Chapter 6: Laney
Three Years Earlier
Travis found out about my poster today. The one I used to keep on the wall across from my bed. The one where he’s looking into the camera, wearing jeans so low on his hips that you can practically follow the V of his pelvis all the way down to his…ugh.
Obviously, I took it down the second I found out that my dad was marrying his mom. I was going to throw it away, but I wanted to do it when Dad was out of the house to make sure he didn’t see me carrying around a sexy poster of my new stepbrother, so I stuffed it into a box under my bed.
And then I forgot about it. Until today.
When we moved from my old house into this huge new one, I didn’t unpack most of my things. I think I just didn’t want this place to feel like home. I mean, it’s huge, and it’s gorgeous, with big glass windows looking out over the Pacific Ocean…but it feels like the kind of place other people are supposed to live. Between Nina pacing up and down the halls practicing monologues and Travis teasing me every time I cross paths with him, I feel like I’m on some kind of terrible family-swapping reality show.
But this morning, I decided that even if it wasn’t ever going to feel like home, I wasn’t going to magically get my old life back by keeping my stuff in boxes. So I started pulling everything out, decorating my room and filling up my closet. And that’s when I saw it. Travis’ face, looking right at me like I’m the most delicious thing on the menu.
I definitely needed to get it out of the house ASAP. I don’t trust Travis not to snoop around my room while I’m out with friends, and if he found this…God, he’d never let me live it down. He already thinks I’m secretly dying to jump his bones, and if he knew about this poster and the stupid little celebrity crush that went with it…
Yeah, this thing needed to be gone. And I was pretty sure I was alone in the house. Dad and Nina were in New Orleans for the week trying to get Nina cast in the new season of some terrible cop show, and I didn’t hear Travis. Usually when Travis is home, I can tell. He’s either blasting music, practicing tricks on the half-pipe in the backyard, or working out in his room. And since our rooms are right next to each other, separated by what has to be the thinnest wall in California, I can always hear when he’s in his room. And since I didn’t hear anything, I got the idea that maybe I was safe to dump this thing into the nearest trash can and make sure Travis never found it.
Just to be safe, I rolled the poster up so that Travis was on the inside, and then I left my room and made a beeline for the trash can just inside the front door.
But of course Travis was in the kitchen. And when I couldn’t hide the fact that I really didn’t want him to ask what I was throwing away, he got curious.
“What’s that?”
“It’s…uh…” I’m not used to having a celebrity for a stepbrother yet: I keep get flustered talking about normal boring stuff, so there’s no way I can hide this. “It’s none of your business.”
I grab the trash can lid with my foot, but my hand hesitates before I can dump the poster. After all, what’s to stop Travis from pulling it out after I leave?
“You’re throwing away a perfectly good poster? Why? I’ll take it, my walls are empty.”
Travis gets up and starts walking towards me, with a glint in his eyes like he knows what’s about to happen. He gently takes the poster from my hands, and I bite my lip as I watch him do it.
Busted.
Travis laughs. “Well, well, well. I remember this. We were originally going to put it in Hot Pink magazine, but they said it was ‘inappropriate.’ They didn’t like that I was doing this.” Travis pulls his jeans down like he’s doing on the poster, showing off the perfect V of his hips.
“Ew! Don’t pull your pants down around me!” I shield my eyes, but Travis just laughs.
“Laney, if you didn’t want to see this, why did you put a poster of it up on your wall?”
I bring my face back to Travis’ trying not to look down at his jeans, which are dangerously low at this point.
“Tori gave it to me.” I mean, she gave it to me because I asked if I could have it, but still… “And I took it down the second I found out you were going to be my stepbrother. Now give it back to me so I can throw it away.”
I reach for the poster, but Travis picks it up and pulls it away. “Not so fast, sis. It’s a perfectly good poster. If you don’t want it, I’ll take it.”
I shoot Travis a glare of death. He might be a famous athlete, but his real talent is definitely getting under my skin. Yeah, I’m sure he’d love to have my poster. A reminder that I hung it up on my wall before I met him.
I snatch the poster out of Travis’ hands. “Fine, I won’t throw it away. I’ll just throw it back under my bed.”
A victorious glint shines in Travis’ eyes. “Good idea. Just remember: if you ever want to see more, I’m just a room away.”
So now, thirty minutes later, I’m holed up in my room, too embarrassed to even go into the kitchen and make myself something to eat for fear of running into Travis. I can feel his blue eyes watching me from under my bed, but it’ll be even worse if I step out there. He’ll probably be shirtless, with his jeans slung low, looking at me like he is in the poster…
I never thought I’d say this, but Nina can’t get home soon enough.
***
Tori looks down at the poster, clearly more amused than I am.
“So he actually pulled his pants down like this?”
Even though Travis is outside and my parents are out of town, I’m still paranoid that someone could overhear us. Travis has a way of appearing out of thin air at the worst possible time.
“He pulled them even lower,” I whisper, “And then……”
I walk over to the window, just to make sure that Travis is still outside. Yep, he’s still out there on the half pipe, giving “bike lessons” to some bottle-blonde supermodel who thought that a low-cut red dress was acceptable clothing for learning how to ride a dirt bike. It’s pretty clear that she’s just trying to get in Travis’ pants. I mean, he’s trying to show her how to use the brake, and she’s not even looking down at the bike.
Tori looks at me expectantly. “And then…”
I turn away from the window. “And then he said, ‘If you ever want to see more, I’m just a room away.’”
Tori bursts out laughing.
“But he was probably just teasing me. I mean, he’s been saying stuff like that ever since we moved into this place. He thinks it’s funny to make me blush.”
“And you’re sure that’s all it is. A big joke.”
I shrug, and gesture over to the window. “I mean, look at that. If he can get any girl he wants to go to bed with him, why would he want his stepsister?”
Tori looks out the window. “I don’t know. But he doesn’t seem very interested in getting in bed with her.”
I follow Tori’s gaze, and see Travis trying to convince the supermodel that she’s going to need a helmet when she’s on the bike. She looks like she’d rather die than put it on.
“Look at what she’s wearing, though. She’s not here to learn how to ride a motorbike. She’s going to get tired of this stupid fake lesson, and then Travis is going to bring her back up here and I’m going to have to listen to him make her scream his name all night long.”
Tori gives me a look. “You sound like you’re jealous.”
“Tori! Ew! He’s my stepbrother!”
“Yeah, and before that, you had a poster of him right above your bed. What would you do if you ran into him last year and said what he said to you yesterday? Would you still think he was just teasing you?”
I can’t even imagine. Last year feels like a lifetime ago. Back then, we’d stay up late at my old house in Pasadena, talking about what we were going to do when we graduated, what we wanted our lives to be like. It’d usually start out serious and end up with me as president and Tori as a high-powered CEO…both of us married to our favorite celebrities, of course. Even back then, we knew it was kind of ridiculous, fantasizing about the lifestyles of the rich and famous…but hey, it’s powerful stuff. Who doesn’t want a glamorous life? That’s what I thought, anyway. Now, I live in a huge, expensive house, have two celebrities in the family, and I’m starting to miss Pasadena.
“I don’t know what I would do.”
Tori narrows her eyes at me. “Yes you do. Don’t think I’ve forgotten how you talked about him last year. You’d hop into bed with him so fast that it’d break the sound barrier.”
“You don’t know that!”
Tori looks at the poster on the floor, looks back at me, and then raises her eyebrows.
“Okay, fine, I probably would, but what does that matter now? He’s my stepbrother!”
Tori’s not buying it. “So you’re telling me all those feelings magically went away the second your dad married his mom?”
“They had to. He’s got every paparazzi in the country watching him and an army of fans that follow him around on the internet. If I…you know……did something inappropriate, it’s be a huge scandal. It’d ruin his career and my life.”
Tori nods. “Okay. I get that. But are you seriously telling me that if he walked into your room wearing no shirt and those jeans, and he gave you that look,” she points to the poster, “And he ordered you to pull back the blankets and let you in…you’d tell him no?”
The image makes my breath catch in my throat, and I shudder as I try to shake it out of my head. “I’d have to. If I told him yes, it’d all be over. Besides, he was definitely just teasing me.”
Tori doesn’t buy that for a second, but she lets it slide. “Alright. If you say so. But somehow, I don’t think this is the last time we’re going to be having this conversation.”
I sigh, and look out the window at Travis and the supermodel. “Does she look familiar to you? I feel like I’ve seen her before.”
Tori leans into the window and squints down into the dark backyard. “Yeah, actually…doesn’t she do those stupid burger commercials?”
That’s where I recognize her from. She’s in those awful fast food commercials that play every ten minutes on TV. The ones that pander to horny guys by having her bite into a triple cheeseburger with her boobs hanging out everywhere. She’s usually doing something she’d never do in real life, like sitting in a monster truck, riding a mechanical bull, or straddling a dirt bike. That’s probably why she’s getting bike lessons. It’s part of her personal brand.
“Ugh, yeah, that’s it. You’d better be right about Travis, because if he has sex with that girl right next to me, I’m never going to be able to look at a hamburger again.”
Tori shoots me a look, but doesn’t say anything. Instead, we move away from the window, sit back down on the floor, and start talking about other things.
Eventually, Tori gets a text from her boyfriend. He’s at a party downtown, and he wants Tori to come join him.
“Go ahead,” I say, “Because you’re definitely not going to want to be here when Travis brings that girl back to his room.”
And with that, we say our goodbyes, Tori heads out to her car, and I get ready for a long night of holding my pillow over my head to block out the sex noises. But before I do that, I decide to sneak out of my room for a snack and a trip to the bathroom before the two soon-to-be lovebirds come back in.
But it’s too late. By the time I make it into the kitchen, she’s leaning against the kitchen counter. And when I come into her field of vision, her head snaps towards me and she looks at me like I’m intruding on her territory.
“Who are you supposed to be?”
“I’m Laney, Travis’ stepsister. This is my house.” I open up the fridge, pull out some hummus, and stick a fork in it for emphasis. “Who are you supposed to be?”
The supermodel sizes me up like she doesn’t quite believe that I’m really Travis’ stepsister. “I’m Monica. Monica Caldwell. But you knew that, right? I mean, you watch TV, don’t you?” Monica gestures to her face.
“Yeah, I know you’re the girl who eats burgers in slow motion, I just didn’t know your name.”
I wasn’t even really trying to get under Monica’s skin, but it looks like I did. She must get that a lot. “Well, now you do. And pretty soon, you’ll be seeing it everywhere, because I’m about to sign a 1 million dollar endorsement deal with the biggest extreme sports agency in the country”
I eat a forkful of hummus and try to look impressed. “Wow. You must be pretty good to get that kind of money.”
Monica looks to the side. “Well…I will be, thanks to Travis. We’re going to be the king and queen of motocross.”
“I don’t know about that,” Travis says, appearing in the doorway, “First you’ve got to put on a helmet.”
As soon as she sees Travis, Monica completely changes. It’s like someone flipped a switch on her back.
“There you are!” She says, in a voice that’s so syrupy sweet I almost spit out my hummus, “I was wondering where you went. I was just telling your sister Lamey about the endorsement deal I signed.”
“Stepsister,” I say through clenched teeth.
“Oh, yeah? Did you tell her that it means I’m contractually obligated to give you bike lessons? And her name’s Laney, by the way.”
Monica nods, and then shoots a look my way like she wants me to leave. And yeah, I wanted to leave a couple seconds ago, but now that I know that there isn’t exactly a love connection going on here, I’m perfectly happy to stay and eat my hummus.
And when Monica sees that I’m not going back to my room, she glares at me, pivots back to Travis, and puts on a big fake smile. “Well, the bike lessons might be contractually obligated, but that doesn’t mean we have to be all business.”
She cocks her head to the side, twirls her finger around a lock of hair, and pushes her chest out. “We could keep hanging out, if you want.”
Travis laughs. “Thanks, but I’m going to be busy. You’re not the only one getting a bike lesson tonight.”
Monica and I both give Travis confused looks. “When Laney heard I was giving lessons, she asked if I could give her a couple, and I said sure. And it just so happens, that her first lesson starts…right now. Ready to go, sis?”
Travis raises his eyebrows, trying to get me to play along.
“Oh. Yeah! Absolutely. Let’s go.” I walk right past Monica, take Travis’ hand, and head towards the front door. From behind me, I can hear Monica starting to object, but before she can say anything, we’re out the door and heading for the half-pipe in the backyard.
She follows us out the entire way, and I literally have to get on the bike before she finally gets the message and leaves. She waves goodbye to Travis, looks at me like she wants to kill me, and heads out to her car.
I don’t realize how loud my huge sigh of relief is until Travis turns around and grins at me. “Happy she’s gone?”
Uh oh. “Uh…yeah, aren’t you?”
Travis shrugs. “Yeah, but you don’t have to give her fucking bike lessons, and you sound happier than I do.”
His blue eyes shine with a mixture of amusement, accusation, and a little bit of something else. I start to squirm a little bit on the back of Travis’ bike.
“Well, I mean…” For some reason, instead of changing the subject, I blurt out the truth. “I was pretty sure you were going to take her up to your room and fuck her.”
The corners of Travis’ mouth turn up ever so slightly. “Yeah? And you wouldn’t like that?”
“Of course not. I’d have to listen to every little…”
I look into Travis’ eyes, and suddenly I can’t find the words to finish my sentence. He’s giving me the look again.
“And you’d just be lying there in bed, wishing it was you. I get it.”
My thighs press against the seat of the bike, and my fingers are starting to turn white from gripping the handlebars.
He’s just teasing me, right? Trying to get under my skin?
Or is he trying to get under my clothes? I let out a nervous laugh, my voice practically cracking. “I guess I walked right into that.”
But Travis doesn’t laugh it off. He just smiles, staring at me with those blue, blue eyes. I should be freaking out right now, but for some reason, I’m not. Well, actually, I am freaking out, but not in the way I should be.
I’m freaking out like Tori said I would. I’ve been trying to drill it into my head that Travis is my stepbrother, a member of my family…but part of me still thinks of him as Travis Carter, the ridiculously hot guy that I’d never actually run into.
And I’m starting to worry that that part of me is about to get me into serious trouble.
Travis breaks the silence. “You know, you can get off the bike if you want. Monica isn’t here anymore. Unless, you know, you actually want me to teach you how to fucking ride?”
Oh God, why’d he have to phrase it like that?
“Maybe later,” I squeak, climbing off of the bike and heading back towards the house, with Travis following right behind me. Halfway to the house, I feel something wet tap my forehead.
I turn and face Travis. “We got rid of her just in time. It’s starting to rain.”
Travis smiles, speeding up a little so that he can walk next to me. And the closer he gets to me, the faster my heart beats.
Once we get back inside, it’s just going to be the two of us. Alone. All night.
And as much as I tried to deny my feelings to Tori…I don’t think my crush on Travis isn’t as dead and buried as I pretend it is.
“So…” I say, trying to make some conversation to drown out my thoughts, “Do you get that kind of thing a lot?”
“Girls trying to fuck me?”
There’s a little pulse of heat down between my legs as soon as Travis says the word “fuck.”
“No, not that…” I say, “Contractual obligations.”
Travis shakes his head. “All the time. It comes with the territory, I guess. When you’re as big as I am, everyone wants a piece of you.”
“Monica definitely did.”
Travis laughs. “Trust me, it gets so much worse than that.” As we walk back into the house, Travis starts telling me stories about all the stuff he has to put up with when he’s on tour. It’s surreal, having an actual conversation with someone that used to only live on TV screens and in my teenage fantasies, especially when he starts asking questions about me. My original plan was to shut myself in my room all night and try to forget about Travis, but somehow, we end up on one of the fancy leather couches in the living room, talking about everything from what it’s like to become famous to why I want to go to journalism school as the rain comes down outside.
I’m so caught up in talking to Travis that I don’t even realize that I’ve been moving closer and closer to him on the couch until I’m practically on top of him. When I do realize that I’m touching him, my mind acknowledges it, but I just can’t seem to find the will to move away. He’d do it if I wanted him to. And by it, I mean me. That much is obvious by the way his arm is draped around the back of the couch, fingers just barely touching my shoulder. I can tell from the way they press against my skin that they’re ready to do much more if I let them.
“You don’t have to be scared of me, you know. If it’s going to be you and me around here for a while, you might be able to be the one fucking person in my life who isn’t all about business.”
I’d like that. I’d like that a lot.
The Laney that was swearing up and down that Travis was my stepbrother and nothing more is totally gone now, and the starstruck, boy-crazy teenage girl that I’ve been repressing ever since graduation has completely taken over.
“Sounds good to me,” I say, looking up at Travis and leaning into his body like I’m trying to make sure it’s actually real.
Our eyes lock, and suddenly we aren’t talking anymore; we’re just looking at each other.
“Careful, Laney. Keep looking at me like that and a guy might get the wrong idea.”
But I don’t want to be careful. I want to feel his lips on mine.
Travis’ eyes dart down to my chest, and in response, I arch my back and push it out like I’m offering it to him. Like I want him to look at me. “Keep looking at you like what?”
“Like you want me to do this.” My heart does a backflip as Travis brings his hands up to the first button of my top, undoing it and revealing a little triangle of skin beneath my collarbone. Then, he opens up the one below it. Soon, his knuckles brush against my breasts and he reveals my bra. I can feel the tension building up in his hands as he reveals more and more of my body. Any second now, and he’s going to snap, tear the rest of my top off, and make me his. The point of no return.
I press my legs together, bite my lip, and wait for it to happen…but before it can, something changes. All of a sudden, I realize what I’m doing. And who I’m doing it with. And what could happen if anyone walked in on us right now. It’s like the mature, responsible me just broke down the door to my brain after getting locked out by the horny, irresponsible me.
And that means that instead of letting Travis undo any more of my buttons, I jump to the other side of the couch and pull my open top over my chest, breathing hard as I try to collect myself.
“Oh my God, Travis…we almost…” I just know my face is an embarrassing shade of pink right now, and I can see the tension in Travis’ body. He was really, really ready to go all the way, and I think he still is. It takes all the energy I can muster not to look down between his legs and see for myself if that’s true.
“You don’t want to?” He asks, eyebrows raised and eyes blazing.
“I…I mean…we can be friends. Really good friends. But we can’t just…”
“Fuck?” Travis whispers, his voice low, deep, and dangerous. As soon as he says it, an intense heat floods through my body, and my grip loosens on my top. “Why not?”
I bite my lip, and my fingers start to fall loose from my chest, but before things go any further, I snap out of it, jump off the couch, and practically sprint towards my room. Once I’m safely inside, I lean against the door, half expecting him to try and come in so he can finish what he started. If he tried, I’m not sure I wouldn’t let him do it.
Oh, God, I can still feel his fingers opening up my shirt. His eyes devouring my chest. Without even thinking about it, my hand moves down between my legs, searching for the relief that I don’t dare get from Travis.
Touching myself to my own stepbrother…does it get any dirtier than that?
If it does, I don’t know how. But what I do know is that after this, this little lapse in appropriate behavior, this can’t happen again. After this, I’m going to stuff these feelings under my bed with that stupid poster, and Travis and I are going to be friends.
Just friends. We’ll be normal stepsiblings, and that’s all.
Because if we become anything else, it could destroy us both.