Chapter 4

Nick, Gabe and their cousin Whitney had made a point to have dinner together often, and tonight worked for them all. Nick sat with his brother and Whitney at the kitchen table in her condo. The place was functional, suited to his cousin, who couldn’t be bothered with decor.

“So, cuz, all ready for the PPD next week?” she asked as she took another helping from the carton filled with moo goo gai pan.

Gabe’s gaze slid to Nick. “It’s, um, been postponed.”

“What?”

As calmly as he could, Gabe explained to her what had gone down. Nick could tell by the expression on her face that she was aghast.

“Man, I wouldn’t have let that happen.”

Nick wished Whitney could be more circumspect. Gabe was already disappointed about the situation. “Hey, Nitwit, you—”

“I can handle her.” Gabe’s expression was amused. Actually, he didn’t seem like somebody whose dream had gotten put off for months. “I won’t shirk my responsibility at the training center. Seth has gotten very bad news and Marilyn needs to protect her child. I have to be there for them.”

“I get that. I didn’t mean to be insensitive. But anybody can run training.”

Now Gabe’s face darkened.

Nick said, “Hell, girl, think before you talk. That was an insult.”

“It was?” She reached out and squeezed Gabe’s hand. “I’m sorry. But I thought you hated being shipped off to the center.”

“I think I’ve given you the wrong impression. Training recruits is an interesting, rewarding job. I want to be back in the thick of things is all.”

Nick shook his head. “He coddles you. He never gave the wrong impression.”

Gabe’s phone buzzed. “I’ve got to answer that. It might be a problem at Rowley.” He clicked on. “Marino…oh, hi, Declan.” Their other brother who lived in Lakeville. “I’m with them right now at Whitney’s place. I’ll put them on speaker phone.”

When she heard her brother wanted them all to hear this, Whitney dropped her chopsticks and sat up straighter. “What’s wrong, Dec?”

“Stay calm, especially you. Mama’s fine but in the hospital.”

Whitney’s face drained of color.

Gabe took her hand and kept hold of it. “Give us the details.”

Declan used his doctor’s voice. “She got dizzy and fell in the kitchen. Banged her head but not enough to go to emergency. Then her vision blurred and she was disoriented. Pa called 911, then me, and I met them at the hospital. She had a TIA.”

“A small stroke,” Whitney got out. All agents were EMTs.

“Yes. The doctor says it might not be the first one she’s had, but there’s no brain damage. Her blood pressure is high, so he changed her medication.”

“When’s she going home?” Nick asked.

“She’ll stay at least until tomorrow. They have to do a couple of tests, a brain scan and read the results.” He chuckled. “You know how she rarely gets mad? She let loose some blue Gaelic and Italian curses about the overnight stay.”

“Nobody messes with Mama,” Nick quipped. “Can we talk to her?”

“I’m not in her room. I’ll tell her you want her to call you.”

“Is Pa okay?” Gabe wanted to know.

“Yeah. Worried, but he’s strong.”

“We’re worried about all of them.” Whitney said. “Should we come to Lakeville?”

“I think that would upset her more. And give her the wrong impression about her health. But if you want to, ask her when she calls.” He waited. “And I’ll call you with the results of the tests and if anything else happens.”

“Promise?” Whitney asked.

“Of course. Have a drink for me,” he said by way of ending the call.

When they disconnected, Gabe turned to Whitney again. “This is serious, but Mama’s strong and will make all the changes in lifestyle she needs to for this condition. You’re not going to lose her, too, agra.” He used the term her mother used to call her.

Whitney’s hand went to her stomach. “It’s hard for me when somebody gets sick. Or injured.”

“Why wouldn’t it be hard, honey?” Gabe put in. “You lost both your parents when you were five years old.”

“Yeah. Max says I’m brave to a fault except where my family is concerned.”

“I can understand that.” Nick grasped her other hand. “You may never get over it.”

“I manage most of the time.”

“We know.”

Visibly, Whitney shook off the mood. “All right. I’ll worry about her until we talk to her, but let’s change the subject. And again, Gabe, I apologize if I insulted you about the training center.”

“Hush. We’re family.” He smiled at Nick. “So, what do you think of Nicky’s news?”

“I think it’s terrific.”

Nick’s stomach leapt whenever he thought about this. “I’m going to be a dad. Twice over.”

Whitney sighed wistfully. “Twins run in both our families.”

His grin was a mile wide.

She added, “This is really a new life for you.”

“I couldn’t be happier.”

They talked of babies and more grandchildren for Deidre Marino, though she was already spoiling Ryan, Jamie and Declan’s girls.

“Maybe you can tell Mama and Pa when they call,” Gabe suggested. “The news would cheer them up.”

“Great idea. I don’t think Isabelle would mind.”

“Then do it, buddy. Make her day.”

* * *

Hours later, the nightmare came.

She was standing at a gravesite. The boys were all grown, but she was five years old. Her parents had left her. They weren’t coming back. Tears flowed. Nick held one hand, Gabe the other.

“It’s okay. We’ll take care of you.” Gabe’s voice was sad. “Come sit on my lap.”

“No.” Instead, she let go of them and walked to the big box.

Suddenly, the lid lifted.

And inside was Deidre Marino.

“Noooooooooooooo,” she yelled.

“Wake up.”

“Noooooooooooooo.”

“Whitney, babe, wake up.”

She shuddered on the bed. A tug on her shoulder, rousing her. The chest beneath her cheek was hard. She caught a whiff of…Max. Alert now, she realized where she was. She bolted up. Threw off the covers and rushed to the bathroom, where she vomited.

Max had followed her, then helped her back to bed and held her close as they nestled in. “You haven’t had one of those dreams in a long time. Or gotten sick.”

“I know. I’m not surprised, though.”

“Because of Deidre’s incident.”

“Uh-huh. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist.”

Turning so he could hold her more fully, he said, “I could get a couple of days off. You’re not working for two, either. We could drive up to see her.”

“You’re a nice guy, Max. But no. She’ll get upset if I come home, wonder if something’s more wrong with her. Or worse, worry about me.”

“Then, close your eyes and think good thoughts.”

“Hmm.” She closed her eyes. But good thoughts didn’t come. Instead the images of the coffin plagued her.

* * *

Bright and early Monday morning, Gabe stood before twenty-four hand-picked agents-to-be. They weren’t beginners. They’d been through the FLETC, and Gabe’s job was to hone their physical, intellectual and psychological skills with more rigorous training.

“Good morning.”

Before he continued, two trainees said, “Good Morning, Agent Marino.”

The rest of the group chimed in. It was important to peg leaders. No surprise that Kurt Kilmer and MJ Hogan spoke up first. He’d bet his new golf clubs that either of those two would be the one.

“At this Center we train for a day we hope will never come.”

Stirring among the group.

“But train for it we will, and by the time you leave here, your response to stressful events will become second nature. You’ll develop the ability to react like lightning. Muscle memory from repetition with help. The activities are designed to be intense and high stress. You will become expert multitaskers in high-speed maneuvers, protective methodology, thwarting an attack and precision marksmanship. There’s also book learning about trials, testimony, and other legal matters you might encounter.”

He paused for effect, then clicked into the Power Point presentation. A map of the grounds came up. “You’ve visited the facility before, and I’ve seen some of you around the last few days. We’re in an ideal location to conduct maneuvers and instruction, halfway between Baltimore and D.C., about forty minutes from the latter. It’s private and secure, 493 acres surrounded by trees, and is invisible to the road.” The second slide automatically came up. “On the campus, you’ll see the two firing ranges, the physical-fitness facilities, the indoor swimming tank, courtrooms, driving course, which unfortunately, new agents like a little too much.”

His levity broke the tension. That was also necessary in training.

“We also have a hotel where we’ll conduct AOPs, Attack on the Principal, where you’ll learn to shield protectees. Then there’s the helipad, configured with the front part of a 707 and a replica of Air Force One, to train for preflight, in-flight and postflight coverage. And we have a mock-up of the White House, where we conduct drills.”

He clicked into some fun slides. Everyone chuckled at the first one. “You’ll be trained for all social situations. Here I am, a handsome devil, in a tux, guarding the vice president at a state dinner.” That brought a tinge of regret for him. “Here’s Agent Higgins on the golf course. And Agent Seth Lincoln, jogging with the king of a small country.” He’d had slides made of the two of them before they told him they wouldn’t be participating in this training class. “Lest you worry, attire, as well as your uniforms here, and your lodgings, your meals, everything you require in the coming months will be paid by the government.”

He switched off the computer. “Now, enough lecture. I’d like you to get into groups of four and discuss what seems most interesting, most challenging and most important to you. List them first individually, then discuss them.”

Paper and pens had been provided on the desks. They started to move. Gabe knew from his five years here that he could lecture all he wanted, but if he didn’t get them actively involved with the material, it wouldn’t be learned. As he scanned the class, he noticed Langston sitting in the corner. When groups formed, the boy got up and crossed to three trainees. He sat down and looked sullen.

Huh. Didn’t seem like he was very fond of team building. But he’d come out to train last week and seemed more interested than he’d initially come off. Too bad he couldn’t show his enthusiasm more. Maybe Gabe could help with that.

I thought you hated the job…anybody can run the training center.

Whitney had been wrong about that. He was a good teacher, which gave him a lot of satisfaction.

* * *

Macy stood behind the bar and glanced at the clock. She’d hoped Gabe would come in tonight to talk about opening day of the new class at the training center. She cringed when she thought about her meltdown yesterday. She’d kept everything cool between them until he’d gotten his second chance at protective detail. That had caused more emotional reactions to surface.

And, of course, she couldn’t stop thinking about how he held her last night, close to his heart, and brushed his hand down her hair. She’d been overcome with longing.

What had been his reaction?

Before she could work that one out, the door to the restaurant opened. But it wasn’t Gabe who entered. Instead a tall man with blondish hair and snapping blue eyes stood in the entry. Her heart clutched. She hadn’t seen him since that rainy day in May five years ago at her husband’s gravesite.

Spike’s partner, Peter Camp, was no longer drawn and gray. He’d put on weight since working with Spike, and his dimples showed when he smiled at her. Ducking under the opening of the bar, she rushed to him.

He stepped forward and grasped on to her, hugging extra long. “Hello, doll.”

He’d always called her that, and Spike had teased Peter about his crush on her.

The brotherly hug felt good. “Peter. It’s been so long.”

“I know.”

“No matter, you’re back.” She took his hand and led him to the bar. Instead of going behind it, she sat down on a stool and clasped both of his hands in hers.

“So,” she said.

“Yeah, so.” Close up, she could see lines around his eyes and mouth that weren’t there before. His gaze was more somber. He’d aged.

“I heard you were in Dubai.”

“I asked for a foreign assignment.”

She nodded.

“I had to get away.”

“Did your guilt follow you?”

“Yeah, but I’m better, Macy. And sorry I deserted you.”

“We all dealt with Spike’s death in our own way. Simon and I survived and we’re doing well now.”

He scanned the restaurant. “This place is great. And you’re the owner!”

“Yeah. I bought it with the insurance money.”

“Do you like running a bar?”

“It’s a restaurant mostly. We’re open for one single-entrée meal from four to eight, then only drinks until ten. When I bought the place from Cyrus”—the older man she’d worked for—“I remodeled and changed the hours. Having a place like this has it pros and cons, but I do like being a small-business owner. And the boss. Simon seems happy with the arrangement, too.”

“How is Simon?”

“Up and down,” she reiterated. “He’s in a special school, thanks again to his father’s death benefits, and they’ve worked wonders with him.”

“I abandoned him, too.”

“You did what you had to do. We all did, after the tragedy.”

The last of the patrons got up from his stool and said goodbye to Macy. He wasn’t an agent, so he didn’t recognize Spike’s partner.

“Good night, Bud.”

And then they were alone. “It’s so good to see you. I’m about to close up. Why don’t you come back and have a drink with me?”

“Back?”

“I live behind the restaurant. It’s a surprisingly roomy place.”

He hesitated. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Macy.”

“Why?”

Subtly, he drew away from her. “Guilt wasn’t the only reason I left you alone.”

“No?”

He shook his head.

“What else?”

He took in a deep breath.

“You can tell me. I’ll understand.”

“I sincerely doubt that.”

* * *

Gabe rarely ran in the dark anymore. First off, he had time during the daylight hours to work out, second, he hated running anyway, and third, he figured the way things were going for him, he’d fall and break his neck.

But tonight, he wanted to work off disappointment about postponing his promotion to the PPD. He also wanted to go to Macy’s Place and seek comfort from the woman who always made him feel better. And now, there was more. Though he tried not to, he thought about what happened yesterday and last night. Shit, all that talk about sex had gotten him consciously thinking about her in that way. He knew his attraction had simmered for a long time. Mostly, he’d controlled it, but when he’d sat on the bed with her in his arms, he’d wanted to make love to her. Plain and simple. Something about him leaving seemed to have kicked up his feelings to another level.

She’d been pulling away, too, before yesterday, when she let her defenses down. He’d been shocked at her admission.

I wish you weren’t leaving.

And, for God’s sake, for those few minutes, he’d wished the same thing.

Arrgh! He couldn’t go down this road. It was dangerous. He wanted a job at the White House. He was out here in the windy evening because the delay was bothering him more than he’d expected it to. He should have been there now, working his dream job. It was hard to train others to do what you wanted to do. Though he never believed the old saw “Those who can, do, those who can’t, teach.” On his computer screen saver he had a better message. “Those who can, teach others how.”

Maybe because things were all jumbled up in his mind, he found himself heading toward Macy’s Place. About a thirty-five minute run from his home, the restaurant came in sight. Hell, he wished he had more willpower than this, but he couldn’t summon it tonight.

The closed sign was on, but he could see lights on in the back. Maybe coming from her residence. Or maybe she was sweeping up. He’d try the front, then go around to her apartment if the place was locked. But the door opened and he stepped inside.

He felt her presence as soon as he entered. Stopping, he listened and heard the mumble of voices. Someone else was still here? Maybe Simon come out to the bar. He walked toward the discussion.

And right before he came out of the shadows, he heard, “You can tell me. I’ll understand.” Her voice. Soft. Feminine.

“I sincerely doubt that.” A male. “But since that’s why I came back, I want to tell you that the reason I’ve stayed away is the same reason I left town.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m in love with you, Macy. I was when Spike and I were partners. I couldn’t stand myself then and squelched my feelings as best I could, but they’re back now. Even stronger.”

“Oh, Peter.”

What the fuck? Peter Camp was Spike’s partner. He’d left town shortly after the funeral and took an overseas position. Gabe had felt sorry for him.

Gabe should leave, he knew that. But what if Macy started a relationship with this guy? Spike had said several times what a good guy Camp was. Gabe was torn, then he heard, “I’m getting out of the Secret Service.”

No way was Gabe letting this go on now. He stepped forward.

“Am I interrupting something?” he asked as if he hadn’t overheard them.

Macy looked up at him. Her face, backdropped by the muted glow from the lamps, changed from a furrowed brow to an I’m-so-glad-to-see-you expression.

Peter turned, too. His annoyance changed to one of surprise and welcome. “Gabe, you son of a bitch.” Standing, he held out his hand, then changed his mind and hugged Gabe.

Now Gabe felt like a heel. “Peter, great to see you.” When the man stepped back, he added, “Back from Dubai, I see.”

“Yeah, I got in tonight.”

“That’s good.” It sucked, really. Especially because of what he’d heard when he’d eavesdropped.

Macy stood, too. “I made coffee. Want some?”

“No, thanks.”

She scanned him. “You never run at night.”

“Special circumstances. I’d take ice water.” He gestured to the chair. “Mind if I join you?”

“No, no, not at all.” The guy was a terrible liar.

“Don’t be silly. Of course we don’t mind.” She stepped close to Gabe and kissed his cheek. “I’m always glad to see you.”

Peter’s eyes narrowed on them.

Instinctively, Gabe reached out and squeezed her arm. “You sure?”

“Sit and I’ll get us drinks.”

* * *

Macy felt such relief when Gabe walked in the door—after Peter dropped his little bomb—that her knees went weak. She headed toward the coffeepot and small fridge in the restaurant proper, silently thanking him for showing up. She had to deal with the position Peter had put her in and she was glad for a buffer. Or, at least, she hoped that was her reason.

She poured ice water, set it on the tray with coffee and returned to the table. Macy gave Gabe a weak smile. He seemed in a good mood and it didn’t appear he’d overheard the declaration that Peter had made.

Spike and Gabe were talking. “So you’re still at the training center? I heard you got a PPD.”

“I did. The job’s been delayed because of issues at Rowley. What about you?”

“I’m done with the Secret Service. I bought into a private-security firm. I’ll be a consultant, without field work.”

At least he’d be safe.

“I hope that makes you happy.”

They sipped coffee and water, but awkwardness hung heavily in the room.

Finally, Macy couldn’t take it anymore. “Well, I need to get back to Simon.”

Gabe stood immediately. Spike remained seated. She turned to him. “Spike, I need to talk to Gabe about Simon. Let me walk you out.”

Shock on the guy’s face said he wasn’t expecting her to pick Gabe to stay. Was she being insensitive? Could be, but there was no way to reject him easily. When they got outside, she turned to him. “I don’t know what to say to you. I never suspected your feelings.”

“I hid them well. But now I want to pursue a relationship with you.” Secret Service agents didn’t mince words. She’d always liked that about them.

“How about if I call you tomorrow and set up a time to talk.”

“Um, yeah, I guess.” With confusion and not a little annoyance on his face, he drew out his phone. “I’ll text you so you have my number. Give me yours.”

She recited her contact information.

Reaching out, he grasped her arms, tenderly, like a lover. “I do want to talk to you.”

Macy eased back and crossed her arms over her chest in a distancing measure. “It’s late, and we’ll get together soon. I need some time to think about this.”

“I understand. I’ll wait to hear from you.”

When she walked back into the restaurant, she locked the door and crossed to Gabe. He’d stood up and was leaning against the bar, his hands jammed into his pockets.

Watching him watch her intensely, she felt like she was on a precipice. But she knew one thing. Peter Camp was not the man she wanted a relationship with. Maybe it was that knowledge that allowed her to make a decision.

“So, did you or did you not overhear our conversation?”

“I overheard.”

Her heart started to beat a clip. “And?”

His answer was to step forward.

“This is what I think.”

* * *

Gabe blanked his mind and lowered his head, pressed his lips to hers. She melted into him, grasped his neck and fitted her body to his. He deepened the kiss, angled it, slid his arms down and lifted her up for better access. She moaned and his head swam.

Macy was lost. His scent, the feel of his hard body against hers made her knees weak. She accepted his caress, his kiss with an eagerness that shocked her. When his tongue probed her lips, she opened to him like a flower blooming in the sun. He explored her, tasted her, told her with his mouth how he felt.

Gabe couldn’t say how long they steeped themselves in each other. He couldn’t say how they drew apart. But here was Macy, her hair down and out of the braid, mussed by his hands, her lips swollen from his mouth. He could still feel her imprint on him, one he wouldn’t forget. Ever. He raised his hand and brushed his knuckles down her cheek. “Well.”

Those sexier-than-ever lips parted. “Yeah, well.”

She held his gaze. Her eyes burned with passion. “What brought this on?”

“Like I said, I overheard your conversation with Peter.”

“And his declaration caused this?”

“Partly. But my heart’s been dancing around this for a long time.”

“Your heart’s been dancing? For me?”

“Yep.” He leaned over and kissed her nose. “Should I apologize?”

“Maybe only for taking so long.”

This time he brought her to him gently. Held her close to his chest. Rested his chin on her head. “There are reasons for us to stay away from each other.”

“I know. And I’ve tried to listen to them. But for a long time now, I wanted you in my life like this.”

“What about all the barriers? The ones we never voiced.”

“You know, after Spike died, I wished I hadn’t been so concerned about the future. Life tripped us up in the end anyway.”

“Hmm.”

“And that’s the opposite of how you feel about life.”

“Some, yes. But mostly, I didn’t pursue this with you to protect you and Simon.”

“I appreciate that.” She laid her hand on his heart. “So where do we go from here?”

“I don’t know.”

A small smile broached her lips. “Hmm. Me, either.”

He looked down at her and she looked up at him. They fell into another kiss.

Which was even hotter than the first.

* * *

“Let’s go outside. I want to lay in the hammock and talk.” Her voice was husky after the explosive contact. Sexy.

“All right.”

Once in the house, she checked on Simon, who was sleeping soundly, then grabbed the throw from the couch. They headed to the backyard. He situated himself into the hammock first, then eased her down beside him, his arm sliding around her neck. Grateful beyond words that she hadn’t booted him out for kissing her, he sighed.

“I love the stars. I painted them on Simon’s ceiling.”

“Yeah, he told me. Mace, Simon’s another concern.”

“I know. What if something happens to you, too? Spike’s death sent him into a spiral.”

“He doesn’t need that.”

“No.”

He drew her closer. Kissed the top of her head. “But I’m not sure I can control myself around you after our feelings are out in the open.” He angled his chin to the house. “After that little session in there.”

“Me, either.”

“Hell of a mess.”

A long, comfortable silence.

“Have you…have you felt this way for a long time, Gabe?”

“When you bought the bar and I got to know you, you were a grieving widow. And as you said, Simon was a wreck. I refused to let myself feel attraction.”

“When I started seeing you so much,” she confessed, “I did the same thing. It worked for a while.”

“Yeah. But for several months, maybe longer, I’ve wanted more.”

“Me, too.”

His arm brushed her skin, which was soft and silky. Briefly, he wondered if she was that way all over. “I can’t expect you to accept a life like you had with him, sweetheart. I can’t make you worry and wonder if I’m coming back to you. I wouldn’t ask you to do that.”

“I don’t want that, either, Gabe.” Again, the quiet. “But you’re right, we can’t go back to denying something we’ve already admitted.” She raised herself up a bit. “I want to be with you. See if we have something.”

“Are you sure, Macy?”

“Yes. We can be together while you’re here in Maryland. We’ve got almost five months.”

“Then what?”

“I don’t know.”

“What about Simon?”

“We won’t tell him yet.”

Though the idea wasn’t horrible, he was surprised she offered it. Maybe even a little excited. “We’d sneak around?”

“Let’s try to keep it from him until he goes to camp.”

“What about when he gets back?”

“You’re putting up roadblocks. If you don’t want to do this say so.”

He was shocked at her impatient tone. “You misunderstand.” She didn’t seem convinced, so he moved over her and pressed her back into the ropes, then gave her a long, sexy kiss. “You know I want to do this.”

“I guess, but a girl needs to hear things like that.”

A grin spread over his face. He was feeling cocky. “Then, understand this. I’ve thought about making love to you for months. About what you’d feel like under my hands.” He whispered in her ear, “About what it will feel like when I’m inside you.”

Again, the siren’s smile. “That’s a good start.”

“When does the boy leave for camp?”

“The middle of the month.”

“I suppose we can wait. We can use the time in-between to be together, get to know each other on a different level before we take the plunge.” He sighed. “It’ll probably kill me to postpone that stuff, now I know how you feel, but I think it’s the right thing to do.”

“It’ll kill me, too.”

“Good to know.”

Another kiss sealed the deal.