Chapter 3
A few months go by, along with Thanksgiving. Ever since that night in the bar with Matt, I continued to bury myself in work and cherish every moment I got to spend with my daughter. I got to have Embry the night before Thanksgiving and had our traditional feast. Unfortunately, my family couldn’t be here. So I decided to go to the grocery store and buy the fixings already made.
“Daddy? Can I have ‘dis?”
I look at Embry, sitting in the front of the cart and grin. Her smile brightens any day, so contagious you can’t help but do it as well. She’s holding a cookie. Where in the hell did she get that?
“I gave it to her if that’s okay.”
I look up at an older woman smiling down at Embry from behind the counter in the bakery. Her eyes move to mine and I smile. “That’s nice of you. Thank you.” She nods and I tell Embry she can have it then grab a small bag of freshly made rolls and start pushing the cart.
“Grandmudder doesn’t let me have cookies.” Grandmother. Why anyone would insist a three-year-old say Grandmother instead of calling her Nana because she couldn’t say the long word, such a big word, I’ll never know. “She said girls always have to watch their….” She presses her little index finger against her chin, looking away as if thinking. “Figure. Daddy? What’s a figure?”
I keep pushing the cart but look at her, trying to keep my anger in check. Doesn’t surprise me that Gianna’s mother would start Embry out young the way she raised Gianna to be selfish and pretentious. Well, that’s not gonna happen. I’ll do everything to make sure of it. “Something you don’t need to worry about at your age, Princess. Enjoy your cookie.” I give her a smile and my heart swells with the sound of her laughter as she devours her precious sweet.
“Oh!”
Not paying attention, I push my cart into something hard. I check to make sure Embry is okay. Her cookie crumbed face turns slightly looking behind her. “Hi.” I look beyond her to see a familiar face, only, I can’t remember from where.
“Hi, there.” The bluest eyes look up and into mine. “I’m sorry. I guess I was a bit preoccupied and didn’t see you.”
Those eyes. I’ve seen them before. “Not at all. It was my fault,” I reply to the young woman. Wherever it was, I couldn’t have forgotten how beautiful they are. Her blonde hair, slim figure, and that smile. It’s breathtaking. How could I ever not remember that?
She looks back at my daughter in concern. “Are you okay?” Embry nods and smiles. “Good.” She seems to relax. “Looks like someone had a cookie.” She laughs. It’s not a loud, obnoxious laugh, but soft and – sweet. “Was it good?”
“Oh, yes! It was so good!”
The woman laughs again and I can’t help but follow along. “Well, I guess I should….”
She begins to turn her cart away but I stop her. “Do I know you?” Her eyes lower as if thinking. “I feel as if we’ve met before or I’ve seen you somewhere?”
Those amazing blue eyes widen then soften. “Weren’t you at the Blue Pelican bar sometime back?” Now my brows lower in confusion. Was I? “I’m a waitress there. I – uh, kinda accidentally spilled the drinks on my tray on some woman in a red dress who had a major attitude.”
Now it’s my turn to laugh. That’s it! “Oh, yes. The pretentious snob who wouldn’t give me the time of day after my friend mentioned I have a daughter. Not that it mattered. I could tell she was a….” I look down at Embry then back at the woman. “Uh, someone I wouldn’t entertain the idea of knowing.” I give the woman a wink and hear the sweet sound of her soft giggle.
“Ah, yes. I don’t blame you.” We stand there looking at each other for a moment. She seems like a nice person, and her looks are very easy on the eyes as well. Seems to be a little younger than me, possibly by several years. “Well, I should go. Have a lot of cooking to do tonight.” I start to open my mouth as she begins to move, but she stops and looks at Embry. “I babysit, on the side, if you ever need someone.” I watch in fascination as she digs through her purse sitting in her cart and holds out a card to me. “It’s nothing fancy,” she says as I take it, a light blush covering her cheeks. “I love kids.”
“Well. Thank you.” I look at the card in my hand.
Charlotte Dawson
52641 Maple Dr #3
555-252-1212
“Nice to meet you, Charlotte.”
She smiles. “It’s Charleigh. Everyone calls me Charleigh.”
“Very well. Nice to meet you, Charleigh.”
“Well – um, nice to meet you too, um….” Her right brow raises playfully.
“Greer!” Embry squeals, moving her legs back and forth, kicking the cart.
We both laugh. “That’s Daddy to you, missy.” I lightly flick her little button nose and she squeals in delight. “Greer Markson.”
“Nice to meet you, Greer. Well, I better….” I give her a nod and watch her push her cart away and down an aisle.
“I like her, Daddy.”
Tearing my eyes off the empty space where Charleigh once was, I look at Embry and start pushing our cart. “Me too, Princess. Me too.”
Gianna took Embry to her mothers the next day – poor little girl – and I got her back for the weekend. Spent most days outside hanging Christmas lights then the evenings setting up and decorating our real Christmas tree that we chose together. Between work and the acclimation of the new house and life, I’m afraid I haven’t been very neighborly. I’ve literally buried myself in my work, case after case, then all my attention is on my sweet daughter when I have her. Except for the occasional mowing of my yard and coming and going, my neighbors must think I’m a recluse. Hmm, maybe I am becoming one.
Christmas came quickly. I got Embry Christmas Eve then Gianna took her to her mother’s Christmas morning. Does she never stay at home so Embry can be in her own room? I hated it. Oh, I loved having her that evening, opening up her presents, and watching the look of surprise and excitement on her sweet face. Hated not having her for the traditional opening of presents on Christmas morning and Santa coming in the dead of night the evening before. Gianna picked her up at the crack of dawn. If it weren’t for the excitement of getting more presents, Embry wouldn’t have awoken so early. Another change in my and Embry’s life.
Spring came fairly quick then before I knew it, it was late May, with the smell of freshly cut grass and my obsession with keeping my yard looking immaculate. Nothing better than keeping a yard well-manicured. Of course in Sunview the weather never gets bitter cold yet a little chilly in the evenings during what they consider winter. I love summer. Being outside in the fresh air. Maybe I’ll have to go to the garden center and pick out some flowers. Embry can help me plant them. I’ve never called Charleigh, almost feeling a bit guilty, yet not having a reason to. It’s not like I go out anywhere to need a babysitter and to be honest – I never want to leave Embry for a second while I have her. My time with her is too precious.
“Dude! Stop this work shit and let’s get a drink!” I look up at Matt and sigh, shaking my head. “C’mon! You haven’t let me drag you out in months!” His hands smack my desk as he leans down, staring at me.
“I’m fine the way my life is, Matt.” I grumble, lying through my teeth.
He laughs as he raises one hand and hits my desk again. “I call bullshit!” He’s right, of course. “Other than Embry, you have no life, my friend.” Sliding his hands off my desk, he sits down on one of the chairs in front of me. “Look, man.” He leans forward, resting his arms on his legs, and gives me a concerned look. “I love Embry and I’m glad you have her, but you can’t go on this way. You need to give life a chance. Give women a chance. They aren’t all like your ex.” Letting out a big sigh, I run my hands down my face in exasperation. “You deserve someone who will love you the way you would love them. She’s out there. If you don’t go out, you’ll never meet.”
Fuck! He’s right. I know he’s right. I’ve always known that, but I’m scared. Terrified actually. I’ll be damned if I’ll let him know that.
“Give me five minutes.” I grumble.
“Fantastic! You won’t be sorry!” I already am. He jumps out of the chair and practically waltzes out of my office.
True to my word, five minutes later we’re in his car driving to a bar. It’s not long before he pulls into a very crowded parking lot. I’m dreading this already. “Don’t you go to any other bars?” The same bar I met that waitress, pissed her off, watched her put that dark-haired woman in her place, then ran into her at our market. Charlotte. Charleigh. The same woman who gave me a card with her name and phone number saying she babysits. The card that lies in my desk drawer at home that I’ve glanced at on occasion but never used. It would be just my luck she’s working tonight.
“This is the best bar around.” He looks at me confused. “Why?”
Shit! I can’t tell him it’s because I’m afraid of seeing her. And why am I so afraid? Maybe it’s because you’re being an idiot and too scared of being hurt again. No, I wasn’t just hurt. It was devastating. Life changing. You don’t put yourself in that kind of position again then there’s no way it will happen again. Maybe it’s because when you bumped into Charleigh at the market you had – feelings. No way. No how. I’ve been guarding my heart and any emotions too carefully. She made you smile. Made you laugh. And hers was soft and sweet to your ears. You. Had. Feelings. Fuck. “Oh, no reason. I just thought since you finally got your way and dragged me out, you’d take me somewhere different.” I smile, hoping to be convincing. I’m trying to seem lighthearted instead of my heart beating against my chest, and my palms already beginning to sweat.
“We’ll go somewhere else next time.”
Fuck. Me.
“Here’s a table over here.” I follow him through the overly crowded bar, the music loud and the atmosphere dark. “Sit down and for God’s sake take off your suit jacket and loosen your tie. Try to relax and have fun. I’ll go get us some drinks.”
Some drinks. Can he just bring a full bottle of Jack and I can even skip the Coke? Taking a deep breath, I try to relax. Doing what he said, I remove my suit jacket, but instead of loosening my tie, I take it off completely and put it in my jacket pocket. Leaning my arms on the tabletop, I fold my hands and look around the room. Why does it seem that there’s always more women than men in bars? It feels like Matt is gone forever when a tall Jack and Coke is set down before me. “Took you long enough, man.” Picking it up, I take a long drink, feeling the cold bite as it goes down my throat.
“Sorry. He got held up at the bar so I brought it over.”
A sweet and soft voice makes me look up and into those blue eyes I fear I’ve missed a little too much. What? “You’re not wearing an apron nor carrying a tray. Not working tonight?” Why is my mouth suddenly dry? I take another long drink.
“No. It’s my night off.”
I drain the rest of the contents of my glass.
“Here you go.” Her hand moves from behind her and produces another tall drink. She sets it down next to my empty glass, and I let out a small laugh.
“You must think I’m a lush.” The sweet sound of her laughter invades my senses. Or maybe it’s the liquor. “Are you…. are you here with someone?” My eyes seem to move of their own accord around the room.
“Um. Nope. Sadly, this is like a home away from home for me so I feel comfortable coming here alone,” she sighs.
Before I think about my actions, my hand waves to the empty seat across from me. “Please. Sit.”
“Thank you,” she replies.
I take a drink when a waitress appears next to the table. “Charleigh. Want your usual?” She nods eagerly. “And for you?” Looking at my nearly empty glass, I take the last gulp then look up at the waitress. “Tonic and water with a twist.” She nods and walks away.
“Already done for the night?” I look at Charleigh and smile.
“Need to keep what’s left of my wits.” She laughs and I swear it does something strange to me. I open my mouth to speak when my phone rings in my suit jacket pocket. “Excuse me.” I look at the name on the screen and cringe. Why would she be calling me? “Hello?” I’m ready for my ear to be assaulted when the sweetest voice ever comes through.
“Daddy! I miss you!”
“I miss you too, Princess. Are you okay?” She’s never asked to call me on Gianna’s time. My heart skipped a beat at her voice but now is thumping in my chest with fear.
“I’m okay, Daddy. I just wanted to hear your voice in my ear.”
I feel the wetness in my eyes instantly. “I miss you so much, but it won’t be long and we’ll be together again. What are you doing tonight?” She rattles on about playing and being at Grandmudders, saying she didn’t have fun and was glad to be back home. Then she goes on about some man that’s visiting and I cringe.
“Mommy says I have to go. I love you, Daddy!”
“Bye, my sweet Princess.”
My new drink appears on the table and suddenly with a sad heart, I wish it was a Jack and Coke.
“That must be difficult.” My eyes snap to hers, almost forgetting she was sitting there. I watch in fascination as she wipes a tear from her eye. Who is this woman? Is she for real? “I can’t imagine what she’s going through. You as well.” I’m also allured by her full lips as she speaks. The way her lower lip is a little bigger than the upper. Her perfectly straight white teeth peeking out. “Was it recent?”
My eyes flutter up to hers. “Was what recent?” Fuck! I wasn’t paying attention. Well, I was but not to what she was saying.
“Your divorce.” I watch her pick up a glass of some dark liquid, her lips encasing the rim.
I cough and sit up straighter. “Oh. Uh, yes. Fairly. Enough that Embry and I are still trying to get into a new routine, my visitation with her one of them.”
“I’m so sorry. It’s none of my business but I’m still sorry. No one should have to go through that.” Her face is filled with sadness. I hate that. So, I decide to change the subject.
“Tell me about you.” Her eyes widen, briefly, then she smiles.
“Well, I’ve been working my way through college.” College? I knew she was younger. “Waitressing in the evenings and weekends, running a register at the market during the weekdays and evenings when I’m not here. I was lucky and got off tonight from both jobs.”
“Our market?” Her brows raise high into her forehead and I clear my throat. “I mean the market we bumped into each other?” She lets out a laugh. Why in the hell did I call it our market?
“Yes. The very one.”
“How in the hell do you find the time to actually study?” I’m intrigued by her. Fascinated.
“What little time I have off, during breaks, and I stay up rather late.” A sigh escapes her. “It’s exhausting but I’m determined to graduate and find a good full-time job.”
I can’t imagine, but I admire her determination. Makes me feel guilty that I had it so easy. Well, easier. My parents paid for my college and there was no need for a job so I had plenty of money and time to study. I had it really nice while here she is struggling.
“What do you want to do after college?” I ask, leaning my chin on my hand, really interested.
“I want to do something with children. Like open a daycare or preschool, maybe a combination, and help nurture their learning. Help them develop.” Amazing.
“So….” My phone decides to ring again. “Excuse me.” Turning in my seat, I put my phone to my ear and spot Matt sitting at the bar surrounded by women. He gives me a thumbs up and I just shake my head. “Hello. Emily?”