Chapter Fifteen
“I’m fine, Haddie. No need for the salve,” Lucy assured her.
Haddie helped Lucy into her nightgown. The tender skin on her thighs was red and angry-looking, but thankfully, she was not burned.
“Will you bring me some willow bark tea?”
“Aye, miss.”
After Haddie left the room, she wandered to the window, restless. When Alex had helped her from the dining room, she’d been furious and in so much pain, she hadn’t had it in her to be the least bit tender toward him, whereas he had been nothing but attentive toward her. The moon was out, affording her a magical view of the front garden. Everything looked different in moonlight. As if fairies had cast a blue dust on all the flowers.
Alex stood in the garden among the daisies, looking downcast. Feeling a pang of regret, she put her hand to the windowpane. She was about to open the latch and call to him when another figure stepped out of the house and into the garden. Icy fingers skittered up her spine. Lucy stood transfixed as she watched Alex take the horrible Elizabeth into his arms and hold her. Then he kissed her. Oh, God, he kissed her. The two lovers looked up at her window…and laughed. Lucy clapped a hand over her mouth and backed away from the window.
Haddie stepped into the room. “Miss? Are you all right?”
She staggered forward and grabbed the bedpost to keep from crumpling to the floor. “I’m not feeling well.” She shut her eyes tight. The scene in the garden exploded into sharp fragmented images. They stabbed at her brain and melted into red and yellow spots behind her eyelids.
She was only vaguely aware of Haddie helping her into bed.
“Drink the tea. It’ll help you sleep.” Haddie tucked the bedclothes tight around Lucy. “I’ll leave the lamp burning and check on you in an hour.”
There was a sharp knock on her door. Lucy’s eyes flew open wide.
“Lucy. It’s Alex. May I come in?”
She shook her head violently. Haddie nodded her understanding and went to the door. As she exited, the maid said, “Wheesht. You’ll wake her. She’s sleeping now.”
“Is she hurt bad, Haddie?” he asked.
“No, but it pains her. Best let her sleep.”
Lucy heard them walk away. A few seconds later, though, Alex scratched at the door joining their rooms.
“Lucy. I ken you’re no’ asleep. Will you talk to me, please? It’s not what you think.”
She shut her eyes and covered her ears. No more lies. She didn’t want to hear any more lies from Alex. His betrayal cut her to the bone. The truth crystallized in her mind so suddenly it made her ill. She was living a nightmare, surrounded by people who did nothing but lie to her. Alex didn’t want her. His father John had arranged this marriage with her father for financial gain. His mother Flora was probably just being nice to her to make her think she was welcome here. What would things be like after she married him? Would his true nature surface? Would they all turn against her? Was Balforss to be her prison?
An even more horrifying thought came to her. What if, once the marriage was complete, Alex planned to do away with her so he could be with Elizabeth? No. No, Alex would never do something like that. Or would he? There were the men he’d cut down, slaughtered savagely, without a second thought.
Her frightened mind jumped from one paralyzing conclusion to another. What if those men who attacked them on the way here had been Langley’s men trying to rescue her? She had helped kill one of them. How could she have been so gullible? She had to stop crying and think.
Hercules, always able to sense her distress, whined for attention. She hugged him close and whispered to him. “We can’t marry Alex, mon cher. We have to leave this place.” But how?
Langley.
Was it too late? Was he still nearby, hoping to see her? In his letter, he said he was staying with the Lady Sutherland. Somehow, she had to get a message to Langley or convince someone to take her to him. Langley would save her.
Her head swam with visions of Alex kissing Elizabeth. The two of them making love under her nose while laughing at her. When she fell asleep, she dreamed fitfully. Nightmares of men trying to kill her brought her to consciousness. When she lapsed into sleep again, she dreamed of Alex placing a smothering kiss on her face, and she woke covered in perspiration.
My God. I nearly let Alex ruin me.
Sometime during the night, Haddie had come into her room and extinguished the lamp.
Haddie is good. Haddie will help me escape in the morning.
…
Well after midnight, Alex lay on his bed still dressed. He couldn’t sleep. Wouldn’t sleep. Not until he got Lucy to listen to him and understand. Growing angrier by the minute, he launched himself out of bed, reached for the handle on the door adjoining their rooms, and stopped. She was still upset. He knocked instead.
“Lucy,” he called. “Talk to me.” Nothing. He went into the hall and rapped on her door. “Lucy, please. I’ll knock this door down if you dinnae open it now.”
“Alex?” His mother called to him from the opposite end of the corridor. “What’s the matter? Is Lucy all right?”
“Nothing, Ma. Go back to bed.” He was in such an agitated state he couldn’t disguise the anger in his voice.
His reply had been far too short for his mother’s liking. She marched down the hall toward him, tying her robe around her as she went. He could tell by the sound of her footsteps she was boiling mad. Barely speaking above a whisper, she said, “I will not have you creating a fuss in the middle of the night. Go to bed and leave Lucy be. You can resolve whatever is troubling you tomorrow.”
Thoroughly disgusted with himself and his miserable situation, he stomped past his mother and barreled down the staircase. If he couldn’t settle things with Lucy tonight, he’d find relief in a bottle. He flung open the library door, strode to the cabinet, and poured himself a long shot of his father’s best whisky, then tossed it back. He nearly spit the whole mouthful out when he heard an unseen individual speak.
“Something bothering you, brother?”
A head popped out from behind the wingback chair.
“Ian.”
Alex embraced him, pounded him on the back several times, and then shook him by the shoulders. His troubles evaporated in an instant, replaced with pure joy at seeing his brother. It had been nearly a year since he’d been home last. He stepped back to get a better look. Ian was dressed in full uniform, dust covered and road weary, but looked as happy as Alex felt.
“When did you get here?”
“Just the now. Someone is sleeping in my room. I didnae want to wake Ma, so I thought I’d sleep down here and surprise her in the morning.” Ian pointed to the whisky bottle. “May I join you?”
Alex retrieved another glass and poured them both a tot. They settled down at the card table.
“I’m glad to see you, man,” Alex said. “Slainte.”
“I wouldnae miss my big brother’s wedding.”
His smile faded. “If there is a wedding.” He took another swallow of the golden liquid. It was helping, but he wouldn’t sleep until he was dead drunk.
“Sounds serious,” Ian said. “Is something amiss?”
“Aye. Lucy willnae speak to me.”
“Why?”
“She saw me kiss Elizabeth.”
“Christ, man.” Ian bolted to his feet. “Have you lost your bloody mind? Days before your wedding and you’re kissing Elizabeth?” He paced around the library, sending looks of disgust Alex’s way.
“She kissed me.” Alex protested.
“I fail to see the difference.”
He proceeded to tell Ian everything, starting with his first embarrassing blunder on the road from Inverness to Balforss.
“You did what?” Ian asked, dumbfounded by Alex’s stupidity.
“I revealed myself to her before we got home,” he said, again on the defensive.
“And she forgave you?”
“Aye.” He continued to tell him about their subsequent misunderstandings regarding the love letter and offering to call off the wedding. Ian shook his head in disbelief.
“Things were going well for a while. She was responsive, ye ken?” Alex said, seeking understanding from his younger brother.
“Aye. I ken well enough.”
“Lucy liked me. She wanted to marry me. Until Cousin Diana and Sir Ranald arrived.” When he got to the part about Elizabeth injuring Lucy, then tricking him into kissing her, Ian covered his face.
“I need more whisky,” Ian said, holding out his glass. “I dinnae ken how you will dig your way out of this. You’ve done some serious damage.”
“What should I do?”
Ian shook his head. “Be prepared to spend tomorrow on your knees, brother.”
Alex folded his arms on the table and laid his head down.
“You say she’s handy with a bow?”
“Aye,” Alex said, his voice sounding muffled with his head buried in his arms.
Ian patted his brother on the back. “Dinnae fash. I have an idea that just might work.”
…
The pleasant morning sounds of Balforss coming to life teased Lucy awake. She stretched. Then memories of last night’s terrible revelations descended upon her, pinning her body to the bed as if she were staked to the ground. Unable to move, unable to open her eyes, or lift her head from the pillow. How could she? How could she face the sunlight, much less the faces of those people who had betrayed her? Elizabeth, Liam, John, Flora. Was everyone in league with Alex?
Haddie slipped noiselessly into her bedchamber. “How are you this morning, miss?” Hercules danced on his hind legs and pestered Haddie to take him outside.
Was Haddie a part of Alex’s deception? No. Haddie was far too guileless.
“Perfectly fine, thank you,” Lucy said. “No damage done.”
She managed to drag her body from the bed and stagger to the washbasin. As she performed her morning ablutions, Lucy considered the risk involved in asking her maid for help. She wanted desperately to get away from Balforss—today, if possible. Asking Laird John outright to be returned home would tip her hand. If they had planned to force the union and imprison her here as she suspected, she might lose her only opportunity to escape.
The young woman fastened the back of the grey serge gown Lucy used for everyday.
She probed her maid with caution. “I think of you as a friend, Haddie. I feel as though I could count on you if I were in trouble or needed help.”
Haddie examined her face with an intensity that made her uncomfortable. “I would surely help you whenever I could. Is ought amiss?”
“No. Of course not. Not exactly.” She was about to broach the subject of escape, when Hercules became adamant about his personal needs.
Haddie smiled down at the dog and her face transformed, the plain girl becoming appealing. “I’ll see to him, miss.” She swept Hercules up off the rug and trudged out of the room.
Lucy surveyed the bedchamber, once a happy place, now a room full of sadness. If she were leaving today, she would need to pack her things. She wouldn’t be able to take everything. Maybe one gown, her jewelry, and her night rail. She would have to leave her bow and arrows behind. Lucy would regret their loss more than her gowns.
She gathered the things she would take and stuffed them into a small satchel. Perhaps she could pilfer a few food items from the kitchen this morning for the trip. Thank goodness she had coin of her own. Enough to pay for lodging and passage to London.
There was a knock on her bedroom door. She quickly hid the satchel under her bed. “Who is it?”
“It’s Flora, dear. Are you well enough to come down for breakfast? There’s someone I want you to meet.”
“I’ll be down soon. I want to check on Peter first.” Lucy put her ear to the door. Certain no one was in the corridor, she slipped out and down the hall to Peter’s room.
“Morning, miss,” Peter said, getting up from his breakfast. He bowed dutifully and pulled out a chair for Lucy to join him.
“My, you are turning into a real gentleman.”
“Thank you, miss. I’m feeling much better today. I’ve no fever and the swelling in my neck has gone down. I’m not feeling gun-tay-shus at all.”
“You mean contagious?”
Peter nodded solemnly.
The boy was so earnest. She hadn’t realized until now she had grown fond of him. “I’m relieved to hear it.”
“I ken mayhap I should go back to the stable today. The horses’ll be missing me sorely, and with the wedding and all, I wouldnae want to leave Mr. Alex shorthanded. Miss? Miss? Why do you cry, Miss Lucy? Have I said something wrong? Did I forget my manners?”
She scrubbed away tears and said, “No, sweetheart. You didn’t do anything wrong.” Lucy held out her arms. Peter stepped into her embrace and allowed her to hold him. It felt like holding a bird. His rigid little body relaxed after a moment. He patted her gently on the back.
“Dinnae feel sad, Miss Lucy. Everything will be fine. Mr. Alex will make everything fine,” he said with absolute certainty.
She released him and gathered herself. “Yes. You’re right, of course.” If only Peter were right. If only Alex could make last night disappear, never happen. But that was the furthest thing from reality.
Liam Ulbster appeared at the door to Peter’s room. He was one of the last people she wanted to see this morning, third only to Alex and Elizabeth.
“Excuse me, Lucy. I have something for you.” He held out a folded piece of parchment with a red seal. Lucy’s stomach flipped. She rose and took the proffered missive from Liam. It bore the emblem of the fox—Langley’s seal.
“Where did you get this?”
“Read it.”
Lucy cracked the seal and unfolded the parchment. Excitement and fear battled with each beat of her heart.
Dearest Lucy,
The bearer of this message is my agent. You may trust this person. If you still hold fond feelings for me, as I fervently hope you do, I beg you fly to me on love’s wings. I will never know true happiness without you.
Yours, Langley
She refolded the letter, hands trembling. “Excuse me for a moment, Peter.” Lucy stepped into the corridor and closed Peter’s door. “I ask you again, where did you get this?”
“Langley is a dear friend,” Liam said. “He begged me to bring this to you. I will be leaving Balforss this morning. If you are inclined to join me, I will deliver you to him.”
She eyed Liam with suspicion. Something told her not to trust this man.
“It’s your choice. You can go through with this ridiculous marriage, or you can come with me.” When she didn’t reply, he continued, “I will be leaving in an hour. I’ll wait for you in my carriage about a mile down the lane. If you aren’t there by ten o’clock, I’ll leave without you. As a precaution, I suggest you tell no one.” He walked away without looking back.
She tucked Langley’s letter in the pocket of her gown and peeked inside Peter’s door. “I’m going down for breakfast, sweetheart. I’ll come back later, and we can talk about you returning to the stable tomorrow.”
Upon entering the dining room, Lucy noticed a new face at the breakfast table. John and Flora were seated in their usual places. Elizabeth was conspicuously absent as were Sir Ranald and Lady Diana. Apparently, they were late sleepers. Alex spotted Lucy and stood. The remainder of the men rose automatically.
“Lucy, are you well?” Alex asked.
As always, her body responded to the soft rumble of his voice. She turned away, afraid that if she looked into his eyes she might lose her resolve. “I’m fine.”
“This is my brother, Ian.”
“How do you do?” She bobbed a curtsy without really seeing the man’s face. He, in turn, made a suitable bow but did not reply. She sat as far away from Alex as possible, taking a seat to Flora’s left. Lucy pushed eggs and sausage around on her plate while pretending to listen to Flora babble about how glad she was Ian could be here for the wedding.
After an acceptable amount of time, she quietly excused herself from the table. Unfortunately, her departure was punctuated by all the men rising to their feet. It seemed perverse to her that they chose now to demonstrate such impeccable manners.
Lucy’s body moved, making all the necessary arrangements to leave Balforss, yet her mind resisted. She shouldn’t trust Liam. He was a despicable person. On the other hand, he would transport her away from this nightmare, away from Alex into the arms of Langley. What did it matter how she reached Langley? All that mattered was that she leave Balforss today.
She begged a few food items from Mrs. Swenson, making up a story about a pretend picnic with Peter in his room. On her way back, Alex accosted her. She clutched her bundle of food to her chest.
“Lucy. I’m stalking red deer today.” Alex spoke in the soothing tone he used for his horse. Blast him. “Will you come with me and bring your bow? I ken you would be most helpful on the hunt.”
She almost laughed in his face. Lucy had longed to go on a hunt for years. Now, at the very moment of her departure from Balforss, the man she hoped never to lay eyes on again offered her the one and probably only chance to participate in a hunt.
Merde.
Thoughts sparked around her brain like flashes of lightning. She needed to get to her room, gather her things, and get away from the house as soon as possible. If she refused his offer, Alex would follow her around all day.
“Yes,” she said flatly. “I would be glad to go hunting with you.”
Alex’s handsome face broke into a heart-stopping smile.
She looked away, unable to bear his false kindness. “I have to change into my hunting costume and collect my bow. I’ll meet you at the stable in an hour.” Lucy made a move to leave, but Alex gathered her up by the waist.
“I want you and no other,” he said.
She cast her eyes downward. She would not allow herself to be tricked by this monster again.
“Do you hear me, Lucy?”
“Yes,” she said. Alex kissed her with lips soft, insistent, crushing her to his chest. She felt the same stirring she always did when he held her. How could Alex kiss her so passionately when he desired another? Lucy gathered her wits and pushed him away.
As she hurried toward the house, he called to her. “I will find a way back to you, Lucy.”
She focused her mind on her objective rather than the dull ache in her chest, willing her body to keep from rattling apart. When she reached her bedroom, she locked the door and collapsed on the bed. Her darling Hercules scrambled across the bedclothes and licked her face.
“Am I doing the right thing, Hercules?”
The dog put his head down between his paws and looked at her with soulful eyes.
“Come on, my little man. No time to lose.”
She struggled out of her grey serge and donned her hunting costume. Fortunately, it was possible to dress herself without assistance—a white blouse, a brown velvet jacket cut very much like a man’s style, and a black wool skirt full enough to ride. She completed the ensemble with a well-tied cravat, light brown kid gloves, and a small, black beaver hat.
A fortuitous twist that Alex should invite her on a hunt. Not only did it give her the time away from him she needed for her escape, but the hunting costume would also be better for travel, and no one would question why she was carrying her bow case and satchel full of lunch. Clever, and yet, so tragic.
“Come, Hercules. We’re leaving now.”
…
Alex leaned against the paddock fence, chewing the sweet end of a blade of grass. Last night he thought Lucy might never forgive him. This morning he had hope. She had agreed to go hunting with him—Ian’s idea.
Whether they brought anything home or not, he would be alone with her. Away from the witch, Elizabeth, and her foppish stepbrother, Liam. He would have Lucy to himself for hours. She couldn’t stay mad at him forever. Alone with her, he could explain what had really happened. Then he would apologize, she would see reason, and forgive him.
“Alex,” Ian called. “How is it this morning?” His brother approached the stable with Declan and Magnus trailing behind. Alex met him half way. Embracing forearms, Ian said, “You look like a man who’s just been saved from hanging.”
“Thanks for the idea. She’s going hunting with me. I’m waiting for Lucy now.”
“I heard what happened,” Declan said. “You sure you want to be alone with the lass? She’s deadly with the bow.”
“If he comes home gutted and tied to the saddle, we’ll know who did him in.” Magnus laughed and congratulated himself on such a fine jest.
Ian moved to inspect one of the horses Alex had saddled for the hunt. “What have we here? He’s a new one.”
“He’s my wedding gift to Lucy.” Alex slapped the white thoroughbred on the neck. “She’s afraid of horses. I chose the gelding for his even temper. I ken they will get on fine. I was going to give him to her on our wedding day, but I thought maybe today would be better, aye?”
“He’s a beauty to be sure. What’s his name?” Ian asked.
“He came with the name Atepomarus, but I renamed him Apollo for Lucy.”
“How long you been waiting for her?” Magnus asked.
Alex glanced at the sun. Lucy should have returned by now. In fact, she was very late. Had she lost track of time? “She must be detained with Peter or Ma. I’ll fetch her. Will you wait with the horses, Ian?”
She was nowhere to be found. Not in her room, Peter’s room, the library, his mother’s parlor, the dining room, the kitchen, or the candle shed. Alex scratched his head. Lucy had said she would go hunting with him. He was sure he had understood her clearly. He returned to the stable, but Ian hadn’t seen her. Alex retraced his steps, checking every room a second time, concern plucking at the edges of his thoughts.
“Haddie, have you seen Miss Lucy?”
“Not since this morning when I helped her dress.”
He stopped his mother on the staircase. “Have you seen Lucy?”
“Not since breakfast.”
“If you see her, tell her I’m looking for her.”
He trotted down the hall to Peter’s room once again, this time venturing a few steps inside. “Peter, have you seen Miss Lucy?”
“Aye. She said I may go back to the stable tomorrow.”
“When was the last time you saw her?”
Peter looked up as if he might find the answer somewhere on the ceiling. “I ken it was a couple hours ago. Maybe longer.”
“Did she say where she was going when she left?”
“Oh, aye. She went to breakfast. Said she’d be back after, but she never came.”
Alex pinched the bridge of his nose. This search had scrambled his thoughts and made his head hurt. Lucy’s trail kept circling back to where he started.
“Miss Lucy was sad,” Peter said. “But then the man came to the door and gave her something.”
Alarm jolted Alex back to clarity. “What man?”
“I dinnae ken. I never seen him a’fore.”
He forgot Lucy’s ban on Peter’s company and went to the boy’s bedside. “What did the man look like?”
Peter’s description sounded suspiciously like Liam.
“What was it he gave Miss Lucy?”
“I didnae see, but I ken whatever he gave her made Miss Lucy feel better.”
Alex tore down the stairs, looking for his mother. He found her in the kitchen with Mrs. Swenson.
“Where the devil is Liam?” he shouted.
His mother gave him a tongue lashing for using bad language before she finally explained that Elizabeth felt unwell.
“She and Liam left for Ulbster before breakfast,” Flora reported. “I saw them off. It was only the two of them in the carriage.”
That was a bit of good news. Lucy hadn’t left with sodding Liam. He didn’t imagine she would. He certainly didn’t think she’d climb into a carriage with Elizabeth. That would be like dropping two angry cats into a bucket of water.
Alex initiated a proper search for Lucy, enlisting the entire Balforss household. Declan, Magnus, and Ian spread out to cover the grounds around the house in case she’d gone for a walk with Hercules and the dog got away or she’d twisted an ankle. Alex ran down the path toward the duck pond. An Ophelia-like vision of her floating in the water appeared in his head. “Please, please let her be safe.” He was relieved to find the pond empty. But where in God’s creation is Lucy?
The men met in front of the house an hour later. It was now half two in the afternoon. The last time anyone had laid eyes on Lucy was approximately five hours ago. Alex forcibly tamped down the panic rising in his chest.
“It’s apparent one of two things has happened to her,” Alex said. “She’s either run away, or someone has taken her.”
“Her dog’s gone,” Magnus said.
He let the meaning of Magnus’s words sink in. If someone had taken her, they wouldn’t have bothered with the bloody dog. Lucy had left voluntarily.
Haddie ran out of the house, waving something in the air. “Mr. Alex. I found this. It was in the pocket of her grey gown, the one she was wearing this morning.”
He unfolded a parchment with a broken red seal and read.
“I’m going to kill him!”