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It Was Always You by Georgie Capron (5)

That Friday night Libby finally had a taste of the local nightlife. A huge group of guests from the hostel decided to hit the local club, Music on the Rocks, after a boozy session in Luca’s bar. Libby spent the night dancing with an American surfer named Bret who had been staying in the hostel that week. It felt so good to let her hair down and lose herself in the music. Luca watched from the side, having joined them after the bar shut for the night, and it felt great to feel the jealousy radiating from him as she moved closer and closer to Bret. She knew it was a bit childish but she couldn’t help it. She wanted Luca to want her. She could tell Bret was seriously into her, but she was enjoying the power-play too much to give in and kiss him. Instead she headed to the bar to order more shots with some Aussie girls who were gathered there. They had danced all night, ending up swimming in various states of undress in the sea.

The next day was spent in a hung-over haze down on the beach, sleeping and swimming, eating and hanging out, while Diego, a Spanish guy who had been at La Casetta for a few days, brought out his guitar and strummed away. Libby sipped on cold beer, her chosen hair of the dog, and listened to the music. It was all so far removed from her normal life; she couldn’t imagine it ever coming to an end. She didn’t want it to.

That evening, Maria was covering Luca in the bar. He had the evening off. Libby saw him heading out through the door and called down to him from the balcony to wait up. She met him on the steps leading down from the hostel.

‘Hey!’

‘Hi.’

‘Are you getting food? Can I join you? What do you fancy? Pizza?’

‘I’m not sure. Yeah probably,’ Luca shrugged.

‘I’m in the mood for a pizza. Let’s go to Marco’s and get one to take away?’

‘OK.’ Luca hardly seemed thrilled at the prospect. He had been off with her all day. She wondered if it was due to her flirtation with Bret – perhaps her tactics had worked? She chattered away to him as they walked down to Marco’s. Placing their orders, they watched as the guy behind the counter loaded up the dough with tomato, mozzarella and pepperoni before shovelling it into the pizza oven. Libby’s mouth watered as the dough rose and the cheese began to bubble, golden brown. Clutching their boxes, they went to sit on the wall overlooking the beach, with an excellent view of what promised to be a glorious sunset.

They sat quietly, eating their pizzas and soaking up the view as the sun sank into the sea. Libby kept up a stream of chatter, but Luca’s responses were fairly monosyllabic. When they had finished eating and the sun had set, they made their way back up towards La Casetta. Luca lagged behind.

Just before they turned the final bend that would lead to the steps and the yellow front door, Libby stopped and turned to face him. Unable to bear the tension any longer she said, ‘So are you going to tell me what’s up?’

Luca stopped. ‘What do you mean?’ His brow was furrowed, his dark eyes looked troubled.

‘Oh come on, Luca! It’s obvious that you are annoyed with me and I want you to tell me why.’

Luca was silent for a few minutes. He gave out a deep sigh. ‘I saw you flirting with Bret last night—’

‘Oh come on. What’s wrong with a bit of harmless flirting?’

‘I know it’s crazy but I can’t help it… It really upset me.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Look Libby, if you are going to make me spell it out for you, then I will. I like you. Not just as a friend, I mean I like you. I really like you.’ He ran his hands through his hair and rubbed his temples. He looked so upset, she realised he must be serious.

Libby’s heart pounded as she realised the implication of what he had just said, feeling overwhelmed at the strength of her reaction to this news. She was ridiculously happy that the crush she had been trying so hard to stifle was in fact reciprocated. But at the same time she realised it was an utterly hopeless case.

‘Oh,’ she said. She couldn’t think of anything else to say.

‘When I saw you dancing with him, I felt so jealous. I had to walk away before I chased after him and punched him in the face.’

Libby looked at him and smiled sheepishly. ‘I had no idea. I’m sorry. It was harmless flirting. It didn’t really mean anything.’

‘It’s not your fault. You don’t like me in the same way, I know that.’ He sighed, looking extremely sorry for himself.

‘That’s not strictly speaking true, Luca.’ She took a deep breath as he looked up at her, a glimmer of curiosity on his face. ‘I thought you weren’t interested in me. Part of the reason I was flirting with Bret was to stop myself from thinking about you. I do like you. Really, I do. My feelings have been getting stronger each day since I arrived. But… I know we would be an absolute disaster. You don’t want a relationship. I don’t think I could move from a friend to a friend with benefits and just be OK with that. I know you don’t believe in monogamy. I’m leaving in a couple of months – it could never end well.’

Luca smiled at her, a dazzling smile that wrenched her heart. He took her hand in his. ‘Libby, I know we haven’t known each other that long, but the truth is I am absolutely crazy about you. I have been thinking about you nonstop every second of every day. First thing in the morning when I wake up I see you, last thing before I go to sleep I see you. I am not interested in any other women.’

‘But you said it yourself; you fall in love and then out of love again just as easily. You are besotted until you are not. I can’t handle that, Luca. I’m either in or I’m out. I can’t set myself up to get hurt.’

‘Look, Libby, what if I changed?’ Luca said. ‘My sisters are always telling me sooner or later I’ll meet someone special and that’ll be it. That I’ll change and she will be the one for me, just like that.’

‘No one ever changes that much,’ Libby sighed. She suddenly felt seriously emotional. She could feel tears welling up in her eyes.

‘I think I can. I will.’ Luca took a step closer to her. ‘Give me a chance?’

‘I don’t know…’

‘Please?’

‘I’m sorry, Luca, I just don’t think it’s a good idea. I don’t want to get hurt.’ He ignored her and took another step towards her. It was so quiet; she was suddenly aware of the sound of her heart hammering against her rib cage. Her head spun with this turn of events.

Time slowed down as Luca inched closer and closer towards her. Electricity thrummed through her body, pulse after pulse. She felt as though a magnetic force was pulling them together. She forgot to breathe. The balmy warm air and the sheer beauty of her surroundings added to the heady sense of longing she was experiencing. She felt absorbed in the magic of the place, of the moment. She tried to force the thought of all the other hundreds of women he had kissed before out of her mind. He took hold of the back of her arms. His mouth was millimetres from hers, hovering irresistibly close to her lips. She could feel his breath on her cheeks. She felt dizzy with lust, dizzy with the musky smell of his aftershave. He stroked the back of her arms with his thumbs, sending thrills down her spine. She thought she might pass out from longing.

Sei bellissima, Libby,’ he whispered. Slowly, he grazed his lips against hers. At the touch of their lips a pulse of electricity kicked through her pelvis with incredible force. Tantalisingly slowly, he brushed his lips with hers once again, so softly it was barely a kiss. Her whole body started to tremble. She was desperate for him to kiss her properly but he refused. He stroked her hair and he moved his kisses to her cheekbone, her temple, her eyelids and then back to her lips. Her body was tingling with longing. After what felt like a thousand torturous kisses he stopped and pulled away. She opened her eyes in confusion, willing him to kiss her again.

‘I think I had better go home,’ Luca said. ‘I’m serious, bellissima, about my feelings for you. I think this could be different for me, I really do. Will you at least think about it?’ Libby was rooted to the spot, speechless. She nodded.

A domani, bellissima, la mia piccola inglesina,’ he said. He lifted her hand and kissed it, before turning on his heel and walking away, leaving her senses reeling.

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