CHAPTER THIRTEEN
JACK LOOKED at her face. No, he couldn’t deny her. Especially when he needed her so badly. He hadn’t realized how much until he’d looked into her compassionate, blue eyes.
He glanced down. Her breasts rose and fell beneath the nearly sheer lingerie and having tasted the sweetness beneath, Jack desired more.
And obviously so did she. He pulled hard on the thin strap on her shoulder and it tore from its binding. He did the same to the other strap and eased the teddy off her, as she lifted her back and hips, all too eager to shed the constricting undergarments.
What he saw was beyond his wildest imaginings. If he’d walked into this room at the boiling point, looking at her naked body shattered what remained of both his reserve and his restraint. “You’re incredible.”
She averted her gaze. “Can we stick to the truth?”
“Absolutely.” She obviously still didn’t believe in her beauty or worth and given what he’d learned of her history he understood.
But when she was with him, dammit, she shouldn’t have to doubt. He drew back and stood, stripping quickly, divesting himself of his clothes until he could join her again on the bed. Heat arced between them, hot and powerful.
Her eyes bore into him, watching his erection. “You see what you do to me.” She was seeing him naked, yes, but she also saw inside him, deeper than any woman had before.
A wry, yet adorable smile twisted her lips. “It’s a known fact men don’t always think with their…well you know, when they’re looking to get lucky.”
He laughed at her forthright response. That was his Mallory, the honest woman who didn’t hold back what she was thinking. “I wouldn’t call it getting lucky if it was just an easy lay with someone I didn’t give a damn about.”
Her lashes fluttered, showing her uncertainty. “Well it’s also a known fact men will say many things in the heat of the moment and mean very few of them.”
“We’re not in the heat of the moment.” He eased forward until he could push her legs apart and kneel between. “Yet.” He kept his gaze on hers but bent lower, his lips inches from paradise.
She let out a slow exhale of air. “You talk a good game.” And her husky voice told him how much she liked his talk—as well as his obvious intent.
“It’s no game. If all I wanted was any woman, I wouldn’t be here now.” Because she was too damn complicated, too compelling, too everything as far as he was concerned.
If he lost himself inside her to forget the pain of the day, he risked losing himself to her forever. But he was here and too far gone. He wasn’t running away.
“And sweetheart, if all I wanted was any woman, I’d be inside you by now, taking care of my needs instead of doing this.” He dipped his head and licked her, tasting her femininity, feeling her heat and fueling the dewy dampness.
“Believe me now?” he asked.
A shuddering moan was her only response. Her hands gripped the bedding by his sides and her hips jerked upward. From her liquid heat Jack knew she was close to the edge and he couldn’t wait any longer. Good thing he didn’t have to worry about readying her for the next step.
She caught him off guard, toppling him over onto his back, straddling his waist. He barely saw her reach for the drawer or rip open the foil packet, but he most definitely felt her ease the moist plastic sheath over his penis, and pause for deliberate handling that went above and beyond merely donning protection.
The desire to drive himself inside her was strong. The need to watch her as she lowered herself onto him and accommodated his width and length even stronger. But he couldn’t stop himself from touching her, from taking his fingertips and parting her feminine flesh and from placing himself at her opening.
He grabbed for her hips at the same moment she released her restraint. He slid inside her heated core, feeling her slick and moist passage close around him.
“God.” The word erupted from him in a guttural groan. Her body’s initial resistance was his tight consummate pleasure. He’d never felt anything so hot, so right, so perfect, he thought, and their fit brought a choking sensation to his throat.
And because he’d promised himself he’d watch, he forced his heavy eyelids open and pushing himself up on his elbows, he glanced down. Big mistake, he thought as he viewed himself cushioned inside her body. If he thought he’d be a goner before, he knew he was lost now.
Or was he actually found? Shaking off the intense thoughts in favor of intense pleasure he began a steady thrusting motion that intensified every sensation rocketing through his body.
Mallory nearly screamed from the incredible heat and dizzying friction they were creating. She was wet silk surrounding hardened flesh. Though she thought she’d steeled herself against an overload of emotion, she’d been wrong.
What she felt for this man was so powerful and strong, it would remain with her long after they were no more, something she didn’t want to think about yet. She clenched her muscles tighter around his hard, straining erection, knowing her climax was in sight.
Her grinding met with his thrusting resistance and the tantalizing waves grew stronger. Jack grabbed onto her hips and she opened her eyes to meet his clouded but steady gaze. “Let yourself go, sweetheart.” He lifted his hips, bringing her so close. And he waited.
She tried to breathe and a needy cry came out instead. “Then you take me there—and come with me.” She swiveled her bottom in a slow circular motion. Her pelvis gyrated into his hips and he penetrated so deep the word joining took on a whole new meaning.
“Aah, God. Now.” He thrust and she tightened her muscles around him.
Swirling waves of unending pleasure swamped her. She looked into his incredible face and meeting her gaze, he pumped harder. She couldn’t think, let alone breathe. Their bodies moved together in unison, his thrusting movements coming faster and faster until her grinding resistance became the focal point of erotic pleasure.
“Yes, yes…” She let out a cry of pleasure in a voice she didn’t recognize as her own.
“Yes.” He echoed her words as he came, bursting inside her as he shook with the power of his orgasm.
And the world as she knew it fragmented into millions of pieces of light, blindsiding her—not by the release itself, but because this time they came together—and the beauty brought tears to her eyes.
Her breathing came in shallow gasps as she dropped her body weight onto his. “I love you.” The words escaped before she could stop them and considering what had come before, she couldn’t call them back even if she wanted to.
She didn’t. And that scared her most of all.
* * *
MALLORY LAY on top of him, breathless, sated…and expecting an answer, if Jack’s hunch was right. But he had nothing to say. Nothing she’d want to hear, anyway.
Before Mallory, Jack had always had sex. He’d had a damn good hunch as he walked into this room, that this was much more. He’d been right. She wasn’t the only one falling.
Years of preconceived notions and divorce statistics told him they didn’t stand a chance, yet for the first time he considered the other statistics. The marriages that survived. The people who stayed together for reasons that transcended convenience and security. He was willing to look the idea of a soul mate in the eye and not run for protection.
He didn’t miss the irony. The one time in his life he was willing to face the future, he didn’t have one.
Mallory exhaled and he felt the whoosh of air against his cheek. “I won’t lie and say I said it in the heat of the moment, but don’t worry, I don’t expect you to say I love you back.”
“I do care.” More than was prudent. “And I wish I could say the words.” But he couldn’t acknowledge he might feel the same because to do so would jeopardize everything she wanted out of life.
Jack was the least selfless person he knew, yet protecting Mallory and the things she held dear had become his priority. Her career most of all.
“Hey, wishing doesn’t make things happen, and we both knew the rules going in.”
Jack didn’t buy her lighthearted tone. “Rules change.”
“But outlooks don’t. And we both know yours.”
He forced a laugh he didn’t feel. “Yes, it parallels yours. Career first. Everything else second.”
“Right.”
Yet suddenly faced with the thought of returning to his empty New York City apartment didn’t feel as invigorating or liberating as it once had.
But he’d already made partner, already achieved his dream. Whatever her reasons for wanting to make partner, and regardless of whether it would alter her relationship with her parents, that was her goal. One she’d worked and strived for. One she’d suppressed her sense of self to achieve.
I love you.
He couldn’t admit he felt the same. Couldn’t confront his own demons and decide whether to take the risk and trust Mallory with his heart. He had no choice but to push the truth away.
For her sake.
From violating the no-office-romance policy to playing around on the job, the old guard at the firm would view Mallory’s actions with disdain. They wouldn’t fire Mallory—they couldn’t without risk of a lawsuit—but they could stall her partnership and make her miserable until she left on her own. They wouldn’t mourn the loss of their only female associate. Meanwhile Jack would get a reprimand, a slap on the hand and maybe even a ribald joke about controlling his baser urges. But he’d have his partnership and his career intact. Unfair, but true.
“Jack?”
He rolled to the side, taking her with him. Her flesh pressed against his, warming him. He glanced into her worried face and admitted to himself he cared about her too damn much. “I’m here.”
But he didn’t love her, Mallory thought. Her heart twisted with regret. Even if fate dictated they had no future, she wished he felt the same. But she figured he was too used to the line to take her seriously anyway. No matter how much her pounding heart already belonged to him.
“What happened at home?” she asked, changing the subject.
He visibly winced. “My parents are getting divorced, finally.”
“So your father stood up for himself. You must be pleased.”
“Pleased doesn’t begin to describe it. My mother went home to pack her things—boyfriend by her side.”
Mallory cringed. “That’s insensitive.”
His expression turned shuttered and blank. “That’s my mother.”
And that’s where Jack’s views on long-term relationships and women came from, Mallory realized.
“Onward and upward. She constantly wants more and better and doesn’t care who gets hurt on her way.”
“Why did she stay with him so long then?” she asked of Jack’s father.
“Financial security. And he allowed it.”
“We’re not all like her.” Mallory wasn’t sure where the words came from, only that they were necessary.
“I know you aren’t.” A muscle ticked in his clenched jaw. “But forgive me for not having tested the theory. The divorces and statistics I’ve seen were enough to convince me to steer clear.”
She shut her mouth and nodded. Perhaps he believed she was different, perhaps not. In the end it didn’t matter because he’d bought into a stereotype too difficult for any woman to overcome. Especially Mallory, who’d made her climb up the ladder, her onward and upward, a public one in a male-dominated world.
She placed a hand over his lips. He’d already confided enough to convince her he trusted her with his personal, emotional baggage. She wouldn’t make him dredge up more. “I can think of more fun things to do than get all emotional.”
His dark eyes met hers, and in those depths she saw a wealth of emotion and feeling—and she refused to believe she’d conjured it up in her mind. That he’d fallen for her a little bit was enough considering they each had their own paths to follow, neither allowing for a long-term relationship.
“What’d you have in mind?” he asked.
She forced an easy smile. “I heard from our P.I. and I have a wealth of information about Mrs. Lederman.” But lying naked with Jack, for what might be the last time, she had no wish to discuss work. Especially a topic which pained her more each time she thought about it.
His big hand cupped her hip. “You didn’t have work in mind.”
She shook her head. “And it’s not like there’s anything we can do with the information at midnight.”
“You’re right. Whatever it is can wait.” He covered her mouth with his and drew her into a deep kiss. And when he bit down on her lower lip, she moaned.
She desired more but knew she had other things in store for Jack and forced herself to pull back. She grabbed for the scarf he’d brought with him that lay beside her on the bed, then she rose to a sitting position, settling herself above his stomach.
She wrapped the scarf around her hands and pulled at the opposite ends, teasingly. Enticingly.
His eyes darkened with anticipation. “Exactly what do you plan on doing with that thing?”
“I thought I’d have my wicked way with you again. You see, I’ve heard that if you blindfold a man, his other senses become that much more acute.”
“Interesting theory,” he said.
She grinned. “I thought so. Do you think the same holds true for women?”
“I certainly intend to find out.” He pushed his upper body forward so he could raise himself off the mattress and nip at one nipple, causing waves of pleasure to crest and recede inside her. She bent her head back and let out a muffled cry.
While she was distracted, he grabbed the scarf from her hands. “Cheater.” She barely got the words out when he pulled the fabric taut to rub it in a horizontal motion across her breasts. Her hips began an involuntary circular dance on his stomach.
“I don’t see you complaining,” he said with a grin.
Light and fun. He’d relaxed once more. At least she hadn’t scared him away with her declaration of love. She supposed not asking for anything in return helped him push her declaration out of his mind, and if she were smart, she’d do the same herself.
He wound his hands around the silk, his heavy-lidded gaze never leaving hers. “Let’s test those heightened senses of yours.”
She sucked in a nervous breath. She’d planned on pleasuring him this way, not having the tables turned. Her nipples had already hardened into tight peaks and the dewy moisture between her legs attested to her growing excitement. As he secured the scarf around her eyes, everything around her went black.
Anticipation coiled into a knot in her stomach. The nerve endings in her fingertips began to tingle and as suggested, her other senses grew stronger.
She inhaled. The scent of his cologne, potent and alluring, teased her already tenuous restraint while goose bumps arose on her arms thanks to the air-conditioning in the room—and the inherent foreplay in his actions.
A cool rush of air blew over her nipples. She arched her back at the sensual assault and would have fallen over if not for Jack’s strong arm around her waist.
“I’ve got you.” He eased her backward onto the fluffy mound of pillows behind her.
Curiosity hammered a rapid beat in her veins. She was vulnerable to him and his intentions, yet she’d never trusted a man more. “Jack?”
“Right here.” He brushed a soft kiss over her lips, then adjusted her blindfold, making certain she couldn’t see but allowing for comfort. Seconds later, soft music floated around the room. “Are you okay?” he asked.
“Never better.” She heard the warmth infused into her voice, and knew it was a reflection of how he made her feel.
“Good. Now let’s test that theory of yours. There are five senses, yes?”
She nodded.
Jack intended to test every one. He couldn’t give her more than now, but when now was over, she’d have not only her love but a host of memories to hold on to and he’d have the same.
So why didn’t it seem enough?
He shivered, knowing what he really wanted was to lose himself inside her once more and this time, he’d be the one to let go of his tightly reined emotions. Restrained by reality, he had no choice but to give back the only other way he could—in return for the love she’d offered him and he’d had to turn away.
“So which of those five senses do you want to start with first?” he asked.
Her lips turned upward in a grin. “I think that would have to be touch.”
He nearly broke into a sweat just thinking about all the ways he wanted to explore her body and let her feel him.
He grit his teeth. Not yet. “Sorry but we’re saving the best for last. Let’s go with taste. Sit tight.”
“Like I’m going anywhere?” she asked wryly.
He headed for the minibar beneath the television. Thank goodness for amenities because in the refrigerator, he found a bar of chocolate. After unwrapping the candy, he took a bite of the milk chocolate and caramel and chewed. And chewed. And chewed.
“Hey what’s going on there?” she asked into the silence.
He laughed, realizing how long it was taking him to break down and finish the luscious treat. “Not a thing. You ready?”
“I’ve been ready.” She followed the statement with a long groan that he swallowed with his mouth as he covered her lips with his.
Mallory caught on quick. Her tongue invaded his mouth and began a long and leisurely exploration. She lapped at his tongue and nibbled on his bottom lip before coming up for air. “Mmm. Delicious.”
The husky sound shook him to his core and if he’d been sated minutes before, he was aroused again now.
“Chocolate.”
“Very good. Ready for the next one?”
She licked her moist lips. The erotic gesture sent shooting darts of desire straight to his groin.
Somehow he managed to suck in a breath and hold off tossing her onto the mattress. They had an experiment to complete first.
“Sense of smell, okay?” He turned her to face him, placing her hands on his shoulders.
After his shower and before leaving for the city, he’d splashed aftershave on and headed out the door. If his scent worked on her the way her exotic, unique scent worked on him, he’d have to pull her off him after this test.
He grabbed her hips and said, “Scoot forward and wrap your legs around my waist.”
A few misses and some jockeying of positions later, she’d done as he requested. Her thighs bracketed his waist and her damp, feminine heat pressed warm and enticingly against his groin.
“What are you doing to me?” Her words came out more of a whimper than a question.
Jack understood. His body was strung tight and begged for completion. But just being cocooned against Mallory and knowing it would have to last him a lifetime enabled him to savor the experience. And wait.
He kissed her lips. “Arousing you, sweetheart. Just like you’d intended to do to me with this scarf of yours.”
She scrunched up her nose. “I’ll have to pay you back, you know.”
He laughed hard. “I’m shaking. Now rest your head right here.” He guided her chin onto his shoulder.
She nuzzled her soft cheek against his roughened one and they sat in silence as her heart beat fast and strong against his chest. Her breasts softened against him and the head of his penis nudged against her opening, unprotected and insistent.
He prayed for restraint.
“You’re breathing fast,” she noted, a playful teasing tone in her voice. “Hard and shallow. Does that count for my heightened sense of hearing?”
If it brought him closer to the end of this experiment, hell yes, Jack thought. “It’s fine.”
She snuggled cheek to cheek for a moment before burying her face between his neck and shoulder. Her skin was soft, her breathing as shallow as his. She lifted her arms around his waist, hugging him close. That fast the gesture became more intimate than experimental. More an honest expression of emotion than a light and easy game.
Jack clung to the remaining strength he had left. Until she began to nuzzle his neck with her nose.
“Musky,” she murmured. “Masculine.” The words vibrated near his ear. “And so sexy.” She nipped the skin on his neck with her teeth then soothed with her tongue.
He’d ached. Now his body shook and restraint became a memory. The experimenting was over. It’d been harder on him than on her anyway. He’d survived taste, smell and hearing. Now he wanted touch.
Drawing her down to the bed he pulled the scarf off her eyes. She blinked as she adjusted to the light.
He looked into her face. “I want touch.”
Her lips parted. “Me, too. God, me, too.” Her permission was all he needed. He nudged her legs wide and drove himself into her.
He drove himself home.
* * *
MALLORY PULLED herself to a sitting position and watched Jack sleep. His tanned chest rose and fell and the warmth emanating from him drew her toward him all over again. She lay back and curled into him. His arms immediately reached out and cradled her in comfort and security. Desire hovered beneath the surface, a secondary emotion to her love for this man.
With this relationship she’d violated Mallory Sinclair, Esq.’s ethics and aspirations yet she couldn’t regret discovering Mallory Sinclair, the woman, and revealing her buried emotions. And though Jack said he couldn’t return her feelings and wouldn’t want a relationship that extended beyond this trip, Mallory would walk away from this experience forever changed.
For the first time in her life, she realized her feelings and needs came before her desire to please her father, a man who’d never shown any interest in her life or career. So why had she planned her entire future around attempting to gain his respect and love?
No answer came. But with dawn breaking outside her window, she realized the career path she’d chosen for the wrong reasons conflicted with acting upon the private investigator’s revelations regarding Mrs. Lederman.
And it was past time she dealt with certain facts and faced up to her feelings.
“Are you up?” Jack’s morning-roughened voice sounded in her ear.
“Mmm. I’ve been thinking.”
“About last night, I hope.” His hand reached around to cup her breast.
The pleasing tingling started immediately but her mind was worked up and she needed to talk first. “Last night was amazing. But we need to talk work before we get sidetracked again.”
He laughed. “You want me to talk work while I’m in bed with you and more awake with each passing minute?” He inched closer, until his groin, hard and erect, nestled against her back.
She let out a sigh. “Hard as it is…”
When he chuckled, she caught his double meaning and laughed. “No, hard as it is for me to say no to you now, I need to get this information off my chest.”
“What is it?” he asked, sounding concerned.
“Alicia Lederman has a history of abusing prescription drugs.”
“Bingo!”
Mallory cringed at the excitement she heard in his voice.
“This is exactly what we need to force her into a settlement. Once we tell Lederman about this…Wait a damn minute.” Behind her, Jack pulled himself to a sitting position.
Not wanting to feel exposed, she yanked the covers over her chest and sat up, too. “What’s wrong?”
“Was this abuse while they were married?”
Mallory nodded. “So was her stay in an expensive rehab clinic.”
“Then why didn’t Lederman share this piece of information?”
“Well, we’re not his attorneys of record,” she reminded him.
“I can buy that. But there’s another possibility—”
“He was testing us,” Mallory said, finishing his thought and sharing her own conclusions at the same time. “He wanted to see if we’d uncover the information on our own and how far we were willing to go with it.” And Mallory wasn’t willing to go the distance on this one.
She wasn’t sure when she’d made the decision, but it was somewhere between getting to know and like Alicia Lederman and falling in love with Jack. A soft side she hadn’t realized existed had crept up on her and settled in.
Mallory couldn’t use the woman’s past against her. Even if it cost her her job and the partnership she’d thought she’d coveted. She admired and respected Alicia Lederman too much. Her sense of fairness dictated she take the woman’s feelings into account.
Without warning, Jack tossed off the covers and climbed out of bed.
“Where are you going?”
“To talk to that son of a bitch. It’s one thing to be undecided about counsel and to invite us out here to get to know us better, but it’s another to play the games he’s been playing, disappearing, withholding information. I’m through. Either my record speaks for itself or it doesn’t.” He grabbed for his jeans.
“Jack, wait.”
He paused. “You’re right. I’ll shower first and then I’ll tackle Paul Lederman.” He charged toward the bathroom, magnificent in his nudity and masculinity.
She licked at her dry lips. “What’s the plan, Jack?”
He paused and turned. “Before or after I strangle him?” he asked wryly.
“After.”
“He hires us and we use the information and agree to as small a settlement as possible, why?”
“Because I vote we don’t use it.”
Jack stalked back into the room, his attorney instincts kicking into gear. “Mind telling me why not?”
She shook her head. “Because she doesn’t deserve it. You heard her. She raised his kids and from what I’ve seen she’s a major player in running this place. She’s earned a fair share. Besides, if she had a drug problem, she’s obviously over it now. Why threaten to make her weakness public? Why set her kids up for ridicule just to achieve Mr. Lederman’s needs?”
“Because if he comes around like I expect him to, he’ll be our client.” A client Jack didn’t like and didn’t trust, but a client entitled to loyalty and the best representation for his money just the same.
He stood at the foot of the bed, recalling their first day at the resort, Mallory’s determination and no-holds-barred attitude toward getting to know Mrs. Lederman and aiding their client.
“You suggested hiring the private investigator in the first place. Now you want to bury the information you asked him to find?” Jack shook his head in disbelief. “Aside from the fact that I doubt Lederman will want that, it’s contrary to our legal ethics and what we owe the client.”
She narrowed her gaze, obviously furious that he’d questioned her ethics. “I just happen to think there are less slimy tactics available.” But she glanced away just as quickly, a sure sign more was going on inside that beautiful head than she was willing to let on.
“This from the woman who wants to make it in a man’s world?” He could have bitten his tongue in two the minute the words escaped his mouth. But she’d shocked him with her about-face.
His arguments for using the information were valid. And besides, if he wanted things between them to return to a normal professional level, he couldn’t tread lightly around her feelings just because they’d once been involved.
Were still involved. Dammit. He didn’t like this one bit.
She rose from the bed, wrapping the sheet around her in what seemed more like an emotionally protective gesture than a physical one. “Well I guess we know where we both stand on this issue. And whose opinion carries the most weight.”
He hated hurting her. He hated the distance he’d just put between them even more. “Mallory…”
She shook her head. “Go shower and talk to Lederman.”
Knowing there was nothing more to say, Jack pulled on his pants and retreated to his own room for a shower. By the time he’d cooled down and knocked on her door, no one answered.
Whether she’d headed downstairs for a walk on the beach or if she was just ignoring him, the result was the same.
He was alone.