Zoe
When I wake up, I have no idea what time it is. But I’m pretty sure I ran through a carwash without a car. My cheeks are wind burned, my throat is scratchy and raw, and my mouth is so dry I may have eaten a couple of those evergreen car fresheners along the way.
The only thing that isn’t messed up is Dylan. Having his arms around me has never felt so good, despite how tired I am. I get one eyelid open but the other one’s convinced it’s still nighttime. The bright sunlight peeking through the curtains could convince it otherwise, but it won’t listen.
“How’d we end up in my bed?” I ask Dylan as he traces the letters of my name across my back.
“Mornin’,” he says around a yawn. He doesn’t look like he got much sleep. Something tells me that has everything to do with me. “How are you feeling?”
“Like death.”
Laughing, he leans forward and presses a kiss to my forehead. I’m thankful he doesn’t kiss my pasty lips.
“Do you want water?”
“I want an entire ocean. No, wait. Make it a lake. The salt would make me thirstier.” I peel my other eye open and when my vision comes into focus, I see Dylan staring back at me. He looks worried “What?”
He shakes his head and waits. For what I’m not sure.
“Do I have something on my face? I need to brush my teeth.” I climb out of bed, but he pulls me back and doesn’t let go. “You’re scaring me. What’s wrong, Dylan?”
“Do you remember last night?”
Last night.
It started with the pros and cons list. Shit! I scramble around the bed for my notebook, shoving my arms underneath all the pillows.
Dylan grabs my hands and steadies me. “Relax, Zo.”
I take a deep breath and think about what came next.
I remember getting changed and putting makeup on. Not that it mattered because Letty was hogging all of Dylan’s attention. Her—that girl is why I drank so much. She was all over Dylan and I didn’t like it.
I remember the porch and Kyler.
I met Price.
Whiskey. Or was it scotch? It was amber colored and tasted like absolute shit. But it warmed me from the inside out and made sitting outside in the cold bearable.
Eventually, I came back inside like I was floating on a cloud. I think Kyler carried me. Because I hurt my leg when I fell.
Dylan.
I told Dylan I loved him.
“We’re together,” I tell him. “Like real boyfriend and girlfriend, right?”
“Thank fuck,” he says before he melts back into the mattress.
He thought I’d forgotten. Or more like I wouldn’t remember. God, how much did I drink?
“You okay with that still?”
I’m a terrible person. He shouldn’t even have to ask. Why did I let my guard down and drink so much alcohol? I’ve never behaved like that before. Keely has, many times, but never me.
I’m the good twin.
The responsible twin.
But I was a complete idiot in front of Dylan’s friends and our neighbors.
“Zoe?”
“Sorry, I was going through all the stupid things I did. I’m choosing to blame you.”
“You can blame me all you want if it means nothing’s changed since last night.”
“Nothing’s changed,” I tell him. “I still want to be with you. But can you forget about the stupid things I said?”
He shakes his head and runs his knuckles down my cheek. “Nope. You’re a cute drunk. A little frustrating, but very sexy.”
“Sexy?” I question. “We went to bed with all of our clothes on. Shit, did I throw up on you?”
Laughing, he kisses my cheek. “I want to kiss your lips, but I know you’d be horrified if I did.”
The two times I’ve slept in his bed, I woke up with eye boogers and bad breath. This time, I may even have throw up on myself. If that isn’t love, I don’t know what is. “Hold that thought,” I tell him.
I brush my teeth, wash my face, pry the hair tie out of my knotted hair and try to turn it into something presentable. It ends up being a little less than a birds nest but bushier than a typical ponytail. When I’m no longer a total mess, I go back to bed and climb in beside my boyfriend. That sounds crazy.
“Feel better?”
“Yes, but you couldn’t have gotten much sleep. I won’t be offended if you want to sleep in your own bed from now on.”
“We could always knock the wall down and have one big bedroom.”
I’m not sure I’ll ever be comfortable enough to give up my own space. Maybe that’s something that comes with time, but right now, the thought terrifies me. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. I need someplace to go when you’re driving me crazy.”
“Ah, come on, Zo. I’ve been your boyfriend for less than twenty-four hours. Humor me. Pretend the idea isn’t repulsive.”
I’m tempted to pinch Dylan, but he’ll think I’m completely crazy if I do. I just can’t believe this is really happening. “That sounds so crazy. I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to calling you my boyfriend.”
“Why not?”
“You’ve always been my Dylan.”
“I’ll still be your Dylan. That’s never going to change, Zo.”
As soon as his lips touch my neck, I shiver and grip his biceps. Another hazy memory filters through my groggy brain. “I said something about your muscles, didn’t I?”
“You did. It was pretty amazing.”
“What did I say?”
“That you love my muscles.”
“That’s not terrible.”
“And that walking around without my shirt on makes you hot.”
My face is on fire, I know it is, and I try to bury it against his warm chest. The same one I had verbal diarrhea over a few hours ago. “Never let me drink that much again.”
“Why did you drink so much? It’s not like you.”
“I needed lady balls to go through with Kyler’s plan. He said it’d take less than five minutes to get your attention. Otherwise, you could have woken up in bed with Letty this morning.”
“Zo, I never wanted Letty. I was just being nice because she was the only girl and I didn’t want her to feel awkward. I was hoping you two would hit it off, but you were both jealous of each other.”
Maybe Dylan’s the one who’s suffering from a killer hangover. I’d never pretend I didn’t see green as soon as I saw Letty close to Dylan. Her presence felt threatening, and I wasn’t a fan. But for her to be jealous of me, well that makes absolutely no sense. “I don’t understand. I didn’t even speak to her.”
“You didn’t have to. She knew I wanted you, and that I was pissed Kyler was with you.”
“You told her you liked me?”
“Didn’t have to. Everyone within a five-mile radius knows I care about you.”
“Oh,” is all I can say.
“Yeah, oh.”
This is the part of the night that’s sobering. Because had one thing gone differently, I might not have woken up in bed with Dylan this morning. And that makes me sad. “What if Kyler hadn’t come over? I would have come back inside, and I would have gone to bed thinking you were hooking up with Letty. We wouldn’t have ended up together, Dylan.”
“We can play the ‘what if’ game all we want, but it didn’t work out that way, did it?”
“I guess you’re right.”
“I know I’m right.”
“Well regardless of that mess, did everyone leave? Or are they asleep in our living room?”
“They figured us out and left hours ago.”
“Oh,” I say again.
Dylan leans in and kisses me, sliding his hands underneath my shirt as he does. Goose bumps break out all over my skin. We’ve had sex and slept in the same bed, yet it’s like he’s touching me for the first time.
When he tugs on my leggings, I have to stop him even though I don’t want to.
“What’s wrong, Zo?”
“Nothing.”
I wiggle out of his arms and he rests his head on his hand, watching me. “Something’s bothering you. I can tell.”
“Nothing’s wrong. I think we should wait for sex.”
“I wasn’t trying to have sex with you. I just wanted to touch you.”
“We should wait for the touching, too.”
I expect him to be mad, but he gives me one of his charming lopsided smiles that almost melts my clothes off whether I like it or not. “Don’t do that,” I warn.
“Do what?”
“Look at me like that.”
“Okay, so no touching. No removing clothing. And no looking.”
“Exactly.”
“Zoe,” he says. “What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?”
“We can do whatever you want tonight. Just not right now.”
“Zoe.”
I’m so embarrassed, I’m afraid to look at him. Even a peek out of the corner of my eye is too dangerous. Dylan’s always been able to read me, and he’ll see right through my lame excuses if I try to come up with one.
“Tell me what’s bugging you.”
I’ve already made a fool out of myself last night, surely one more thing won’t make that much of a difference. “I didn’t shave my legs this morning.”
“Of course you didn’t. You just woke up.”
“No, I mean I didn’t shave them yesterday morning.”
“Zoe, I promise I could give two shits about some stubble on your legs.”
“Well, since we’re being so honest, I don’t remember if I shaved them the day before either. I’m practically a hippy in the winter. It’s just so cold in the shower and I try to be fast so it’s less painful. That means I skip shaving sometimes. Okay, a lot of times.”
Dylan laughs so hard, he almost knocks me on the floor. If he thinks I’m joking, he’s in for a rude awakening when he touches me and realizes I have some serious growth to deal with.
When he calms down enough to speak, he grabs my face and kisses me hard on the mouth. I let him because kissing keeps him far away from my legs. He has that little sparkle in his eye I’ve learned to be wary of when he says, “Come, Jane. Tarzan take you back to jungle.”
Before I can yell at him for making fun of me, he has me tossed over his shoulder and he’s running for the bathroom.
I pound my fists against his back, begging him to put me down, but he doesn’t until we’re standing in front of the shower. Slowly, I slide down the length of him and my whole body shutters.
“What are we doing in here?” I try hard not to laugh along with him, and I end up squinting my eyes and mashing my lips together. It only makes him smile wider.
“Relax, Crash. I promise your legs don’t bother me.”
“How long are you going to call me that?”
“Depends how your next death-defying stunt goes.”
“I figured you wouldn’t let it go. A girl breaks one bedpost and it haunts her for life.”
Dylan’s still smiling, but the grin slips off his face as soon as he grabs my hips and hoists me onto the vanity. I wrap my legs around his back and press myself against his hard-on. His eyes almost roll back in his head, but he does his best to keep looking at me.
“You keep doing that and I will take you back to bed. I’ll strip your tight little pants off and make you scream.”
My eyes have never been wider. Boyfriend Dylan is hot. “You want to sex again that bad?”
“I love the way you make a noun a verb,” he says.
“Don’t make fun of me, Dylan. I told you I’m not good at this.”
“Baby, I’m not making fun of you. I want to be inside you so bad my dick aches. But you’re not ready for that. You’re hung up on some silly leg hairs.”
“We can do it.”
“I know we can, Zo. But this isn’t about what I want. It’s about making you comfortable.” My eyes dart around the bathroom. How am I supposed to be comfortable sitting next to the sink with him pressed up against me?
I want us relaxed, too, but the bathroom is far too personal of a place for that to happen.
Like Dylan can read my mind, he cups my cheek and runs the pad of his thumb across my bottom lip. I’m not trying to drive him mad, but I suck the tip of his finger into my mouth.
“Jesus Christ,” he groans. “You need to get in that shower. Now.”
Before I can blink, my shirt’s up and over my head. My unclasped bra falls into the sink, and Dylan’s warm mouth wraps around a nipple. I almost forgot how good his mouth feels on me.
He licks and sucks his way from one side to the other, all while I dig my nails into his scalp and pull at his hair. If I’m not careful, I’ll give him a headache.
Dylan kisses me one more time and then picks me up and sets me in the shower. Before he pulls the shower curtain closed, he says, “Shower. Shave. Do whatever you need to do.”
“W-what?” How he found enough self-control to stop, I have no idea. But I’m not about to ask him. That’ll waste precious time.
“Hurry, baby. I’ll wait here. Do your thing.”
“You’re waiting for me to shave?”
He pulls the curtain back and I’m still standing the way he left me. “Zo, I just need you to hurry. Because when I’m inside you again, I want you focused on how good we are. Nothing else. And I can’t wait much longer.”
“Oh,” I say for the third embarrassing time. How many times will he reduce me to such a pointless response?
He glances at my naked chest and his resolve starts to crumble. He pulls me closer and kisses a path from my collarbone to my earlobe. My back arches until I’m pressed against him, begging for more.
The first little moan that escapes takes me by surprise and my entire body stiffens.
“It’s okay, I like hearing you,” he whispers in my ear.
“You said the second time is like the first, right?” As usual, I can’t shut my brain off.
“In theory—same parts. Same places.”
“But not in reality?”
“This time it’ll be better, because you’re mine now, Zo.”
“You always say the right things when I can never figure out what to say at all.”
“Say what you feel. That’s all I want.”
“Do you think it’ll always be a little awkward because of my brain?”
“Probably,” he admits with a little laugh.
“And you’re okay with that?” I need to be sure.
“Baby, I love awkward more than you know. It’s us. It’s who we are.”
I don’t want Dylan to let me go, but he runs his hands down my back until they’re resting on my hips. He goes no further. “Do your thing and come back to bed,” he says.
“Okay. Give me ten minutes.”
I’m so glad he’s not staying. With my level of klutziness, I’d be so worried he was watching, I’d cut myself, bleeding to death before I ever got to experience round two.
Just to make sure he’s really going back to bed, I peek my head out and watch as Dylan walks out of the bathroom backward, cheating me out of one of my favorite views. I love seeing his face when he enters a room, but it’s even more fun when he’s going in the opposite direction.
Who knew I was an ass girl?