My inner voice laughed itself sick at the situation. If you actually believe he was the least bit interested in you, you’re a complete idiot!

After two weeks, I started agreeing with the voice and prepared to forget Danijel.

I hadn’t heard anything from Vanessa since the festival, either, so I decided to call her. I caught her on her cell. “Hi,” I said, “long time no talk. Stressed out with work?”

“Jessica, hi!” she cried. She was anxious—I could hear it in her voice. “Sorry, I don’t have a lot of time. I’ve gotta get ready. Ricky will be here any minute!”

“Huh? Aren’t you in Munich?”

“Yeah. He’s coming to spend the weekend with me.”

Jealousy rose up within me like boiling lava. “Well, then. Have fun.”

She noticed the hollow note in my voice. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Everything’s great,” I nearly growled. “Enjoy your arrogant jackass.”

“Oh, crap!” She sighed empathetically. “It’s Dennis, isn’t it? He didn’t call, did he?”

“His name is Danny,” I said, annoyed. At her and myself. Why did I just call him by the nickname reserved for his friends? “And no, he didn’t call. Which was to be expected.”

“Sorry. Hey, I’ll ask Ricky what the deal is later.”

“Ugh, don’t. Don’t bother. I couldn’t stand him anyway.”

Despite the great distance between us, I could sense her smile through the phone.

“Right,” she said. “Well, I gotta go. I’ll call you soon as I get a few minutes. Love you, talk soon!”

Furiously, I punched the red “end call” button. Somehow I couldn’t help resenting Vanessa’s new fling, though I knew it was unfair of me. After all, I’d been in a long-term relationship up until just two months ago, while she’d been living the single life for years.

And, God, breaking up with Alexander had been difficult and stressful. I knew he was still holding out hope, because he called almost daily, embarking on campaign after campaign to win me back. The fact that I hadn’t heard from him in two days was almost a miracle. I shook my head. One guy called too often, the other not at all. It wasn’t the worst problem in the world to have, but still.

It was early on a Friday afternoon, and I didn’t know what to do with myself. Not that evening, or for the rest of the weekend. Vanessa wasn’t in town, and I sure as hell wasn’t about to go to Alexander’s. Sighing, I fetched my purse and pulled out the small, white business card. I studied it for a moment. Danijel Alaric Taylor was printed on it in thick, black letters. Odd way of spelling his first name, I noted.

His address was printed beneath the name. Besigheim—maybe half an hour away by car, but an epic journey by bus.

The bottom left-hand corner read:

Certified Personal Trainer

His work address would be equally impossible for me to reach without a car. And then, in the lower right corner, it said:

Martial Arts Center – South

Youth Coach

Martial arts. He spent his weekends kicking people in the face. Well, wonderful. Just getting better and better.

I took out my phone and dialed the number listed beneath his address.

He picked up on the second ring. “Hello?”

I swallowed hard—and didn’t say anything.

He hung up without another word. I stared at my phone, using every ounce of self-control I had to keep myself from calling back.

Finally, I threw my phone on the bed in exasperation and decided to take my dog, Leika, for a walk.

 

***

 

My phone rang unusually early for a Saturday. My heart leapt for joy. Pulse racing, electrified with anticipation, I retrieved my phone from the desk with trembling fingers—and discovered, to my disappointment, that it was Vanessa. My heart rate slowed back down to normal as I answered.

“Yeah?”

“Jess?” Vanessa was on Cloud Nine. I could tell immediately. “He’s amazing! Next weekend I’ll give you all the details.”

“Do it now,” I said.

“I can’t,” she whispered. “He’s in the bathroom!”

“Oh.” He was in the bathroom. Glittering jealousy came over me again.

“Good news,” she went on. “We’re going to the Mouse Trap next Saturday.” That was our usual dance club here at home. “Ricky’s picking me up and bringing me from Munich. You wanna come?” After a brief pause for dramatic effect, she added, “Danny and Simon are coming, too.”

My pulse sped right up again, and it wasn’t at the mention of Simon’s name.

“No way!” I snapped.

“Oh, come on. We’re meeting outside the Mouse Trap at ten. I thought maybe your brother could drop you, and then Ricky and I could drive you home.”

“I dunno,” I said. Mentally, I was already going through my closet, trying to decide what to wear.

 

***

 

As Thorsten pulled up in front of the club, he offered to come pick me up as well.

“No need,” I told him, opening the passenger-side door. “Tell Mom and Dad I’m staying at Alexander’s and might not be home until tomorrow.”

My brother nodded. He knew Alexander and I had broken up, and that I was just using our relationship as an excuse to stay out late without my parents worrying. But he covered for me without asking any questions.

I shuffled toward the Mouse Trap uncertainly.

Simon and Danijel were already standing at the entrance. I’d spotted them almost immediately, but I kept out of sight until Vanessa and Ricky came around the corner, hand in hand. Then I made a beeline for them.

“Nessa!” I cried, and she threw her arms around my neck. She was wearing skin-tight jeans again, and a different crop top underneath her short jacket. She looked fantastic. I shook Ricky’s hand and nodded to Simon. Danijel, I ignored.

“Don’t you disappear on us again tonight!” Ricky said, winking at me.

Ah. Vanessa had tattled on me. Put all the blame for our quick exit on me. Thanks a lot, friend.

The club was still fairly empty, and we found a quiet corner where we’d all be able to chat for at least another half hour or so. Assuming I managed to form words this time.

Vanessa and I sat down while the guys got drinks for us.

“Here!” Danijel pushed my Bacardi and Coke toward me with that pretentious grin of his. “Maybe that’ll make you a little chattier.”

That one sentence was enough—I made the mistake of looking at him. Even in the dim light, I noticed that his eyes were even bluer than I’d remembered. He traced his chin with his thumb and index finger, throwing me completely off guard all over again.

“You’re mad because I didn’t call,” he said plainly.

Ricky and Vanessa couldn’t get enough of each other. They were still holding hands and kissing constantly—not paying any attention to us. And Simon just drank his beer and smoked a cigarette.

I turned back to Danijel. “A promise is a promise,” I admonished him.

“You need to listen more closely,” he replied easily. I could feel his eyes on me. “I said I would call. I didn’t say when I would call.”

I gulped down nearly all of my drink at once. “When were you planning on calling, then?”

“I always keep my promises. I really had a lot to do. In all seriousness, I would have called.”

I almost wanted to believe him.

“And, speaking of that… The next time you plan on calling someone and not saying anything, it would be advisable to block your number.” He took a sip of his drink. “Comes across as rude otherwise.”

My cheeks reddened. I hoped it was dark enough that Danijel couldn’t see.

“What were you so busy with, then?” I demanded. It came out much angrier than I’d intended.

“I had an important competition that first weekend. The weekend after that, I had to work. Side job.”

“You mean you do martial arts competitions yourself, too?” I’d thought he was just a coach. The whole conversation thing was starting to work. Darkness and Bacardi were my friends.

“Yeah,” he responded curtly.

“Do you win?” I polished off my drink.

“Usually.” He pointed to my glass. “You want another? Seems to help.”

I nodded, and he fetched me another Bacardi and Coke. I threw most of it back immediately. The alcohol was already going to my head. I offered him the glass and what little was left. “You want some?”

He shook his head. “I don’t drink.”

“Why not?” I asked, shocked.

“Personal reasons.”

I shrugged and drained the glass.

“So what do you like to do?”

“Horseback riding,” I said. “Tournaments. Mainly dressage, through Class L. I win now and again, too. And amateur radio. I’ve just got a dinky little thing, though—only gets forty channels, which sucks because you get so much noise. Someday I’ll be able to afford one that gets eighty channels.”

“Ah.”

The club was starting to fill up, and it was getting progressively more difficult to talk.

Vanessa and Ricky indicated that they were going to go dance, and Simon followed them.

“You want to dance, too?” Danijel called to me.

“Do you even know how?” I shot back, suddenly cocky. Alcohol was a beautiful thing.

He nodded. “Just enough to get by.” With practiced smoothness, he grasped my wrist and drew me off to the dance floor like a puppy on a leash.

Just then, I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket. I stopped, pulled it out, and held it up. “Sorry, I have to take this.”

I extracted myself from Danijel’s grip and headed toward the bathrooms in hopes of finding a quiet spot. He followed me, probably afraid I would make another escape.

“Hello?” I shouted into the phone. It was Alexander. Just who I needed to talk to right now. I told him that no, I wasn’t at home, and yes, I was at the club, and no, not with ‘some guy,’ as he put it.

“No, I’m not coming over,” I said at the end. “Ever. Take care. Bye.” I stuck my phone back into my pocket, resolving not to answer it again.

Danijel raised a questioning eyebrow. “Your boyfriend?”

“Ex.”

“Hm.” He didn’t seem particularly convinced. “Is he aware of that?”

“We’re working on it. He is finding it a little hard to grasp.” I’d lost interest in dancing for the moment. “I need to find Nessa real quick,” I said and headed off. Danijel followed. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see his white T-shirt glowing under the black lights.

It took forever to find Vanessa. She and Ricky were off in the corner, completely entangled. A few feet away, Simon was dancing with a slightly pudgy redhead.

“Alexander called!” I shouted into Vanessa’s ear. “I think he’s going to show up here!”

I knew she was rolling her eyes, even if I couldn’t actually see it. “Why do you always tell him where you are?” she asked.

“This is where we always go dancing. He’s not stupid. Nessa, if he shows up here, I want to go home. Can you guys drive me?”

She didn’t exactly seem enthusiastic about the prospect of having to cut the evening so short—it was barely after midnight. “Just don’t answer your phone again. He’ll never find you in this crowd!”

Now I needed another drink. Somehow, I’d lost Danijel in the chaos, this time completely unintentionally. I decided to start by getting myself a Jack and Coke, take the opportunity to use the bathroom, and then look for him afterwards. If he hadn’t already found me by then, anyway. The guy seemed to stick to me like gum in my hair.

As I was drying my hands, my phone rang again. Angry, I grabbed my drink from the sink and chugged it. And that was too much for me. All at once, everything began to spin. I’d only taken my phone out so that I could shut it off, but I accidentally answered the call instead.

“I’m here,” Alexander said.

“You’re where?” I asked, slow to catch on.

“In the Mouse Trap parking lot. I know you’re in there.”

“What do you want?” I shrieked into the receiver.

“I just want to talk,” he assured me. “I came all the way out here. Just come out and talk for a minute, and then I’ll leave.”

A little fresh air would probably do me good. The restroom was now swaying ominously. I retrieved my jacket from the coat check and left the club.

Alexander’s enormous Jeep Grand Cherokee was hard to miss. It was parked across two spaces, with music blaring from the stereo and all four front lights on. Alexander himself was leaning against the chrome grill.

When he saw me, he started walking toward me. His blond hair was neatly gelled, and he was wearing the thin beige sweater I’d given him.

Suddenly, he narrowed his eyes and pointed behind me, glowering. “Who’s this douchebag?”

I turned around, confused. I hadn’t noticed that Danijel had followed me. He’d come out into the cool night air without a jacket and was standing a small distance behind me, his bare arms folded across his chest.

“That’s Danny,” I said, belatedly realizing I’d used his nickname yet again. It was probably too late to stop now. “We’re here together.”

“Good evening,” Danny said politely, but he made no move to uncross his arms and extend a hand.

“Right. Vanessa.” Alexander’s voice was full of contempt. “What’s he doing here with you?”

“I’m watching out for her,” Danny replied on my behalf, giving me an admonishing look. “She’s had a little too much to drink.” As if on cue, I tripped over my own feet and nearly fell.

“I’ll take over from here.” Alexander opened the passenger-side door. “Get in. We’re going home.”

I nearly obeyed the command on autopilot, but Danny stepped in front of me. “Maybe you should ask her if she wants to come with you,” he chided Alexander.

“She’s coming. End of story!”

Danny didn’t move. He fixed his eyes on Alexander, letting him feel the full effects of his penetrating, intimidating gaze. “Ask her if she wants to,” he snarled. His tone was so vicious I wasn’t even surprised when Alexander did as he was told.

“Would you like to come with me?” he asked with an exaggerated bow.

Tentatively, I shook my head. “Actually, no, I wouldn’t.”

Danny slammed the passenger door shut again. “Well, that settles that.” He slipped an arm around me. “Let’s get back inside. Why did you get so drunk, anyway?”

So that I can actually speak to you…

The intimate gesture must have set Alexander off, though, because he planted a rough hand on Danny’s shoulder. After halting our progress, he grabbed my wrist and pulled me back to his car.

I couldn’t suppress a laugh. Why did everyone like yanking on my arms so much?

Danny released me from Alexander’s grip, staring him down. Without warning, Alexander wound up and punched at Danny, who ducked away effortlessly.

“Now this is getting truly ridiculous,” Danny said calmly. “I suggest we end this little scene. Get back in your tricked-out toy and leave. Maintain what little dignity you have left.”

Without hesitation, Alexander grabbed Danny by the collar. In one quick motion, Danny spun free and twisted Alexander’s hands behind his back, holding them fast as he pushed Alexander toward the Jeep. He opened the driver’s-side door, shoved Alexander in, and slammed the door. “Drive safe,” he said, smacking the roof with his palm.

My ex was seething, but he didn’t dare get out again. He turned the radio all the way up and revved the engine loudly. For a moment, I was afraid he was going to run us both over, but he just swerved and sped out of the parking lot far too quickly. The scene seemed so familiar to me that I had to laugh again.

Danny watched the Jeep go. “Nice guy, that Alexander is.”

“Well, he doesn’t bet on getting girls’ phone numbers, so he’s got that going for him.” I let myself drop to the ground. It was pitching and rolling, which made me giggle even more.

Danny eyed me critically. “You should be in bed,” he declared as he gripped me beneath the arms and hefted me to my feet. “We’ll just go in for a second so I can get my stuff and let everyone else know, and then I’ll take you home. My car’s over there.”

“I’m doing great!” I protested.

Back inside the packed club, he dropped me off at the bar. “Don’t move. I’ll be back in two minutes.”

For the first time ever, I saw that there were plush mice hanging from the ceiling of the club, and the discovery made me burst out into gales of laughter.

Without my even noticing, Danny had returned. He gave me a concerned once-over. “Ricky’s gonna take Simon home later. I told them I’d take you. Can you walk?”

“Of course,” I slurred as I stood up from the barstool and then promptly went sprawling onto the floor.

Sighing, Danny helped me up, drawing one of my arms across his shoulders so he could guide me out to the parking lot. He unlocked his car from a distance and opened one of the back doors for me.

You have to go in the back like a dog, my inner voice piped up as I sank down onto the pale leather. The floor mats, the radio display, and even the inside lights were blue. Blue! He’d decorated his car to match his eyes. I dissolved into another fit of giggles.

“What’s so funny?” Danny asked as he got in.

“You!” I cackled.

“I’m glad I amuse you.” He turned on the GPS. “Tell me your address.”

I immediately sobered up a tick. “W-what?” I stammered. “I can’t go home like this. My parents would kill me!”

“Well, I guess you should have thought of that earlier. Address?”

“Just take me to the cemetery,” I moaned theatrically. “I’m sure there’s a grave free somewhere. Just throw me right in.”

I heard him sigh in resignation. Then I passed out.

 

The next thing I was aware of was Danny dragging me out of the car. Cold night air hit my face.

“Where are we?” I asked as he pushed me along in front of him.

“My place. It’s warmer here than the cemetery.”

I shrugged. Anything was okay with me, as long as I’d be able to sleep in peace.

We stopped in front of a small duplex, and Danny helped me inside the first-floor apartment. I heard quiet voices as soon as we stepped into the hallway.

“Wait here a second.” Danny gestured to make sure I’d understood the instructions, then walked down the hall into the living room. I followed him anyway, of course. To the right, there was a huge couch that also served as a room divider. To the left, there was a TV mounted on the wall—some sitcom was on. Danny picked the remote control up from the table and turned the TV off. There was a girl asleep on the couch. Jet-black hair concealed most of her face and hung all the way down to the floor. I guessed she was probably a year or two older than I was. Danny reached for the cotton blanket at the foot of the couch and covered her up.

“Who’s that? Your girlfriend?” That was a question I probably wouldn’t have had the guts to ask if I hadn’t been so drunk.

“Something like that,” he replied, pushing me back into the hallway. Carefully, he closed the door behind us. “That’s Christina. She’s sort of a fixture around here. You’re lucky she’s on the couch—it means you can sleep in my bed.”

For some stupid reason, that actually did make me happy. By the time we got to the bedroom, all I could think about was lying down. I threw my boots and jeans in a corner and wondered vaguely why I heard him sigh again.

As I began to remove my sweater, Danny took a T-shirt out of his dresser and threw it at me. “Here, you can sleep in that,” he said, turning his back to me so I could change. I wouldn’t have cared if he hadn’t.

I flopped down onto the double bed in my underwear and his T-shirt. Everything was spinning. I was dimly aware of him covering me up to the hips and then moving away.

Impulsively, I grabbed his hand and pulled it to my cheek. “Stay,” I pleaded. “I’m sick. I don’t want to be alone. I think I’m dying.”

“People don’t die that easily,” he said gently. There was an undertone in his voice I couldn’t quite place. But I was too tired to think any more about it.

“Stay here,” I murmured again, still clutching his hand.

“I’m staying,” he said, slowly getting into bed behind me. He slid his arm underneath my head, so that I was lying in the crook of his arm. Cautiously, he brushed a few strands of hair from my forehead and stroked my head a few times. Though I was half-asleep, I noticed what a soft touch he had. His sheets smelled like him, and I immediately felt safe and secure. Within seconds, I was out cold.

 

The sun hammered down on my eyelids. Sluggishly, I blinked into the hideously bright light. My head was killing me. The whole bed smelled so much like Danny that I immediately remembered where I was. The other side of the bed was empty, of course, and it didn’t look like anyone had slept there. I sat up carefully. If I moved slowly enough, the throbbing pain in my head stayed within manageable limits.

I looked around with interest. The bedroom was white, with pale beechwood furniture: a huge wardrobe, two night tables, and a dresser. The sheets I was tangled in were blue-striped cotton, and it didn’t surprise me that the curtains and bedside rug were blue as well.

The room was extremely clean and tidy, except for one pile of clothes in the corner. It took me a moment to remember who they belonged to. I felt a hot blush spread across my face.

One last time, I buried my nose in the pillow, drawing in the scent of shampoo, shower gel, and conditioner. I wished I could stay in his bed forever, but suddenly I was also incredibly embarrassed that I’d been lying around here half-naked. A painful realization dawned on me: even then, he still hadn’t tried anything. How much more evidence did I need that this guy wasn’t interested in me? Maybe he was gay…

Far too vividly, I recalled how he’d flirted with those two attractive girls at the festival and discarded the gay theory immediately.

Reluctantly, I climbed out of the bed to look for the bathroom. Clutching my pile of clothes to my chest, I snuck into the next room. It wasn’t a bathroom—it was a combination office and workout room. There was a desk beneath the window in one corner, and a punching bag in another. A gym mat was lying on the ground, and there was a chin-up bar or something like it attached to the ceiling. The wall was plastered with certificates, and a small collection of trophies was arranged inside a glass display case. Curious, I took a closer look.

Kickboxing, I discovered. Why couldn’t he play soccer or tennis like everyone else?

Another certificate was hanging to my left.

Oh my God!

He’d won the World Amateur Kickboxing Championships last year. Full contact, middleweight.

What the hell am I even doing here?

Suddenly I recalled that I was standing around in an unfamiliar apartment wearing only a T-shirt and panties, and that shook me out of my state of shock. I headed back into the hallway and tried the next door.

Bingo. I promptly got into the shower, found some women’s shower gel, and soaped up with it. The fact that a girl named Christina apparently lived here didn’t suit my plans at all.

Who the hell was she?

I took a towel out of the closet and dried off, then put on my jeans. My sweater stank terribly of cigarette smoke, so I decided to wear Danny’s T-shirt again. I toyed with the idea of using his toothbrush, but I couldn’t be sure if the blue one was really his, so I made do with gurgling a lot of mouthwash. Then I combed my hair out thoroughly and even used some of Christina’s deodorant. When I was finished, I felt like a new woman.

I emerged from the bathroom a good deal more self-confident. Hearing dishes clattering at the other end of the hallway, I followed the sound. The kitchen was small and cozy, with pale wood cabinets and a small, round table with two chairs.

“I set the table here in the dining room,” a friendly female voice called from the next room. “Come on in.”

Dining room? How big was this place? Why would one guy need this much space all to himself?

He’s not by himself, Jessica.

Resolutely, I went through the open door. The girl I’d seen on the couch the night before beamed at me. Christina. She was thin and delicate, with a remarkably pretty face.

“Good morning, Jessica,” she trilled.

At any other time, in any other situation, I would have liked her immediately, but I’d already decided to hate her with a burning passion for all eternity. Her outfit only increased my fury: even though it was autumn, she was wearing hot pants and a tank top with spaghetti straps and a plunging neckline. Her voluptuous breasts, clearly visible underneath the thin material, swayed with every step she took, leading me to conclude that she considered bras unnecessary. She studied me with emerald-green eyes nearly as piercing as Danny’s. If they’d been blue, I’d have assumed the two of them were siblings, just based on the intensity of the color. Apart from that, though, they didn’t look a thing alike.

“Sit down,” Christina said politely, pulling up a chair.

“Thank you,” I said and did as I was told.

“Danny’s out running,” she explained. “He should be back soon. He didn’t expect you to be on your feet this early. Would you like some coffee?”

“Yes, please.”

Christina bent across the table to fill my cup. Automatically, I stared at her cleavage—everything there was to see, I saw. Jealousy bubbled up within me like bile as I wondered whether she poured Danny’s morning coffee the same way.

She passed me milk and sugar, and I stirred both into my cup. There were fresh biscuits on the table, along with butter and several kinds of jam.

“Who are you, anyway?” I drank my coffee quickly, even though it was still much too hot.

“Christina,” she said. “But everyone calls me Tina.”

“Yeah, I know that. Are you guys roommates?”

She shook her head defensively. “No, this is Danny’s place. I’m just here temporarily.” She shrugged sheepishly. “Trouble at home, you know?”

“And he was kind enough to offer you his couch?” A fresh wave of jealousy washed over me.

“Actually, I have my own room. I just fell asleep on the couch last night.”

She was staying here temporarily, but she had her own room? Just how long was “temporarily”?

“Be glad I slept on the couch,” Christina went on. “Otherwise you would never have gotten into Danny’s bed.” She paused dramatically before adding, “Unfortunately, I must confess he spent the night in my bed, since you were in his.”

Was she trying to provoke me? Well, it worked. I took the bait. “You slept in the same bed? How nice.”

She smiled affectionately. “No, not yesterday, we didn’t. I was on the couch, remember? But I do sleep in his bed sometimes. Mostly when I can’t sleep, or I’m lonely.”

“How touching!” I said through gritted teeth.

Just then, Danny joined us in the dining room. My heart skipped a beat.

“Morning,” he said. He was still in his workout clothes, sweaty from running, his hair sticking out every which way. “You survived,” he said, beaming at me. “It’s a miracle!” He came up to the table and laid a hand on my shoulder for a moment. It felt like sparks flew out under his touch. I stared at him as though suffering from electric shock, but he kept walking toward Christina.

“I’m gonna take a quick shower,” he said, bending and kissing her on the temple like it was the most natural thing in the world. “Thanks for making breakfast, Tina.”

She gave him a friendly nod, and I gaped at him as he walked out again.

Seemingly sensing my distress, Christina sat down beside me and said, “Don’t worry. Danny’s not my boyfriend. Never has been.”

“Sure looks that way, though.” As I grumpily chewed a biscuit, I decided maybe I should at least try to like her.

When Danny joined us again, I acted like I didn’t notice.

“You all right?” he asked.

“Hmph.”

“Hey, how about I show you around,” Christina suggested. Although I’d have rather stayed with Danny, I followed her into the open-plan living room with large glass doors. The furniture was black wood, and for some reason, I found it comforting that none of it was blue. Christina opened the back door and slipped outside, wearing far too little for as chilly as it was. A tall hedge separated the small yard from the neighbors’, and there was covered patio furniture on the deck. It was all pretty idyllic.

Shivering, we went back inside, and she led me through Danny’s bedroom into the room beside it.

“This is his office and workout room,” she told me. “He usually works out in here at night, before he goes to bed.” I kept quiet about having been in there already, but I couldn’t help wondering what gave her the right to stroll around like she owned the place. To top it off, on the way back through his bedroom, she shook out the covers and neatly made the bed.

Then she showed me the room just to the right of the front door. “This is my room,” she declared proudly.

Size-wise, it was the same as the other one, minus the connected office. It had a bed, a couch, and a small desk with a clunky old laptop on it. Her clothes were strewn across the floor, along with untold quantities of high heels. I stared at the pencil-thin heels, trying to convince myself that I wouldn’t have broken my legs just trying to stand upright in them.

That’s when Danny came into her room. “I’ll take you home now,” he said, and I didn’t argue, though I would have liked to stay a while longer.

“It was nice to meet you,” Christina said, holding out a hand. She had an astonishingly firm handshake for such a skinny little thing. “See you around sometime.”

I couldn’t tell from her tone whether she wanted that to happen or hoped it wouldn’t. “Yeah, for sure,” I replied weakly. “Thanks so much for breakfast.”

She waved, and I gathered up the rest of my things and followed Danny to the car. He opened the passenger door.

“Oh, today I get to sit up front?” I asked sarcastically.

“Just for today,” he replied playfully. “Don’t get used to it.” He started up the GPS, and I told him my address. Pumping music I didn’t recognize thundered out of the CD player for a moment before he turned the volume down. All at once, I felt like I needed to thank him. After all, not everyone would have let someone they didn’t actually know just spend the night in their house.

“Thanks,” I said quietly. “For looking out for me and all that.”

“No problem. In the future, though, you should probably only drink as much as you can handle… So, ideally, just stick to water, I guess.”

He followed the GPS’s instructions—driving much too fast. But something about him made me feel entirely safe, so I decided not to say anything. Idly I checked my phone and discovered two texts from Nessa.

Did you get home okay?

Jess? Let me know!

I typed a reply:

 

Hi, Nessa, everything’s fine. I stayed at Danny’s; he’s taking me home right now. I’ll call you later.

Grinning, I put the phone away. “I think Vanessa’s pretty crazy about your friend Ricky,” I told Danny. “I hope he isn’t using her.”

“They’re both old enough to know what they’re doing,” he said.

“So, Christina,” I said. “Who is she?” I couldn’t help it. I had to know.

“My best friend. She’s staying with me for a while.”

Right. And I probably wasn’t going to get any new information with this tactic. I decided to drop it for now.

The drive didn’t take long. Danny maneuvered his BMW into the guest parking space beside my parents’ building and then pulled the parking brake. He left his hand there and looked at me expectantly. “You’re home,” he said.

Hesitantly, I reached for his hand, wanting to take it as I said goodbye, maybe even give it a quick kiss.

“Don’t,” he snarled, jerking his hand away, looking at me like I’d tried to bite him.

I could only gape at him.

He crossed his arms.

“Um. I… I was just…um… I mean, I thought… I thought…”

“I couldn’t care less what you thought, Jessica. Goodbye.”

I remembered the way he’d tenderly run his fingers through my hair just a few hours before—in his bed. What the hell was going on here? This guy was a walking contradiction.

“Are you throwing me out or something?” I asked, hurt.

“Not yet, but I’ll have to if you don’t get out soon.”

“Why are you treating me like this all of a sudden?” At the very least, he owed me an explanation.

He pursed his lips and took a deep breath, as though he was having a hard time controlling himself. “Listen,” he said, a shade more gently, “I’m sorry if you got the wrong idea somehow, but I’m really not interested in a relationship and all that crap. My life is complicated enough. There’s no place for you in it. So I’d really appreciate it if you’d just get going.”

I felt a painful twinge in the pit of my stomach. Then the disappointment gave way to rage. “You’re pathetic! A pathetic, fake asshole!”

“So,” he said in a dangerously calm voice. He got out of the car, strode quickly around the front, and opened the passenger door. “This is when I throw you out.”

I scoffed indignantly. “Go to hell!”

“I can’t until you get out of my car!”

Without another word, I sprang from my seat and batted his hand away from the door before slamming it shut. Then I pushed past him with my chin held high, clutching my purse against my chest. I just wanted to get inside so I could lick my wounds. Tears of disappointment sprang to my eyes before I reached the front door. I wept silently, grieving the loss of something I had never even had.

That night, I tossed and turned for a long time before finally falling into a fitful sleep.

 

I’m running down a narrow alley, drenched in sweat. My heart is hammering wildly, and the ground is melting away underneath my feet. I turn around, terrified. The road behind me is blurring as well, sinking into an ocean of icy blue. The walls on either side of me are closing in slowly, transforming into thick, blue fog.

The color blue is everywhere, enveloping me, choking the air out of my lungs.