chapter four
Noah watched as Lucia moved to the base of the clock tower and leaned against it. He never should have brought her here. This was bringing up bad memories, obviously, since she was already crying. He moved closer, intending to pull her away when she suddenly smiled.
This was the first time Noah had seen Lucia smile in ages. Her real smile, not the strained version she’d had pasted on for the last week. What the hell was going on?
"You okay, sweetheart?"
She grinned up at him. "I'm perfect. Thank you for bringing me up here. I missed this. Missed that sense of home."
She shivered a little. The hot and sticky July had given way to an even hotter and stickier August for the most part. But from up here, the breeze coming in from over the ocean hit them just right, making it much cooler up here at the clock tower.
Lucia wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love you, Noah."
Automatically, his arms wrapped around her, holding her in the shelter of his embrace. Jesus, he'd missed this. He’d missed her. Her smile, her laugh and even her shouting. "I love you too."
She rose on her tiptoes to press a soft kiss against his lips. But this was different from the brief, chaste kisses she'd been giving him for the last week or so. This kiss lingered. Just like in the car, he was taken off guard. Noah wanted her so badly, but he didn’t want to push her too fast or pressure her. He needed to let her drive.
Waiting to see what it was that she needed, he kissed her gently, letting her take the lead. It went against every fiber in his body to do so, but he could do it. Do it for her.
She pulled back with a frown. "Noah, why aren't you kissing me?"
"I thought that's what we were just doing, princess."
She shook her head. "No, that's not how you kiss me. When you kiss me, it drowns everything out. And all I can think about is you, and me, and us, and getting naked as quickly as possible."
Oh, yeah; real helpful. She just had to go and say the naked word. One word from her and his dick was ready to play. The blood rushed to his cock like the damn thing was on fire.
"Sweetheart, you've been through a lot. So maybe we should take it slow?"
Lucia gave him a coquettish smile that told him she knew exactly what she was doing to him. "And if I don't want to take it slow?"
Noah licked his lips. What was she playing at? What the hell was going on with her? At the same time, all he wanted to do was nuzzle her, inhale her scent, and see if he could get her to make that sound at the back of her throat that she always did when she was about to come. He was desperate to hear it again. But he knew something was off.
"Sweetheart, you know how much I love you. And you know how much I miss you." Lucia pressed against him and they both moaned. "You can feel how much I've missed you. But I want to make sure you're doing okay before we move forward. I don't want you to retreat from me again. It scared the shit out of me."
"I'm not retreating. I just know what I want. I've missed you. Everything was a shock and I didn't know how to deal, but now I’ve sorted it all out. Coming here, coming home in essence, it's making me better. I just want you to help me feel better. Feel more alive, more like myself." She rocked her hips slightly, and Noah swore he saw stars.
"Lucia —"
She nuzzled into his throat, her lips softly teasing and playing over his Adam's apple. "Noah—" she mimicked his tone.
"Sweetheart, this is not the best —"
She cut him off effectively by delving her hand into his jeans and wrapping her delicate hand around his erection.
Oh shit. It was as if all higher brain processing had been turned off, all functioning ceased. Lucia snapped open the top button of his jeans, and the zick-zick-zick as the zipper went down only ratcheted his arousal even higher. She had him out of the confines of his jeans and boxers in seconds.
"Lucia. This isn't a good idea. Anyone could see us up here."
"So what if anyone sees us? I need the man I love inside of me right now. I don't want to wait. I don't want to go back home. I want to enjoy the view. I want to dig my nails into your back as you slide into me. I want to feel alive, Noah. Help me feel alive."
Her words tore through him. He knew what he should do. He knew what would probably be better for her. The problem was, that knowledge was somewhere way in the recesses of his mind. Because, well, he was a guy, and she had her hand on his dick. So that meant he didn't have two brain cells to rub together at the moment, let alone the cognitive willpower to stop this.
"Sweetheart. I love the way you do that."
Fuck, did he love it. Her hands were so soft and warm. And they certainly felt better than him making good use of his right hand in the shower every morning. But he had to at least try to be the reasonable one.
"Let's at least go back—"
She squeezed him and his knees buckled. "I told you, I don't want to go to the car. I'm ready here. I'm wet, Noah. You want to feel how much?"
All thinking stopped. All he knew at that moment was he needed to be inside her. Needed to feel her warmth and her slick heat as she wrapped around his dick, squeezing, pulsing, and milking him. Her dress rode up. And his hands slid up her knees, widening her thighs the farther he went. With his thumbs, he traced the edge of her panties, and Lucia threw her head back.
"Oh God, Noah."
Hearing her moaning his name, all low and sultry like that, made him jerk. The only thoughts his brain offered were, Inside. Now. Need. Yeah, full sentences were so not his thing at the moment. She was wet. So fucking wet. Both thumbs snuck past the edge of her panties, one went straight to her clit, gently smoothing over it, as he dipped his head and took her mouth. As he kissed her deep, licking into the warmth between her lips, his other thumb found her wet center and slid in easily. She rocked her hips into his hands, questing, searching.
God, he needed this. They needed this. Maybe they could find their way back to each other if he could just wrap himself around her, hold her tight and keep her safe. And keep her loved. If he kept her loved, they'd both be able to stop worrying.
Lucia was impatient. With her hands, she shoved at his jeans, pushing them down over his hips and his ass.
With a curse, Noah drew back, hooked his whole hand into her soaking panties, and tugged. The ripping sound barely registered as it mixed with the sound of her panting and his groan. In seconds, his cock was nudging her slick entrance. He held the base tightly and gently rubbed against her. Covered himself with her slick juices. Shit. So fucking good. She was so wet. So ready.
"Noah. Please. I need—"
She didn't have to ask twice. He slammed home.
Lucia tossed her head back, exposing her throat. He leaned over to brush his lips along the column of her neck and sucked gently. Even as one hand scooped under her ass to keep her stationary as he made love to her, the cold of the unyielding stone against his arms made him flinch but he didn't care. All he wanted was to drive home. To keep feeling her slick heat tightening around him. Fuck, how had he lasted for more than a few hours, let alone days without this?
Lucia shoved her hands in his hair and held him to her. With a frustrated groan, she yanked at her clothes, struggling to tug down the strap of her sundress.
Against her neck he whispered, "You want my mouth on you? You want me to suck your nipples?"
"Yes, Noah. God, yes."
He shifted her up and back until her head and shoulders were just off of the stone platform, giving him the angle he needed to dip his head and take her into his mouth. The moment he did, she moaned low and her inner walls tightened around him. He switched to her other breast, sucking her through the thin material and fabric, while his thumb teased her other nipple, pinching lightly. All the while, he drove deep, claiming her once again as his. His cock sliding and retreating, sliding and retreating. Every time he bottomed out, she made this low keening sound at the back of her throat like she'd just discovered bliss.
And then he felt it. Her hands tightened in his hair, and she held him to her breasts as she screamed out, "Oh, my God, Noah. Yes, right there. Right there. Right—" Her climax crashed into her, and her whole body locked around his like a vise. She was never letting him go.
"Oh shit. Fuuuck, Lucia." With three quick jerks, he was following her. Their climaxes mingled so that he couldn't tell where one of them ended and the other one began. Exactly the way it should be.
"I love you," he whispered.
"And I love you, Noah Blake."
An hour later, Lucia stood in the shower and let the hot spray pelt her skin. Had they really just done that? The blush on her cheeks mingled with the hot water.
Public sex.
She'd never done anything like that in her life and as reckless as it had been, she couldn’t bring herself to regret any of it. She could still feel Noah's hands gripping her hips. The bruising sting of his kiss. He’d been completely out of control, and she’d loved every minute of it.
She'd certainly taken him off guard. Truthfully, she had taken herself off guard. But considering what she’d seen that day, a little uncharacteristic behavior was to be expected. It had been such a shock to see those sunflower seeds there. Despite what she’d told JJ, she hadn’t actually thought she’d find any evidence of Rafe just by haunting the places they’d used to go. But this was something she couldn’t ignore. Anyone else would think she was insane, but she just knew how those seeds had gotten there. And they’d looked fresh. He'd been there. Recently. Rafe was alive.
Or you're crazy.
She let the thought slide over her, turning it over in her head. Maybe she was crazy. Maybe she was seeing things that weren't there. Her behavior up in that clock tower was reckless at best. Everything she’d done lately was reckless and out of character. The only thing her digging had accomplished so far was to get her nearly killed, more than once. Not to mention the danger all of her friends were in because of her. Matthias, Jonas, and Oskar were going to be suffering for weeks because of her. All of this was because she was asking questions ... about Rafe.
She didn’t want to think she was losing it. She'd heard his voice. But you didn't see his face. No, she hadn't. But it was possible.
The memories had been coming back a little more every day. She remembered so much more about what had happened before the gunshot that changed everything. When Rafe had gone around the back of the car, he’d taken his shirt off and put on something else, then put the shirt back on. Was it possible that he’d been putting on a bulletproof vest? There was no way to know for sure, but the fact that it was possible was just one more puzzle piece in a jumble of others that she had to make sense of. But no matter how she spun things, it was possible that he was alive.
But, if he was alive, then what was he doing? Why was he trying to hurt her?
He hasn't actually tried to kill you.
Maybe they had been looking at everything the wrong way. Had he just been trying to take her? Why? And where the hell had he been all this time? She leaned against the wall and tried to drown out the doubt and worry.
Noah knocked on the bathroom door. "Hey, princess? You locked the door. How am I supposed to join you if you lock me out?"
Lucia knew full well if he wanted in, he'd just take the damn door off the hinges. But he was giving her some semblance of privacy. "Sorry, I just needed a few."
And man did she. Her shoulders, her hips, and her ass were all abraded thanks to that stone platform Noah had put her on to screw her senseless. No, that wasn't his fault; that was yours. She’d just been so happy to find those sunflower seeds. So happy to know that maybe she wasn't crazy, she’d wanted to celebrate. She’d wanted to feel Noah.
“You can come in,” she called out.
“Okay, give me a minute. I’m just going to check in with Jonas so we won’t be interrupted.”
Lucia smiled at that. She figured he was trying to make her laugh by mentioning the other guys’ tendency to interrupt or walk in on them accidently.
He was trying so hard, but no matter what she did she couldn't claw herself out from the darkness. She just kept hearing Rafe's voice over and over again. All these years later, clear as day. Calling her Lulu. And of course every time she looked at Noah, she saw Rafe. So that made things worse.
But now, now that he might be alive? She needed to find out. Where he'd been, what he had been doing, why he left her, left Nonna. It wasn’t going to solve everything, but at least if she could get some proof she wouldn’t have to see that look on everyone’s faces. The look that said they thought she was losing her mind but were too polite to mention it. Maybe they all thought this was just an overdue breakdown that she should have had right after her brother’s death.
The only person who was fully in her corner was half-crazy herself. JJ was always ready to run in like a crusader. Maybe in this instance that made JJ a little off her rocker.
But what if you're right? What if it was Rafe? That was the thought that dragged her out of the darkness. If her brother was alive, she was going to find him. Even if she knew everyone else would think it was crazy.
The slap of cold air on her backside brought her out of her thoughts. She hadn’t even heard Noah unlock the door.
“Is everything okay? You’ve been in here for a while.” He picked up the loofah sponge that she’d been using and dragged it gently over her arms and then down her back.
Lucia smiled up at him. “Just thinking about everything. Plus the hot water was helping soothe all the muscles I strained while having sex against a brick tower. Remind me not to do that again.”
Noah’s hands followed the path of the sponge. The gentle touch sent shivers up and down her spine. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the sensation of being warm and naked with him.
“I would point out that I tried to be responsible and stop things. But I was forced by a saucy vixen to do dirty things in public against my better judgment.”
Lucia raised an eyebrow. “Against your will, huh?”
“Well, you were saying dirty things like I need you inside me, Noah and I’m so wet for you, Noah. What red-blooded man could resist that? There is no willpower in the world that could withstand that kind of sorcery.”
She chuckled at his disgruntled expression. “Does that mean you don’t want me to use my witchy powers on you again? Because I could leave you to shower alone. But that would be a shame because I really wanted to taste this.”
He sucked in a hard breath when her hands circled him, tugging on his hard length and playing with the soft skin of the head.
“Oh, you should definitely do what you want to do. I’m already under your spell after all. What’s one more thing?”
Lucia nodded her head slowly and then sank to her knees before him. His eyes got dark as he watched her greedily. She took him in her mouth, happy to lose herself in bringing pleasure to her man instead of worrying about things she couldn’t control.