The week moved so slowly, it felt like a year. I sat down in my office chair, ready to go over the last few websites on the lifestyle. In the past few days, I had learned a lot about the BDSM lifestyle and was ready to let Sam know how I felt. Lemon lay down on my feet. Her dog bed was huge, but she always needed to lie on my feet while I worked. I had a fresh cup of hot chocolate and opened a new bag of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.

I was supposed to be reviewing the latest program Neal had Research and Development working on. I couldn’t bring myself to work on it. Last week, before Sam kissed me senseless, he’d asked me to do more research then said he would call me in a week to see if I was interested.

I clicked on another website that was explaining blood play. I think all the blood left my body. No way was I ever taking part in blood play. I had been making a spreadsheet of pros and cons, and after clicking to get out of that website, I added a third column to the spreadsheet: Hell Fucking No.

The next link I clicked was about bondage. I was so engrossed in my reading that when the phone rang, I jumped, accidentally kicking Lemon. She took off, sounding as if she were grumbling. My hand knocked over my hot cocoa.

I quickly grabbed my phone, saving it from the hot cocoa. Not noticing how late it was, I assumed it was Jessica, calling to find out how my research was going. She called me every night for the CliffsNotes version and to tell me a bunch more statistics she had researched. When I answered, I must have sounded like I’d just finished a marathon.

“Hello?”

“Is everything okay?” the deep, sexy voice asked. “You sound like you need help.”

“Sorry. Everything is fine. Can you hold a sec?” Without waiting for Sam to answer, I ran to the bathroom to get a towel. It was an extreme circumstance. The hot cocoa was going toward the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups and my computer. Both needed to be saved. I made it back and cleaned up everything.

I was hoping Sam was still on the phone. “Are you still there?” I still hadn’t bounced back from the running. I really needed to work out. There was no reason for me to be out of breath after that little run and clean up.

I heard his deep voice chuckle. “Yes, are you okay? Do I need to send help?”

Even though I’d waited for his call all week, I was extremely nervous and had no clue what to say. “Sorry about that. The phone startled me. I spilled my hot cocoa near my computer and Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.”

“I wanted to make sure you were okay. Heaven forbid something happen to your Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.”

“I’m all right, and if something happened to them, I wouldn’t be able to finish working tonight. I can’t work unless I have them.” My ego was bruised by the incident. Instead of being ready, my clumsy self had made an appearance by spilling stuff and scaring poor Lemon half to death.

“Now that we know you are not under attack, have you done any research this week?”

Wow, I guess we are jumping into the deep end of this conversation. No “How was your week?” or “What did you do today?”

Suddenly feeling shy, I whispered, “Yes.” Not quite sure why I whispered it. Not like Lemon would judge me or tell someone.

Sam chuckled. I didn’t know why he was enjoying laughing at me so much. It was starting to really make me think he didn’t want to see me again. That put a twinge in my stomach.

“Do you have people over, or are you alone?”

“I’m alone. Why?”

“You whispered your answer like you didn’t want someone to hear. I was making sure you were alone and I had all your full attention. Did you like what you researched, or is this something that doesn’t interest you? I will not push you into the lifestyle. I’m attracted to you and hope you are interested.”

Wow… did he say he was attracted to me? I kind of tuned everything else out when he said that. “You’re attracted to me?”

“Yes, I’m attracted to you. See anything you like or dislike when you researched?”

“I made a pro, con, and ‘hell to the fuck no’ list.”

“Good. I will pick you up tomorrow around seven for dinner. Bring your list, and we’ll discuss it over dinner.”

“You have to be kidding! Who considers future sex acts over their first dinner date? Wait—is this a date? Or did I stick my foot in my mouth?” I didn’t think I could do the things I’d seen online without dating the person first. I wasn’t the type of person to walk into a club and be like “Let’s pick a flavor, and then you pick something off my pros list.”

“Yes, it’s a date. We will discuss your pros and cons list after dinner. We will not be playing together until we have formed a relationship we can trust. What we did the other night was hard for me and not how I wanted to introduce you to the lifestyle.”

“Does this mean you will still be playing with other people until you have my trust?” That was not the way to earn my trust. I didn’t like to share—never did as a kid and sure as hell not as an adult. Sam was sexy, and there was no way I could sit around and watch him with someone else.

* * *

I could hear the uneasiness in her voice when she asked if I would still go to the club with other women. In my younger days, there would have been no question. I always did no strings attached. Something about Patty made me want to change and start to see what life could turn out like.

It was too early to think Patty would be the one. But I needed to try. I wanted to come home to someone at night and talk about my day. When one of our missions goes sideways, it would be nice to go home to someone and talk about how the mission failed. Not some strange women off the street or in the club.

“No, there will be no other women. Only you. I don’t think I could handle you and anyone else at the same time. You seem to be a troublemaker with your breaking and entering and trying to start a fight club.”

Patty huffed before going off on a rant. “I don’t get into trouble that often. Everyone always thinks we should follow all these rules. Rules are annoying and take time to get around. I find a way to get what I want in a shorter time. I wasn’t planning on attacking Doug. I planned to get the information I needed and then relay it back to Jessica. When I saw him with another woman, I lost it.”

“How did that work out for you last week when you blew your cover and upset Jessica?”

There was silence on the other end. Maybe I went too far. I worried someone wouldn’t be there to catch her when she was doing things wrong and that she would really get hurt.

“Patty, you there? I’m sorry if I upset you. What you did last week had me scared. Doug was bigger than you. You could have been hurt. You also didn’t know if he had friends in the club that would have hurt you.”

It felt like ten minutes before Patty spoke. Her voice cracked, and she was sniffling. I hadn’t meant to make her cry. I’d just wanted her to realize what she’d done.

“I know I messed up. Jessica was mad at me, and that’s harder than anything else when she’s mad or disappointed in me. I will try to think my plans through better in the future or ask for help.”

“I will always help you, if you need it. No matter what comes out of us trying to date.”

“We’re dating? But you’re sex on a stick, and I’m an IT hacker with funky hair. You work to put bad people away. I sometimes skirt the law to get what I want. I also apparently have no filter.”

When she finished talking, I heard a loud bang and immediately went on alert. It sounded like someone had broken into her place. Then she screamed. “Fuck…”

“What happened? Are you okay? Do I need to come over?” I was ready to grab my keys and head toward her house when she finally replied.

“No, I hit something. I’m fine. I don’t want to talk about what just happened.”

Though I wasn’t quite sure she was okay, she’d asked me to drop the conversation about the noise, so I did. “Yes, we will start seeing each other, and I hope it turns into something.”

“Okay.”

“Great. I will see you tomorrow night at seven.”

“Bye.”

“Bye.”

I clicked off the phone and reclined back in my office chair. All week, I’d looked forward to our conversation. It’d taken everything in me not to call Patty earlier in the week to see if she was still interested.

When Brock walked in and flopped down on the chair in front of my desk, I had the biggest smile on my face. I didn’t give a shit if he was about to give me crap.

“I take it you finally called her,” Brock said. He was fiddling with some papers in his right hand.

“Yes, we are going on a date tomorrow, and then we will talk about the research she has done.” Brock was shifting in his seat, and I could tell something was on his mind. I thought I probably wasn’t going to like it.

“What’s going on?”

“I don’t think the man we arrested is our guy. Something isn’t adding up with his story.” The team had been working the last few months to catch a serial killer. We finally got a break this week when he left fingerprints on his latest victim.

“Why do you think we have the wrong suspect?” This case had already drained me for the last few months and looked like it would open back up. Brock set a grainy photo on my desk.

“This picture was taken last week. The photo shows our suspect in another state when the victim died.”

“Keep digging into this and see what you can find. Pull whatever you can, and we will meet as a team tomorrow morning to talk about it.”