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Head On (Strength And Love) by S.R. Jones (14)


 

Isla

 

Ethan suggests a walk after breakfast, so we’re hiking over the fields, the dogs trotting by us. I know this is only supposed to be a short-term thing, but I keep getting flashes of how we might make some sort of life together, which is insane. I’m comfortable with him at moments like this, but then other times I feel all at sea and out of my depth. Plus, I don’t know him, not really, and he’s every kind of wrong for me.

On paper, he’s a terrible prospect for a partner. Or even a boyfriend. He’s a male prostitute. He was in the army, and clearly still has some issues from it if the punch bag routine is anything to go by. He’s already helping raise someone else’s kid, not that kids will ever be on my agenda.

And there’s my other reason to be cautious.

Another reason I never let myself think about something long term, with Ethan or anyone else.

The whole conversation I’d need to have at some point with any boyfriend is too horrible to contemplate. I don’t even like to think about it myself, let alone talk about it. The big C. Cancer.

Men tend to freak out over things like people getting serious cancer at the age I did, still a teenager. A lot of the women in my online support group have had guys leave them once they open up about it, as if it could be catching or something. I don’t want to be seen as damaged or fragile.

Those women in my support group might only be online friends for the most part, although three of us have met in person a few times, but I count them as my closest friends and confidants. No one else understands what it’s like to go through cancer at such an early age and have your whole future changed by it.

I feel Ethan’s eyes on me and glance over at him.

“You’re lost in thought,” he says.

I nod, and tell a partial truth. “Thinking how beautiful it is here, and how comfortable I feel with you.”

“Yeah, we get on well, don’t we…when we’re not at one another’s throats.” He laughs.

“We get on well when you’re not being a dick,” I parry.

He laughs louder and then he slings his arm around me and pulls me in close to him, planting a kiss on the top of my head. It’s familiar, such a ‘couple’ thing to do that it throws me completely.

Luckily the dogs start barking like crazy and Ethan stiffens and moves his arm, stopping me from having to have some sort of minor nervous breakdown over what I’m feeling. Ethan’s moved a few feet forward, scanning the horizon. I can’t see anything, but the dogs have all headed toward a hedgerow. They’re sniffing about, growling and barking. Ethan narrows his eyes, watching the greenery. “Stay here,” he growls, and takes off at a run toward the hedges.

The leaves rustle some more, and then a guy is running out of the hedges away from the dogs, and Ethan, across the field. “Hey.” Ethan shouts at the man, but he doesn’t stop. Sadie and Lucy soon give up the chase and come back toward me, but Cindy is barrelling down on the stranger, as is Ethan.

The man trips and goes cartwheeling forwards, his arms spinning out by his side. As he hits the ground Ethan whistles and Cindy stops giving chase immediately, turning back to go and trot by Ethan’s side. He reaches the man on the floor and squats down by him, but I can’t hear what they’re saying.

My phone starts ringing and I pull it out of my pocket, expecting to see Dad’s number, except it’s Dodgy Uncle Dave. I sigh, but I need to take it. I’m a bit worried about Dad. He’s sent me a couple of texts asking if I’m okay, and that’s it. Normally, he rings regularly when he’s abroad on business, but this time he hasn’t, and he knows I’m staying with a friend he’s never met, or heard of before. I expected him to be calling, wanting to talk to see what’s going on.

I jab the answer button, all the while keeping an eye on what’s happening with Ethan and the man.

“Hi Dave, how are you?”

He lets out a long breath. “I’ve been worried about you, Isla. I’ve been trying you at home. Your dad called when he was at the airport, told me you were home alone, so I thought I’d pop ‘round and see if you’re okay.”

Ugh. I bet he did. I try not to shudder. “I’m fine, Uncle Dave.” I put emphasis on the Uncle, hoping it will remind him how many times I sat on his knee as a little kid, and make him feel bad for being icky around me recently. There’s a long beat of silence.

“I think you should come and stay with me. Your dad called me, and he says you’re at some friend’s house, only he’s never met her.”

What the heck? Dad can call Dave but not me? I try to push the hurt to one side. He’s busy and Dave is his business partner. I’ve wondered a few times recently if there’s something going on with the business as they’ve been calling one another more than usual at night, and Dad has seemed a bit distant.

Ethan is heading back toward me now, the other guy limping off across the field in the opposite direction.

“I’m fine, Uncle Dave. She’s a good friend.” I hate lying, it’s not something I’ve done much of in my life, and when I do it tends to be lying by omission, like not telling people about the cancer.

“I still think you ought to come and stay with me.” He clears his throat. “Are you…are you okay? Is there…anything you want to tell me?”

I’m stumped for a moment, it’s almost as if he knows. I push the idea away immediately. “No. Why?”

He does this little cough again. “Well, erm…There’s been a bit of…trouble. Business stuff, but your dad’s a bit concerned.”

My blood runs cold. Holy hell! Maybe Ethan’s been right all along, and what happened was aimed at hurting me. I’ve honestly believed it to be all about him. Now, I’m scared. Ethan reaches me and his eyes search mine.

“I’ll be okay, honest. No one even knows where I am, so I’m probably safer here than at yours. If there’s a problem, then people know your Dad’s business partner. What exactly is going on?”

He clears his throat again, and it’s noticeable because he’s normally all confident bullshit. “It’s silly business stuff, but some…threats have been made. At least tell me where you are.”

Some gut instinct tells me not to. It’s not that I think Dave is behind what’s happened, but I don’t trust him. Never have. I’ll call Dad later and tell him, but not Dave.

“I’m out walking Sadie at the moment, and I don’t actually know the address.” I give a little laugh. “I’ll text you it when I get back and can ask Ann.”

“You’re not safe, two women alone. You should come and stay with me. It’s what your dad wants.”

I decide to tell a bit more of the truth. “We’re not alone. Her brother’s staying, and he’s ex SAS.”

There’s even more silence. “Okay. I’m not happy about it, and your dad won’t be either. Text me the address.”

He hangs up without even saying goodbye.

“Ex SAS, eh?” Ethan’s eyes are amused. “It’s actually ex-SBS.”

I don’t understand the difference so I shrug.

Ethan smiles at me. “SAS is the Special Air Service. We’re the Special Boat Service. I’m a sailor, not a soldier. We’re a bit like the SEALs, only better.” His smile turns into a full on, cocky grin, and I’m blinded by his beauty.

Right now, with the sun shining down on his dark hair, his deep blue eyes even bluer against the bright light and blue sky, and his gorgeous smile, he’s the most delicious thing I’ve ever seen.

His face grows serious as he regards me. “What was the phone call about?”

“My Dodgy Uncle Dave wants me to go stay with him. He says there’s some business trouble, and Dad’s worried about me. It seems your guess about this being about my dad may be correct.”

He nods, but doesn’t say anything for a moment. He indicates for us to head back toward the house, and we start walking down the hill.

“What happened with the guy in the bushes?” I try to make light of it, but I’m getting seriously creeped out.

He laughs. “Erm, turns out it’s a bit of a dogging and cottaging spot.”

I’ve no clue what he means and my expression must say as much. He clears his throat and for the first time since I’ve met him, he looks a bit embarrassed.

“It’s where people go and pretend they’re walking the dog, but they’re meeting for sex.”

I blink at him, twice. “They have sex. In the middle of a load of hedges?”

He shrugs. “Yeah. Not too happy it’s right on my doorstep. I think I’ll ask the guy who owns this land to cut the hedges right back. Sadie and Ann go walking around here, don’t want her coming across people doing that shit.”

I shudder at the thought. I mean, there must be all sorts of spiders and creepy crawlies in those hedges.

He looks at me and starts to laugh. “You’re such a prude.”

“And you’re such a ‘Not In My Backyard’ hypocrite.”

Touché.” He doffs a pretend cap and I grin. I’m hoping I can interest him in a bit more of the sexy stuff when we get back to the house.

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