Carter tells me the most awful story, a story of his life. Of abuse, both physical and mental. Of the evil future his father set for him when he was just a little boy. By the time he finishes, I understand him a lot better and why he wanted to work for my father. But he doesn’t know that my father might be equally as awful as his.

I’m about to tell him what I discovered on the website Gaige hacked into when Carter divulges a detail that makes my stomach churn.

“My father isn’t even my father.” He stares down at our interlocked fingers. “Winston is.”

“What?” I whisper in shock. “How did you… What?”

Clutching my hand, he meets my gaze. “Gregor told me that night you found out about our deal. I was actually thinking about going back on the deal and telling you the truth before he ever sent me that text. But then Gregor told me that Nicholas wasn’t my real dad and that if Nicholas found out about it, he’d hurt me and El and my mom. He also told me that if I didn’t go through with our deal, he’d tell my father.”

“I hate my father. I don’t care if I haven’t even met him. What he does… I hate him.” My eyes burn with tears, but I bottle up the pain and focus on the bigger problem. “Are you sure he was telling the truth about Winston being your dad? Maybe he was lying to you.”

“No, later that night, after you took off, my mom confirmed that it was true,” he says miserably. “She also implied that if Winston found out El and I were his kids, he’d probably kill us.”

My chest constricts. “What? Why?”

“Because I’d be his oldest son, which means by mafia rules, I’d be in line to become leader. But Winston already has what he thinks is an oldest son who he’s been training to take over his position. If I come into the picture, I ruin that.” He yanks his free hand through his blond hair. “It’s fucking stupid, though, because I wouldn’t even want the job. All I want is out. But I know they won’t let me out. Not without killing me.”

My chest tightens even more, making it harder to get air into my lungs “And what about El? Why would he hurt her?” I whisper.

“Winston might not. It’s hard to say.” He rubs his lips together as he contemplates. “You can’t tell anyone. If the wrong people found out, El could get hurt.”

“And so could you.”

“I know.” He seems to care less about that fact, like he doesn’t care much about himself at all. That’s not the Carter I know, which makes me question how much I know him, how much of a façade he put on for everyone.

“I promise I won’t tell anyone.” I vow and then vow to myself to unravel who he is, to get him to open up to me. “But Carter, you need to tell El about Winston. She deserves to know—about all of this.”

“I don’t want her knowing everything,” he says tightly. “She’s had a decent life and I don’t want to ruin that for her.”

“She hasn’t had that great of a life. Trust me.” I scoot closer to him until our shoulders touch. Any anger I may have felt for him has dissipated, and all I feel now is compassion and the need to help him and El. “If you don’t want to tell her everything, then fine. But you need to at least tell her about Winston.”

“I know I do.” He shivers as I lightly trace my finger along the elevated scar.

“I’m sorry you had to go through this,” I say softly. “But please, don’t go to work for my dad. Find another job or something, but you need to cut ties with Gregor.”

“I was already thinking about it.” His eyelids lower shut as I trace my finger back and forth along his palm. “But why don’t you want me to?”

“For a lot of reasons, but the biggest is that his business involves sex trafficking, drugs, prostitution—a lot of messed up stuff.” Vomit burns at the back of my throat at the reminder of the photos I saw on his site.

His eyelids fly open. “How do you know that?”

I swallow down the urge to puke my guts out again. “Because Gaige hacked into this secret site my dad has and I saw a list of the services his business offers. I don’t know how he’s getting away with it—why he hasn’t been arrested yet.”

“Probably for the same reason Winston’s gotten away with murder so many times.” His jaw ticks. “Because lawyers like my father—like Nicholas—get him acquitted. I think they pay off a lot of the law enforcement too.”

I shake my head in disgust, strands of my tangled brown hair falling into my eyes. “I can’t believe they’re getting away with it… And that my father is part of such… ugliness.” Ugliness seems like too mild of a word for what I saw on that site, though. “It makes me sort of hate myself.”

“Hey, this has nothing to do with you.” He splays his fingers across my cheek, his gaze firmly carrying mine. “You’re the sweetest and most caring person I know. Don’t ever think differently.”

“That’s not true at all,” I deny. “And what my father is doing—it does have to do with me.”

He narrows his eyes at me. “No it doesn’t, so stop saying that. You didn’t even know who your father was until a few days ago.”

“Yeah, but now I do know who he is and what he does, which means if I don’t do anything, then I’m just as bad as him.” I suck back the tears wanting to pour out. “Maybe even worse. I need to do something about it.”

“Are you saying you want to go to the cops?” Wariness masks his expression. “Because that could be really dangerous since a lot of officers are on Gregor’s payroll. And Winston’s.”

“I have to at least try,” I state determinedly. “I won’t be able to live with myself if I don’t.”

His hand travels down my face and comes to rest on the back of my neck. “Ens, I love that you want to put an end to this shit, but going to the police could get you killed.”

His warning slams the oxygen out of my lungs.

Killed. It could get me killed? Just like Winston wants to kill me?

How did my life get so messed up?

My father came into it. That’s how.

“Then what am I supposed to do?” I choke out. “Just sit back and pretend everything’s okay? That I’m okay sitting around in this stupid motel, hiding from Winston, while knowing my father is out there, ruining innocent people’s lives. And that eventually he wants to see me? Because I don’t want to see him. At all.”

“That’s not what I’m saying.” He dazes off over my shoulder with a crinkle between his brows. “We just need to be careful about what we do. Make a plan and find some good people we can trust that’ll help us do something.”

“Do what exactly?” I wonder. “I mean, how can a group of teenagers take down the mafia and a wealthy businessman who basically runs Fareland?”

“I haven’t gotten that far yet, but I’m thinking there’s a couple of ways we can go. One, we can get Winston and your dad to full on fight out this little war going on and hope they both eliminate each other. Two, we can try to get ahold of some police outside of the Fareland jurisdiction and report them. But with how good Winston and Gregor cover up their tracks, we’ll probably need more evidence.”

“Well, Gaige hacked into Gregor’s website. I’m sure he can do it again.”

“Yeah, that might work. I just worry about who we can trust.” A breath falters from his lips. “I’m not sure how far Winston’s power expands, but from what I’ve overheard, I’m guessing pretty far. And your dad’s pretty similar to him, so I’m sure his goes equally as far out, if not further. And if the wrong officer overheard us talking to the police, Winston and Gregor would know within minutes and we’d all probably end up…” He sinks his teeth into his lip so forcefully his lip starts to turn white.

“Dead,” I finish for him.

He releases his lip. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“That’s very chivalrous of you.” I attempt to joke but miss the mark. I sigh. “But I don’t want you to protect me. That’s not the kind of girl I want to be. I want to be able to protect myself.” Rage storms in my chest. “No, what I want is for us to find a way to take Gregor and Winston and Nicholas down. I want to free those women and children on my father’s site. I want to shut down his businesses.”

“I know you do.” He tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear. “We’ll try to figure out a way. I promise.”

“So, you’re with me?” I ask with hope. “You’ll help me do this?”

He nods. “But not just your father. Everyone who corrupts Fareland. We’re going to need everyone on board if we’re going to even attempt to pull this off. Well, either that, or we’re going to need to get rid of the people who won’t help us.”

“Like kill them?” I squeak.

Carter’s eyes go huge. “What? Fuck no. That’s not what I meant at all.”

“Oh.” I relax. “Sorry, I don’t know why I thought that. I think all this,” I gesture at the motel room. “Is messing with my head.”

“That’s understandable. You’ve been through a lot in the last couple of days.” He pauses. “But Ens, I promise I’m not a killer.”

“I know you’re not.” I feel so awful. “I wouldn’t be sitting here with you if I thought that.”

“Good.” The tension in his shoulders loosens. “When I said get rid of the people who won’t help us, I mean either ditch them or we’ll have to talk about this when they’re not around. But it’d be better if we could get everyone to help.” He absentmindedly plays with a strand of my hair, raveling it around his finger. “Holden’s probably going to be a problem, though.”

“He’s your friend. Can’t you persuade him?”

Carter lets out a hollow laugh. “Is he my friend? Neither of us ever mentioned we were working for Gregor, yet Holden knew I was helping him.”

“El and I don’t tell each other everything.”

He lifts a brow. “You told her about all of this.”

“Yeah, I know.” I sigh. “We’ll have to figure out a way to handle Holden, but I’m pretty sure Gaige might help us. And El definitely will.”

He unravels my hair from his finger with a frown. “How do you know you can even trust Gaige? You know who his father is, right?”

I nod. “But he’s my friend and he’s here with me and hasn’t ratted me out to his father yet, which says a lot about him.”

Carter’s lips thin. “You two seem close.”

I shrug. “We’re friends and friends are close.”

“Have you guys ever dated?”

I start to roll my eyes, but then pause. Does he sound… jealous? Carter is jealous at the idea of me dating Gaige?

“No. Although, I wonder if one day El and him will hook up. The two of them are bursting with sexual tension. Neither of them will admit it, though.”

He gags. “Yeah, I didn’t need to hear that.”

I giggle and a smile lights up his face. But then he grows serious again, his heated gaze straying to my lips. I think about our earlier kiss, how wonderful his lips felt against mine, how amazing my body felt as I grinded against him. I can’t even believe how I reacted to his kiss, how little control I had over my body. Then again, I had the same reaction back at the lake when he kissed me.

My cheeks flush as I remember just how much I enjoyed grinding against him, and he more than notices.

He strokes my cheek with his finger with an amused glint in his eyes. “Why are you blushing?”

I shrug, trying to play it cool. “Am I?”

His lips tug into a cocky smirk. “You are.”

“Maybe I’m just a little—”

His lips crash against mine, sending a flurry of passion through my body. But the ache inside my heart still remains.

“Carter,” I breathlessly whisper against his lips. “I’m sorry you had to go through what you did.”

His chest rises and crashes as he rests his forehead against mine, breathing raggedly. “It’s okay. It’s not your fault.”

“I know but you never should’ve had to suffer through any of the things that you did.” Leaning back, I take his hand and place a delicate kiss on the scar.

A breath fumbles from his lips and then he moves in to kiss me again, softly, slowly, as if we have all the time in the world, which we don’t. But at the moment, I don’t care.

We kiss for what feels like hours, our hands wandering all over each other, our limbs tangling. We kiss until my lips feel swollen, until I’m breathless, until I forget where I am and who I am and everything going on around me. I get lost, consumed by him.

“Do you know how much I’ve dreamt about kissing you like this?” he whispers as he paves wonderfully warm kisses down my neck, across my collarbone, and to the collar of my shirt.

“Probably not, since up until a few weeks ago, I thought you hated me—” I gasp and thread my fingers through his hair as he grazes his teeth along my collarbone.

He chuckles at the breathy whimper that escapes my lips and then he gently sinks his teeth into the side of my neck, gently biting my skin. “Does that feel good?” he teases.

“Kind of,” I lie because it feels really good. Really, really good.

“Liar,” he teases under his breath. Then he gently bites down on my neck again, sucking on the skin until I’m gasping so profusely I can barely keep my lungs functioning.

“Carter,” a pleading whimper leaves my lips. I don’t even know what I’m begging for.

Groaning, he moves away, but only to seal his lips to mine. His hands skim down across my chest, along my stomach, and to the hem of my shorts. His tongue parts my lips as he undoes the button and then his hand dips inside of my shorts.

He pushes back. “Is this okay? I don’t want to push you into doing something you don’t really want to do, especially with everything going on.”

My heart races. I’m not sure if I’m ready to go there yet, if I want to go that far, mostly because I’m scared and nervous. But I find myself nodding anyway. Who the heck knows why, other than maybe the girl with a crush on Carter side of me wants this. Badly.

Then he’s kissing me again as he slips a finger inside me. Soft whimpers fumble from my lips as I clasp onto his shoulder blades, trying to hold on to reality. But eventually, I just let go.

And fall.

And fall.

And fall.

To the most breathtaking place ever.

By the time I return to reality, I’m breathing heavily and Cater is staring down at me like I’m the most fascinating person who’s ever existed.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” I wonder as I work to regain my breathing.

“Because you’re beautiful.” He says the words so simply, as if it’s a given.

And I want to believe him, see myself how he says he sees me, but I still don’t think I’m quite there yet. It doesn’t really matter, though. Whether I’m beautiful or not isn’t going to help me take down Gregor, Nicholas, and Winston.

“I like seeing you like that.” He tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear. When I blush, he grins.

“Enough to put me in your fuck chest?” I tease, trying to get the upper hand.

He shakes his head, playfully glaring at me. “For the record, it’s not a fuck chest. It was more of a little black book than anything. And I didn’t even hook up with most of the women in those photos.”

“It doesn’t really matter. I’m just teasing you.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want you thinking I fucked all of them.”

“Why? It’s in the past.”

“Yeah, but that’s not really who I am and I need you to know that. That the guy you thought you knew, didn’t really exist.” He nibbles on his bottom lip. “And I want you to know that you’re the only girl who’s ever made me feel this way.”

My heart pitter patters in my chest. “What way?”

He considers his next words carefully. “Like I’m falling.”

“You feel that too?” I whisper.

He nods and then slowly lowers his head. “I have for a while—”

“All right, you two, open up!” El shouts as she bangs on the door. “I need to make sure you’re both alive and that I don’t need to report a murder.”

Carter grunts in frustration while I bust up laughing.

“She’s such a pain in the ass,” he grumbles, shaking his head.

“She just cares about us.” I give him one more kiss before pulling away. “We should probably let her in so you can tell her about Winston.”

“Just a few minutes longer,” he begs and then kisses me again before I can answer.

I wouldn’t have said no anyway.

A few more minutes turns into several and several might have turned into hours if El didn’t start banging on the door again.

Cursing in frustration, Carter sits up, zips up my shorts, and does up the button. Then he brushes his lips against mine, stands up, and pulls me to my feet.

“You’re going to tell her, right?” I ask as we head toward the door. “About Winston being her father, I mean.”

Carter exhales deafeningly. “Yeah, I guess I should, shouldn’t I?”

I nod and give his hand a squeeze. “It’ll be okay. El’s pretty tough, like you.”

He offers me a small smile and then kisses me again before answering the door.

“About freaking time,” El says. “I seriously thought one of you was dead.”

“Well, we’re not,” Carter replies, still grasping my hand.

El more than notices too. “So, I take it things went well during your private talk?” she asks, glancing between the two of us.

Carter looks at me. “I know they did for me, but I’ll let Ens speak for herself.” He stares at me, as if eager to hear my answer.

“Things went great.” For some stupid reason, I blush.

Carter more than notices and, with a chuckle, leans in and places a soft kiss against my cheek. “You’re adorable.”

“Don’t start with that again,” I warn, wagging my finger at him.

“Fine, then.” He battles back a grin. “You’re cute.”

I dramatically roll my eyes. “And you’re annoying.”

His lips tilt into a lopsided grin. “Adorably annoying, you mean.”

“Oh my God.” El makes an exaggerated gagging noise. “Is this how you two are going to be now that you’re dating?”

Dating? Are we dating now? Does it even matter with everything else going on?

“Yeah it is, so get used to it,” Carter replies, unintentionally answering my questioning thoughts.

But more questions instantly flood my mind.

Wait, do I want to date Carter?

Yeah, I really, really do.

El goofily grins at me like she can completely read my mind. I stare her down hard, silently begging her to shush. “So, why were you guys in there for so long?” Her grin magnifies.

“We were just talking,” I lie, giving her a dirty look.

“Sure you were.” She rolls her eyes.

“We were,” I insist. Well, for part of the time. “And actually, Carter needs to talk to you about something.”

Her smile fades as her forehead crinkles. “Why?”

I give Carter’s hand an encouraging squeeze and he sighs.

“I need to tell you something important.” He untangles his fingers from mine and walks back into the room.

“What? Does he want me to follow him?” El seems utterly perplexed.

I nod. “He needs to tell you something important.” I give her a hug. “I’ll be outside if you need me.”

“Okay…” She sounds lost but steps into the room anyway.

I leave and shut the door, giving the two of them some privacy. When I step outside, I spot Gaige sitting on the hood of El’s car, smoking a joint. And Holden is nowhere to be seen, something I’m sort of grateful for.

Maybe I can talk to Gaige about our plan now.

I cross the gravel parking lot, hiking toward him, wrapping my arms around myself. The only light comes from a few neon signs on the motel and the stars and moon are shining in the sky. The darkness creeps me out, but that might be more because the mafia is after me.

I hoist myself onto the hood beside Gaige. “So, where’s my bodyguard?”

He passes me the joint. “He wandered off in that direction,” he hitches his thumb over his shoulder, “About twenty minutes ago. I have no idea where he went and honestly, I didn’t care enough to ask.”

“Some bodyguard he is,” I joke then put the joint to my lips and take a hit.

He rests back on his elbows. “Yeah, well, at least you have me.”

I take another hit and then lean back, debating how to approach what Carter and I talked about—about changing the way Fareland works. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Do you ever… Do you ever wish you weren’t born into this life?”

“All the time,” he admits, turning his head toward me. “How about you? How are you doing with everything?”

“Honestly?” Smoke snakes from my lips as I exhale, “I fucking hate it… So does Carter.”

“Really?” he questions. “Then why is he so mixed up in everything?”

I shrug. “It’s a long story, but I know he does hate it. And he wants to change it.”

His reaches for the joint. “Change what?”

God, I hope I can trust him. “Change the way Fareland works and put people like Gregor behind bars.”

He chokes on the hit he takes. “You want to take down Gregor?” He pounds his chest as he coughs.

I give a nervous nod. “And not just Gregor, but all of the mafia too.”

He silently stares at me, smoke lacing the air, and I can’t read him at all, causing fear to spike through me. But I press on, reminding myself that this is Gaige, my friend, not a mafia baby offspring.

“And we want you to help us.”

“Take down the mafia?” he asks blankly.

I nod, getting more uneasy by the second. “And all of their businesses.”

“And how do you plan on doing that?” He hands me the joint.

“I haven’t gotten that far yet, although Carter came up with a few ideas.” I let the smoke burn away my fear. “I have to do something, though. I won’t be able to live with myself if I don’t try to stop what my father’s been doing.” The images of those girls I saw on the website flood my thoughts and my hands begin to tremble with rage.

He restlessly drums his fingers against his knees. “You’ll never be able to do it by yourself.”

“I know, that’s why I want you to help me. Well, me and Carter and El if she agrees to help. But knowing El, I’m sure she will.”

“I’m sure she will too,” Gaige agrees, nodding. “But that’s not enough. If you want to take down all the corruption in Fareland, you’re going to need a fucking army.”

“Oh.” Reality smashes against my lungs.

How am I ever going to do this?

“I may know a way to get some more people to help us.” He lowers his feet to the ground and slips off the hood of the car. “But everyone would have to be one hundred percent committed before I go into the details.”

“I am and so is Carter.” I hop off the hood and stand beside him. “We can ask El, but I’m sure she will be.”

He bobs his head up and down, takes the joint from me, and inhales. “Fuck, I can’t believe I’m even talking about doing this. I’ve thought about it a lot—about stopping all the fucked up shit going on in Fareland—but I’ve never had the balls to even speak about it aloud. And then there’s you. Three days of living in this world and you’re already ready to try to stop them.”

“I think it’s different for people born into this world, though,”’ I tell him, wondering if Gaige’s father treats him the same way as Carter’s does. “You guys learn from an early age to fear the men in charge. I haven’t had that fear put into me yet.”

“Still, you’re very brave, Ens. You always have been.”

“And you’ve always been such a good friend.”

“Even though I never told you my dad was in the mafia?” he questions.

“We all have our secrets.” I scuff the tip of my boot against the dirt. “Besides, I’m sure you were sworn to secrecy.”

He positions the joint between his lips. “I was, but how did you know?”

I give a one-shoulder shrug. “I watch a lot of movies.”

He laughs, the sound carrying across the night. “Well, just so you know, the movies aren’t always right.”

“So you guys don’t cut off people’s fingers to torture them?”

“I haven’t, but I’m sure my dad has.” He sinks into silence as he takes another hit off the joint. “Ens, I want to make sure you want to do this. It’s going to be dangerous and if we get caught…” He doesn’t finish. And he doesn’t have to. Carter already painted a pretty clear picture of what the consequences will be if we get caught.

“I know what the dangers are.” I square my shoulders. “And I’m still in.”

Smoke clouds around his face as he exhales. “I’m kind of glad we’re—”

“You know, you guys might want to be a little more careful about where you have those kinds of conversations.” Holden appears from the darkness, stepping out of the trees, and into the moonlight, revealing the smile on his face.

And the gun in his hand.