As I walk away from the marina, I struggle to draw in a breath, the weight of devastation crushing me. I’d tried not to get my hopes up, knowing that it was a long shot that Bronn would believe me, and yet, here I am, absolutely heartbroken.
After the appeal hearing, when Bronn and I had fought, I thought that we would find a way through this. I thought that if I just gave him some time and space, a chance to wrap his mind around this insane turn of events, that we would be okay.
I didn’t expect him to embrace my father with open arms, but I also didn’t think he would shun me. The feeling of rejection had stung, but I’d sucked it up, knowing that he was going through a tough time. It had been a shock to find out that my father was alive, and an even bigger blow when I realized that he was responsible for the death of Bronn’s dad. But I was given a second chance at a relationship with a man that I thought was gone forever.
Bronn would never get that chance, and I know that had to sting. I could only imagine how he was feeling about everything. And then I had pushed him, telling him that the truth he had believed for so long was wrong, that he was wrong. It was no wonder he had pushed me away.
But, I’d given him time and space. And during that time I’d learned the truth. And now it was his turn to be understanding, to be open-minded.
But, he wasn’t.
So, there was no chance of things ever going back to the way they were between us.
And I was shattered.
I wanted a life with him. We had been in such a good place and things had been looking up. Bronn’s bar had been doing incredibly well. He was proving himself to the people of this town, showing them that he was so much more than another sad statistic.
Work at the hospital had been good for me. I felt positive that I would be staying here, my contract extended.
Nana had passed away, and while it was sad to have lost my last living relative, I was relieved. I no longer had the burden of duty hanging over my head.
Yes, things had been amazing.
And then the sky had fallen and all of that had been turned upside down.
As I climb into my car, my gaze is glued to the marina. My stomach churns with the ridiculous hope that Bronn will come racing down the dock, waving his arms and begging me to wait. But he never appears, and after a few moments I start the engine and pull away, tears rolling down my face as I drive away from the only man that I’d ever loved.
“You don’t have to go,” Riley says, his face lined with worry. “You’re welcome to stay as long as you need.”
I can’t blame him for wanting me to stay. I’ve been a virtual zombie these last few weeks. When I came back from the visit with Bronn I’d been a wreck. But I can’t stay here any longer. “I’ve got to get back to work. They were nice enough to give me time off, but I can’t push it any longer.”
The hospital had been so accommodating; I was so thankful to not have to worry about my job on top of everything else.
“You can find a job here, you know.”
I shake my head. “My contract with the travel agency says that I have to go where they send me. Besides, I want to be in Beaufort.”
My heart twists just saying the name of the town, but it’s true. Beaufort is home now. Despite the way things have turned out between Bronn and I, the coast is still the place that I feel the most at ease. I don’t want to move back here.
“What about your dad?”
I put the shirt I’d been folding into my suitcase and sit on the edge of the bed. Riley continues to lean against the doorframe, his hands in the pocket of his dress slacks, his eyes full of concern.
A small part of me wishes that it was him that I’d been attracted to, him that I’d fallen in love with. That would have been so much easier.
If it had been Riley and not Bronn, then maybe my chest wouldn’t ache as though there were a gaping wound where my heart should be. If it were Riley and not Bronn, perhaps I wouldn’t have spent the last few weeks with my eyes permanently swollen and red. If it were Riley and not Bronn, maybe I wouldn’t have to simply “get through” each day, praying that I would somehow find sleep every night.
But it wasn’t Riley that I was in love with.
Not even close.
Not even a little bit.
It was Bronn.
And if there was anything that I knew, it was that life, and love especially, was never easy.
I cared for Riley. He had always been a good friend and had more than proven his friendship, being the shoulder I’d cried on, the ear that listened to me, the shelter that I’d needed.
I’d forgiven him for keeping my father’s existence from me. He’d apologized a hundred times over, bending over backward to help me get information, contacting fellow attorneys, calling in favors so that I could begin the process of getting my dad a fair trial.
I push to my feet and begin to empty out another drawer in his guest bedroom, the place that I’d called home for the last two weeks.
“I’ll be back to visit Daddy next weekend. His attorney said that it would be a while before he had any real news on the case, so all I can do is wait.”
Riley pushes away from the door and pads into the room, pulling another one of my suitcases from the closet. He sets it on the bed and then sits down beside it. “Don’t you think you need more time?”
“No,” I reply firmly. “I can’t just sit around anymore, letting my mind dwell on the what ifs. I need the distraction that work will offer.”
“What about Bronn?” he asks, the name causing me to flinch.
I sigh, my shoulders dropping, and look up at the ceiling. I don’t want to talk about him, don’t want to say his name, and don’t want to think about him.
Clearing my throat, I turn and lean against the dresser. “What about him?”
He frowns. “You didn’t tell me how it went today.” He waves hand in my direction. “Clearly not well, but you didn’t tell me what he said.”
I wrap my arms around my belly, hoping that it will ease the churning of my stomach. “He said he didn’t believe me,” I tell him simply.
There’s no point in going into detail about our conversation and, honestly, I can’t bring myself to say everything aloud. It’s hard enough that I keep playing it over and over in my head, trying to figure out if I could have said something different, something more. Should I have taken the letters with me? Should I have insisted that he believe me? Refused to leave until we had come to an agreement? I don’t think anything would have changed his mind, no matter how hard and long I begged or pleaded with him to accept my father’s story.
“I’m sorry, Grace.” His voice is full of compassion, his eyes filled with honesty.
I lift a shoulder. “It is what it is.” My voice is wobbly, tears threatening to fill my eyes again. When one spills over, I swipe at it angrily. I press my lips together and shuffle over to where he sits on the bed, sitting beside him.
I’m sick of crying, tired of the constant lump in my throat, the inability to speak without worrying that I’ll burst into tears at any moment.
Resting my head on his shoulder, I tell him, “You’ve been such a good friend to me.” I laugh. “It would have been so much easier if I’d stayed here, fallen for you.”
He chuckles. “Yeah, I’d have to say I agree with that.”
I lift my head from his shoulder and offer an apologetic smile.
“But you know, I’ve never seen you smile as much as you did when you were with him,” he tells me, taking me by surprise. I raise my brows and he nods. “Really, I mean it. You were happy. Even I could see that.”
“I was happy. For the first time in my life, the weight that I’d carried with me wasn’t as heavy. When I was with him, I was able to be myself.” I look over and smile sadly. “No offense, but even when we were out with friends, I had to put on a front. Be perfect, dress perfect, smile, and pretend that I loved spending my evenings at the country club. But with Bronn…” I drop my head, trying to conceal the tears, “I was just me. And dammit, it felt good to just be me.”
Riley wraps an arm around my shoulder and pulls me in for a hug, the contact brief before he releases me and stands.
“You deserve to be you. Because you are pretty fucking special.” He tips his chin. “Give it time, he’ll come around.”
I shake my head and laugh. “Oh, I don’t think so.”
Riley nods, insisting. “Trust me. He’s not going to let you get away.”
“Even if we wanted to be together, how could we? My father killed his. He thinks that my dad is a cold-blooded killer. How would we ever get past that?”
My heart squeezes.
Saying it out loud, it sounds that much worse. There’s no hope for us, no chance that it will ever work out. And there’s no point staying here and crying about it.
I’ve got to get on with my life, and sleeping in my friend’s guest bedroom and pining over a man that I’ll never have again is not the way to do it.
With a heavy sigh, I stand and go back to the dresser to finish packing.