Chapter 6
Dinner was excellent, the company even better. By the time I walked Charleigh to the door it felt as though she was part of the family. Almost. Inside I was still shaking like a damn leaf. Afraid to get too involved. Put my heart out there. Think that this girl – this woman – would be as true as she acted. That she was really the good person I feel she is. Feel. There’s that fucking word again. Feelings. Emotions. Guys aren’t really that into them, we think with our heads – not just the one down south. With logic. Things have to make sense. Clear sound reasoning.
Right?
Then why does my heart beat so rapidly when I’m around her?
Why does everything she says draw all my attention?
When she laughs it causes me to not only smile but join in.
She smiles, and it brightens her entire face.
She’s so good with Embry.
Fuck. I’m still confused.
“Well, bro.” Emily walks into the living room in her nightgown and robe and sits down on the oversized chair next to the couch, holding a small container of ice cream and spoon. I’ve been nursing a drink since Charleigh left, which was only a few minutes ago, and making myself insane with my thoughts. Looking over at her, my brow raises as if asking a silent question. “I like her!” Her smile is so big, it’s alarming when it begins to fade. “No. Really. I like her.” I watch her shove a spoonful of ice cream into her mouth. Tilting her head, she gives me a strange look. “Don’t you?”
Grabbing my keys from the bowl by the door leading to the garage, I get in my car and take off at full speed. My mind is on only one thing as I pull into the parking lot, get out of my car, and walk up to the door. I don’t hesitate to knock. The door opens and instantly I see the surprised look on her face. She opens her mouth to speak, but I push my hand underneath her soft long hair, cup the back of her neck, and pull her into me as my mouth covers hers. Grabbing her arm, I pull and push until her back hits the wall next to the door and the most elicit moan escapes her perfect mouth and into mine. Releasing her arm, I cup her full breast with my hand over her shirt and bra and instantly feel my cock push against my pants. “I want you,” I whisper against her ear as I nip the lobe.
“Greer?”
I leave a scorching trail as I kiss down her neck and along the swell of her breast as I run my thumb over her perk nipple.
“Greer.”
Pulling her mouth harder against mine, my hand moves down and down until it’s underneath her shirt, then her bra to feel the silkiest skin I’ve ever….
“GREER!”
I blink rapidly focusing on Emily’s face that’s only a breath away from mine. “Mannnnnn, you have it so bad,” she says smiling as she backs up then sits down. Curling her legs beneath her, she smiles like a Cheshire cat or the cat who ate the canary. Whatever. She’s enjoying this a bit too much.
Leaning back on the couch, I take a sip of my drink, trying to act impassive. “I don’t know what you mean.” I take another drink and she – laughs. “I don’t find this a bit funny. I just went through a grueling divorce. Left the house my daughter grew up in and had to start all over. I assure you, I don’t have anything bad. She’s just a nice woman. That’s all.” I shrug, yet in my mind, I’m still thinking about that extremely vivid dream and trying to will my cock to deflate.
She smiles but doesn’t say anything. That can’t be good. Finally, she sighs as she leans back in the chair. It’s the serious look on her face that causes my curiosity to peak. “Greer. I know you’ve been through a lot, honey, but there’s someone out there for you. Someone who will love you fully, not want anyone else, and will be there for you in every sense of the word. She’s out there, Greer. Or maybe you’ve already met her.” She waggles her eyebrows as she eats another spoon of ice cream from the carton.
Shaking my head I look down. “I don’t know.”
“It’s not easy to trust after that.” My eyes snap to hers. “I’m sure. I know it won’t be for me either, but if you don’t give someone a chance you could miss out on something amazing.” I nod, knowing she’s right. “There’s a chance you could get hurt again.” That’s what I’m afraid of. “But do you really want to spend the rest of your life alone?”
Something about that coming from her makes my heart hurt. Suddenly the thought of being alone until my dying day causes a void to swell deep inside. It keeps expanding as I just stare at her, fear residing alongside.
“Greer. It’s okay to be scared.”
I blink once. Twice. “I’m not – scared.” That’s ridiculous. Okay it’s not but I’m not going to let her know that.
Standing, she smiles as she takes the two steps to me, leans down and kisses my cheek. “Whatever you say, brother. I’m going to bed.” She flitters away as if she’s won some kind of competition, something she’s been trying to do ever since we were little. I smile remembering all the things we’d do to try to win against each other. “Time to quit being a whiny, scared wuss, Greer. So you might get hurt. What if you don’t? What if she’s the one? Are you just going to let her get away?” she yells from the hallway.
Standing, I take my glass to the kitchen and put it in the dishwasher and march to my bedroom. Removing my clothes, I climb into bed and pull the covers over me. Resting my head on my arm, I look up at the ceiling. “No. No, I’m not.”
It was rough the next day at the office, but I need to finish getting my case ready for court. Yet all I did was constantly look at the clock. I need to get to her as quickly as possible and set up a date. With just the two of us. Somewhere we can go and get to know each other. I’m thinking of intimate restaurants when a loud cough sounds.
“Damn, man. This case isn’t as difficult as you’ve had in the past. In fact for you, it’s an easy one. Why the stewing?”
Looking up from my paperwork, I see the concerned look on Matt’s face. Does he think I’ve lost my touch? Have I? I’ve been so preoccupied with everything since the divorce. And now, I’m even more so yet for a different reason. “No, it’s not. I’m just going over everything again like I normally do. Why? What makes you think I’m stewing?” I mean, I am, but do I look like I am?
“I dunno, man,” he says, sitting on the chair in front of me. “Just looked like you were in deep thought or something. You haven’t been acting the same since we went to the bar the last time. You okay?”
It’s nice that he cares. Should I tell him about Charleigh? Maybe I should keep it to myself. Fuck! It’s one thing to talk to Emily about it – she’s a girl. Guys are different. We don’t talk about feelings and shit. Would be nice to get a man’s point of view though. He might think I’ve gone soft or not the man he thought I was.
“Look. I know it’s been difficult for you. I get it. Not that I’ve ever been married, but I still can be there for you. If you want to talk….”
“I think I found a woman.” I blurt. My eyes widen with my sudden outburst, and he smiles. “I mean…. I think I found someone I want to get to know better.”
“That’s great! Who is she?” He leans back into the chair, listening intently.
I sit back a bit, folding my hands on the desk. “Remember that waitress?” He appears to be thinking. “The one who waited on us that first night I went to the bar with you?” He shakes his head. “The one that accidentally spilled the drinks on her tray on that pretentious woman by us in the red dress?”
“Oh, yes!” Thank fuck! “I don’t really remember what she looked like though.”
Smiling, her face appears in my mind. “She’s beautiful. Long blonde hair, the bluest of eyes, sweet smile. I’ve talked to her a couple of times since then.” I really do admire her. “She fascinates me.” I blink rapidly, not realizing I’d said that out loud. “She came over for dinner last night.”
“Dinner. Sounds serious.” He laughs. My mouth turns into a smirk. Why did I think he’d understand? “No really. I’m happy for you, man. Glad to see you get out there. So, the waitress, huh?”
“She’s not just a waitress. She’s – so much more. She works two jobs and takes college courses. She has goals. Dreams. She loves kids. And….”
Standing he holds his hand up as if to stop my rambling. “Whoa. I got it.” Walking to the door, he opens it and turns around. “When are you seeing her next?” Good question. “You haven’t made plans?” Shaking his head he laughs. “The good ones get picked up quickly, my friend. Better make a move now.” He walks through the door and as he closes it he murmurs, “Good luck with that.”
Fuck!
Have I lost my touch?
Did I ever have a touch?
Shit, I feel like a young man again asking someone out on a first date. Where did my self-confidence go? It left when you found your ex in bed with another man. No! I’m not going to allow Gianna to rule the rest of my life. She may have thought she ruined my life, but I won’t let it. I just need to get the courage to move forward. Shouldn’t be difficult. Take the bull by the horns, so to speak. I can do that. I do it all the time in court. Why should this be any different? Because your heart is involved.
Oh yeah. That.
In early June, I watched moving trucks at house #14 on our street. Then the weekend after, I’d been invited to a basketball game at the house. Not having many friends and the love for the game, I was excited.
The guy who lives here is Erik. He and his friend Kyle are friendly, making me feel right at home. There was talk with the neighbors there about Erik being single then he stated he was gay. Doesn’t matter to me if he is. He’s really nice, and I’m having a great time. I asked if he and Kyle were friends or – something else – and Kyle blurts they were just friends. Erik seemed a little pissed about it.
It was almost the end of June when I was invited to the Millers for a pool party. Apparently, it was a surprise for Phillip for his birthday. Embry had a blast swimming while I got to know our neighbors better. After having a few drinks, Valley approached me. I’d caught her looks during the evening and didn’t know what to think. She asked me what my plans were for later in the evening. Thought that was a bit odd since she’s married. I told her I needed to get Embry home. She just kissed my cheek and whispered, “Bummer.” As too much drinking ensued, I took Embry home, but later learned Jayne, Phillip’s wife, accidentally spilled a drink on Erik’s shirt. He removed it so she could wash it and Valley thought it an invitation to remove her bikini. I guess half the partygoers ended up naked. Kind of glad I missed that and even moreso, glad I got Embry home before that happened. Can’t help but chuckle at the vision in my head though. Some party.