I spend the whole of dinner silent, moving my food around the plate. Hunger is far from my mind as I think of what lies ahead.

“You’re awfully quiet. Are you all right?” Damien asks. I almost laugh at the question, but I catch myself and simply nod.

Once we’re back in the bedroom, he hands me the lingerie I’m expected to wear for the night.

As usual, he strips off his clothes and climbs into bed naked. I pick up the wine-red crotchless lace bodysuit and head to the bathroom to change, thinking about my plans for the night.

I stand by the double glass bowl sinks, turned away from the glass wall through which Damien is watching my every move. My gaze falls upon the stretchy material in my hands.

My stomach is churning, but I can’t back out of my plan. I gather a few shuddering breaths and walk back into the bedroom, the body suit hanging from a finger.

“You didn’t change.” The statement carries a concealed warning.

“No,” I whisper, and drop the piece of fragile lingerie to the floor. It falls on my bare right foot. I take a few shaky steps toward the bed, trying hard to ignore the small voice inside my head that mocks me.

What the hell do you know about seducing a man?

I’m about to agree with the voice. After all, I was a virgin not long ago. Then I remember the day I had sex with him. My body surprised me then, doing things I never knew it was capable of, even without experience. I only hope that tonight it won’t let me down.

I unclench my fists and lift my hands, taking my time removing the strapless mermaid chiffon dress I wore to dinner. My breath catches when it sweeps over the curves of my body and pools at my feet.

I lift my closed lids to look at Damien. He’s no longer lying against the pillows, but is propped up on an elbow, eyes hooded.

I block all thoughts from my mind and step out of my underwear. I’m standing naked in front of him. I start to lift the sheets but change my mind. Instead, I spread myself on top of the covers. I feel like a prostitute. Maybe I am—I’m about to trade my body for something I want.

He clears his throat. “You’re sleeping naked?”

“If you don’t mind.” Although I’m lying on my side with the front of my body turned toward him, I avert my gaze. I’m afraid to be burned by the fire in his eyes.

“I didn’t ask you to…” His voice is a rumble inside his throat.

“I know.”

“What are you doing?”

My blood pressure shoots up. “I thought—”

“That I might want to fuck you?” He reaches out his right hand and places it on my naked waist. His touch scalds me.

“Yes.” Please don’t let him see through me.

“Look at me,” he orders, and I do as told. As I expected, his eyes are boiling with desire. “Is this what you want—what you really want? Are you ready?”

He’s giving you a way out. Take it or leave it.

“Yes.” I chew the inside of my cheek. “I want you, Damien.”

“Good answer.” Before I can say anything else, he’s turned me onto my back and his mouth is covering mine, his tongue prying my lips apart. I unclench my teeth and let him in.

His naked body stretches out over mine, and he places a knee between my legs. A sudden wave of disgust at what I’m doing causes me to clench up.

He stops kissing me. “Are you okay?” His expression is tight. “Don’t play games with me, Ivy. Tell me you want to do this.”

Tears prick my eyes as I nod. I close them tight and unclench my muscles. It’s going to be fine. As disturbing as this is, I still do find his body attractive. I’ve felt him inside me before, and I loved every moment of it then.

“Relax, rosebud.” He kisses the side of my neck. “Let me remind you how good we are together.” He kisses his way down my body until he reaches my breasts. My left nipple hardens when he sucks it into his warm mouth. He sucks and nips my bud just enough to make me gasp and almost scream out with longing.

When he lifts his head a fraction, my nipple slides out of his mouth. “Did you like that, Ivy? Do you want me to own you completely?”

“Yes.” The word feels true on my tongue, and for a brief moment I’m ashamed with myself.

“Be a good girl and say the words. Say you want me to own you.”

“I want… I want you to own me.” I’m selling my soul to the devil, and there’s no guarantee I’ll get anything in exchange. But I’ve already crossed a line and my body refuses to let me turn back.

He rolls off me, a smile spreading across his face. “Get on your hands and knees.”

The idea of being taken from behind makes me wet. But before I obey his command, my eyes meet his. “Do you have—”

“Hands and knees now!” He gets off the bed, approaches an ornate dresser, and pulls out a drawer.

Once I see the string of condoms and hear him tearing one off, I roll to my stomach and pull myself up until I’m on all fours, my ass up in the air. My senses are spinning out of control as I wait.

It doesn’t take him long to return to the bed. I crane my head once and see his hard shaft—he’s wearing a condom.

He positions himself behind me and places a hand on the nape of my neck. Before I can brace myself for what’s to come, he parts my ass cheeks and pushes inside me.

The sudden thrust is so deep that it sends a bolt of pain into the walls of my belly. My gasp scratches my throat. I grasp the sheets, clutching on to them for support.

As he fills me and pounds into me with deep strokes, I feel like a virgin all over again. It’s as though the first time he fucked me, he was holding back, and now he’s giving me his all.

It takes a few thrusts for my muscles to relax, to adjust to his thick shaft and allow him smooth entry. With each thrust, he lets out a throaty, animalistic groan that splits the electric air around us and collides with my moans.

He slides one arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him, while the other finds my clit and pinches it, eliciting a cry. I hate what he’s doing and love it at the same time. Maybe I love it more than I hate it, but I’m not ready to admit that to myself.

“You’re mine now,” he murmurs into my hair. “You belong to me, every inch of you.” He doesn’t stop moving in and out of me as he cups my pussy hard. “This part of you is my favorite.”

An incoherent sound escapes my mouth as tears fill my eyes. My body jolts forward as his pace increases. An unwanted thread of pleasure twirls from my pussy to my abdomen. Closing my eyes tight, I pray he’ll let me come this time. I try to keep my strangled cries low so he doesn’t know how near to orgasm I am. I don’t want him to withdraw at the last second again.

“It’s okay, my angel. Come for me. Say my name.” One of his hands is around my neck now, exerting pressure on my throat. Fear courses through me. Will he strangle me? Will he kill me now that he’s gotten what he wants? I can’t breathe!

I lift a hand and try to pry his fingers away, but I’m unable to. Before I fall forward with only one arm to support me, I give up. I force myself to relax.

My mind calms enough for me to realize it’s not the pressure of his hand around my neck that’s cutting off my air supply, but my fear of death. His hand isn’t tight enough to hurt me. I squeeze my watery eyes tight and give in to him completely. He tears through me without mercy, his balls slapping my skin.

Pushed to the limits of desire, my muscles clench around his dick. With a groan, he lets go of my neck and both his hands find my hips. He drives into me harder and faster than before. An orgasm hits my body like a cannon ball and shoots through the entire length of my body. It’s a hurricane, ripping through me, robbing me of strength.

With a grunt, he withdraws completely, then slams into me again with a force that almost breaks me. Both of us are trembling now.

The bones inside my body melt. I can’t hold my position and fall onto the sheets. He falls right on top of me, his dick hitting a bull’s eye.

“Fuck, Ivy. Fuck.” The way he says my name when he comes almost makes me believe he really loves me, reminding me of what we could have had.

Afterward, I don’t move away from him. I want to, but I can’t seem to make myself. Being close to him gives me some twisted sense of security. I hate myself for it. How sick am I, to yearn for comfort in the arms of the man who’s hurt me so much? Can it be I’m just as sick as he is?

I came into this believing I was in control. I wanted to be the one with the power. Instead I gave him even more control over me. He owns me in every way now, just as he said he would.