“Merewyn Jane Smith!”
The sound of my full name made me cringe, it didn’t matter how old I was when my mother’s shrill voice comes across carrying my name like that my toes curl into my shoes and my neck retracted into my shoulders. I looked up from my chair to see Mom standing there, her hands on her hips, eyes glaring down and her foot tapping at me.
“Yes?”
“Don’t you ‘yes’ me young lady, your father just told me who he saw in the car with you. What are you doing? You are just finishing things with Albert and now you are back onto Jessie!” She scolded
“I am not back on Jessie he drove me home I’ve had a horrible afternoon.”
“Honey I know that you are sad but going after that boy after all he did to your heart when you were seventeen….”
“I was just a kid Mom and I am not going after him he is just a friend for crying out loud. Albert stole seven thousand dollars. Seven thousand!”
“What do you mean he stole money, how?”
“I don’t want to talk about it Mom I am trying to figure out if I want to press charges.”
“You spoke to the police?”
Mom seemed to have calmed down now and she sat on the couch next to my chair.
“I did talk to the police and they don’t honestly think there is anything I can do since it was a joint account.”
“When did you get a joint account with him?”
I sighed and rolled my eyes. This is not what I wanted to be doing. I wanted to sit here in silenced and just think. “The day after he gave me the ring Mom. Please, I do not want to talk about this.”
“That man is trouble and you don’t need that in your life.”
Standing up and pulling my shirt down and straightening my hair out I said, “I can’t do this Mom. I love you but I’m leaving I’ll be back later.”
Mom stood up to follow me, “Dinner is almost ready.”
“Not hungry, bye Mom.”
“Wait Merewyn!”
“Mom no. Just no. If I’m hungry I’ll go get food I just can’t do this now okay!”
I didn’t wait to hear anything else from her, I grabbed my purse on the side table in the hallway and walked over the threshold and slammed the door to the house. I hated fighting, it was never something I did well or enjoyed. But did anyone ever really enjoy fighting? Probably jerks like Albert.
My car started up and as I backed down out of the driveway I saw my mom looking at me in the window. I lowered my eyes to my rear view camera and tried to just focus on escaping. Because that solved everything right, running. If I didn’t have to face the issue then it wouldn’t still be there.
It was as if the car was on auto-pilot and it took me right to the bar. A drink was exactly what was needed after a day like today. I pulled into the open parking space near the front of the door and locked my car and then sauntered in. Blowing off steam was the best idea I’ve had in a long time.
There was an empty bar stool at the end of the bar nearest to the door. It was calling my name and I was going to answer. Tossing my purse on the top of the counter I signal to the bartender and then waited for him to come take my order.
“Evening ma’am what can I get you?”
“A cure for heartbreak?” I asked laughing, “Nah just a rum cocktail, surprise me.”
“Heartbreak huh, I do actually have a cure. Ever hear of HoneySuckle Love?”
“What?” I asked smiling, “Nope never heard of it.”
“Well if you like rum you’re gonna love this.”
I watched the bartender walk back towards the other end of the bar and waited. Maybe I could salvage the night after all.
“Well well, look what the cat brought in.”
That deep sultry voice was back and a chill went up my spine. Oh no not again I thought. Turning around and plastering on a smile I looked up to see Jessie grinning, holding a pool cue, looking down on me.
“Hey Jessie.”
“Merewyn,” he said while tipping his hat and nodding down at me.
“Why are you all dressed up like a cowboy?”
Jessie continued to grin down at me, “This is how I normally look. Does it not appeal to you?”
“Ma’am here’s your drink.” The bartender said causing me to break my attention from Jessie. Turning around I see the glass drink, I smile at the bartender then pick up the cold container and take a sip.
“My goodness this is delicious!” I told the bartender.
“Glad you are enjoying it.” He gave me a nod and then went to talk to another customer.
“HoneySuckle huh?” Jessie said teasingly as he sat down on the stool next to me.
“Yes, and you didn’t ask if that seat was taken, what kind of cowboy are you?”
“Sorry ma’am.” He winked, “Is this seat taken?”
“It is now,” I grinned and then took another drink.
Jessie and I sat there drinking and talking for about twenty minutes. He made me laugh and that felt good. Something I haven’t done in three days.
“Want another drink?” The bartender asked me.
I looked at the drink and then back to my car. “I probably shouldn’t. I gotta drive home.”
“Give her another I walked here so I will drive her home.”
Shaking my head back and forth, “No that won’t work Mom will start her lectures again.”
He clearly ignored me, “Another.”
With a sigh I resolved to let the bartender bring me another drink to help ease my pain.
“So what brought you out to the pool hall tonight?”
“Mom found out I was with you.”
“She still mad?”
He knew my mom held grudges, it had been some years but she still didn’t feel he deserved forgiveness.
“She will die mad. Come on let’s play pool.”
I had been eyeing the pool table for ten minutes and the couple playing just ended. I dashed over to the table and placed my drink on the stand next to the pool cue holders.
“Rack’em or break em?” I asked to Jessie twirling the wooden triangle in his face.
“You rack’em, I’ll crack em.”
“Perfect.” I went over to the far side of the pool table and started organizing the balls. Stripe, solid, stripe, solid. My mind was hard at work making sure I didn’t miss a single pattern and that the solid black eight ball was square in the middle. Once it was perfect I placed it in the ideal spot for Jessie to hit them.
“Care to make a bet?” Jessie asked as he looked up at me from on top of his cue stick.
“Sure, what you want.”
“Winner picks the place we kiss.”
He didn’t leave me the chance to respond before he cracked the white ball I watched it roll towards the triangle shaped balls.
At the end of the night it was six games to five, I lost. When it came time to pay the bill it all happened again. The embarrassment and mortification hit because once again Albert screwed me and this time it was my fault. I left my other debit card at home.
“I got it.” Jessie handed the bartender five twenties and then turned to me. “A little honeysuckle and look at you, you’re flushed, loose and smiling.”
“Hush, just get me home. I need to sleep this off.” I smiled at him and slipped my purse on my arm.
“Not so fast, you lost the bet and I covered your bill. Seems to me like you have some debt to work off.”
“Jessie James, you stop that.”
He leaned his head down and placed his lips hear my ear. I could feel his breath on my skin. “Jessie James? You haven’t called me that since we were teens.”
“You still need to stop,” I whisper back to him.
“Nope, but for tonight I’ll just take you home.”
He reached his hand out and I placed mine softly into his hand. The warmth from his palm gave me shivers and we started walking towards the front door. This week had been a whirl wind of emotions. I woke up engaged one day and living on cloud nine and now I’m ending it drunk and depressed. The tears started to come quickly and they rolled down my cheeks in a feverish storm.
“Baby why are you crying.”
“I’m not your baby, and I’m crying because,” I paused and just looked at him, “because this is just all too much and I am heart broken and holding some other guys hand that isn’t my fiancé. I can’t do this. I just need to go home.”
I didn’t wait to hear what he said, I ran out of the door of the bar and then past my car. I would run home. It would do me some good, clear my head. I never pictured I would be that woman. The woman who couldn’t keep her life together and melted down in public. But here I was, melting down, running, making a huge scene.
Living in Kemah had some advantages, like lots of places to drink, socialize, play, boat, sunbathe and of course run home in a hurry because you just can’t drive.
This was one thing I hated when I was in college, hated living inside Houston. The small towns outside of it were so much better. Hopefully though no one sees me and snaps a picture of me running. I would hate to have that on the front page of the local news. I could just see the headline on Click2Houston’s news station. “Brokenhearted woman runs her pains away.” “Run Merewyn Run!” Or maybe my favorite, “Woman leaves pool hall scared to face reality.”
Not that the last one would actually be a headline, but that was the truth of how I was feeling. When I got home I opened the front door and closed it as quietly as I could. I walked in as quick of a pace as I was able to manage to my bedroom and closed the door, thanking God that no one had caught me. I needed to be alone and I didn’t want anyone to give me their opinions.
As I took my clothes off and tossed them into the dirty laundry basket my cell phone dinged. A text message was coming through one after another. With a frantic hurry I silenced the phone out of fear of waking Mom up and opened up the text application.
Eight missed messages. I knew who they were from before I even looked. Jessie.
Taking a sigh and then opening the messages I began reading.
M come back
I’m sorry
Please get back to me
Are you okay?
M hello?
I won’t push again I am sorry
Please let me know you’re okay
Hello???
I could hear his voice saying all of these messages and I didn’t need that voice in my head. I knew he was worried and since it was iMessages he now knows I’ve read them. So I simply send a reply back,
I’m okay, don’t worry about it, talk later. Bye.
After I pressed send I looked at the message and was confused why did I just say bye? That was a bit rude and I didn’t mean to be.
Bye?
Jessie sent me one word back. So I responded.
Not bye, goodnight.
It made me smile sending that correction and I wasn’t sure why. The ding on my cell phone made my eyes look down to see what came across the screen.
Good, night.
The two words warmed me and then scared me. I was not ready for this at all. So I set my cell phone on my dresser and called it a night.
My pajamas felt silky smooth on my skin and that’s when I realized I really was drunk. I usually didn’t pay that much attention to the types of material I wore. Placing my head on my pillow and closing my eyes I let sleep consume me.
Albert always kept the house at seventy five degrees so when I walked into the door it felt great compared to the heat that the Gulf Coast was putting out. I knew he was in the back yard grilling. He had the best view, the view of the bay. We were going to grill some kabobs and watch the sailboats coming into the bay. He had left a note on the front of the door for me to join him on the back deck. I loved it out there, with the air flowing past the frame it felt like heaven. Brushing past the living room and kitchen quickly I opened the back patio door and smiled at the man I loved.
“Hey you!” I said as I moved over close to him and gave him a kiss.
“Someone is looking sexy tonight.” He responded with, showing me his pearly whites as he grinned. He was only an inch taller than me so he never hurt my neck by making me look up at him.
“Dinner smells amazing. Why didn’t you have me get here an hour ago so I could have helped you prepare it?”
“I wanted to treat you, is that so bad?”
Looking around and shaking my head I easily said, “Nope I love it when I’m spoiled.”
“Take a seat,” he pulled a chair out for me, “I have a surprise for you before we start eating.”
There was a grin as wide as my face on my mouth. He really loved me I could tell and I loved him. He was always doing little surprises and I never could understand how I had been so lucky. “You know you don’t have to keep spoiling me right?”
“Tonight is the last night I promise.”
I watched him turn the kabobs on the grill and then he walked inside. I could see him in the kitchen; it looked like he was pulling out a bottle of wine and two glasses. How perfect. The sunset with a glass of wine. Perfection.
As he came back he looked like he had just been caught getting in trouble. I just grinned up at him and shook my head back and forth laughing.
“Merewyn?”
“Yeah?” The word came out in a breathy tone and I had no idea why. It just felt right.
“How long have we been together?”
What an odd question, “I don’t know a while since school.”
He nodded, “Yeah, and we love each other right?”
“I know I do.” The smile was back on my face and that’s when I saw it. The ring.
Albert placed his right knee on the ground and held up the flute of wine for me and inside there was a ring. It was a pink diamond in a light pink wine. Princess cut, with small begets around the band. “Oh my…”
“Merewyn, I love you and I love us together. Please do me the honors of making me the happiest man alive.”
“Yes, yes yes yes!” I screamed out. I took the wine and was about to put my fingers all into the wine until he stopped me.
“You have to drink it. Then you get the ring.”
A laugh came out of my mouth I turned the flute up and drank the wine. The ring was perfect. I let Albert place it on my finger and it was as if the ring was made for me.
“I love you Albert this is just, the best thing ever.”
“That’s good because I love you too. Now let’s eat and then we can celebrate our good news.”
I woke up with tears in my eyes just like they had been when I had gone to bed each night. I couldn’t dream about him again. It was an amazingly romantic proposal and now I’ll never get the wedding that I had dreamed of that night. The clock on my dresser said six forty in the morning. I had somehow managed to get about six hours of sleep. That will have to be good enough for me to function. I had to go to the bank and change my accounts. But first I had to face my parents and ask for a ride to the bar.
When I sat up in bed the blood rushed from my head and my brain felt like it was being beaten in with a hammer. “Oh ugh.” I groaned out as my hands went to my head and pressed on my temples like a vice.
Then I heard the knock on the door. “Yeah?”
Mom came in the room after she pushed the door open and she grinned at me. “Late night?”
“Not so much late as painful.”
“You didn’t have fun?”
I looked at my mom and knew she was fishing for information. I didn’t want to give her too much ammo so early in the morning.
“I notice your car is missing from the driveway.” The grin on her face was even larger.
“Mom, I didn’t drive home okay, how about you be a pal and get me some breakfast.” Mom’s smile was annoying me; it looked like she was enjoying my pain.
“Alright I’ll go make you some eggs and bacon then we can go get your car. You know that I’ll always be here for you right sweetie.”
“I know Mom, thank you.”
“Of course honey I’ll come get you when breakfast is ready.”
As she closed my door I laid back in bed. It felt good to have my mom take care of me, even if this pain felt horrible in my head.
I opened my mouth and began speaking to the air, “I hate you Albert, and I’m never going to forgive you.”