Chapter 11
The morning of the wedding, sweat poured off Grey’s body as he pushed himself harder on his run along the beach, the sun beating down on his bare upper body, his sport shorts clinging to his thighs. Water splashed up, his shoes were soaking wet, but none of that mattered on his run. The hot air, the bright, sunny day—he decided he needed to vacation more often. Christ, maybe it was time to purchase a vacation home in the tropics. He’d been missing out, and it was Evie that reminded him how he hadn’t been living, not truly, not like he did in his twenties. He’d been working, pushing hard to make his company successful. Perhaps it was time for a new chapter in his life.
When he reached the bar at the resort, he slowed to a stop, bent over, and breathed deeply, recovering from the run. The world was quiet around him. Being eight in the morning, most vacationers were either having breakfast or likely still fast asleep. Grey lifted his arms, stretching his shoulders, his legs tight and sore as he strode back to his room in the first block of buildings on the left. The wedding wasn’t until this afternoon, but Grey wanted to be there for Evie when she returned to the room before leaving to do all the girly things she needed to do today.
Once he reached his door, he heard voices coming from inside. Loud voices. Using his keycard, he opened the door and entered the room. It took him a good few seconds to take in the view in front of him.
Holly sat on the couch nearest him, tears raining down her cheeks, her black makeup streaking her face. Seth stood by the balcony door, hands stuffed into his pockets, his head hanging, his shoulders hunched. Grey glanced left then, finding Evie, and his focus narrowed entirely on her. She stood near the bed, wearing only a house coat, her wet hair still dripping, telling Grey she’d just stepped out of the shower. Though it was her pale skin and wide eyes that concerned him the most.
“Are you all right?” he asked, moving to her immediately.
“I don’t know what I am,” she said slowly, obviously in a state of shock.
Grey looked from Seth to Holly then back to Evie. Immediately, he understood what was happening here. But he wouldn’t voice that thought in case he was wrong. Instead, he asked no one in particular, “What’s going on here?”
“What’s going on here…” Holly said, sobbing, “…is that Seth is still in love with Evie.”
“Oh, God,” Evie whispered, dropping her head into her hands. “Please stop saying that.” She drew in a long, deep breath then lifted her head, eyes on Seth. “You don’t love me. You love the old me, and that’s okay. But I’m not that young girl anymore. You love Holly. You two are meant to be together. This is simply cold feet. That’s all.” Her worried gaze came to Grey’s, obviously seeking help.
Grey sighed and looked at Seth. “You do realize you are getting married this afternoon.”
Hands still in his pockets, he half shrugged. “I had to be honest.”
“Honest!” Holly yelled, jumping to her feet, her fists clenched at her sides. “Now you need to be honest, on our wedding day? Why weren’t you honest before? You could have told me all this. Why are you doing this to me?”
Seth glanced at his feet again. “I know, I know. I’m sorry, Holly.”
“Sorry?” she screamed, her face bright red. “You are not fucking sorry. If you were, you never would have done this.”
Grey glanced at Evie again, and he took her hand, feeling her tremble. She looked at him then, telling him all he needed to know. She’d been completely blindsided by Seth’s admission and had no idea how to handle it. Luckily for her, Grey did. “I’m not sure why you need to discuss this in here,” he said sternly, glancing at Holly. “This is between you and Seth. I suggest you take this conversation somewhere more private.”
Holly appeared to not even hear Grey and glared daggers at Seth. “I can’t believe you’re doing this to me. Evie doesn’t love you anymore. She doesn’t want you. She loves Grey. Can’t you see it? It’s written all over her face.”
Evie dropped her gaze, cheeks flushed.
Grey stroked her hand, letting her know he was there. With her.
“Oh, my God,” Holly cried, covering her face with her hands. “My parents, my family…everyone is here, Seth. What will we tell them?”
Seth all but whispered, “We’ll get it figured out.”
“We’ll get it figured out,” Holly repeated, slowly lowering her hands, scowling. “I want nothing to do with you.” She turned to Evie. “You have to help me, Evie.”
Evie suddenly stiffened, and Grey noticed the way her eyes and mouth tightened. Holly had hit a nerve. A big nerve.
Evie drew in a long, deep breath, and when she spoke, her voice was firm but also hinted at sadness. “I never wanted any of this. Don’t you both know that?” All eyes came to her, and she glanced from Seth to Holly. “I didn’t want you to fall in love and yet, you did, so I made myself accept it.”
Grey wrapped his other hand around hers, holding one of hers in both of his, feeling her shaking now as she continued. “I didn’t want you to get married, but then you got engaged, and yes, it hurt me at first…” She paused. Then added. “No, hurt isn’t strong enough. You broke me.”
“Evie,” Holly whispered, all the anger in her voice gone, tears in her eyes for another reason altogether.
Evie held up her hands. “Please. Let me finish.” She shut her eyes, breathed deeply, and then faced them again. “I accepted your relationship because I care for you. Both of you. And I built a life of my own that I’m proud of. I truly wanted you to be happy.”
The pain in Evie’s expression tightened Grey’s chest, strangling the air right out of him. She hid nothing of what they made her feel, and he saw the ripple of that across Seth’s and Holly’s faces. Both were crying now, lost in their blame, in their shame.
Evie never wavered, baring her soul in a way that made Grey only able to see her.
“I accepted you two being together because I thought you found true love in each other’s arms.” Her voice blistered. Something changed in Grey then, he felt it course through him, a subtle change that he couldn’t stop, making him soften to Evie, when she added, “Real love. Love that can’t be stopped because it’s that powerful. Love that would make you hurt your best friend and your ex-girlfriend, not because you wanted to, but because it was something that you couldn’t deny.”
Grey stepped closer, unable to stop himself, as her expression became so haunted. He slid his hand across her back, and he didn’t like that he got no response. He thought maybe she’d cringe, tell him that it was too much, or maybe she’d lean into him for support. But the coldness concerned him.
There was nothing but her pain when she continued. “I believed you two being together was fate. That you were meant to be with each other all this time, and how could I stand in the way of that? I wanted, after all this, for something good to come out of so much pain. I came here to support you.” A tear spilled from her eye, and she brushed it away quickly when she added, “Last night, I truly let it all go and felt genuinely happy that you two had found each other. I got closure. I moved on.” She drew in a long, deep breath, narrowing accusing eyes on Seth. “But now you tell me it wasn’t real. That your feelings for Holly aren’t real? Look at her. She’s standing here with her heart broken and for what? Because one woman isn’t enough. You have to have all the toys for yourself?”
She stepped away from Grey, approached them both and said, “There’s so much I could say right now.” To Seth, she stated, “Like, do you honestly think you can have whatever you want, hurt whomever you want, that somehow you’re entitled to keep changing your mind about the woman you want to be with? Well, let me be the first to finally tell you…you can’t.” To Holly, her voice softened, “I’m sorry you’re hurting. I’m sorry that this is happening to you. It’s not what I would have wanted.” Her eyes shut, and she drew in another deep breath before facing them again. “In the end, all I want to say is, don’t bring me into this mess. There’s a lot I can take, but that is the one thing I can’t. Because I, out of anyone in this entire fucked-up situation, don’t deserve it. Do I make myself perfectly clear?”
Heads hanging, both Seth and Holly nodded.
Evie spun on her heels, moved to the door, and yanked it open. “Now, go and talk this out.” She pointed to the doorway. “If you’re getting married, let me know, and I’ll be there. If you’re not, then I wish you two nothing but the best going forward.” She paused. Then, with exasperation, she stated, “Get out. Be grown-ups and deal with your shit.”
Holly rose first and, after hugging Evie, swiftly left the room, a blubbering mess with a pathetic Seth dragging his feet after her.
When Seth passed Grey, he asked, “Did you warn her?”
“No,” was Grey’s only reply.
The door slammed shut, and Grey regarded Evie as she moved closer, cautiously, but the distance was slowly killing him. He strode forward, reaching her in two big strides, taking her in his arms. “I’m sorry you had to go through that, Evie.”
She tensed.
Alarmed, he leaned away, discovering her eyes now narrowed on him.
“Did you know that Seth felt this way?”
It was his turn to heave a long sigh. “Yes, Evie, I knew.”
* * *
Grey’s words burned across Evie, smacking into her like a fist, and she took a step back, trying to understand why exactly this stung so bad. Regardless, for the first time since he entered the room, she actually got a good look at him. Dressed in black sport shorts that stopped at the knee, socks, and runners, he wore nothing else. His hair and skin glistened with the lingering sweat from his obvious workout, the sleeve of tattoos on his arm brighter than usual, his muscles seemingly more defined. Whether that was from the run he’d done before he entered the room, or the tension now between them, she didn’t know. But his chest seemed thicker, abs cut to perfection, even that sexy V there a treat for the eyes. Though none of that could distract her from a harsh truth she didn’t want to believe. “When did Seth tell you he had doubts about the wedding?” she asked, trying to make sense out of all this.
“When we went golfing.”
Evie blinked, absorbing that. “You knew since yesterday?”
“Yes.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked, the walls slowly beginning to close in, the ground rocky beneath her bare feet.
“Because it wasn’t my truth to tell.” His gaze hardened with each word, voice turning back into his business voice. “We had this weekend together. I wanted to enjoy you, not upset you.”
Her heart clenched, hurt in ways that felt all too familiar, but somehow it was even rawer now. And how confusing was that? She wasn’t supposed to become attached to Grey, that had never been the plan. “Did you tell him that it was up to me if I wanted to be with him?” she asked.
“Of course, I told him that,” Grey replied, though there was no softness in his voice, only conviction in the choice he made. “It is your choice. Even if you chose him now, I would not stand in your way.” His eyes narrowed, mouth pinched tightly before he added, “But I don’t give a shit about Seth. Nor would I help him get you back into his life.”
She paused and drew in a long, deep breath, thinking everything through. Of course, she understood Grey’s point. Still, his reasoning felt cold, detached, so not the relationship she’d ever see herself in. “You didn’t say anything else to him?” she asked.
“Why would I?” He took a step forward as if that settled everything.
“No.” She raised her hand, stopping him. “Please don’t.” Her mind swam with questions. He sounded so reasonable, but there was a thought tickling the back of her mind that she couldn’t reach.
“Evie, come here.” He held his arms wide. “Don’t be mad.”
“No,” she finally said, swallowing down humiliation. “You’re right. I shouldn’t be mad at you about any of this. We had a deal, and your deal didn’t include looking out for me. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have gotten upset with you.”
Something crossed his face then. Irritation, maybe. “Do not apologize.”
The problem was, she was mad, and she couldn’t ignore that. Because if anyone had been kind and supportive to her throughout all this, it was Grey. The guy she hadn’t expected that from at all. She noted the uncertainty in his eyes. That, though, couldn’t switch the sudden direction of her mind. It was like with all the emotion stuffed back and under control, logic took over.
At one time, this arrangement seemed okay because it was just sex for a few days. She could do that with Grey. No emotions, only raw, physical lust. But over the course of the weekend, things had changed. She realized now that maybe they’d changed for her and not him. And that explained why she felt so burned. She was beginning to like Grey. A lot, it seemed. “I can’t do this anymore.”
“What can’t you do?”
“This,” she said, drawing on all her strength to ensure she kept talking. “I can’t continue with this lie anymore. I mean, honestly, Grey, what are we doing here?”
He arched a single eyebrow. “We’re enjoying each other, Evie. It’s quite simple.”
She’d heard what he said, but somehow she couldn’t believe that anymore. “We enjoyed each other. But I’ve been fooling myself. Faking a relationship, that can’t work.” She moved into the closet and grabbed her suitcase. She knew what she had to do, as much as she’d known she had to leave Grand Rapids for Seattle. Because she’d always been that girl. Once she was decided on a plan, there was no stopping her.
When she returned to Grey and placed her suitcase on the bed, she continued, “Nothing good can come from this. You know it. I know it. We need to stop pretending.”
“Evie,” Grey said, more softly now. “You’re upset, and that’s completely understandable, but you’re making this about us when it shouldn’t be.”
“But it is about us,” she implored, unable to look at him, scared if she did, she’d lose her nerve. “This weekend was amazing, Grey. Honestly, maybe the happiest time in my life—”
His firm finger tucked under her chin, tilting her head up to meet his emotion-packed eyes. “Then what exactly is the problem?”
“The problem is that it’s not real.” She quickly moved away, aware of how easily she could lose herself in him and unzipped her suitcase. “It’s been a game, and you know that. You wanted to win, so you set up a scenario where you could, and I agreed because I didn’t want to face Seth and Holly alone.”
Grey visibly tensed, cursed, and folded his arms. “Why do women always have to make things so damn complicated?”
“Because we are complicated beings,” Evie said, returning to the closet. She took all her clothes off the hangers then returned to her case, tossing them inside before grabbing her toiletries from the bathroom.
When she added those to the case, too, Grey hadn’t moved an inch—he stood statue-still. “Why are you packing your bag?” Grey asked gruffly.
“I’m going to go stay with Holly.”
“You don’t need to do that,” he stated, grabbing her hand. “We fly home tomorrow morning. There’s no reason to change our plans because of what Holly and Seth are going through. Nothing has to change, Evie.”
“Everything has changed.” She ignored the way her skin sizzled at his touch and moved away from him. “The fact that I’m upset that you kept this from me means that I’ve changed. I can’t put myself in a situation where I’m the kind of woman you told me about.”
“What woman?”
“The woman who becomes too attached.”
At his silence, the tension in the room grew thick and heavy. She took her undergarments from the dresser, feeling her throat tighten.
Grey’s weighted voice came behind her. “I don’t understand any of this, Evie. Why are you even thinking this? Yesterday was amazing. Why can’t we continue where we stopped? Because I chose not to tell you about Seth’s feelings for you? You’re honestly that upset about that?”
“No, that’s not what I’m upset about.” She zipped up her suitcase, turning to him, laying her heart on the line. “I’m upset because you chose to think of how his feelings would affect your weekend over how they would affect me.” She placed her suitcase on the floor and then rolled it behind her as she approached. “And you made that decision because this was only sex. That’s okay. You don’t owe me a damn thing.” She paused, staring into his mesmerizing eyes and sighed. “You and I are not the same, Grey. We don’t want the same things out of life. And that’s okay, too. But I did this…” She lifted her chin and stated proudly, “I did this because I wanted you. I let myself believe that I could never care for you. But then you ended up being this amazing guy who surprised me in ways I totally wasn’t expecting you to. And while those are the best kind of surprises, they’re also dangerous.”
Grey’s nostrils flared, but that was the only indication that what she said even affected him.
She’d never been one to hide her feelings, and she knew she couldn’t hide them now. “This weekend gave me more than you can even know. I feel like you helped me find my way back to myself, and for that, I’ll always be grateful. But this, us continuing to pretend that this is real…it isn’t good for me. In fact, it’s setting me up to fail because I’ll want things from you that I shouldn’t.”
With her heart screaming at her to stay, but her mind telling her to go, she stood up on her tiptoes and kissed his flexed jaw muscles. Determined she was making the right choice for herself, she took a step away from him then stopped, realizing she wasn’t done yet. She glanced over her shoulder, and added, “You know what, Grey, I do believe in karma like you do,” she explained. “I believe that we had this time together for a reason. You got me in the way you wanted me, and I found healing in the most unexpected way. That was our thing, and no one can ever take that away from us.”
She moved to the door, and when she whisked it open, Grey’s voice blistered. “Evie.”
Her emotions in her throat, she turned back to him and waited for him to say anything…for him to ask her to stay because he wanted her there for more reasons than to only have her body.
She smiled softly at his silence and officially ended the fantasy. “Goodbye, Grey.”