LSU WAS EVERYTHING I’D hoped and dreamed it would be. Well, considering I’d only seen the drive onto campus and the outside of my dorm building, it was still picture perfect. The grounds were maintained, grass was green, and students were slowly filing in to be dropped off for their first semester. Excitement was bubbling inside of me, and so were my nerves. I had no idea what to expect, but I had a feeling it was going to be nothing like I’d conjured up in my head. There wouldn’t be college professors who became your best friends because they liked you so much. And there wouldn’t be the mean girls who picked you out because they simply didn’t like you and refused to let you sit at their lunch table.

Well… maybe.

I couldn’t imagine anything in college would be similar to high school life. We were adults now, doing adult things. Like making ourselves wake up for class. Not because our parents told us to, but because it was the responsible thing to do. We got jobs to help pay for the extra things we wanted, cause mom and dad weren’t here to hand you a twenty. This was the real world. Well, sort of. It was the part where our parents were still right next to us, ready to catch us while we learned to walk by ourselves. There was no hand holding, just wobbly steps as we figured out life outside of the homes we’d always known. It was the step before we were all but shoved out the door and told ‘now live’.

Being dumped off in a foreign place can be a scary thing. But I wasn’t afraid. I was ready to conquer and be who I was meant to become. Erm…whoever that may be. My senior year of high school wasn’t full of pep rallies, dances, and football games. I was focused on getting out of my little town as soon as I could. Which meant, keep my nose in the books, and staying away from the crowds. Both easy feats since I was never invited to anything.

I’d strategically picked this school based on distance from home. It was far enough where I had to stand on my own feet. I couldn’t race home whenever something made me uncomfortable and I had to seek out the comfort my parents offered. But close enough where I could drive home in less than a day. I had everything lined up. I was going to be on my own. I could leave Athens far behind and become someone else. I would no longer be the girl everyone had known since preschool.

And then my dream had been crushed.

After I’d been accepted, rumors flew around the school that someone I was desperate to get some distance from had received a full ride scholarship. My hopes of escaping were now filled with plans of how I could avoid him. My dream school wasn’t any more and I’d wanted to find somewhere else to attend. My mother was the only one that knew how I felt about him and, if it weren’t for her, I wouldn’t be standing here right now about to introduce myself to my new roommate. LSU was a huge campus, she’d said. The likelihood of running into him was slim. I liked small odds. So here I was.

A short girl with long, wavy brown, soft hair waved at me when I walked into my assigned room. “Hi I’m Aurora Dillon.”

“I’m Hadley?” It came out like a question.

I awkwardly reached my hand out to shake Aurora’s outstretched one. My new roommate, in my new dorm room, on my new campus. We both looked at each other expectantly, but I had no clue what to say. Do I start asking the basic questions like, what’s your favorite color? Do you like pizza? Tell me about your family. Things you’d ask your new best friend you’d just met five minutes prior at your first day of Kindergarten. It was so much easier back then.

Aurora looked down and shuffled her feet. First impression, she’s shy. Great, two shy people. This was going to be the pairing of the century.

“So…” I paused. “What do you think of everything so far?”

Long lashes fluttered upward and she gave me a genuine smile. “It seems nice. A little hot though.”

“Are you not from the south?”

“Oh no. I moved here from Montana. It doesn’t get as warm up there as it does here.”

She was right. Louisiana was a killer ten months out of the year. Some days the humidity was over a hundred percent. It was a killer on my wavy hair, but I couldn’t imagine living anywhere else. Nothing beat our people, our food, and that southern hospitality. I’d lived in Georgia my whole life, but I was certain Louisiana wouldn’t be any different.

“I’m assuming you’re from around here?”

I shook my head. My short hair prickled my cheeks. “A few states over.”

She nodded and then the same silence filtered in. If this was the way my semester living with her was going to go, it was going to be a blast. I don’t know what I’d imagined life with a roommate would be like, but this wasn’t it. I expected more hugging, laughing, ice cream eating, pajama parties, study groups, and stupid stories about college boys fawning all over us. Aurora didn’t seem like she was into any of that. She had light brown hair that definitely didn’t come from a box, freckles speckled across her alabaster skin, and legs that seemed to go for days for a short girl. I was already calling it. No beach days for this pasty chick.

Avoiding eye contact with the shy girl, I looked around the small room. Two twin beds, two dressers and two small desks took up most of the space. It was clear that Aurora had already claimed a part of the room so I gestured to my half of the room and said, “Well, I think I’m going to start unpacking.”

“Yeah, same.” She nodded.

I twisted toward my pile of things my dad had left. A lot of parents tended to stick around with their kids during their first day of dorm life, setting up their rooms, and taking them shopping for the things they’d forgotten. While both of my parents had come with me to bid me farewell for the next couple of months, I told them I wanted to do this on my own. My mom had argued with me and had told me it was her right of passage as a parent to help unpack in my first dorm. Dad had called her dramatic and told her to remove the claws and let me grow up. I’d smiled at him and mouthed thank you as he comforted my mother. She’d been a sobbing mess when he’d escorted her out to the car. To be honest, I was sad. I didn’t want to leave home, but I also didn’t want to stay there the rest of my life. Realizing I was growing up was a tough revelation. I constantly battled with myself between wanting to continue being a little girl, and having the protection of their ‘wings’ when I needed it, versus being an adult and having a whole new sense of freedom. Which also came with a new set of responsibilities.

As I opened a couple trunks and boxes, I looked at my stuff and sorted through each item, placing it strategically where I thought it would go best. I smiled when was finished I was glad that I went with dark oranges, greens, and reds. It seemed very grown up. I glanced over my shoulder at the other half of the room and almost cringed. Aurora was plugging in a purple lamp that had purple fur lining the edges of the shade, which matched the purple bedding on the twin sized mattress. I swallowed. While I loved my side and the sophisticated air about it, I envied the youngness of hers.

She caught me staring at what she was doing. “What do you think?”

I politely smiled. “I think it’s perfect.”

Aurora straightened her back with pride. “Thank you.”

I bit the inside of my cheek. Well, I certainly didn’t feel like sitting around trying to figure out what else we should talk about. Maybe if I got her out for some dinner, she would talk more. I’d had no idea that when I came here, I’d be fighting to get a person that was more shy than I was to talk.

“I’m starving, how about you?”

She exhaled. “Famished!”

“Want to grab something to eat? I saw a little burger shack just off campus. It smelled amazing.”

“Sure.”

We both slipped on some flip flops and headed out the door. The walk wasn’t very far. Had I had my car, I would have gladly driven purely for the sake of air conditioning. But I’d chosen to leave my vehicle at home. I wanted to experience my first year without certain luxuries. There was nowhere on campus I couldn’t walk to, and if I wanted to go anywhere else, I could call an Uber or take public transportation.

As we walked, I noticed that Aurora seemed to be a little winded. “You doing okay?”

She glanced at me out of the corner of her eye. “Is the air here always this thick?”

“I’m assuming so. Georgia has humidity, but this is a tad worse.” I felt terrible for asking her to walk with me when I could have gone alone and brought her back something. “No worries, you’ll be used to it in no time.” I had a feeling my reassurance was anything but comforting.

The Burger Shack was a bit further than I recalled, but, by the time we got there and stepped inside the cool air, neither one of us cared. I exhaled and the sweat that had accumulated on my neck felt extra cold under the fan air blowing on me. Aurora lifted her long, brown hair up and closed her eyes.

“This is the worst of summer, isn’t it?” she asked.

“Yes.” I smiled. “August is the worst of it.”

“Thank goodness,” she whispered.

The smell of cooking meat, and frying French fries assaulted my nose. My stomach growled ferociously. I missed lunch because my nerves had gotten the best of me. Looking at the super small menu, everything was pretty typical, and sounded amazing—burger, burger with cheese, bacon burger, mushroom burger, French fries, onion rings, and, of course, any topping you wanted to add. I was pretty simple. Cheeseburger with extra pickles and ketchup.

“You know what you want? I’m buying.”

Aurora shook her head. “It’s okay.”

“My treat.” I smiled at her.

“Okay, thank you,” she replied.

There was an older couple in front of us placing their order. Just before we were going to step up to the counter, I heard the door shut behind me and an obnoxious group of guys talking entirely too loud and disrupting my thoughts of food. I was annoyed by it. Well, that was until I looked at Aurora’s wide eyes gawking at the group behind us.

I snapped my fingers, giggling at her. “Earth to Aurora. Your jaw is on the floor.”

She snapped it shut and whispered, “They don’t grow them like that in Montana.”

I couldn’t help but smile at her. “What do they ‘grow’ them like where you’re from?” I’d briefly glanced behind me and saw several guys laughing it up, but I hadn’t bothered inspecting them closely enough to see if they were mouth dropping.

She shrugged, a pink hue coloring her cheeks. “I don’t know? Burly, or stocky.”

“Fat?”

She shot a look at me. “No, not fat. Have you ever heard of the saying cornbread fed? Where I lived, we didn’t have farm lands and corn fields, but the boys all went hunting, and fished for food and sport.”

I raised my brow. “You make it sound very rustic.”

Aurora shook her head, the blush deepening. “No, not like that.” She seemed flustered.

“Hey, I’m just giving you a hard time.” I smiled to make my words light.

“Next!” We both took a step up to the counter since it was our turn. I couldn’t wait to bite into a juicy burger after the long day I’d had. “What can I get for you girls?” an overweight woman wearing a Louisiana crawfish t-shirt asked impatiently.

I glanced at Aurora and indicated for her to order first. While she was speaking, I was practically drooling watching fries coming out of the deep fryer. Then my entire day came to a halt when I heard a deep, all too familiar voice say my name. “Hadley?”

Every synapse in my brain started rapid firing, and my heart kicked into a full gallop. No, this couldn’t be happening! Of all the times, all the places, and on this massive campus. I’d recognize that voice anywhere. I knew it inside and out like it had been etched in my DNA when I was a little girl. I squeezed my eyes shut as tight as I could, as if I could will the voice to disappear. I blamed my lack of food and sleep on my brain imagining things.

“Hadley.” The voice said it as a statement this time.

My feet felt like they were trapped in wet cement, sinking deeper until I couldn’t move. Definitely not my imagination. More like my past coming to taunt me.

“You gonna order, Honey? Or do you plan on standing there?” Apparently the woman, covered in stains, had had a day as well judging by her rude demeanor.

I had no clue what I was supposed to do, but my appetite was suddenly gone. It had taken off with the horse that had my heart. I sheepishly smiled at the woman and said, “I’m good, thank you.” I looked at Aurora, who was thoroughly confused and handed the teller a twenty-dollar bill.

As much as I didn’t want to, I needed to turn around. I could physically feel Wrigley’s presence looming behind me. Poor Aurora could only focus enough to hand the cashier the money without even looking at her. I turned, and looked up—the guy must’ve grown another five inches in the few short months since I’d seen him at graduation.

I sputtered. “H-hey, Wrigley…nice to see you.” I literally sounded like a chick from a cheesy b-movie.

His brow raised. “Nice to see ya, too,” he replied, looking at me strangely. “I didn’t know you were coming to LSU. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Did I need to? I thought your mom would’ve told you.”

“She didn’t but, I didn’t hear from you all summer.”.”

“I’ve been busy.”

“Doing?”

“Things.”

“Like?”

I felt my anger bristle at his questioning—I was getting the fifth degree. “Getting things ready for college.” I drew out the words in a sarcastic tone.

“Ahem.” I heard next to me. Aurora was looking expectantly at me.

I stared at her, unsure of what she wanted.

A hand shot out in front of me, and she took it. “Hi, I’m Wrigley Brooks,” he offered.

Oh, right. I should’ve introduced them. My bad. I guess my brain had taken a hike along with my appetite. Truly, I’m not a rude person, but I was definitely in a state of shock. Introductions weren’t at the forefront of issues at the moment, however. What was was why on earth, out of the hundreds of thousands of colleges the guy in front of me could have attended, he’d picked my school.

“I’m Aurora, Hadley’s roommate.” She fluttered her lashes and glanced at the group of boys behind him. They were all watching like Wrigley had sprouted two heads. Probably wondering why someone like him was talking to someone like me.

“What are you doing here?” I asked too sharply.

His head jerked back. “I go here.” He took a step forward. “Hadley, are you okay? You seem upset.”

My shoulders dropped. I was being rude and I didn’t like the way I was feeling. “I’m sorry. I’m just...I’m surprised to see you is all.”

“This is where my scholarship is. I got a full ride to attend here.”

I didn’t want to keep up the pretense of irritation. “That’s great. I had no idea.”

“Really? I would’ve thought maybe your mom would’ve mentioned it to you. Our parents ran into each other in the middle of the summer at a BBQ.”

“Nope, they didn’t say anything to me.”

His tone and demeanor changed and the playful Wrigley I’d grown up with came out. He grinned at me. “Well, regardless, I’m here, you’re here, we should get together and have lunch or something.”

That oddly sounded like him asking me on a date, except I knew better. I told myself to say something to pacify him so I could get out of here. “Sure, that would be fun.”

Aurora took a step forward to get our attention. “I’m eating, you’re eating, and I’m assuming you all came here to eat.” What in the hell was she doing? Did she really want us to...what...sit down and have a meal like one, big, happy family? She couldn’t stop looking at the guys Wrigley came in with. I realized that, maybe, my roommate wasn’t as shy as I’d thought she was.

Wrigley reached up and rubbed the back of his neck. He looked back at his group of friends and said, “We are, but we were just heading to a thing one of the guys is having at his apartment.”

The way he said ‘thing’ sounded like a party. The very sort of ‘thing’ I was never invited to, and I certainly wasn’t interested now. “Actually, I still have some unpacking to do, so we will have to catch up another time.”

“But you’re already fin—” Aurora tried to say before I shot around to glare at her. “I can help you when we get back to the room.” She corrected.

Wrigley looked between us skeptically.

“Chili cheese fries, and a plain hot dog; your order is up!” Saved by the grumpy woman at the window. I’d be sure to reward her with a decent tip the next time I came in. Aurora went to snag her food. When she came back, she looked at me, waiting for guidance on what I planned to do next. Good, at least she picked up on the fact that I wasn’t happy and would be ready to go.

I dug deep in the trenches of my soul to pull out a fake smile to flash at Wrigley. “It’s time for us to start heading back. It was nice seeing you.”

He chuckled. “Hadley, you’re always so formal. I have your number. I’ll text you to hang out sometime, okay?”

“Mhmm.” Grabbing Aurora by the wrist, I made my trek outside. I knew Wrigley was watching me leave. As we walked past the three guys, Aurora purposefully shifted so she would lightly bump into one of them. Her paper bag full of food, made a crunching sound.

“Oops, I’m sorry.” She said. “That was very clumsy of me.”

A guy with long, blond hair that went down to his chin, and a tan so dark, it made his blue eyes almost appear white said, “No worries.” He flashed her a grin with a mouth full of perfectly straight white teeth. Her smile grew so big it spanned across her small face. Her batting her lashes at him did me in.

I huffed. “Let’s go.” She walked backwards, maintaining eye contact with him. He winked before the door shut.

When we got outside, I flung my arms up at her. “What was that?”

“What was what?” She looked at me.

“You just bumped into that guy on purpose, then flirted with him.”

“Yeah, so?”

“So… I thought you were shy. Then you go whipping out this sex appeal that apparently you keep locked away like a secret weapon until you find someone worth letting it out on.”

She laughed. “Okay, first of all, I’m not shy, and I’ve never been shy. What on earth gave you that impression?”

I ran my fingers through my hair, frustrated with everything. I suppose her feet shuffling shouldn’t have been my sign that she was weird and emotionally unstable around attractive men. She was likely trying read me with her lack of conversation those first few hours in the room. I didn’t know what to think of this new found knowledge but she didn’t deserve my anger or confusion to be taken out on her. My assumptions were unfounded. My anger misplaced. Seeing Wrigley had landed me in territory I’d never wanted to be in again.

“It was a mistake on my part. Sorry for being so snippy.”

She started walking in the direction of our dorm. “What happened in there? Aren’t you excited that you know someone from home? Dear Lord, he was a cutie. What was his name again?”

Her enthusiasm made me grin. “Wrigley.”

“Sooo… you know Wrigley. And you went to school with Wrigley. And your parents know Wrigley.”

They were statements, not questions. I nodded. She took a few extra steps and twisted to walk backwards so she could see me as we spoke. Neither one of us were paying the least bit attention to the stifling heat. Or the fact that the sun was dropping lower in the sky and it would be dark in the next hour. I wasn’t sure what she wanted to know. Nor did I know what I wanted to tell her.

It wasn’t that I didn’t have goals. I did but the point of this school was to escape the stigma that was put on me at a young age in Athens, the one I lived with till I came here this morning. It had felt like a burden had been lifted from my shoulders. There was a glorious feeling behind reinventing yourself with strangers. If I told her that I was the nerd with very few friends, and I’d never had a boyfriend, would that dark cloud hang over me here? Would she tell people about me as the year progressed, and I would once again be left out of everything I really wanted to experience? Minimal information would probably be best. And if she questioned it further, I would either ignore it, or I would tell her I didn’t want to talk about it.

“I grew up few houses down from him. I’ve known him most of my life.”

Her bubbly attitude had her nearly bouncing on her toes. “Has he always been that hot?”

I shrugged. “I guess so.”

“Does he have a girlfriend? Guys like that always have girls back home.”

Oh, I’m certain that he had ‘girls’ back home. However, I didn’t think he had anyone serious. Last I’d heard, he’d broken up with Claire after graduation. She was captain of the cheerleading squad, and someone I hated more than anything. Not just because of what she did to me in elementary school, but because she was all around a mean person and didn’t associate with anyone outside of her circle.

“I don’t know, maybe?”

She turned her head to the side curiously. “You like him right?”

“Why on earth would you think that?” I tried to remain aloof.

“Hadley.” She said my name like my mother. “I may not know you all that well, but even a blind person could pick up on how you reacted to him.”

Was I really that obvious? It wasn’t like I actually liked Wrigley. It was just a crush sort of thing. The type of thing happens when a girl likes a guy for so long that it’s just automatic that you act like a complete idiot when they are around and can’t function like a normal human being. It’s how I’d act if I ever saw a unicorn in real life. Wrigley was like my mythological unicorn I was never going to experience in a relationship. I had my imagination and that was good enough.

“Blind people should probably stop trying to see things that aren’t there then. Wrigley was simply the kid down the street and that’s it.”

The side of her mouth tipped up in a smirk. “If you say so.”

I rolled my eyes and kept walking. I honestly had nothing else to say. This whole evening was a mess. My appetite was shot, my head was fuzzy; my new bed and some rest sounded like a great idea.

“Any chance you might want to hang out with him sometime so I can meet his friends?”

“No way.”

“Awe come on. Pretty please.”

I laughed. “Let’s just see how the semester goes. For all we know, we may end up hating each other and hanging out together would be nonexistent.”

“Wow,” she said, elbowing me. “You’re such a positive person.”

I laughed. “I’m a positive person, but I’m also a realist.”

“A real Negative Nancy.”

We both giggled and stepped into our building. I liked Aurora. I really did. She had a lightness to her that I’d not really found in anyone else before. That could have been because people had never really given me a chance to be known. I enjoyed the fact that she knew nothing of me and I knew nothing or her. We were like a batch of cookies being created from scratch. You mixed the sugar, and vanilla, crack the eggs and stir. We were just starting and I wanted to keep on a positive track. I wasn’t Hadley the nerd, or Hadley the loser, or Hadley that was ignored. I was simply Hadley and she seemed to like me.

In order for me to keep this spin, I’d have to drop the mindset that I needed to be skeptical of everyone I let close to me. She was my roommate and my new friend. I liked that word. She was my new college friend. The first of many, I hoped. This being away from home and nobody knowing me thing was going to be great. Even with the boy who used to live down the street on campus.