Chapter Two
Bannack was still shaking slightly from his conversation with Loralia when he lowered his second load of boxes to the stack in the emergency chamber. He hadn’t meant to be so emotional. This wasn’t the time for that. There was too much to be done and too much danger still lingering all around them for him to allow his mind to wander that way, to think so much about himself rather than the rest of the group. He had held the idea of the Irisa tying ceremony in his heart since she had told him about it, and hadn’t forgotten the way that Loralia’s eyes shimmered and the soft glow around her intensified just slightly when she talked about it that day when they were standing in the underground village that she used to share with the members of her kind before they were destroyed by the unexpected plague. He had known since then that he wanted desperately to give her that experience. She had offered herself to him and to the Denynso form of bonding so willingly and without question, and Bannack had only fallen more deeply in love with her.
The thought of them being able to engage in the tying ceremony together had been made seemingly impossible soon after when Jem disappeared and the Denynso decided to leave the compound and tour Uoria in the way of the old Denynso kings. As much as he loved her and wanted the experience for them, the warrior devotion within him had taken over, reminding him that he had responsibilities and duties to his kind that he had to attend to first. He wanted comfort and peace before he gave her the ceremony that she wanted and deserved.
Now he was facing even more conflict than they had before, but had witnessed Samira and Ty marry. Rather than it seeming that their celebration had been marred by what was now happening around them, their union seemed to have strengthened them and made them even more confident in their convictions against Ryan and his army. Now Bannack felt like he wasn’t protecting Loralia by waiting for the ideal moment for them to have their ceremony. Rather, he was hurting both of them, preventing them from being able to experience something that would be more than just a cherished moment in their lives, but something that defined them.
There would be no perfect moment. There would never be a time when there wasn’t danger on the horizon or questions in the backs of all their minds. Even when the war was over, he knew that they wouldn’t ever be able to put it completely behind them. The Denynso carried every battle with them, no matter how swift the victory or total the destruction of the enemy. It was what made them and what continued to build them. This would change them in ways that would linger with them always. The reality was that every moment that he spent with Loralia, no matter what was happening, as long as he knew that she was breathing and that he would hold her in his arms again, was as close to perfect as he had ever experienced. The only thing that could make his life better would be to know that they were fully committed to each other in the ways that both of their hearts had prepared to be committed since they were children.
Thinking about it, however, had only seemed to make not being able to have it even more difficult. There was so much happening around them that he couldn’t even begin to think about when the conflict might end. It could take only a few days to destroy the enemy army and eliminate Ryan once and for all, or the war could continue for months, or even years like the conflict with the Klimnu.
“Could everyone please gather for a moment?” Pyra shouted.
The room fell silent and the group drifted closer to him. Bannack felt Loralia come up behind him and slip her hand into his. The touch was soft and tender, and Bannack wrapped his grip around it.
“Is everything alright, Pyra?” Eden asked, stepping up to her mate.
“I think it’s time that I let everyone else know what’s happening,” he said. “I’ve hesitated to share this information with some of you because I didn’t want to cause any more upset or fear, but I don’t think that there’s any other option at this point.” He drew in a breath and looked around at them. “Ryan’s tyranny goes deeper than any of us expected. We have recently uncovered disturbing evidence of the experiments and breeding program. As a result of this, our number has increased significantly, as has the pressing urgency with which we must leave. Ciyrs has informed me that the wounded are responding well to their healing and we should soon be ready to leave.”
“What did you find, Pyra?” Azra asked.
Pyra took a deep breath and looked out over the group. It was almost as if he had been hoping that he wouldn’t have to explain what he had told them, and that he would just be able to move ahead with the conversation, but now he knew that he was going to have to tell them. Bannack listened as the warrior leader described the facilities that they found on the floor beneath them and the people that they rescued. He felt his stomach turn as Pyra told of their injuries and what the hybrid woman had told them about Ryan’s torturous retraining techniques.
“What will we do with them?” Zuri asked. “We can’t just leave them here. They can’t take care of themselves.”
“I know that,” Pyra said. “That’s why it’s more important than ever before for us to leave as soon as possible. We need to get them away from here and figure out how to get them the care that they need. For now, we need to decide how everyone will travel. We still have the shuttle that we rode from Penthos, unless it has been commissioned for another trip. Jonah and Oro brought a vehicle that can accommodate several people. Jonah has informed me that he will be staying here.”
There was a ripple of gasps and protests through the group, and Pyra held up a hand.
“He has his reasons,” he said loudly. “He is staying here to continue with his own mission, and as much as I would like him to be with us, he has my support.”
“I will stay with him.”
The voice was weak and unfamiliar, and when Bannack turned toward the door, he saw a strange man step inside the chamber. He was no longer wearing the dark hood, but Bannack knew that he was one of the hybrids that had fought against them. His defenses immediately surged forward and Bannack felt himself wanting to rush at the man, take out everything that was still built up within him. Loralia’s grip tightened on his hand and he knew that she had tuned into him, was feeling what he was and was stopping him from doing anything. He knew that meant that she must be getting overwhelmed by everything that was happening around them and needed this connection to help her understand. The moment gave Bannack the chance to breathe and remind himself what Pyra had just told them about the hybrids and what they had been through. He relaxed and stepped back toward Loralia.
“You shouldn’t be up yet,” Ciyrs said to the man.
He shook his head.
“I’m fine,” he said. “I feel better than I have in a long time. That’s why I’ll stay here with Jonah. There are others who aren’t ready to leave yet. They need more time to heal and they’ll need help. I will stay here and take care of them.”
Pyra nodded.
“Thank you,” he said. “I’m sure that Jonah will appreciate all of the assistance he can get.” He turned toward where Rilex was standing. “Do you know of any others who will stay?” he asked.
“I haven’t spoken to all of them,” Rilex said, “but I know that there are several who are still is poor condition, and others who are unwilling to leave. That isn’t all of them, though. The woman who first called to Eden is very eager to leave. She wants to get as far from the facility as she can. She is willing to go anywhere with us.”
Pyra nodded again.
“So be it,” he said. “Continue to prepare. We will leave tomorrow night.”
****
The group was dissipating under Pyra’s command and Loralia watched as several of them walked toward the back of the chamber, revealing Azrael standing across the room from her. He was still looking up toward Pyra, giving her the opportunity to look at him for several long seconds, evaluating him without him noticing. She wished she knew what he was feeling, but somehow, she knew that he had blocked himself off long ago and wouldn’t permit her to read him the way that she could others. Her eyes traced his tall, muscled body and the wings that hung low at the sides of his body. They were torn and broken, showing the scars of countless conflicts, and Loralia felt a sudden pull toward him. It seemed to have settled into her mind and heart that this was truly her father. Rather than the man who had raised her and taught her all that she knew about using the skills and capabilities given to her by her Irisa blood, it was actually this man who had created her. Something swelled inside her and she strode toward him.
“Did you know about me?” she asked as she approached Azrael.
The man turned toward her, seemingly startled by her sudden appearance beside him as much as the question.
“Yes,” he answered without hesitation.
Bannack walked up behind her and placed his hand on her back.
“Are you alright?” he asked.
Loralia nodded.
“Loralia,” Azrael said carefully, “can we go somewhere and talk? I would very much like the opportunity to meet you officially.”
Loralia nodded, not trusting herself if she tried to speak at that moment. They turned and she guided him back toward the room where Bannack had been gathering supplies. It was still empty and she led Azrael inside, silently relaying to Bannack that she didn’t want anyone else to come in. When Bannack took his place at the door, Loralia turned back to Azrael.
“Did you know about me?” she asked again.
Azrael nodded and took a step toward her.
“I did,” he said. “I knew about you before your mother did, and I have loved you since that moment.”
Loralia’s heart ached, but she wasn’t sure why. There were too many emotions flowing through her, too many questions and possibilities, too many moments that could have been but had been shattered before she was ever able to live them.
“Then why?” she asked. “Why did you go away?”
“I didn’t want to,” Azrael said. “I wanted to marry your mother and raise you as a family. I wanted us to be together, but it was too dangerous.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I know you don’t,” Azrael said, “and I wish that there was something that I could say or do that would help make it easier for you.”
“Nothing about this is easy for me,” she said.
“It isn’t for me, either. I’ve waited your entire life to meet you.”
“You have?” Loralia asked.
“Of course, I have. You and your mother have been the most precious things in my life since the moment that I knew that you were coming. You have only just found out about me, but I have missed you and waited for you for years. Most of it I never thought that I would see you. I thought that you had died with the others.”
Loralia’s head hung as she felt a pang of longing for the family that she had lost when she was younger, leaving her completely alone until she met Bannack.
“Why did you go?” she asked. “Why did you never come for me.”
“I told you,” he said. “It was too dangerous. Your mother and I wanted to be together. We had our life planned and I couldn’t wait to see you. The times were complicated then, though. The Irisa were dying and the Valdicians were destroying the planet along with their allies. We intended for her to go into hiding along with the others and stay safe there until the conflict was over, then we would be back together. I was trying to protect you by staying away. I didn’t want to do anything that might put either one of you in any more danger than you already were.”
“And then?” Loralia asked.
“I waited. I waited for as long as I could and then I came for you. I searched. I went back to the entrance to the underground settlement and searched, but I couldn’t find it. I looked everywhere, but the blocks that had been put on the entrances were too strong. They kept me from finding them. I couldn’t get to you. I never stopped thinking about you. Never. Then I heard that the Irisa were gone and it felt like my soul had been taken from me. I thought that you were gone. I had already lost your mother. I couldn’t bear the thought of never getting to even meet you.”
“They are gone,” Loralia said. “All of them. I’m the only one who survived.”
Azrael nodded.
“I know,” he said. “Do you know why?”
Loralia shook her head.
“I never got sick the way the others did. There was nothing I could do, and then they were all gone and I was alone.”
“The Irisa became very ill when the Valdicians came. You do not have pure Irisa blood in your veins, and that is what kept you alive. There is enough of me within you that it prevented the illness from taking you.”
“So, in a way, you have protected me my entire life.”
Loralia could see a mist of tears in Azrael’s eyes and the resistance and anger that she had felt for the large winged man when she first saw him melted away.
“Will you tell me about your mother?” he asked, his voice sounding soft and choked. “Was she happy?”
Loralia nodded.
“Yes,” she said. “My father…” she paused and took a breath, “the man who I thought was my father, loved her very much. He loved both of us.”
“I’m glad,” Azrael said. “I wouldn’t want for her to be alone and without love.” He hesitated briefly. “She never told you about me?” he asked.
Loralia shook her head.
“No,” she said. “But don’t be angry with her. I know that she would never hurt me, and I believe that she never would have hurt you. I only remember him, but I know now that she wasn’t always with him. There was a time when she waited for you, but when you didn’t come back, or when she was told that she wouldn’t be allowed to leave and go find you, she might have been afraid of what it would mean to raise me alone. She knew that I wasn’t going to be like the others.”
“You don’t have wings,” Azrael said.
Loralia nearly laughed but she didn’t know why. She shook her head.
“No,” she said. “I never have. But there are things about me that are different. The color of my eyes. I glow. It’s faint, but it’s there. And…” she hesitated.
“And?” he asked.
They stared at each other for a few seconds and she suddenly felt a strong rush of emotion wash over here. There was fear and nervousness, excitement and joy, sadness and longing. The strongest, though, was an overarching feeling of love. Loralia gasped slightly.
“You can feel,” Azrael said softly. “You can read others.”
Loralia nodded.
“I think that I always knew,” she said.
“Always knew what?” Azrael asked.
“My mother loved the man I believed to be my father. They were very happy together until the end. No matter how happy she was, though, there was always something else there. I could always feel the emptiness within her. There was a faint haze of sadness over everything that she felt. I knew that there was something that she was missing, something that was so deep within her that she didn’t even want to touch it, much less share it with anyone around her. Now I know that that was you.”
Loralia took out her compact and heard Azrael give a slight gasp, like he was looking at something from his past. She touched the back and felt a small lip of metal. Tucking her fingernail beneath the lip, she opened the hidden compartment of the compact and withdrew the fine, delicate fabric from inside. When she held it out toward Azrael, tears pooled under the man’s eyes and then trickled down his cheeks.
“This was hers,” Loralia said. “She gave it to me when I was younger, but never told me why. I’ve had it with me my entire life.”
Azrael nodded and reached for the fabric. She draped it over his fingers and allowed him to examine it lovingly for a few long seconds. The delicate strip of fabric unfolded and he ran his fingertips along it.
“This was for our tying ceremony,” he said, so softly that Loralia barely heard him.
“She never told me why she had it, but I knew that it wasn’t from her and my…” her voice trailed off again and Azrael shook his head.
“It’s alright, Loralia. That man was there for you when I wasn’t able to be. He gave you what I couldn’t and ensured that you and your mother weren’t alone. I will always be grateful to him for that. He was your father, but I hope in your heart you know that I am, too, and that I love you.”
“I do,” Loralia said. “As much as there was a part missing from my mother, I knew there was a part missing from me as well. I’m glad to have found that part.”
She stepped forward and offered her arms to Azrael. For a moment, he looked at them as if he didn’t remember what it meant to embrace someone, as if the years of being hardened by fierce battles and bloody confrontations while longing for the only family that he would ever create had taken from him any memory of showing affection. Soon, though, he opened his arms as well and took her into them, holding her close to his chest and resting his cheek against the top of her head. Loralia felt him relax, as if finally holding his child after so long removed a lifetime of tension and pain from his muscles.
When they parted, Loralia turned and walked over to Bannack. She took him by the hand and led him back across the room.
“This is my mate,” she said, “Bannack. Bannack, this,” she gestured toward Azrael, “is my father.”
Loralia saw Bannack’s eyes widen, but he reached forward to grasp the Eteri man’s hand in greeting.
“Hello,” he said. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“It is very nice to meet you,” Azrael said. “Thank you for taking care of my daughter.”
Something flashed in Bannack’s eyes as he glanced at Loralia and then back at Azrael.
“I love Loralia with everything that is in me. I was born to be her mate and to take care of her as her mate, but I would like very much if I was able to give her the union that she dreamed of. If you would give me permission, I would be honored to have a tying ceremony with your daughter.”
Loralia’s heart felt like it was soaring. Her eyes filled with tears as she saw the first smile touch Azrael’s lips.
“I can think of nothing that would make me happier than to give you my permission and witness your binding,” he said.