Being away from Brea for three months was hard enough as it is, but watching her in that short as fuck dress was enough to bring me to my knees. She looks incredible tonight, and it’s a reminder of everything I’ve been missing for the past three months. Her toned legs looked tan against the champagne and black lace of her dress. The strappy heels she was wearing will be the star of many of my nightly dreams to come.
When she approached me at the bar and said she didn’t think it was worth talking about what happened, I was ready to throw in the towel and leave. Remembering my conversation with Callum at the stables, I was reminded of how Ellie had kept him at arm’s length. Despite her best attempts, he didn’t give up and eventually broke down her walls.
Brea and I had a lot of catching up to do, and I knew I owed her an apology for what I said the night we had dinner at Callum’s, but I also had questions I needed answers to, too.
When the clock approached midnight, I couldn’t stop myself of being close to her. I was watching her and Lissa together, hugging and sharing their excitement. When she flashed me her beautiful smile, it was like my legs moved on their own accord, needing to be closer to her again.
I knew I was skating the line when I kissed her. I was running the risk from upsetting her and having her push me out completely, but when she kissed me back, I knew I was all in. I was ready to do whatever I had to do to prove to her everything between us is more than friendship. I was ready to tell her I loved her and I would stop at nothing until she was mine.
“Well, look at you. I think that’s the first smile I’ve seen on your face in… oh, I’d say three months.” Sierra laughs, smacking me on the shoulder.
“I’m going to go out on a limb and say our attempt at getting Brea here tonight was a success, huh?”
Wiping the towel along the bar, I get everything wrapped up for closing. Peering over my shoulder, I narrow my eyes at Sierra. “What are you talking about?”
“Oh, you don’t know? Well, it looks like it worked. Lissa, Graham, and I were talking the other night about how sad and depressing you both have been lately. I mean, c’mon. It’s true! That girl has your balls in a vise grip.” Sierra chuckles.
“Seriously,” I grunt, tossing the towel along the bar.
“Whoa, it’s okay. You know how much I like you two together; you were happy with her. Be honest, you’ve been all broody and mopey while she’s been gone, which goes back to what I was saying. That smile on your face I just saw before I pissed you off is the first smile I’ve seen since before you left for Arbor Creek.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I just didn’t realize this whole plan had been orchestrated by the three fucking musketeers.”
Hell, most of the time Brea and I were dating, if we can even call it that, Lissa rode my ass about how I wasn’t good enough for her friend and needed to grow up. I know she came from a good place, but it was like she was expecting things to fail. Like she wanted to remind me when I would break Brea’s heart, like it was inevitable, she would be there to knock me on my ass.
“Don’t act like this isn’t exactly what you’ve been wanting. Hell, how many times have you told me you wish you could see her? All the times we would walk by The Coffee House were obvious, too, by the way. Are you going to talk to her?”
“Yeah, once I finish this up I’m going to give her a ride home and we’re going to talk.”
“Well, then what the hell are you hanging around here for? I’ll take care of this for you, get out of here.”
“Really, are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure. Get out of here. Oh, and do me a favor, don’t say anything stupid again like how it’s only hooking up. Women don’t like to hear that kind of shit.”
Raising my eyebrow at Sierra, I want to laugh. Mostly because I think she is the exception to that statement. “Don’t give me that look. I just didn’t want it with you, and you didn’t either so put a cork in it. Oh, also, make sure she knows that, too.”
“Thanks for finishing up for me. I owe you one,” I say, winking at her as I move to the employee locker rooms where I saw Lissa and Brea take off to.
“You’re damn right you do.” She grins, as she starts shutting down the register.
Before I leave, I quickly check the locker room in case they are still in there. After I come up empty, I head outside only to find Lissa’s car pulled up right by the door. It’s the middle of winter in Chicago, which means the temperatures are in the negative degrees. The dresses they were wearing would likely have them freezing to death.
Holding up the remote to my Range Rover, I click the remote start before the engine roars to life. I hold the keys up as I signal to Brea I’m letting the car warm up a bit. Walking over to the passenger side, I open the door for her and hold my hand out.
“Hi, Lissa,” I say, smiling at her.
Brea looks at me and my hand, smiles, and places her palm in mine. Her hand feels so small and it dawns on me how much I’ve forgotten how this has felt.
“Hi, Mason,” Lissa replies, flashing a wink at me. I know now she had been responsible for getting Brea here tonight. As soon as she knows I know, she throws her head back against the headrest and laughs.
“You don’t keep her out too late, you hear me?” She giggles, knowing it’s already past two in the morning.
“You have my word.” I chuckle before shutting the door.
Walking Brea toward my SUV, I help her in before jogging around the front of the card to slide in.
My hands feel stiff from the cool air. Rubbing them together, I work to add some warmth to them.
“It’s freezing out tonight,” she sighs. I lean forward and turn the heat up on the seat warmers.
“Where should we go?” I ask, peering over to Brea.
“I’ll be honest, I want to talk but I’m feeling exhausted after the long night. My feet hurt and I just want to put on my pajamas. Would you mind if we went to my place and just talked there?”
“No, that sounds perfect.”
We don’t talk on the way to her house. The entire drive there I feel like my thoughts are plaguing me. I’ve had so many things built up in my mind I’ve wanted to say and now none of it seems relevant having her next to me.
When we pull up outside her apartment, we park right next to Lissa. She left just a few minutes before we did so she couldn’t have been here for long. I can tell Brea is tired by watching how slow she takes the stairs in her high heels.
As soon as we push the door open to her apartment, she is quick to bend down and unstrap her heels.
“I’m going to go change quickly. If you want to just hang out here, I’ll be back in just a minute.”
It doesn’t take her long before she changes her clothes. I am surprised to find her with her hair pulled up on the top of her head and her makeup removed from her face. This is the Brea I fell in love with. The woman I loved watching get dressed up for a night out, but was also ready to strip it all off and just relax for a night in. She’s the calm to my crazy at times when my mind would get too loud. She always knows how to keep me level headed.
She tucks her leg beneath her as she crawls next to me on the couch. Pulling the blanket over her lap, she faces me on the other end of the couch and I recline back on the sofa.
“You look so beautiful when you’re like this. Stripped down, showing me who you are beneath it all. You let me see the real you instead of the version the rest of the world gets to see.”
She gives me a sad smile before looking at her hands. I sense she isn’t sure what to say, or how to even start, so I decide to do that for her.
“Listen, I know things went down terribly when we were in Arbor Creek, and I’m sorry for what I said at Callum’s. I was hurt and it was uncalled for. I’m sorry for not only saying that in front of my father, but for how it made you feel. I hope you know what happened between us was more than just a hook-up for me.”
She tilts her head up to look at mine, and her eyes search my face like she’s trying to gauge whether I’m being truthful or not.
“Why?”
I narrow my eyes at her. “I heard you talking to my mom in the kitchen that morning. Hearing her tell you how I was feeling about you and for you to say we were just friends felt like a punch to the gut.”
I can tell when she realizes what I had heard. “We never talked about what we were after I got home from Cleveland.”
“I told you before you left I wasn’t going anywhere. I didn’t. You’re the only person I want to be with. Since that night at Dean’s when you gave yourself to me, I’ve only been with you. Hell, Brea, it’s always only been you.”
“Mason,” she says, and I can tell I broke through to her. The tears well up in her eyes as she runs her fingers beneath them, wiping away the errant tears.
“Do you still trust me?”
She seems to think about it for a moment and it worries me, knowing how much trust means to Brea.
“Yes,” she says with absolute conviction.
“You asked me to promise you that night nothing would change and I couldn’t, B. I couldn’t. If I’m being honest with you, I’ve been in love with you since before that night. All I’ve ever wanted was you. I know I’ve done a shit job of showing you through my actions. Yeah, I might not always get it right but I’m trying. You can’t tell me when you think about all the times we were together, you didn’t feel it.”
She moves the blanket from her lap and crawls across the couch to where I’m sitting, climbing up on my lap so she’s straddling me. Easing her hand down beside us, she pulls the lever to the recliner, pushing it backward.
“Do you really mean that?” she asks, looking down at me. A strand of her hair falling forward is pressed against the side of her cheek.
Using my hand, I push back the strands so that I can see her face and look her straight in the eye.
“Brea, I love you. I swear to you it will only ever be you. You’re my best friend. I love how when you’re cold, you curl up next to me. I love how you are so outgoing with everyone, but you only show who you truly are to a select few people. You’ve been guarded, and I understand why, because of the lies you’ve had to face. I promise you though, you don’t have to lock up your heart anymore. I will always be here to take care of you.”
Running her hand along my cheek, I relish in the feel of her warm skin against my mine. She traces the pad of her thumb along my lower lip before leaning forward, pressing a soft kiss against my lips.
Skating both of my hands along her hips and up her back, I pull her in closer, deepening the kiss. The salty mix of her tears combined with the taste on her lips that is uniquely Brea. I will never get enough of her.
Keeping her head pressed against mine, she leans back far enough so we can see each other. The love I see shining hits me like a slam to the chest.
“I love you, too,” she breathes as another tear streams down her face.
I can’t help but smile. Running my thumbs underneath her eyes, I wipe away the moisture. “Why are you crying, baby?”
“I’m just happy,” she says, smiling at me. “I’ve waited for you to tell me those words for so long.”
“Good,” I say, pulling her closer and pressing another kiss against her lips, “because so have I.”
Rolling over, my hand meets the silky-smooth hair draped over the pillow next to me. My mind registers the soft sound of Brea’s breathing next to me.
Memories of last night filter through my mind, remembering how we made up after we got back to her place. Then, when we were done, we made up for lost time after that.
Brea’s warm body curls against my side as I slide my arm over my face, using it to shield my eyes from the bright sunlight. I’m careful not to wake her as I turn my head toward her.
Her long eyelashes feather out across her skin as her hand presses against her cheek. I take in the small pout of her lips and the light freckles that pepper her nose. I’ve always loved how she has shown me all the layers of her.
I lose track of how long I lie here watching her, appreciating the feel of having her close to me. She’s felt so far away for too long. I’m almost scared when she wakes up, it’ll all be a dream.
“You’re staring,” she mumbles quietly.
My chest vibrates beneath my quiet chuckle I hadn’t realized she was awake. Although I can’t find it in me to care that I’ve been caught looking.
“You’re breathtaking.”
She peeks one eye open before slowly opening the other. Blinking slowly, she adjusts her eyes to the rays of sunshine peeking in through the window.
Running my thumb along the curve of her cheek, I press my mouth against hers. She groans quietly before I swallow them down. I know she doesn’t like how I’m kissing her when she hasn’t brushed her teeth but I don’t care. I’ve been without her for too long, watching her from a distance. Now that I have her back, I’m going to take advantage of it.
At least until I wake up and this all goes away.
I roll back onto my pillow and pull her over with me, so she’s resting her chin on my chest.
“Good morning.” I grin, taking in her sleepy face. I can see the thoughts and questions swirling in her eyes.
“What’s on your mind?”
We’ve spent so much time apart. We’ve always been so open and honest with each other, except where our feelings are concerned. I’m not going to let that happen again.
“I guess I’m just curious what you were up to while we were… apart.”
“I was a miserable fucking mess.” I laugh, but the truth is it doesn’t even begin to say it.
I can see the hurt on her face before she quickly covers it up with a sad smile.
“It’s still surreal, having you here, in my bed. It wasn’t easy being apart, seeing pictures of you online, hearing from other people what you’ve been up to. It felt like everyone knew more about my best friend than I did and I hated it.”
“I don’t know what you heard or what people were saying, but I was someone no one wanted to be around. You can ask Graham. I don’t know if we’ve ever fought so much in all our years as friends. I think he helped Lissa get us together again only so he wouldn’t have to put up with me.”
“You want to know what I was up to?” I ask, going back to her earlier question.
She nods her head from where her it’s resting on her fist, looking down at me waiting for me to answer.
“I didn’t do much of anything, if I’m honest. If I wasn’t at school, I was at Velvet or here. No one wanted to be around me, not Graham or Dean. After you quit working at Velvet, I couldn’t bring myself to be there. I felt like shit because I knew Craig counted on me but I told him I needed more time off.”
“I ended up missing my shift back at work. He apparently blew up my phone but, uh…I accidentally broke it trying to keep myself from calling you. I wanted to give you your space and that’s the only way I knew how. Anyway, Sierra showed up over here looking for me and found me halfway through a bottle of whiskey.”
“I know you don’t like her and I don’t blame you. If you don’t want me to be friends with her, I won’t. I guess I just felt alone so I opened up to her and told her what happened. You should know when I was done, she actually told me I deserved it and called me an asshole.”
Brea’s mouth curves up a little hearing that last tidbit.
“I guess she’s not so bad,” she jokes.
“Mhm,” I hum, shaking my head at her.
Brea’s face turns serious and I wait for what she is going to say next. Whatever it is, I know it’s important.
“It’s not fair though, for you to take all the blame. I lied to you and I hate myself for it. After you stopped calling, I told myself I deserved for you to give up on me. On us. Why wouldn’t you after what I said? It was a lie, Mason. I didn’t mean it for a second. You’re all I’ve ever wanted.”
“Don’t,” I command, hating the way she’s being hard on herself. “I knew you didn’t mean it. We may have avoided our feelings by not admitting them out loud, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t feel it. I have always felt your love, B.”
Hearing me use the nickname people close to Brea have used has a smile stretching across her face.
“Say it again.”
I pause for a second. My brows furrow as I tilt my head in question.
“I have always felt your love…”
“That’s not what I meant,” she says, scooting closer, pressing her hands against my face, holding my attention.
“What part?” I ask, playing stupid.
Her face turns stone cold as she squints her eyes at me, not impressed. The subtle smirk on her face proves although she is not liking my game, she is playing along.
“I’ve always felt your love, B.”
I barely have a chance to finish when her lips crash against mine. Sliding her leg over my hip, she climbs on top of me.
Having her heat pressed against my dick has me turning hard in an instant. I know she feels it, too, as she rubs herself over my cock letting out a whimper.
Those moans, I swear to God those moans.
She’s ruined me.