”
She shook her blonde head.
“Want to cuddle with me and Triss?”
Again, I got a head shake. “I’m hungry.”
I realized my own stomach was making growling noises and was surprised it hadn’t woken Triss. None of us had eaten that morning.
Carefully, I untangled myself from under Triss and stood. Leaning back down, I pressed a kiss to her temple then tucked the covers around her before offering Lily my hand. She took it without the slightest hesitation, and my heart gave a painful lurch in my chest.
Holding her fingers like my life depended on it, I took her downstairs. The kitchen was fully stocked, but I had no idea what to feed a six-year-old.
“What would you like?” I asked, showing her the contents of the fridge.
“Can you make grilled cheese?”
“Whatever you want, precious.” I pulled out the cheese and butter, and then went in search of a pan.
Lily pulled a chair over to the stove to assist me. “Triss puts two slices of cheese on it when she makes them,” she instructed when I only placed one slice on the buttered slice of bread.
I quickly added a second piece of cheese.
When it was done, she inspected it then looked up at me expectantly. “Triss cuts off the crust.”
After I carefully cut off the crusts, she continued looking down at the plate, a small frown on her beautiful face.
“She cuts them into two triangles.”
The little square became two triangles. “Perfect?” I asked, holding my breath in case Triss waved some kind of magic spell over the cheese next that would make the grilled cheese taste just right.
After another thorough inspection, she finally nodded her head. “Can I have carrots, too?”
Returning to the fridge, I pulled out a container of carrot sticks. I took out a small handful and placed them beside the grilled cheese. “What’s next?”
“Milk?” Lily asked around a small bite of her sandwich.
“Coming up.”
Once her snack was complete, I pulled out the fixings for a sandwich for myself. My sandwich was stacked high with everything I could find to put on it, and then I sat down across from the little girl with my own glass of milk for my first meal with my daughter.
We ate in silence, but I was okay with that. It gave me time to watch her. The way she ate reminded me of Triss, all dainty and graceful. Everything about her reminded me of Triss. The shape of her nose, the tilt of her chin. Even her ears reminded me of the woman asleep upstairs. She was Triss’s clone.
There was nothing about her looks to suggest that she had gotten even a little of myself, but I was more than fine with that. I didn’t want to taint this precious little girl with the DNA that I had given her. I didn’t want to think about the fact that she tragically shared the same blood that flowed through my mother’s veins.
Fuck, I didn’t want to think about the fact that I shared the same DNA, the same blood, the same evilness that Nancy contained.
When the grilled cheese was all gone and only a few carrots remained, Lily wiped her mouth with a napkin and wrapped her arms around herself. “Do you want to color with me, Dom?”
I could see that she wanted me to, and there was no way I could have turned that sweet little voice down.
She took my hand and led me upstairs to her room as the sun began to go down. There was an entire art station set up on one side of the room. I sat down in one of the small chairs and noticed some of the artwork already hanging on the walls.
Holy shit, my kid had talent.
I sat there, watching as she created a masterpiece just using a case of crayons and a blank piece of paper. Her fingers moved with sureness, like they had a mind of their own. The way she could blend one color into another as if they bent to her will, it was beautiful.
“Don’t you like to color?” she asked after she had been coloring for a while and noticed I had yet to pick up a single crayon.
“I like watching you,” I told her honestly. “How do you do that?”
She shrugged her tiny shoulders. “I just see something in my head and start coloring. It’s easy.”
“Will you color me something?”
She gave me a small smile. “Sure, if you want me to.”
“Can I have the one you’re coloring now?”
She nodded. “Thank you. I’ll put it on my desk at work.”
“Where do you work?”
“I’m a doctor.”
Her face scrunched up as she lifted her eyes from her picture. “Were you my momma’s doctor?”
“No, sweetheart.”
“Oh.” She let out a sad, but relieved sigh. “I don’t like doctors. But you’re nice. Can you be my doctor?”
“I would gladly be your doctor, Lily. If you’re ever sick, just call me and I’ll take good care of you. Okay?”
Lily started to nod when her attention was pulled toward the door.
Turning, I found Triss standing in the doorway. Grief poured off her in waves, but when she saw Lily coloring, a sad smile tilted her lips.
“Looks like you two are busy,” she murmured as she crossed the room. She knelt beside Lily, looking at her picture. “Wow, Lil, that’s so pretty. Want to put this one on the fridge when you’re done?”
She shook her head. “No, I promised it to Dom.”
“Ah. I see.” Her blue-gray eyes lifted to mine, her smile turning shy. “Have you been up long?”
“About an hour,” I assured her. “We haven’t gotten into too much trouble, have we, precious?”
“Nope. Dom made me a grilled cheese and I helped.”
Triss’s eyes widened. “Wow, I bet that was fun.”
“Don’t worry; Lily showed me exactly how you make it, so it was just perfect.” I winked at her, making her blush. “Apparently, you’re a rock star at making grilled cheese.”
That coaxed the tiniest of grins from Triss. “I do make a mean grilled cheese.”
I took her hand and tugged her up then onto my lap. Triss came willingly, if a little shy. “Are you hungry, babe? I’ll go down and fix you something if you want.”
She shook her head, that tiny grin disappearing. “No thanks. I’m not hungry.”
I stroked my hand over her arm, and was rewarded with a sprinkle of goosebumps wherever my fingers touched. “I know you don’t feel up to it, but you have to eat. You don’t want to make yourself sick, Triss.”
Lily’s head snapped up at that, her eyes filling with fear. I instantly regretted my words.
“You can’t get sick, Triss. Please don’t get sick.”
Triss reached over, cupping the girl’s face. “I’m not going to get sick, baby. I promise.”
“You have to eat something. Please?”
I felt more than heard her huff, but she stood. “Okay, I’ll eat. Will that make you feel better?” She shot me a glare. “Both of you?”
“Yes,” Lily and I said at the same time.
I pushed to my feet, not trusting her to eat properly if I wasn’t there to make sure she did. Knowing her, she would only grab a handful of junk food, and then say she ate something nourishing.
“Keep coloring, Lily. I’m going to make Triss something to eat.”
Relief filled her eyes. “Okay.”
I followed Triss downstairs and found her in the pantry, eating cookies straight out of the pack. Shaking my head at her, I pulled her over to the island and down into a chair. Pulling the same fixings I had used for my own sandwich earlier, I made her one. She made a face at the food, but after the first bite, her appetite finally kicked in and she devoured it like she hadn’t eaten in days.
I sat across from her, quietly watching as she ate.
When the last crumb went into her mouth, she made a face at me. “Thank you.”
“That’s why I’m here—to take care of you.” Catching her hand, I lifted it to my lips and kissed her palm. I heard her breath hitch and was thankful when she didn’t pull away. “I’m not going to leave you, Triss. I’m here for you and the girls. Understand?”
Her teeth sank into her bottom lip, but she finally nodded her head. “Okay,” she whispered a little brokenly.