Chapter 14

If he turned back this verra minute…Temptation stung and burned like embers popping out of a fire. Nay. I canna turn back. Not now. There was no escaping the damned Heartstone and the goddesses with their heartless druthers. If Dwyn said the goddesses were already aware of Joanna—had even blessed her, in fact—he’d best face them. He’d learned that cruel lesson sixteen years ago when he’d been fool enough t’leave it to the elders.

He’d battle the powers head-on this time. Challenge them face t’face. And if he lost Joanna? Grant ripped the vines of kudzu to one side of the cave’s hidden opening. He shoved away the disturbing possibility just as he shoved the dense greenery out of the way. He wouldna lose her. Not the way he’d lost Leannan. If Joanna couldna believe what he shared and she sent him away, then he’d…

Grant drew a blank, a blank as dank and empty as the cave in front of him. He didna ken what he’d do if Joanna sent him away. He sucked in a deep breath. Aye. I ken what I’ll do. I’ll no’ go away. I’ll follow her to the ends of the earth until she sees m’love for her is true. He turned and held out his hand, newfound determination tensing every fiber within him. “This cave leads to what I wish t’show ye.”

Joanna looked at him, one brow arched, her thumbs looped through the backpack straps around her shoulders. She didn’t speak, but Grant heard her thoughts just as clearly as if she’d shouted. Leeriness shone in her eyes, chipping away at his resolve.

“Joanna…please.” He willed her to trust him, yet even more, he willed her to believe and accept what she was about to see.

Joanna stared at Grant’s outstretched hand a long moment. Eyes narrowed. Her look pensive. Finally, she slid her backpack off her shoulders, plopped it to the ground between her feet, and searched through it until she finally straightened with some sort of black strapping attached to a round object in one hand. She unwound the strap, placed the circle of black and clear plastic in the center of her forehead, then smoothed and tightened the dark elastic banding around her head and looped her ponytail through the end of it. She squeezed the sides of the circle and a blinding blue-white light burst forth like a shining beacon powered by her mind. She returned the backpack to her shoulders and nodded toward the rear of the cave. The light beam shining from her forehead bounced up and down the shadowy stone walls. “Okay. Let’s do this.”

Grant decided not to tell her that once they reached the entrance to the secret tunnels there would be no need for her wee light. ’Twould only befuddle her and make winning her complete trust even more difficult. He held out his hand. “Aye. This way then.”

Joanna took his hand, her fingers cold and clammy but her grip strong and true. He led her deeper into the cave, walking slowly to keep her from losing her footing. The uneven surface of the floor was slippery and treacherous with slimy river muck, rocks, and debris. He felt her shiver, whether from the damp chill of the cavern or the feeling of doom riding heavy in the air, he didna ken. All he knew for certain was that he felt the same.

“The cave narrows until we get around the bend created by the left wall closing inward.” He splayed his hand high upon the rock wall to his left as Joanna swung her light to see what he was talking about. “Ye see how it seems t’close off in front of us just up ahead?”

Joanna nodded, her steps slowing as though she thought their journey was nearly over.

Grant gently pressed against the small of her back, pulling her in front of him and urging her forward. “There’s a space between the walls at the rear of the cave. Ye see it just there? Room enough for us to slip through, and then ye’ll see the steps.”

“Steps?”

“Aye. Steps of stone leading upward to protect the tunnels when the river happens to flood.”

“Tunnels?” Joanna’s voice had taken on a strained squeak, higher in pitch with every word she uttered.

Grant felt Joanna’s uncertainty more keenly with every step. But there was no helping it. Not until she’d seen everything and understood the entirety of Clan MacDara’s history and duty to mankind.

They squeezed through the narrow passage at the rear of the cave. Joanna walked through easily, but Grant had to turn sideways and expel all his air to push through the tight space. He hated this damn entrance and was certain that the druid clans had built it this way just to punish him for his defiance of the goddesses.

“I see the steps.” Joanna halted so quickly, the back of her head thumped against the center of Grant’s chest. “Are you kidding me? A spiral staircase of stone? At the back of a cave?”

“Aye.” Grant took in a deep breath and felt along the cool, damp wall to his right. Dwyn had promised the passage had been checked and restocked with everything needed for today. If that was the case, lanterns, flashlights, or some form of light would’ve been placed in the storage hole that had been cut into the cave wall. He exhaled when the back of his hand finally brushed against something a great deal smoother than the surface of the wall. A lantern. One like his brother Ross had shown him that turned on by twisting the top handle until it clicked. Brilliant light flooded the eerie chamber, chasing all shadows away from the winding stone stairway disappearing up into the earth.

“Up we go, then.” Grant held the lantern high and attempted to sound a great deal more positive than he felt. “Mind the height of each step, lass. They’re wicked on yer shins.”

Joanna climbed in silence, her hands raised shoulder high and inching along the cave walls on either side of her. The light from the lantern strapped to her forehead barely lit the winding spiral of stone that seemed to go upward into the darkness forever. “How far is it?” she asked, stopping her climb to stare upward.

Grant lifted the lantern higher. “Not nearly so far as it seems. I promise ye once we reach the tunnels the journey willna be so bad.”

“And you still can’t tell me where you’re taking me?”

“I fear ye wouldna understand without seeing proof with yer own eyes.”

“Proof of what?”

What could he say to ease her fears and help her feel closer to him so once they reached the final chamber she might accept all he had to say? “Proof of my family’s history. All ye should know about me afore we…” Words failed him, his voice trailing off like the lantern beams fading into the shadows. What would she say if he spoke his heart right now? Dare I risk it?

Joanna carefully shuffled around on the stone step until she’d turned and fully faced him. Her headlight hit him square in the eyes, flooding his sight with blue-white light. He cupped one hand across her forehead while keeping his eyes averted. “Can ye turn that damn thing off?”

“Oh. Sorry.” Joanna reached up and flipped the switch and the headlamp went dark. “Better?”

Grant blinked, keeping his own lantern down at his side to gently light the chamber without blinding either one of them. “Aye. Much, thank ye.”

The fact that she’d turned around to face him made him even more uneasy—if that was possible. “Why have ye turned, Joanna? Have ye gone as far as yer willing to go?”

She looked up at him for a long moment, chewing the corner of her lip like she always did when she was sorting out what she was about to say. Finally, she reached out and barely stroked the backs of her fingers up his jawline. “I’ve gone as far as I’m going until you finish your sentence. Talk to me, Grant. Time to ’fess up.”

“What sentence?” He knew exactly what she meant, but he wasna ready to come forward and confess all—at least not unless she forced him. Telling the woman she belonged to him while they made love was one thing, but saying it now…

“All ye should know about me afore we…” she repeated, sounding stilted and archaic as though she were reading from an old English Puritan manuscript rather than mimicking a Scottish burr. “Before we what?” she asked again, her voice falling to a coaxing whisper.

The chilly, damp air of the passage suddenly seemed infinitely warmer, and Grant tensed as beads of sweat trickled down his back and settled in the crack of his arse. Now what the hell do I say?

Joanna stared up at him. She didn’t blink. Just watched him—motionless and waiting. Her eyes were wide and dark, their deep green color indiscernible in the low light of the cave. She stood so close that he swore he could hear her heartbeat—or maybe that was his own blood he heard a-poundin’ in his ears.

He pulled in a deep breath. Damnation—this is worse than plannin’ any battle. He leaned around her and balanced the lantern on one of the steps above her. Maybe it was time. Time to reveal his heart before he showed her his past.

“I ha’ been alone a long time, ye ken?”

Joanna didn’t respond, just shifted in place and hooked her thumbs in the straps at her shoulders.

Grant swallowed hard. The light of the lantern on the steps behind her made it even harder to read her face. The shadows concealed the nuances of her emotions, hid all hints to her thoughts. Grant shuffled his feet and pressed his hands on the walls on either side of him. “I’m no’ sayin’ I’ve been celibate. I already admitted such to ye. But…”

Joanna still didn’t speak, even though Grant silently wished she’d do her usual prompting to help him force the words free.

“…but when I…when the two of us…when yer by my side…” Grant fisted his hands against the walls, grinding his knuckles into the stones until he felt the rocks biting into his flesh. “When I finally found the courage t’move forward with officially wooin’ ye—spendin’ all m’time with ye—I felt…”

“Wooin’ me?” The firm, soft weight of Joanna’s hand touching the center of his chest urged him on. The soft, teasing tone of her voice gave him the courage he needed.

“Loneliness is a cruel, heavy burden, lass.” He covered her hand with his and pressed her palm tighter to his heart. “But ye took it away,” he whispered, “and I canna bear for that burden to return.”

The only sound in the cavern was the soft humming of the LED bulb inside the lantern and the faraway shush of the waves on the shore. Joanna slid free of his grasp and cradled his face between her hands, her palms cool and soft, soothing against his skin. She leaned closer, searching his face in the shadows as though trying to recognize him for the man he said he was. “Tell me, Grant. I need to hear you say it. Plain and simple. You have no idea just how much I need to hear you say exactly what you mean so there are absolutely no doubts between us. I can’t do doubts again. Not with anybody. Especially not with you.”

“I love ye, Joanna. I dinna ken how much plainer I can say it.”

“That’s plain enough,” Joanna whispered as she slid her arms around him. She snuggled against his chest, tucking her head up under his chin. “And for the record, I’m pretty positive I’m in love with you too.”

“Pretty positive?” Grant tightened his arms around her and laced his fingers in her hair. “I dinna like the sound of ‘pretty positive.’ Yer no’ certain? Ye dinna ken in yer heart if ye love me?” If she wasna certain now, how would she feel when he took her to the hidden chamber and revealed the MacDara legacy?

“I’m ‘pretty sure’ because I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.” Then her soft giggle bubbled up between them. “I do ‘ken’ it in my heart, you silly man. I love you—for sure. I can’t imagine life without you.”

“Much better.” Grant lifted her face to his, gently brushing his mouth across hers as he did his damnedest to maintain control even though all he wanted to do right now was sweep Joanna up into his arms and carry her away where no one could ever find the two of them. “And I am a stubborn man. Especially when it comes to those I love, aye?”

“Aye.” Joanna giggled and pulled his head down for a proper kiss.