CHAPTER NINETEEN
“What do we know about the local hospital?” Vale asked the next morning over breakfast, cradling his stomach nervously. To Jason’s pride and Urho’s satisfaction, it had grown greatly over the last week or two. He was now obviously quite pregnant at even a glance.
“For you or for him?” Urho asked, rubbing his bleary eyes.
It’d been a long night. After Xan had fallen asleep, Urho had gotten out of bed, dressed, and left the main house to pace the hallway of the detached wing. He’d listened for Janus’s cough, monitoring it lest it grew much worse, and tried very hard not to overhear the quiet words Caleb shared with him.
But he hadn’t been able to miss everything.
Like one exchange that had troubled him all morning:
“Promise that you’ll forgive me,” Janus begged during a brief period of consciousness. “Promise, Caleb.”
“I do forgive you, Janus. I promise. Now be quiet and rest.”
“I love you. It’s always been you.”
Caleb released a choked sound.
“All the rest were…” Janus coughed violently.
“Shh. Rest. Sleep. Heal.”
“They weren’t you. None of them were you, Caleb.”
“Janus…”
“Tell me you love me too.”
“I did care about you once—”
Janus cried, “Can’t you even lie to a man on his death bed?”
“You’re not dying,” Caleb whispered furiously. “Now shut your mouth and sleep.”
Medicine had been delivered to the house from the pharmacy first thing in the morning, and Janus was resting more easily now. Well enough that Urho didn’t mind leaving him to shower again, wipe down with the antiseptic lotion, and then eat breakfast with his very worried alpha-shaped omega and their nervous friends.
Caleb had refused to leave Janus. He’d declared that Ren would bring a plate for him when he brought the ginger broth Urho had prescribed for Janus. Urho had agreed to this only if Caleb promised to also drink the lemon, pepper, and ginger tea, and to wash up regularly, coating his hands with the antiseptic lotion.
Xan picked at his food, pushing it around the plate, his mind clearly elsewhere. Urho wondered if Xan had gotten through to his parents this morning. Xan had been holed up in his office until breakfast, as far as Urho knew, while he’d been so busy dealing with the patient and handling the hygiene orders for the servants.
“Are you listening?” Jason asked gently.
Urho blinked at him. “I’m sorry?”
“Never mind. You look exhausted.” Jason went back to his breakfast, always able to pack away more food than Urho could manage in a full day.
Xan sat upright, tense, and radiating silent anxiety. Xan didn’t meet his gaze, still focused on shoving around his eggs. Urho took a long swallow of his coffee, smiled at Jason, and said, “Forgive me. I’m tired. But please, ask the question again?”
“I’d wondered if you’d spoken with the local hospital and whether they had a place for Janus there. Obviously we want you to deliver the baby, not a stranger at the hospital.”
“Jason would lose his mind,” Vale whispered, sipping his prescribed tea—the same that Urho was forcing down every gullet in the house—and looking quite pale with worry.
“Don’t fret,” Urho encouraged him. “It’s all going to be fine.”
Xan’s fork banged against his plate, but he said nothing.
“So the hospital will take him?” Jason asked.
“No.” Urho sighed. It would have been so much easier for him if they had, but he couldn’t fault their reasoning. “They’ve asked us to keep him here. He’s contagious and the hospital is small. They’d endanger their already weak patients bringing him in. So, with him in the detached wing and all of you drinking strengthening tea and practicing good hygiene, we should get along just fine with him here.” Urho hoped that was true.
“Especially since you’re a doctor,” Xan said with a heavy sigh. He shoved away from the table, flopping back in his chair miserably. He stared up at the ceiling with a pinched brow.
“What are you going to do about your family?” Urho asked gently.
Jason stopped eating, and Vale went very still, both of them wearing expressions of concern.
“I spoke to my father’s assistant,” Xan snarled, obviously stung that his father hadn’t come to the phone to talk with him directly. But if his pater really was sick, then it was unlikely Doxan Heelies would leave his Érosgápe for any reason. Even to talk with his only alpha son. “He says Ray has taken a turn for the worse and Pater is…” His voice gave out on him, and he sat forward enough to take a sip of his water. Then he simply shook his head and said no more.
“You should go to them,” Jason urged, his blue eyes wide and earnest. “You were always your pater’s favorite. If he’s that sick, you shouldn’t risk remaining estranged.”
Xan swallowed spasmodically and his voice sounded tight. “Father ordered me to stay away.”
“Your father is an asshole—and worse, he’s wrong,” Jason spat. “He’s kept you from your pater this entire year and for what? Because he’s always been jealous of you, that’s why.”
“No…” Xan flushed red, and Urho wanted to reach across the table to protect him from whatever he was about to confess. “It’s because of the rumors.”
“There have always been rumors,” Jason said, waving it all aside. “He’s jealous of how your pater adores you. Érosgápe can be unreasonably possessive even against their own children sometimes.”
Vale rubbed his stomach thoughtfully again, a frown marring his forehead.
“Don’t worry,” Jason said, placing a hand on Vale’s belly too. “I won’t be like that.”
“I hope not.”
Xan rolled his eyes and snapped, “Fine. Maybe my father is a jerk. Not everyone has perfect parents like yours, or a pater so accepting of perversions.”
Jason’s eyes gleamed smartly. “Your pater has never given a single wolf-goddamn about what you do in bed and you know it.” He pointed at Xan with his fork. “He caught us that time when I was staying at your house while my parents went to the beach alone. He pretended he saw nothing.”
Xan squirmed in his seat, his cheeks growing even redder. “Don’t talk about that!”
“We all know about you and Jason,” Vale said calmly. “You two don’t have to pretend it never happened. Urho and I used to fuck too. As everyone here is aware.”
Urho shot Vale a silencing glance as Xan scrubbed at his face. Vale rolled his eyes.
“Yes, let’s all stop pretending now,” Jason agreed, his jaw set in that stubborn way Urho was all too familiar with from Jason’s early days of courting Vale. “And let’s stop pretending that the reason you didn’t catch the first train this morning was because you want to respect your father’s wishes. The truth is, you’re scared to face him.”
Xan’s angry, hot eyes flashed at Jason as he clenched his fists. He opened and shut his mouth, like he was looking for the right retort, but his expression crumpled. He covered his face with his balled up fists, hiding. “Maybe I am. How many times have you confronted the possibility of losing everything?”
“Xan…” Jason said tenderly. “I didn’t mean… Look, you know what I’m saying is basically true.”
Urho suspected it was entirely true. After all, Jason knew Xan’s family well and interacted with his father and pater even more often than Xan did these days. He had every reason to have a good grip on the family dynamics.
Just then, Zephyr stalked into the dining room and sniffed the air delicately before turning around and marching right back out. Urho realized he hadn’t seen her in days. Xan probably envied her ability to disappear whenever things got uncomfortable for her. No doubt he’d love to crawl into a hidey-hole somewhere right about now.
But Jason was right—at least about Xan needing to go see his pater and brother. Fantasies of escape must be pushed aside. The all-too-real world demanded he step up into it.
“Pater always said that if Father found out or suspected the truth about me there’d be hell to pay for both of us,” Xan whispered from behind his fists. “And he was right. He gave us both hell to pay by keeping us apart this year.”
“So what? You’re a grown alpha now,” Jason said. The future father in him was easy to see in his determined face. “Take it from me—our parents think they know what’s best for us long after they no longer actually do.”
Xan stopped hiding. “What do you recommend then, oh Mighty One of Great Knowledge? Just show up on the doorstep and hope Joon lets me in?”
“Yes! Take charge of this situation and your life.” Jason was getting fired up now, and he leaned forward over his food, his eyes bright and his voice ringing with certainty. “Show up on their doorstep and demand to be let in. You’re Xan Heelies, Doxan’s heir and only alpha son. You have rights. For wolf-god’s sake, demand them!”
Xan swallowed again, but this time his chin came up. He met Urho’s gaze, and Urho nodded at him. Jason was correct. Xan had rights.
“Go see your pater,” Jason said more gently. “If he gets better, then no harm is done beyond enraging your father. Hey, you do that easily enough without even trying.” Jason’s voice went even softer, and yet the sobering possibility attached to his words surely dug into every heart at the table. “If your pater doesn’t get better, then you didn’t miss your chance.”
Vale rubbed his stomach and frowned down at it. Urho was familiar with that look from his years of dealing with pregnant omegas. Vale was no doubt wondering who, exactly, was growing in his body, and what grief this child might cause him in the future. Urho hated to break it to him, but there was no way to tell. It was part of life’s ever-evolving mystery.
His own father and pater, both religious and devout, would be horrified by what he did with and felt for Xan. He was no doubt far from the offspring they’d hoped for when he’d grown in his pater’s stomach. That was the way of life.
“You make it sound so easy,” Xan said, shoving his plate away. “I’d be risking Father’s wrath, which isn’t an easy thing to endure. Not only that, but I’d be risking losing my inheritance entirely. He’s threatened already to give it over to Janus. Look, I’ve been banned from visiting the city and specifically banned from coming to see pater and Ray.”
“Oh? Did he tell you himself today on the phone?” Vale asked quietly. “That you’ve been banned from these places and people?”
“No. He passed it through his assistant.”
Vale’s lips twitched into a devious smirk. “Obviously there’s been a misunderstanding. All you heard from the assistant was that your pater and Ray were very sick. You thought you were wanted in the city immediately.”
Xan’s lips quirked up. “Maybe, but then his assistant would never hear the end of it. I’d think more highly of myself it I did the way Jason advises. Chin up. Demanding my rights.” Then he laughed bitterly. “But let’s be honest. I’m Xan Heelies. Unmanned coward, so I’ll probably do it Vale’s way instead.”
“You’re brave,” Urho said gruffly. “The bravest one at this table.”
“I told you,” Vale whispered to Urho, his dark brow raised.
“So you did,” Urho conceded.
“Look,” Jason said, sighing heavily. “I know that you’re scared, but in the end your father isn’t going to have you arrested for unnatural inclinations. He might find a way to disinherit you without taking it before the Church and courts, but I doubt it. Those laws are pretty tight. Even if he does go that far, without proof or witnesses you wouldn’t be arrested.”
“Just outcast,” Xan said.
“Well, your life would be yours, won’t it? I’m perfectly happy living in Vale’s house on Oak Avenue, and we’re going to bring our baby home there. I want to raise him in that house where Vale grew up.”
Vale made a soft noise of surprise. “You do?”
Jason nodded. “That’s important to me.” He looked back to Xan. “You have this house in your own name, in the trust from you pater’s father. You could live here. Or if you can’t find a way to afford the upkeep, you could sell it and you and Caleb could live well enough on the proceeds. My father would give you a job. You’ve done such good work on the office here. You could help open a satellite facility for Sabel Industries too.”
“Your father would hire me? If I was known to be unmanned?”
“My father ignores rumors like that so long as the work gets done.” Jason tilted his head earnestly. “All I’m saying is that you aren’t without resources and friends. You could survive the loss of your family’s money. And maybe you’d even be happier without it, Xan. If you could live honestly.”
“And be true to who and how you love,” Vale murmured, giving Urho a significant look.
Urho felt suddenly tongue-tied. “And… Well, obviously no matter what happens with your father, I’d never let you go without. Never.”
Xan swallowed thickly. His eyes shone with love, and emotion swelled in Urho as well.
Urho cleared his throat. “That’s it. End of discussion. Xan needs to go. Come on. You need to pack your bags and catch the next train.”
Xan blinked at him in surprise. “You want me to leave?”
“No.” He hated the idea of Xan being away from him for even a night, and even more hated the idea of him heading into a household of sickness, but Xan needed to do this. He needed to see his pater and Ray, and he needed to stand up for himself in the family. It was the only way he’d ever be free. “But you need to go.”
Xan nodded and stood. His hands were still visibly shaking, and he licked his lips anxiously. “There’s so much to do here, though. I need to call Edes and let him know I’ll be gone. He’ll need to take over at the office here in town in my absence.”
“You can do that while I start packing for you,” Urho said. Xan glanced around the room, worry creasing his face. “Don’t fret about the house,” Urho added. “I’ll hold down the fort here. Me and Caleb.”
“And we’ll be happy to deal with any household issues that don’t involve direct contact with Janus,” Jason said. “Or I will. Vale will probably just stare at his stomach and hum the entire time you’re gone. But I can help keep the place going if Caleb is otherwise occupied.”
Urho glanced to Vale, who nodded absently. He was indeed staring down at his stomach. Urho almost laughed. Yes, Vale’s days would continue much the same until the babe arrived—a walk on the beach, a morning nap, a lunch on the veranda if the day was nice, another walk on the beach, another nap. Urho didn’t resent it in the least. Every omega deserved to feel safe and pampered during pregnancy. He would want the same for Caleb when the time came. He couldn’t wait to see the man round with Xan’s child.
Wolf-god, Caleb…
Urho didn’t know what to make of Xan’s omega’s devotion to Janus’s health or the conversation he’d overheard. He’d suspected Caleb did still harbor feelings of some kind for Janus, but the evidence of it stung him considering how awful Janus had been to Xan, so it must sting Xan as well.
Certainly Xan and Caleb weren’t lovers like other alpha-omega pairs, but they were family, and Xan loved Caleb deeply. And while it would be petty to harbor jealousy when Caleb was so generous with Xan’s feelings toward Urho, it was only natural that an alpha would feel proprietary urges toward his contracted omega.
Maybe if Urho had been given an opportunity to know Janus better, or Janus’s behavior when they did meet had let him like him more—or if Janus had never hurt Caleb and Xan in the past—then Urho might feel the man deserved Xan’s beautiful, kind omega’s devotion. As it was, he resented any feeling Caleb carried for Janus. Perhaps even more than Xan himself did.
Still, he was determined to let the feelings go. After Janus was recovered, they could deal with the situation then. Should Caleb want to leave Xan and go to Janus for good… Well, Xan would have to face that fact, and Urho would be there for him during the fallout.
Until such a point, Urho wouldn’t think on it further other than to feel proud that Caleb was such a loving, forgiving person, and so generous in his care of a sick man.
“I’ll go make a few calls,” Xan said. “Then I’ll leave on the afternoon train.”
With that settled, everyone went back to eating their breakfast. It wasn’t a cheerful party with everyone’s mind still obviously fixed on various worries and problems. When Jason’s plate was clean and Vale had been prodded into eating a few bites more, the two of them said they would retire to bed.
“You should take a nap as well before you go,” Urho said. “I’ll go check in on Janus. I’ll come join you later if I can.”
Xan nodded tiredly. “I’ll go make those calls.” He hesitated in the doorway, looking over his shoulder at them all. Urho’s heart ached in his chest. “Thank you,” Xan said softly. “For bullying me into the right thing.”
“We’re your friends. We want you to be happy,” Vale murmured.
“Go make your calls,” Urho said. “I’ll meet you upstairs in your room.”
Xan kept his shower short, too worried to enjoy lingering under the water for long. After he’d tugged on his silky, royal blue pajamas for the nap he’d promised Urho he’d take, he sat on his bed to brush his wet hair.
The sudden knock on the door made his pulse jump, and he called out for Urho to come in. But the head that popped through the door belonged to Caleb.
Dreadful. There was no other way to describe his appearance. He looked so pale in his white clothes. Gray smudges of worry darkened the fragile skin beneath his blue eyes. His chin-length blond hair was tousled and hung messily around his jawline.
“Hey,” Xan said softly. “C’mere.”
Caleb shut the door behind him and crept into the room as though ashamed and uncertain of his welcome.
When Xan stood and opened his arms wide, Caleb rushed into them with a soft sob. Xan kissed his hair and shushed him soothingly. They held each other for a long time before Caleb finally pulled free, wiping at his eyes. The dark smudges looked even darker.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“For what, love?” Xan asked, though of course he knew.
“For lying to you about my feelings for Janus,” Caleb whispered, his chin wobbling. “I do love him. But not in the deep way I love you, and not in any romantic way. I never have. But I care for him more than I wanted to admit before. There was a time I would have contracted with him if he’d only wanted me enough. The real me.”
“I know. You’ve already said.”
“But I also said I didn’t care for him any longer.”
“No, if I recall correctly, you said you didn’t want to be his omega.” Xan’s mouth went dry. “Was that a lie?”
Caleb shook his head as tears spilled down his cheeks. He looked at Xan imploringly. “No, I want to be your omega.”
Xan led him to the bed and they sat on the side of it together. “That works out well, then, because you are my omega.”
“I want to have a family with you.”
“You can. You will.” Xan took his hands. “It’s okay to care for more than one man. I do.” He wasn’t in love with Caleb and he could never be. Now he knew that for sure since he had fallen for Urho and loved him with his heart, soul, and body. But he and Caleb still shared a deep bond.
“I know.” Caleb pulled a hand free to wipe at his tears. “I didn’t realize how much I still cared about that rat bastard until last night. Seeing him so sick… My heart broke again. And the last day could only have been more painful if it was you in quarantine, suffering like that. I can feel death in that room, Xan. I feel it.”
“Urho says there’s every chance he’ll recover.”
Caleb nodded. “I know. He told me the same. But my heart doesn’t think he will, Xan. In my heart…” He shivered.
“Don’t be superstitious.”
Caleb’s eyes flashed with hurt. “I’m being honest. Some part of me knows, deep down, he won’t survive this.”
“Janus is strong. Young, like us. He’ll make it.”
“I wish I was as certain as you.”
Xan said nothing, because Caleb was as certain as he was. He just didn’t believe Janus would survive. “If he lives, what will you do?”
Caleb shook his head. “Nothing. This changes nothing.”
“How can you say that? You care for the man.”
“Not the way he wants me to care for him,” Caleb said with a sad smile. “Or, rather wanted me to care for him a long time ago. I have no idea what he wants now.”
Xan touched Caleb’s wet cheek. “But you said your heart is broken by him.”
“Friends can break your heart, too, Xan,” Caleb whispered, tears welling again. “Just as badly, maybe sometimes worse than a lover. Because with a lover, from what I understand, you’re aware that it might not work out from the beginning, aren’t you? Unless you’re Erosgapé. With a friend, though, you don’t guard your heart.”
Xan brushed Caleb’s hair off his cheek. “He seems like he was more than a friend to you.”
“He almost was. He was my first hope. And my first loss. My only heartbreak.” Caleb shrugged. “Everyone suffers through it at least once. In some form or another. Just because my heartbreak isn’t romantic, doesn’t mean it’s not real.”
“Don’t give up. He’ll live and then you can find out if he cares for you too.”
Caleb sighed in a fast rush and shook his head, tears forming in his eyes again. “You aren’t listening.” He chewed his lip. “I don’t feel attraction for him, or romantic love. I know it’s hard for you to understand because you’re so different from me in these ways. My heartbreak isn’t because I want him.”
“I know.” Or he tried to know. Intellectually he understood, but some part of him could never fully grasp these truths when Caleb described them.
“I want you as my alpha, my best friend, my family.”
“I know,” Xan said again.
“So please don’t say that about Janus again.”
Xan nodded.
“I don’t want him. But I don’t want him to die.” Then Caleb nuzzled Xan’s neck and whispered, “Alpha mine, I love you. You’re my future, the father of my children to come, and my choice.”
Xan kissed Caleb’s head again. “I love you too. And it’s all right to be sad that someone you cared for, a friend, an old hope, is so sick. I understand. Let me hold you.”
Caleb rested in Xan’s arms, breathing in his scent and letting Xan stroke his back. They cuddled together on the bed, taking comfort from the familiar scents and sounds of the other, the rise and fall of breath, their mutual steadfastness.
Eventually Xan murmured in Caleb’s ear, “You need to rest. Take a break from looking in on Janus.”
“Ren has taken over for the afternoon. I’ll return to him tonight.” Caleb nuzzled him again, scenting him for a long time. “No one makes me feel as safe as you do, Xan.”
Tears pricked Xan’s eyes, and he squeezed Caleb tight. “You’re my omega. I’m your alpha. Of course I make you feel safe.”
Caleb made Xan feel safe too. Their brand of love and friendship was just as Caleb had claimed—without boundaries.
Caleb turned to go, but he stopped with his pale hand on the doorknob. “Ren tells me you’re leaving for the city this afternoon.”
“I have to leave. Pater and Ray are very sick.”
“Yes, you should go.” Caleb nodded, looking a little lost.
“Urho will be here with you. But if you don’t want me to leave while Janus is so ill, I can stay.”
Caleb shook his head. “Go. I’ll be all right here.” He left solemnly.
Xan was still staring at the wood grain of the door when Urho opened it several minutes later. He pulled Xan up into his strong arms, and Xan sighed as he leaned into Urho’s strength. It was Xan’s duty to Caleb as his alpha and friend to be there for him, but the sensation of being held by his own alpha was comforting and right in a way Xan relished.
“I wish I could go with you,” Urho said urgently. “I don’t like the idea of you in the city by yourself, with your pater sick, and your father…” he trailed off. “Will you be all right?”
Xan unbuttoned Urho’s shirt and rubbed his cheek against Urho’s chest. “I don’t know. I’m scared. I don’t want to lose my pater or my brother. Or my cousin.” He leaned back and looked into Urho’s eyes. “How bad is Janus? Caleb said some pretty morbid things just now.”
“He’s right to be frightened for Janus. He doesn’t seem to be responding to the prescriptions. Most of the time, the initial dose provides a great deal of relief within just a few hours. That hasn’t been the case. He’s deteriorated even more.”
Xan chewed on his lower lip. “Caleb cares for him. He needs to live.”
“Caleb has feelings for him? Sexual feelings?”
If Xan wasn’t mistaken, he heard a strange thread of jealousy in Urho’s voice. “Not sexual feelings, not attraction—no. Deep friendship feelings. Old ones that he thought long scarred over, but are now broken open again.”
“Wolf-god’s blessings on our Caleb,” Urho murmured, wrapping his arms around Xan. “He has such a strong heart, and he doesn’t deserve to suffer through this.”
“So you agree with him?”
“Doctors have instincts.” Urho kissed Xan’s temple soothingly. “And, unfortunately, my instincts and Caleb’s align. I’ll do what I can for Janus, and the local hospital has agreed to continue to provide drips and medicines. Only time will tell.”
“I hope you’re both wrong.”
“I do too.” Urho ran his fingers into Xan’s damp, tumbled curls. “When you’re in the city, promise me one thing.”
Xan gazed up at him. “Anything.”
“No matter what happens, don’t go to him.”
“Go to who?” Xan’s mind scrambled in confusion. Pater? Ray? Father? He didn’t know to whom Urho was referring with this strange request.
“That monster Monhundy.”
Xan gasped in horror. “No. I’d never. Not now. Not since we…no.” His throat clogged with unexpected tears. It hurt to think Urho believed he would betray him like that.
“I want to be sure you won’t go to him.”
“You think I would? After all you’ve shown me?”
Urho studied his face carefully. Whatever he saw there must have reassured him because he drew Xan even closer, kissing his eyelids and nose, kissing his mouth and his temples, before scenting along his neck and nuzzling him gently. “I’m sorry. Forgive me. I cherish you, and the thought of you in pain, of what he did to you before… It terrifies me.”
“I don’t want that anymore. I never will again. I want you. I want to be your omega. Even if…” Xan sighed.
Urho frowned. “What?”
“Even if that makes me weak. My father—”
“To wolf’s own hell with your father and what he thinks. You’re my omega, and that makes you strong.”
Xan’s mouth went dry. “Show me how strong I can be. Make me take it. Now.” He licked his lips, staring at Urho’s mouth. “Make me yours, Urho.”
“Demanding little pup,” Urho muttered. He quickly stripped Xan of his pajama top before shoving his hands into his silky pajama pants and clenching his buttocks firmly. “Get these off,” he said, shoving them down.
Xan’s cock filled fast, his asshole already gripping and releasing as he imagined the burning rush of penetration and the sweetness of a punishing fuck. “Make it rough. Make me feel it. On the train, I want to tighten my hole and still feel where you’ve been.”
Urho growled, his exposed nipples peaking. “Finish what you started.” He indicated his belt buckle and then removed his shirt, tossing it onto a nearby chair.
Xan got to work, his heart ramping up in excitement and his fingers going shaky. He slipped the tongue of Urho’s belt through the buckle, shivering at the rasping slide through the loops as he tugged it off. He placed it carefully on the bed, an idea sparking inside his tumultuous mind. He turned back to Urho, getting his pants open and dropping to his knees as he tugged them down.
Urho kicked off his shoes and stepped out of his pants, indicating with a jerk of his chin that Xan should put them on the chair as well. Xan did so, never getting up off his knees. His cock pressed against his stomach, pre-come slipping down the sides already, his balls riding high and tight. He greedily pressed his face to Urho’s groin, scenting his musk. Urho’s dick was thick and engorged, rising up alongside Xan’s cheek as he nuzzled the rough hair at the base.
Urho gripped Xan’s hair and tugged his face away. He released Xan and sat on the bed, spreading his legs and ordering, “Get over here, omega. Mouth open. Tongue out.”
Xan did as he was told, knee-walking between Urho’s thighs, his mouth open and his thirsty tongue out, ready to catch the pearl of pre-come that swelled at Urho’s slit.
“No sucking,” Urho said. “Lick me.” He gripped Xan’s hair again and dragged him in. The sharp tug of pain went straight to Xan’s cock, a zing of excitement that left him panting as he buried his face in Urho’s crotch, licking greedily at his sac and taint, sliding his tongue up and down his shaft, greedy for the pre-come that slipped down the side in regular pulses.
Xan’s cock begged for attention, and he put one hand on it, not moving it, as he worked. Urho rubbed his head, alternately soothing and tugging roughly on his hair, making him hiss.
“That’s my sweet omega, eager to please.”
Xan groaned. He loved being called an omega. It completed him like a hole being filled, almost as satisfying as his ass being plugged with Urho’s cock. Still, he wanted more, something harder—something that would leave reminders to cherish in the city.
He pulled away, sitting on his heels and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. He met Urho’s eyes defiantly, a hint of challenge, and then reached for the belt he’d put on the bed. “I think you should remind your omega who’s in charge,” he whispered, letting the leather of the belt slip around his forearm, dragging cool and scary over his skin. “I might forget. In the city.” His breath came in short gasps. “So many handsome alphas. So many temptations.”
Urho’s nostrils flared. “Who does your hole belong to?”
Xan groaned and handed the belt to Urho. “Remind me.”
Urho gripped Xan’s chin. “You want this?”
Xan nodded and gulped.
“If you say for me to stop, I’ll stop.”
Xan shivered. He wouldn’t ask Urho to quit. He wanted this like air. Marks on his ass. Evidence of possession. Urho’s marks. Urho’s ownership of his body and soul. His father and inheritance be damned. This was his place—at Urho’s feet, licking his balls and whining to be fucked.
“Get over here.” Urho gripped the back of Xan’s neck, dragging him close again.
Nestled between Urho’s legs, with Urho’s hard cock pressed against his cheek, he breathed in the scent of Urho’s body. Urho bent low, kissed Xan’s hair, murmured his love, and then pulled him roughly up into position. He wrapped one of his own legs over both of Xan’s to hold him firmly in place and pushed Xan’s body across his thigh, torso on the mattress, face in the sheets.
“Remember, if you say stop, I’ll stop.”
“Just do it!” Xan urged, sweat popping out as he struggled slightly against Urho’s hold. “Maybe you’re not sure who I belong to.” He spoke with a bratty edge. “Maybe you don’t know if I’m—” The sound of the belt in the air shut Xan up fast. He sucked in a breath and then grunted in pain, biting down on the sheets as a slash of heat sliced over his ass. “Fuck!” he cried when he could breathe again.
Urho wasn’t joking around. He’d laid the belt down hard. Sweat popped out all over Xan’s body as he panted. All thoughts of anything in the city, or anything outside of the moment were driven from his head.
“Who does your hole belong to?” Urho muttered.
Out of the corner of his eye, Xan saw Urho’s arm raise again. He whimpered, the word “you” caught in his throat. He groaned, “Show me.”
Urho let the belt fly and Xan shuddered, his legs pushing against Urho’s as the pain ripped through him, so harsh it rattled him inside and out. Another slap of the belt came, and then another. Xan was sweating and begging and not sure what he wanted now.
“Who does your hole belong to?” Urho asked again, his voice grim and firm.
Xan’s voice shook as he rasped out, “Show me.”
The pain was rough but laced with gold. Xan dropped into it, opening up to a glowing, empty place that seemed brighter than the sun and infinite. He burned in it happily, surrendering to the twitching, sharp thud of the belt falling on him again and again. He melted into a hot puddle of tears, sweat, and saliva as control evaporated and he breathed between the strokes.
“Who does your hole belong to?” The question pierced the brilliant, hot place where Xan sobbed and breathed in ragged, rushing gasps.
“You,” Xan whimpered, his heart swelling with pride. “I belong to you. Your omega.”
“My omega,” Urho said, dropping the belt and rubbing both hands over Xan’s trembling flanks and down over his flaming ass cheeks. “When you sit on this delicious ass of yours, you’ll remember who you belong to—who you are. No matter what the world says, no matter what your father claims, you’re not weak. You’re strong. My omega is strong as wolf-god’s love and braver than wolf-god’s own apprentice.”
Xan wept softly into the bed, his body aching through and through. He let Urho pamper his ass, rubbing lotion and other creams into it. And then he crawled up the bed to collapse on his stomach, spreading his legs and inviting Urho in. “Fuck me,” Xan whimpered. “Use me. Make me your hole.”
“I’ll decide what to do with my omega’s hole,” Urho muttered, gently pushing Xan’s burning cheeks apart and leaning in to kiss and lick his most intimate spot.
Xan groaned, his body shaking as Urho’s tongue penetrated him. With each wet flick against the rim, followed by a deep press in, his legs trembled and his cock twitched. He grew unbearably aware of the thudding in his cock, still stiff and growing stiffer, pounding with the beat of his heart.
Urho pulled back before returning with oiled up fingers, pressing two inside immediately. Xan hissed at the slight burn, but then got up onto his knees to push back for more. “Hurry,” he whimpered. “I need it.”
Urho moaned and tapped Xan’s sore ass, making him clench and cry out. “Mouthy pup. Do you need to feel my hand?”
Xan groaned and nodded wildly. “Yes. Do it. Spank me.”
Urho slapped his ass twice, fucking in and out with his fingers as he did, and Xan shuddered all over, pain and pleasure rocking him. He almost came when Urho smacked his ass again just as his fingers pushed against Xan’s prostate.
Xan gripped his own nipples, pinching them firmly, trying to hold back and teetering on the edge. He didn’t want to come without Urho’s dick inside him.
“Please, Urho,” he begged. “Please.”
It was the magic word, just as he’d believed as a child, because Urho oiled up his cock and shoved the massive head into him, holding Xan’s hips steady as he forced it inside.
“Fuck!” Xan shouted, head tipping back, lost in the pleasure-pain and shuddering all over. The pressure on his prostate grew as Urho pushed unrelentingly deeper, his cockhead shoving over Xan’s gland, and then the fat shaft rubbing it with each inch inside.
“Mmm,” Urho murmured approvingly. “Open up. So tight around me. Look at your hole sucking me in. Such a good omega. My omega.”
Xan clenched the blankets and bore down, taking Urho as fully inside as possible until the scratchy crinkle of his pubic hair was pressed into Xan’s sore ass cheeks.
“You’re going to remember who you belong to,” Urho said, sliding out and then shoving in roughly. Xan jerked and spurted pre-come onto the bed, his cock jolted by the shock of pleasure. “You’re going to keep this hole just for me.”
Xan whimpered. “Always.”
“You’re going to remember what’s important, who’s important.”
“Yes.”
“This is important, Xan. This. Us.” He fucked him rough and steady, his hips pushing pain through Xan with every slap of body against body. “Fuck everything else,” he grunted. “You’re mine.”
Xan reveled in the words, the possessive fuck, and the way Urho held him firm to take every single inch with each thrust. His legs twitched and kicked in spasms as he rode the delicious and rough thrusts, and his asshole convulsed in pleasure that echoed all over his body in waves of bliss so intense that it left him crying out. His cock pulsed and spurted pre-come, and his heart pounded faster and faster, until he braced himself against the swell and push of oncoming climax.
He reached for his cock, gripping it as Urho fucked into him roughly. His vision whited out, his nipples tingled, and his balls drew up tight. His orgasm ripped through him, copious jets of alpha come streaking the bed, splattering his thighs, and slicking his stomach.
Behind him, Urho shouted his joy. He pressed in deep, his cock swelling and firing off loads of come into Xan’s aching ass. Urho kissed his shoulders madly, his whimpers of pleasure like little bits of soul that Xan could take in, swallow down. Urho’s cock shuddered deep inside, and the sensation triggered an echo of Xan’s climax, so that he quaked and came again too.
“Let me see,” Urho murmured when they had calmed down. He carefully withdrew from Xan’s body, and then spread his cheeks wide, looking for the sweet evidence of his pleasure leaking from Xan’s ass, as he always did these days. “That’s my good omega.” He swiped at the leaking come and rubbed it into the skin of Xan’s sore buttocks. “Anti-inflammatory properties,” he muttered. “It will help.”
Xan whimpered and let Urho turn him over. “Wow,” he whispered. “You know how to use that belt.”
Urho smiled lovingly. “You have tender skin. I wasn’t as rough as I could have been. I’d say that by tomorrow you won’t even have bruises. Maybe a little sensitivity is all.”
“It felt rough,” Xan said, a bit of embarrassment flaring that he’d cried so hard over what, it turned out, were soft blows.
“I know.” Urho kissed his mouth and settled in beside him, cuddling close. “And you’re strong enough to take more, but I didn’t want to leave you hurting on your trip. I don’t ever want to hurt you, Xan. Not like…”
“It would never be like that.” Xan turned to Urho urgently. “Because I love you. And…” He swallowed. He hadn’t ever said these words aloud, even though Urho had admitted to the feeling, yet somehow it felt like a bigger thing to own. “And you love me.”
“I do.” Urho scented Xan’s hair and neck. “You smell happy—like come and bliss. Like a little bit of pain enhances your pleasure.”
“Yes,” Xan gripped Urho’s face. “It does.”
“Because you’re brave and strong and mine,” Urho said, as if Xan’s love of intense sensations and determination to experience them were something he could own.
“I won’t forget.” Xan clenched his anus, relieved to feel the twinge that he knew would at least follow him into the next day even if the spanking didn’t.
“Nap now.”
“Or I could ride you,” Xan suggested, his cock jerking helplessly at the idea, but still not ready to return fully to life. Urho’s was also soft again, and a part of Xan was saddened by that, but relieved too.
Urho tucked Xan in next to him, keeping an arm around him. “Sleep. The time will come to leave for the train and I’ll have left you more worn out than ever.”
“You leave me full of you.” Xan squeezed his hole around the slip of come that still leaked out of him. “Full in my heart and my body. Strong in my soul.”
Urho kissed his hair. “I love you, my strong, brave man. Now sleep.”