Veronica
Goodnight Moon.
I'd turned the hardcover book over in my hands so many times that I was starting to make myself dizzy. I slid my fingers over the worn spots, picturing small hands clutching it. Opening to the front cover, I stared at the spot where large, sloppy letters spelled out Travis' name in a child's handwriting. A memory assaulted my senses.
"That was my favorite book as a kid," he'd said when I'd plucked the book off his bookshelf.
"Goodnight Moon, huh? Read it to me," I'd requested as I laid back on his bed.
His parents hadn't been home, which meant we were in the house alone together. He'd looked at me hungrily, like the last thing he wanted to be doing was reading. He'd humored me, though. Perched on the bottom edge of the bed, he'd read to me from the book. I'd nearly fallen asleep listening to his deep voice rolling over the words of the children's story.
My heart felt so full it could burst as I told him,"I liked it."
"Enough to read it to our own kids someday?" he'd teased.
"Most definitely."
Vinnie's footsteps echoed as he meandered into the room. Gabby had gotten most of the boxes moved out of the oversized room, which meant there was a lot of empty space left over.
"What are you still doing out here?" His brow furrowed as he studied me.
I'd gotten home from work in time to put Stella to bed and then I'd been sitting there on the couch ever since. My brother and sister-in-law both must have been able to tell something was up, because they'd kept their distance for most of the night.
I ignored his question and instead asked one of my own. "Do you have pictures of me and Stella in your office?"
"There's one of you that I put up on the wall, but I haven't put up any of Stella. Why?"
"Did you mention Stella when you saw Travis?"
Vinnie's jaw visibly tightened, his shoulders raising defensively. "I tried to tell you."
"I know." My nerves felt like they'd been rubbed raw. "But I need to know if you mentioned Stella."
"Of course not."
"Not even as a passing comment? Or by accident, maybe?"
"No, Ronnie. I know for a fact that I didn't mention Stella in front of him. I would never have done that to you." I shoved the book in his direction. His looked bewildered, but he took it from me.
"I think he knows," I said, my voice quivering.
"Huh?"
"Open it."
He turned to the first page, the same way I had when I'd first picked it up. I could tell the exact moment he realized what the inscription meant because his face reflected my own horror.
"Did you talk to him about this?"
I shook my head. "He didn't even give me the chance. When I got out of work the book was sitting there waiting for me. Travis was nowhere to be found."
I neglected to mention the part where it had been sitting in the passenger seat of my locked car. I hadn't forgotten the days when Travis and I had learned to pop open car locks for fun. Somehow, I didn't think Vinnie would appreciate that information.
"How could he know?"
"I have no idea," I groaned, throwing my hands up in exasperation.
"What should we do?" That was the great thing about Vinnie. He always thought of us as a team—a slightly bigger team since Gabby had appeared on the scene, but a team nonetheless. It was exactly why I'd ended up living with him to raise my daughter instead of with our parents.
Our parents weren't bad parents by any means, but they were much older than the average set. They hadn't meant to have me. I'd been a very late surprise, showing up well past when they'd expected to have children. They were retired now, with no real interest in helping to raise another kid—even if she was their only grandchild. I couldn't exactly blame them for that, which made Vinnie's help all the more valuable.
"We should get some sleep," I suggested. "I don't have the energy to deal with this tonight."
Vinnie stared at me worriedly. "I could schedule a meeting with him, talk to him for you. If you wanted me to."
I shook my head more intensely than before. "There's no use causing a fuss before we even know what we're dealing with. Maybe we're misreading this." The sour look on Vinnie's face told me he believed that about as much as I did.
"It's tomorrow's problem," I insisted.
Vinnie gave in, agreeing to put it to rest for the night. I imagined that had something to do with the dark circles I was sure had developed under my eyes.
I made my way to bed but slept fitfully. Every time I closed my eyes I was plagued by a combination of those old memories mixed with that strange feeling I'd had seeing Travis with his girlfriend. By the time morning came, I'd barely slept more than a few hours collectively.
"Mama?"
I rolled over, my tired eyes opening painfully to find Stella doing her best to climb up into the bed next to me.
"Here, baby," I said, reaching over to help pull her up.
She curled into my side with her blonde curls tickling me under my chin. A satisfied sigh escaped me. No matter how bad a night I'd had, nothing could ruin a moment like that.
As we lay there silently, I noted all the ways she looked like her father. They had the same blonde locks, though it was less obvious now that Travis had cut his short. Her wide brown eyes were like a carbon copy of his. Their noses, too, had the same curve along the bridge. I'd accused him when we were younger of having his nose broken in a fight, but now I knew that he hadn't been lying when he'd said it was genetic.
"Brea-fast?" Stella finally mumbled out.
"I'll bet if we ask really nicely that we can convince Aunt Gabby to make us some pancakes."
Stella shot up in the bed, somehow managing to find her balance well enough to stand all the way up despite the bounce of the mattress. She nodded so hard that she looked a little like a bobblehead. I held back my laughter.
I threw my legs over the side of the bed and stretched my arms. A heavy yawn graced my lips. I wasn't scheduled to work, at least. That meant I'd probably be able to sneak in a nap when Stella took hers. I'd barely gotten my feet up under me to stand when Stella launched herself into my arms. Luckily my reflexes were quick enough that I caught her just in time.
"Silly girl. You definitely didn't get any of that impulsiveness from me," I joked, even though she wasn't old enough to understand what I was saying.
I swung her around to my hip and made my way out of the room. Gabby had apparently managed to read my mind because we found her standing in front of the stove in the kitchen. She'd already cooked a stack of pancakes that were sitting on a plate on the counter. I could already smell the syrup waiting for us at the table. I tucked Stella into her high chair and went to work fixing her plate.
"Vinnie told me what happened last night." She didn't look up from flipping pancakes, which I was grateful for.
"Mhm."
"Are you feeling okay?"
"Just tired." I stabbed a kitchen knife into Stella's pancake with far more pressure than necessary.
"I could keep Stella today," Gabby offered. "Maybe you could go talk to him. Clear the air, you know?"
The knife fell from my hand, clattering to the counter. It startled Gabby, who turned to look at me for the first time since I'd walked into the kitchen.
"There's nothing to clear the air about." My voice was firm.
Gabby's eyes sought out Stella from across the marble kitchen island. "The two of you were only teenagers back then, Veronica. Maybe things would be different now. How will you know if you don't give him the chance?"
"Back off," I warned her, my voice cracking in the process.
I jerked the plate from the counter and stomped around the island to Stella's highchair. I set the pancake down gently, being careful not to startle her. I picked up the syrup from the table—Gabby had purchased an actual syrup dispenser sometime since the move—and smothered the pancake for her. I thanked my lucky stars that Gabby always bought the sugar-free kind because it meant Stella wouldn't be bouncing off the walls afterward. She was a pretty calm kid usually, but she wasn't immune to the effects of copious amounts of sugar.
"So, what do the two of you have planned for today?" Gabby smiled brightly but the tightness of her lips revealed how fake it actually was.
"I was thinking about taking Stella to try out that park near campus," I answered casually as I smothered my own plate of pancakes in syrup and pulled up a chair at the table near Stella. I considered inviting Gabby to join us, but I couldn't bring myself to willingly shackle myself to her for the day.
"That sounds great," she said in a soft voice.
She finished with the stove, turning it off and clearing away her mess. The whole time, Stella and I ate in silence. Both of us were watching her. I couldn't help comparing her to Laurel, the girlfriend I'd seen Travis with the day before. The two of them really were cut from the same cloth. I might have thought they were sisters if I saw them in the same room.
Stella was probably just staring at her because she wanted another pancake.
"I better get to work," Gabby announced. It didn't escape my notice that she hadn't eaten any of her own pancakes before she fled the room. Guilt ate at me, but I did my best to ignore it. It seemed like that was becoming a habit of mine.