Kelli
At first Gilbert kept his big mouth shut. Kelli held her breath every time he exhaled loudly as if he were about to say something then nothing. Isaiah hadn’t said a word either, and she could only imagine what he might be thinking. Why had she not thought this through better? It never even crossed her mind that Dylan might be there. Of course he would. Even though Gilbert didn’t keep in touch with him anymore, like most people, Dylan had always been very fond of Matt and kept in touch with him, especially after Matt’s mother’s sudden death.
As they drove the relatively short distance back to the hotel, Kelli had begun to relax a little. It appeared Gilbert was going to keep their business where it belonged, between Kelli and him. They’d already driven off the main highway and onto the smaller street where the hotel parking entrance was located when he started talking and her stomach bottomed out.
“You know I know you’re just her bodyguard and all, but if you’re even thinking of getting romantically involved with Kelli, there’s something you should know—”
“Gilbert¸ stop.” Kelli squeezed her eyes shut, willing Gilbert to shut the hell up.
“Why?” Gilbert raised his voice. “Does it make you uncomfortable—?”
“Yes, it does! It’s nobody’s business but ours. This discussion’s been over for years.”
“Not for me!” She heard him pound his hand against the door. “He was my best friend, Kelli. How fucked is that? I’m telling you, Isaiah. Keep her away from your friends, man.”
“Stop it, Gilbert. I mean it.”
“He was like a brother to me!” Gilbert’s continued outburst only made this so much worse.
“Shut up!” She turned in her seat to face him now, before he could say more. “We’ve been over this a million times. It was nothing, and even if it had been, you and I weren’t even together anymore.”
Thankfully, Isaiah must’ve thought the same thing she’d begun to think—that going through the valet might not be a good idea since loud-ass Gilbert might make a scene at the hotel entrance. Isaiah was already parking in the parking lot. The moment the car stopped Kelli got out of the car, praying to God Gilbert would just storm away.
He didn’t.
“You can say it was nothing until you’re blue in the face,” Gilbert said as he got out of the car too. “We both know the truth. But you know what hurts most is you knew how tight he and I were.”
Kelli spun around to face him because she’d had enough. “I’m not discussing this with you right now or ever again, Gilbert. I’m gonna assume this is the alcohol talking because you were the one who wanted to remain friends. You said you were over it. From what I’m hearing right now, it seems like you’re never getting over this. So if tomorrow when you’re sober you still feel the same, then maybe any kind of friendship between you and me just isn’t salvageable.”
Gilbert stared at her for a moment without saying anything then glanced at Isaiah. “Thanks for the ride.”
Isaiah nodded without a word, and Gilbert started to walk away. Kelli exhaled slowly, glad it was over, but just as she’d begun to relax even the slightest bit, to her horror, Gilbert spun around again. “Just keep her away from any guys you’re tight with. It’s a turn-on for her to play you both.”
“Go to hell, Gilbert!” she yelled out, as an unbearable knot was instantly lodged in her throat.
“No, thanks, you’ve already dragged me through that place once, Kelli-Bean.”
He turned and rushed away, finally shutting up, but Kelli knew the damage was done. If Isaiah had any doubt that she was deceitful and someone he should continue to push away, this had just sealed it.
Kelli gathered her thoughts before turning to face Isaiah. She was determined to not tolerate Isaiah judging her harshly or at all for that matter. Regardless of what she’d felt from him all night, he’d made it all too clear, more than once now, nothing beyond possibly something physical could ever happen between them. Pathetically, she was still on the fence about whether or not she’d allow herself to indulge in at least that. But even if she did, she owed him no explanations. Her personal life present and especially past shouldn’t concern him.
Glancing back at him, she shrugged. “Drunks,” she said, dismissing Gilbert’s comments as just that, nothing more than the ramblings of a drunken idiot. With a lift of his brow, she knew immediately Isaiah wouldn’t be so quick to dismiss the comments, and she was ready for him.
“Interesting,” he said as they began walking toward the hotel, since Gilbert had gone in and was out of sight now.
“Not really.” She could already feel the hair on the back of her neck stand as she stared straight ahead. “Some people just get things in their head they can never let go. I’m done discussing this particular subject—have been for years.”
They walked the rest of the way to the hotel, through the lobby, and into the elevators in a complete and awkward silence. Thankfully, the older lady that got in with them, holding her fancy little dog in her arms, made for a convenient distraction. Kelli asked her about her dog, and like most pet owners, the woman was more than happy to elaborate about the fur baby’s breed, name, and age. Kelli was sure the woman would’ve gone on with even more details of her beloved Peaches if they hadn’t gotten to their floor.
Kelli had every intention of fleeing straight to her room the moment they were in their suite, but apparently Isaiah, like Gilbert, wasn’t going to let this go so easily.
“Only thing that surprises me about Gilbert’s drunken rant,” he said as they walked into the suite, “is that you’d ever get involved with someone like Dylan.”
Instantly, her insides lit. As innocuously as the comment was delivered, Kelli knew it was anything but. “Really? That’s the only thing that surprises you?”
“Well—”
“Because his accusing me of being turned on by playing two guys that are close doesn’t surprise you at all?”
He started to open his mouth, but she was too fired up and, in all honesty, didn’t think she could stomach another cleverly veiled judgmental comment from him.
“Obviously, it doesn’t make a difference that I’ve made it more than clear that I never did your brother.”
“I never even brought up my brother—”
“Bullshit!” she said, angry that she still cared so much about what this jerk thought that she was close to tears. “There’s nothing else about Gilbert’s drunk-ass rant that surprised you? Not even the ugly accusations?”
“You never denied them!” He took a step closer to her, but she backed away. “All you said was he hasn’t gotten over it and that you’re done discussing it.”
Her heart sped up as he took another step closer, and she realized she’d backed up into a wall. “I am done discussing it.” She breathed in deeply, refusing to let his stepping even closer to her weaken her. “And I’m done trying to convince you that anything I had with Nathan was insignificant and—
“Insignificant?” He came even closer and searched her eyes with that now proverbial intensity. “You made our weekend feel insignificant when you just disappeared. So what does that word mean to you?”
“Exactly what the word means, Isaiah. Inconsequential. It meant nothing to me. He meant nothing to me. And I’ve said it too many times now. What I felt—feel—for you is anything but insignificant.”
She swallowed hard, chest heaving as he continued to search her eyes so close to her now he could kiss her. Only instead of it exciting her, she wondered if she shouldn’t slap him if he tried.
“Did you cheat on Gilbert with his best friend?”
“Not that it’s any of your business, but no.”
His profound stare bore into her eyes as if he were trying to decide if he believed her or not. He only stopped momentarily when his eyes dropped to her lips and he licked his own. The sight only made her breathing hitch. Who was she kidding? If he leaned in and kissed her, she’d be powerless to stop him.
Kelli hated that, even with all that had transpired between them, she still needed him to believe one thing. “Despite what the circumstances might have you thinking”—her tone weakened with every word—“I don’t get off playing two guys, and I certainly wouldn’t want to come between two brothers. I’m not that kind of girl. It’s clear you don’t believe that. So don’t worry. I won’t be telling you how I feel about you anymore. Not because you asked me to, but because I refuse to ever say it again. I’ll just say this because it’s the truth. I’d never even play Gilbert that way, much less someone I’ve never felt anything so profound for my entire life—you.”
With both his hands against the wall at either side of her head, Isaiah leaned his forehead against hers and closed his eyes, letting out a frustrated breath. “If you knew what it does to me to hear you say what you feel for me, you’d stop for another reason.”
Confused, Kelli felt her brows pinch. “What other reason?”
Isaiah took an even deeper breath, lifting his forehead slightly away from hers to stare in her eyes again. “I don’t understand it myself, so I won’t even try to explain it, Kel. But what it does to me, what it makes me want to give into when I hear you say that . . .”
He paused, giving Kelli a moment to decide if she should say it just one last time, and depending on his reaction, she may repeat it over and over or never again. When Isaiah closed his eyes instead of finishing his sentence, Kelli took a deep breath. “That I love you?”
Isaiah groaned, bringing his hand down to her waist and pulling her to him. “It makes me want to feel how much you do.” He began to lean into her lips then suddenly let go and pulled away. “You said that to Matt too.”
“Because it’s the truth.”
The change in his demeanor was as instantaneous as she expected. His eyes hardened and his brows furrowed. “I’ve never told even one woman that I love her, but you’ve told two men in the span of a couple of days? How many other guys—?”
“Just you and him.” She reached for his hand, knowing she was taking a huge risk, but seeing the disdain in his eyes now, she knew she had to explain. “He’s my brother.”
At first, his brows furrowed even more. Then the hardened expression softened a bit, but it was still suspicious. “Your brother?”
She nodded, restraining herself from getting too excited about the once again sudden change in Isaiah’s demeanor. He brought his hand around her waist again, and the corner of his lips almost twitched in what hinted of a smile.
“He’s my father’s other bastard child,” she said with a frown. “Only unlike with me, my father never told anyone about him, not my other brothers, my mother, or me. So, I’m not even supposed to know about him, and for his own safety, I don’t tell anyone who he is. You can’t share this information with anyone, especially your cousin, who might tell my dad. Please.”
Her heart nearly jumped out of her chest when she saw the genuine smile spread across his face. “You are so fucking beautiful, Kel. It’s maddening.”
She stared at him for a moment, as her heart pounded, not sure how to respond to that; then she did. “I’d apologize for that, but then I feel the same about you. That makes us even.”
Kissing her forehead softly, he inhaled deeply once again. “Say it again,” he whispered as his forehead touched hers, “please.”
For a second, she wasn’t sure what he meant; then it dawned on her. The ache she’d begun to feel at her throat earlier was back, only it was far more suffocating this time.
She tilted her head, pressing her already trembling lips together, and felt her brows pinch. “I love you,” she managed to whisper as the tear slid down her cheek.
He smiled, kissing her forehead again then the corner of her eye and her temple, but he stopped at her mouth and closed his eyes. “I love you too, damn it.”
He kissed her softly, sweetly, so unlike how he’d kissed her a few days ago. This wasn’t about lust or trying to gratify a burning hunger that had reached its boiling point. There was so much more behind this kiss—his touch.
If the circumstances were any different, she might’ve laughed at the frustration that followed such an unexpected declaration. But she couldn’t. While it took her breath away to hear those words from this man—in a good way—it also scared her to death. What did this mean? Was he saying he was giving into his feelings? That he’d do something that only a few hours ago he’d been so hell bent against? Or was he simply indulging himself temporarily?
Most disquieting, did any of that even matter?
Did she believe for even a second she may have the strength to fight anything Isaiah might propose now? Whether it was just for the interim or longer? Never in her life had she felt so weak than when it came to Isaiah. He’d made her feel that way from the very beginning. It was why she’d given into cancelling all her appointments that weekend, why she’d given him her number when she’d said she wouldn’t, and why she’d behaved so shamelessly desperate just to have the chance to explain herself. Now here she was once again giving into him—no matter what this might end up being.
As he continued to kiss her even more profoundly but still just as sweet, she fell deeper into that weakness. “I can’t,” he whispered against her lips in between kisses.
“Don’t ask me to tell you to stop,” she whispered back frantically, but unlike the first time he’d given in to kissing her, she refused to wrap her arms around him.
If he were doing this, he’d be doing it of his own accord. She refused to be the one to push this. He pulled away for a moment, but to Kelli’s surprise it was only to remove his coat. “I won’t.” He pulled his arms out of his jacket then started undoing his tie. His indulging eyes took her in slowly from top to bottom. “I meant I can’t fight this anymore. So unless you ask me to stop, this is happening.”
Kelli tried to calm her accelerated breathing. Her head wanted to ask, “What exactly do you mean by this and what about Nathan?” But her heart feared it’d make him slow down, stop, or even worse, tell her what she feared was happening—that he was only giving into this tonight or maybe for as long as he was stuck guarding her. God knows she’d let him, even if he were honest about that now, but she didn’t want the brutal truth to take from this moment.
Watching anxiously as he took off his shirt revealing his beautifully toned abs and chest, Kelli continued to focus on remaining calm, staying in the now, and enjoying this, instead of questioning what was happening. While her head continued to scream she should stop this to prevent the irrevocable pain she’d unquestionably be in for, her heart grasped on to the fact that he hadn’t just said he wanted her. Isaiah admitted to being in love with her too. That had to mean his doing this wasn’t just in the heat of the moment.
The second his shirt was off, he was all over her again, only his kisses were a little wilder—nowhere near as restrained as when he’d first started kissing her. Kelli kissed him back, matching his intensity and moaning when he sucked her tongue just hard enough it hurt so good. His lips pulled away only to make their way down her chin and neck. After trickling a few sweet kisses down her neck and collar bone, he nipped at her neck just below her ear then whispered, “Turn around.”
For a second, she froze then did as she was told, feeling the ache between her legs begin to pulsate as she turned around for him. Once she faced the wall, he rubbed his erection against her ass as he pulled the zipper to her dress down slowly. His warm mouth at her nape sent shivers down her spine.
“Just to be clear . . . His words against the side of her face made her body tremble in anticipation. “If you disappear on me again, I’ll do what I should’ve done last time.”
He unzipped her dress all the way, and it slid off her effortlessly. His erection against her thin panties now felt even harder—bigger than before.
“I’ll hunt you down, Kel.” The whispered words against her ear were a bit harsher as he slipped his hand into her panties from behind, caressing her ass. “If it’s true you’re in love with me—”
“You know it is.” Her own words, spoken with such conviction, broke her out of the spell she wasn’t even aware she’d fallen into.
Kelli could almost feel him smile against the side of her face as he let out a very satisfied breath. “Then nothing will keep me from you anymore.” He pushed her foot aside with his foot, forcing her to spread her legs. “I’ll figure out how to make this work. You just have to promise to be honest with me about everything.”
An unquenchable moan escaped her as he sunk two fingers inside her. “Bend over,” he ordered, and she obliged, bringing her hands to the wall, palms down. “Promise me you’ll be honest about everything?”
“Yes!”
With one tug, he ripped off her panties, and she heard him unzip his pants. In the next second, he plunged into her, making her cry out. “Is this still your favorite position?” he asked with a groan as he plowed into her again.
“Yes!” She held on to the wall as if for dear life then added, “One of them anyway.”
That slowed him and she could have kicked herself for adding that last part. Of course he’d jump to conclusions. Asking her to be honest with him about everything in the middle of such an intimate moment could mean only one thing. He still had his reservations about whether he could trust her completely or not.
“You’ve since picked up more?” The tenor in his words was noticeably disturbed, despite his continued swaying even harder in and out of her.
“No,” she said, needing to make it clear. “But after that weekend with you, I have more than one now.”
Lowering his hand around her front, he massaged her clit just so that it made her moan again, and she was nearly there. She pounded her palm against the wall because she felt it building so fast she was already crying out.
“Damn, Kel,” he groaned. ‘You’re gonna make me come.”
Just as he said it, she felt herself come undone and cried out again as the familiar explosion blazed throughout her body. It sent violent waves of pleasure through her, and she continued to cry out. Then he pulled out and she felt it: the hot squirts of his orgasm all over her back. Kelli had heard her friends talk about this, and she’d always thought it’d be gross, so she couldn’t believe what a turn-on it was. Of course this being Isaiah who was doing this was probably why. She couldn’t think of a single sexual act she might have with the man that wouldn’t be.
“Sorry, babe,” he said breathlessly. “But I wasn’t exactly anticipating needing condoms this weekend, so I didn’t have any on me.” He paused for a moment as if to try to catch his breath, his hand now pushed against the wall next to Kelli’s. “Only I wasn’t about to let that stop this from happening. We’ll get you cleaned up.”
As soon as they were able to gather themselves, Isaiah pushed himself away from the wall. She turned to see him zip up his pants then pick up his shirt, surprising her when he put it back on too. Even more surprising, he picked up his keys from where he’d set them down on the bar counter. “I’ll be back before you’re even out of the shower.”
“Where are you going?”
He finished running his fingers through his hair then glanced away from the bar mirror, meeting her eyes with a wicked smirk. “To load up on condoms. Trust me. We’re gonna need boxes of them now.”
Kelli’s jaw dropped as he took a few steps toward her then kissed her long and deep as if he hadn’t in a while, before walking toward the door. He stopped just as he opened it and turned back to her. “Order room service. Not only are you gonna need your energy, it’s gonna be a long night for other reasons too. We have a lot to discuss.”
With that, he smiled sweetly at her before walking out. Kelli stood there, unsure how to feel about all this. Even after all his talk of hunting her down and making this work, her vulnerable heart still didn’t know what to expect. For a second, she’d thought maybe his getting dressed meant he’d changed his mind. That maybe him getting his fix had been enough. But then . . .
We have a lot to discuss.
She took a deep breath as she bent over to pick up her clothes from the floor, almost afraid to get too excited. If he were serious about that final comment, this could only mean one thing. Isaiah was taking matters into his own hands now. Whatever reservations he still had about her they were getting out in the open tonight. If he needed to discuss things further, then this wasn’t going to be a onetime deal at all. Kelli now had to decide just how honest she should be with Isaiah—about everything.