CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Chase

I left Madison sound asleep in bed again. She wasn't used to the early mornings, which was fine. This was my time to think and reflect. I loved the brisk mornings when it was still dark and everything in the forest was perfectly still. It was a great time to think about life, which was exactly what I had been doing.

I was thinking about my life and Madison. I liked her. More than I wanted to. I knew it didn't seem logical, but I felt myself falling for her. She was a beautiful woman. I wanted her to stay in Colorado. I could have a studio built for her to work in. She didn't need to go back to Florida. I could take care of her.

I trekked back and forth from the woodshed to the porch, carrying armloads of firewood. I didn't want to go back to being all alone. It startled me a bit to realize that, but it was the truth. Having Madison around had been nice. I loved being able to talk to her, share things with her and hang out. It did tend to get a bit lonely up here.

Once I stacked enough wood to get us through for a bit, I stomped off my boots and headed back inside. I would make her breakfast, again. I needed to show her how great it was living here. Today, I would work on convincing her to stay.

When I walked in, I saw her perfect butt high up in the air. She was on her knees, bent over and digging through a bottom drawer in the kitchen. It was the drawer I put bills and other paperwork.

“Are you looking for anything in particular?” I asked in a deep voice.

She nearly jumped three feet in the air. She spun around, shock and guilt on her face.

“You scared me,” she said, smiling but not a real smile. It was one of guilt.

“What are you doing?” I asked, stepping out of my boots and walking toward her.

At first, she looked intimidated, but then, she put her shoulders back and leveled her gaze at me, “I want to know what you're hiding from me.”

I rolled my eyes. “What makes you think I'm hiding anything from you?”

“I know you are. There's something you aren't telling me. I'm not stupid. I'm pretty good at reading people, and I know you’re holding something back. What is this big secret you have that you don't want me to find out about?”

I stood in front of her. “I am who and what I say I am. I don't know what more you’re expecting me to say.”

She shook her head. “Just tell me the truth. Do you think so little of me that you have to keep lying to me?”

“Madison, I'm not lying. It's in your head. You're being paranoid,” I told her, putting my hands on her shoulders. “What can I do to convince you?”

She stared back at me for several long seconds. I felt as if I was in front of a jury, waiting to hear my guilty or innocent verdict—again.

“Fine. I'm sorry. That was really rude of me. I have no business digging through your stuff,” she said, looking down at her bare feet.

“It's fine. I understand not trusting people. I like you, Madison. I want you to trust me.”

She looked up and smiled. “I like you, which is why I want you to know you can tell me anything.”

I sighed. “Really?”

She giggled. “Okay, okay, fine. I won't say another word.”

“Good. Do you want some breakfast?”

“I'm good with some toast. I don't need bacon and eggs every day. I probably shouldn't have bacon every day,” she joked.

“Okay, toast it is. Coffee is on the stove,” I pointed out.

She grabbed a cup, and I opened the cupboard to grab the bread. I breathed a sigh of relief. I had dodged another bullet, but it was only a matter of time. She was going to find out now. I knew I was making it worse by continuing to tell her there was nothing. I didn't know what else to do. I couldn't tell her everything, not yet. I needed to convince her I was a good guy who cared for her and would never hurt her.

I made her toast, and we sat together, drinking our coffee and eating.

“I need to run into town. I have a few errands to run. Did you want to go?” I asked her, secretly hoping she would say no. I wanted to talk to Jayden. He had a way of helping me work through things, even if we didn't always agree on the solution to my many problems.

“Actually, if you don't mind, can I kind of hang out here?”

“Of course,” I said a little too quickly, causing her to look at me with a questioning look on her face. “I mean, this is your vacation. I want you to sit back and relax. Take a walk around the cabin, but don't go into the forest until I get back. I wouldn't want you getting lost out there.”

She smiled. “I had no intention of going out there. I was thinking of reading the book I brought with me. I haven't had time to sit and read in ages. Maybe I'll take a hot bath. Just do nothing.”

The thought of her in a bubble bath created all kinds of erotic images in my head.

She giggled. “Now, now. The bath is me—alone. Just a bath, big boy.”

I laughed. “Let me have my fantasy.”

“Oh, you can have any fantasy you like. How long do you think you'll be gone?”

I shrugged. “Maybe two hours or so.”

“Perfect,” she grinned, showing off a flawless smile.

“Do you want me to pick up anything for you? Bubble bath?” I said waggling my eyebrows.

“I have bubble bath but maybe pick some more up. You never know when we may get dirty and need to bathe.”

I groaned. “You're killing me. I better get going, or I'm never going to leave.”

I leaned down and kissed her before throwing a flannel on and a pair of boots. I liked that she was comfortable alone in my house. I wanted her to feel comfortable like she was welcome and belonged.

I went to Jayden's house and found him rolling out of bed for the day.

“Damn, you look rough,” I said when he opened the door.

He blinked a few times, looking at me before rubbing his bare chest. I was glad he had at least put on a pair of sweats before he opened the door. His hair was sticking up in the back, and his eyes were puffy from lack of sleep.

“Thanks. What do you want?” he grumbled.

“Tell me you're off today and not just sleeping in.”

“I work tonight. Graveyards this week. If you didn't know I was home, why did you come here?” he shot back.

I shrugged. “Took a chance.”

“What's up? Everything cool?”

“I don't know. I think I have a very big problem on my hands. I need advice,” I admitted, which wasn't easy for me to do.

Jayden grinned. “You've come to the right guy. Sit. I need some coffee. Want anything?”

I shook my head, plopped down on his worn sofa and waited for him to return. I felt like I was on a freight train headed for a brick wall. I had to do something before this whole thing blew up in my face.

Jayden came back in. “Okay, tell me everything,” he said in a high-pitched voice. It was meant to be funny. I wasn't laughing.

“I'm falling for her. Hard,” I blurted out.

“You're just figuring that out?” he said sarcasm heavy in his tone. “The whole town knows.”

I shook my head. “No, they don't. They think she’s just some girl. This is the girl. I can feel it.”

“But you haven't told her, have you?”

I looked away, slightly embarrassed by my cowardice.

“Chase, if she finds out before you tell her and explain what happened, she’s going to dump your ass. She’s going to leave here, and she isn't going to look back,” he said with seriousness.

“I know.”

“If you know, then you better do something about it.”

“Like?”

“Tell her. She seems like a reasonable woman. It's obvious she's into you. Give her the chance to form her own opinions about you and what happened a long time ago. Don't let her Google your name and find out. I guarantee she will hit the road and leave your ass in the dust.”

“I should have changed my name,” I muttered.

“What?”

“Then she couldn't Google me or look me up. I would be a guy with no past.”

Jayden looked at me as if I had lost my mind. “That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Quit being a coward. Man up and tell her.”

I groaned. “Dammit. What a fucking mess.”

“I won't say I told you so, but hell, we all told you so. We warned you back then, you were making a huge mistake. Now, you’re going to be paying for it for the rest of your life.”

“Don't start. I'll figure it out. I can't lose her.”

He got very serious. “I hope for your sake she will understand. I like her. Mom likes her. She's good for you. Try and explain it. If she truly likes you or has fallen in love with you, she won't care. It's all in the past.”

“I hope so.”

“Where is she, anyway?” he asked as if he had just realized she wasn't here.

“At the cabin. I told her I had some errands to run.”

“Oh. Well, get your ass back there and take care of this before it gets any worse. The longer you wait to tell her, the madder she’s going to be when she finds out, and she will find out.”

“I know, I know. Thanks, man. I'll see you later,” I said, standing and heading for the door.

My mind was made up. I would go home and sit her down and explain everything the best I could. I couldn't force her to stay. That wasn’t a relationship I wanted. Not to mention, I think that was called kidnapping. Not interested in wearing an orange jumpsuit again. Never again.

As I made my way home, the nerves in my stomach increased with every mile closer I got to the cabin. I played out a million different scenarios about how I would tell her and what her possible reaction may be.

When I pulled in front of the cabin, I shut off my truck and sat inside for a few minutes, taking long, deep breaths. I could do this. If she left and vowed to never speak to me again, I would be okay. It wasn't the end of the world.

When I walked inside, it was very quiet.

“Madison?” I called out, fearing she had packed up and left while I was gone.

The bathroom door opened, and she stepped into the hall wearing a towel. Her hair was damp and piled high on her head, little strands falling around her face.

“Oh,” she gasped when she saw me. “I didn't hear you come in.”

I nodded but didn't say anything. I couldn't say anything. She was every wet dream come to life, standing right there in front of me, slick with moisture and naked.

God help me. I would tell her later. Right now, there were more pressing matters to attend to.