Matt Stallworth

My whole world was turned upside down. I stared at myself in the clubhouse bathroom mirror that spanned the length of the wall.

God, I look like shit.

I hadn’t eaten in two days and had maybe slept a total of eight hours the previous week. Somehow I’d managed to find the energy to at least shave and get dressed. I pulled my phone from my pocket and stared at the screen.

I’d called Kelsey four times and left two voicemails. I swiped through to my messages where I’d sent eight texts.

Nothing.

I wasn’t sure how I’d get through the press conference. This was the moment. The big one in every baseball player’s career where the hard work finally paid huge dividends. I didn’t care about the money or the prestige. I’d have traded every bit of it to talk to her for thirty seconds.

I loved baseball, but not the way I loved Kelsey Martin.

The door flew open and Ethan followed, holding a jersey and hat behind his back like I couldn’t see it. “Sorry, bro. They want you to try this stuff on for the photo op after you sign.”

“It’s fine. I get it.” I held out a hand to receive both items.

I laid the jersey out on the counter and held the hat in my hand. With one finger I traced the N and the Y on the front.

“Gonna be a Yankee. Play for the same empire as Ruth, Gherig, Mantle—pretty wild.” Ethan attempted to appease me.

“Umm, yeah”—I turned to look at him—“pretty surreal.”

Ethan clapped a hand on my back. He knew. I knew.

Baseball was the furthest thing from my mind at the moment.

“Has Jenny talked to her?” I stared at the pinstriped jersey on the counter.

“She’s trying, but I don’t have any new info. Sorry, buddy.”

“You read the newspaper this morning? See the forums on the team’s webpage?”

Ethan’s hand gripped the back of my neck, hard. “Fuck, man. I told you to stay away from that shit.”

I shook my head and smiled. “They umm, they called me Benedict Arnold. Some of them—” I laughed, but a pin-drop could have been heard through the room.

Ethan stood there, grinding his jaw. His hand started to shake against my neck.

“They hoped my house burned down, with my family inside it.” I belted out an obvious fake laugh.

“They’re trolls, man. It’s what they do. Fucking nerds with a keyboard in their mother’s basement somewhere.”

I turned on the water and splashed some on my face, but it was a charade. I dropped to my elbows on the sink and broke the fuck down. “I’ve given so much to this city. I’ve always tried to do the right thing.”

Ethan hoisted me up off the counter. How, I had no idea, but he turned me to face him. “Hey! Real baseball fans know that shit. One or two people always make all the noise. News reporters want fucking ratings. People here still love you and they will no matter what happens.”

I nodded. We both knew the biggest reason I was freaking out, but there was no need to mention her name. “I know, man. I don’t give a fuck. Just seems like the whole goddamn world is against me right now.” The not giving a fuck part was a lie and Ethan knew it. I’d damn near had a panic attack when I read what people thought of me. I’d expected some jeers, but not death wishes on my family.

“Things can turn around, Matty. They always do. That’s life, man. One minute you’re in the clouds, the next you’re eating a shit sandwich. It’s what makes it worth living.”

I smiled through the pain. “Always eloquent with the shit sandwiches.”

Ethan shrugged. “It’s what I do.”

I lifted the hat up to my head and took a huge breath. “Let’s see how it looks.”

I put it on and it was a good two sizes too big. I wiggled it back and forth. “Jesus.”

Ethan grinned in the mirror. “Maybe you’ll grow into it playing for those assholes.”

I shook my head at him and the bill flipped around. “Nice.” I pulled on the jersey and somehow it managed to swamp my upper body. “Jesus, did they send Sabathia’s shit over?”

We both laughed. I pulled the ridiculously large hat and jersey off and shoved them both in Ethan’s chest. “Why don’t you be a good little agent and go get some shit that fits so I don’t look like more of a clown than I already do.”

“Always got jokes. That’s okay. I’m the most expensive errand boy you’ve ever fucking met. So who’s the real fool?”

We both chuckled but it was awkward as hell.

“You gonna be okay out there?”

I nodded. “Yeah, man. I’ll be fine.”

He stared, unconvinced.

“I promise.”

He walked away slowly with the cap and jersey, but kept looking over his shoulder at me. “Okay.”

They called my name and I thought I might lose my lunch all over the stage when I walked up. I took in a deep breath and walked up the steps to a barrage of flashing lights and cameras.

In the middle of the stage sat a table with a microphone attached to it. Right behind the mic was a small stack of papers and a pen. I gave a quick wave and walked over to the seat, attempting to focus on anything other than the reality of what was taking place.

Fortunately, I wasn’t doing a Q&A, so I wouldn’t have to field any ridiculous questions about the fans or any of that other bullshit. Reporters were relentless, always trying to provoke an emotional response.

I sat down and leaned over to the mic. “Hello.”

My voice boomed through the room, and the bright flashes of the cameras pounded my eyes like a strobe light.

“I don’t think it’s any big secret why I’m here today, so let’s just get to it. I love this city.”

A few snickers and scoffs came from the sea of reporters. I stopped and glared in that direction for a brief moment, and then realized I just needed to get it all over with as soon as possible.

“I was born nearby. Played college ball right up the road. I’ve been with the Rangers organization for a long time now, and I can’t thank them enough, for everything. They’ve done so much more than just develop my baseball skills on the field.”

A door opened at the back of the room and caught my attention, even though everyone else was oblivious. I squinted and peered through the lights and made out Jenny’s face. My heart leaped for a second, wondering if she’d brought Kelsey with her.

I smiled.

Jenny didn’t smile back, though. She stared back at me, a blank expression on her face, but I wasn’t sure if she could see me or not.

Fuck, she’s not coming.

I couldn’t take my eyes off the back of the room. My heart wasn’t ready to let go of any hope that it still held. I started to lean to the mic once more, and a smile spread across Jenny’s face.

She stepped through the door and to the side, and there she was. Kelsey looked around the room at all the cameras and lights and her eyes grew wide.

A few reporters in front of me cleared their throats, as if to remind me to continue my speech. But I wasn’t capable of words. When Kelsey’s eyes met mine, there was no way I was turning away from her. She had on the Spinderellas T-shirt and Levi’s jeans she’d worn on our first date.

The blinding lights went off so fast they almost became constant, as mumbles started to circulate through the room.

A single tear rolled from the corner of her eye down her cheek.

“Mr. Stallworth?” One of the reporters in the front row attempted to get me to focus.

It wasn’t happening.

I stared at Kelsey and she at me. Eventually, a few reporters at the back turned around and started snapping pictures of Kelsey.

Fuck this, they are not going to scare her away!

I sprang from my chair and ran to the end of the stage. The place turned into bedlam. I jumped down from the stage and barreled through reporters, fighting my way through the flashing lenses and microphones shoved in my face.

“Kelsey!”

I couldn’t hear a thing over the sound of reporters hollering out my name and random questions.

Fuck!

I shoved through more of them, elbowing random people who were too close. I didn’t give a shit. Kelsey stood beyond them, hurting, and I was going to give her my full attention whether these assholes wanted me to or not.

“Kelsey!”

I led with my shoulder and pushed through faster.

“Matt!”

I saw a hand in the air, just beyond the crowd where she’d been standing before.

“Kelsey!” I plowed through and saw Ethan standing in front of her, blocking reporters from getting to her.

She covered her mouth and tears streamed down from her eyes.

I took off toward her.

“I will beat some ass if you assholes try and get close to her.” Ethan grinned and let me through.

I flew up to her and wiped the tears from her eyes with each of my thumbs. My palms went flat on the sides of her face and everything, all the camera crews, reporters, office personnel—they all blurred and faded.

I pressed my forehead against hers. “I’m sorry.”

Kelsey nodded, quickly. “Yeah, me, too.” She sniffled and glanced around. “Wow, you really are kind of a big deal, aren’t you?”

I shook my head. “No. I’m just a regular guy—who’s deeply, madly in love with the woman in front of him.” I tucked some of her hair back behind her ear like I had always done before.

“I love you, too.” She paused for a second. “Stallworth.”

My entire body flooded with adrenaline, to the point I thought I might float off the ground. I kissed her with everything I possibly had, not giving a shit who was in the room with us. Time stood still when my lips pressed against hers and all the pieces of shattered glass that were my life reverted back to their original state like a video clip played in reverse.

The kiss ended, and our eyes opened at the exact same time.

Another tear formed in the corner of her eye and I brushed it away with my thumb.

Every time Kelsey tried to smile she’d start crying again. I kissed her on the forehead and ran a hand through her hair. “Don’t cry.”

“I’m not crying. You’re crying, you pussy.”

I gasped. “Am not.”

We both laughed. I could’ve had tears running down my face, I had no idea at that moment. I glanced over to Ethan and Jenny. Jenny wiped tears from her eyes and Ethan smiled while holding his arms out in front of the reporters.

“Look, we even made the asshole smile.”

Kelsey turned to see who it was and laughed.

Ethan flipped us the bird.

Kelsey’s arms wrapped around my neck. “I’ve never been to New York before. Is it nice?”

I nodded. “It’s an amazing city.”

“Should I start looking at apartments and record stores?”

All of the breath left my lungs. I couldn’t believe this woman. And as usual I spoke before thinking things through. “What? Why?”

Her arms loosened around my neck. “Oh, sorry. That was presumptuous of me. I shouldn’t—”

I held a finger up to her lips to silence her. “No, no, I didn’t mean it like that.”

Her face came back to life.

“What I meant was, I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying here.”

The reporters lost their shit when they heard that and went crazy trying to shout questions at me. I waved them away like I was swatting an irritating bug, not even bothering to look.

“Wait, you are?”

I grinned. “Yes. I’m not going anywhere.”

Kelsey squealed and leaped onto me. I caught her midair with a kiss and she hooked her legs around my waist.

She leaned over into my ear and whispered, “Can I be your little whore tonight? I’ve been good for way too long.”

She leaned back and laughed while waggling her eyebrows up and down. I shook my head and grinned. “Anything for you, babe. But you may have to deal with all these reporters first.”

Kelsey’s head craned around the room. “What? Why would I need to deal with them?”

“You kinda just got me to stay here and play for their team.”

She held her head up jokingly, as if she was proud of herself. “I did, didn’t I?”

“Cocky already. They’ll love you.”

Jenny walked up and handed us both blue Texas Rangers hats. Her face was pink and she beamed at us.

Kelsey took them from her and put one on my head, and the other on top of her head. The whole room broke out in raucous cheers.

I looked up and Kelsey’s hat was even bigger on her than the Yankee hat Ethan had brought me earlier. We both laughed and I reached up and slapped the bill down over her face.

When she lifted it back up I pulled her in close and kissed the shit out of her again. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”