Ava
Chapter 21
I knew I was acting like a coward, but I let myself wallow in self-pity. From the pacing back and forth, I’d made a visible wear mark on the carpet in my bedroom. I was being so stupid, letting myself get worked up over a man who clearly had other plans, and was only stringing me along, like a naive girl. This wasn’t me, someone who submitted to wallowing, but I didn’t have the courage to face him yet. Thankfully, Lucy and Miranda kept him at bay, each the eight times he came to see me in the last three days. My curiosity was directed to the outside of my room at what people were saying about the pity gatherings between Garrett and me. It was hard to miss, the connection we had, the way he looked at me; it made me cringe.
Sitting at my vanity, Miranda braided my hair while Lucy was going on about how some Lady Samantha was caught kissing a man in a closet, when knuckles rapped on my bedroom door. I rolled my eyes; it being the most familiar sound over the last few days, and the one that made my stomach twist from just the thought of him outside my door.
“Same answer,” I told Miranda as she handed Lucy the hairbrush. Looking in the mirror, I pinched my cheeks. My eyes were sunken from lack of sleep and my skin was pasty from shortage of sunlight.
“Lady Ava,” Miranda said. “A Lady Hara Cranfield is here to see you.”
Excitement leapt within me as I jumped from the chair.
“Send her in!” I clapped my hands.
Hara rounded the corner, her willowy arms extended in the air, and she smiled. “Oh Ava, darling!” She beamed. Running up to her, I embraced her in a hug. “I’ve missed you so!”
“I can’t believe it’s you!” I replied, squeezing her little frame. I moved her to arm’s length and stared at her. Standing at about my height, she still had her perfectly straight nose, cinnamon skin, and chestnut eyes. “You are so beautiful!”
She let out a small laugh. “Oh, my dear, you as well. But you still look fragile and pale. Should you be out of bed?” She looked over my shoulder at Miranda and Lucy.
“I feel much better, Hara. Don’t worry about me.” I linked her arm through mine, taking her to a sofa near the fireplace. “Tell me about you. I want to hear everything you’ve been doing.”
Hara placed her hand on mine. “Oh, Mama took me traveling for a year, and then we went back home for two months. Now we’re here, only because I wanted to see Garr. But it’s such a culture shock. Telliva is so outdated with their decorum, where everywhere else I’ve traveled is more light and free.”
I asked Lucy to bring us some wine before saying, “I would love to go with you the next time you go home.”
“Would you?” Hara exclaimed, happiness filling her eyes. “Mama would love to escort you, and I would adore teaching you Arunian music. They also have a fabulous shop full of ribbons, hair pins, and shoes. I visit it more than Mama would like.” She shifted in her seat, giving me a mischievous look. “Though, the attire would be something you’d need to get used to. The Arunan people show more skin.”
Touching her arm, I squeezed softly. “How scandalous. Now I can’t wait to go.”
Hara laughed. “You are still too funny. I’ll ask Garrett to plan the next trip and see when—”
“No,” I blurted, and Hara lifted a brow. “I mean...it would be more enjoyable with just us girls. We can go shopping all day long and spend time together—just us two.”
She smiled. “That would be more fun. I could teach you the dances as well.”
“I would enjoy that very much.” I nodded toward the window behind us. “I intend to travel once this madness has passed. I’ve missed out on so much.”
Hara placed a hand on my leg. “You have. And we’ll enjoy it together.” She paused for a moment. “Ava...you’ve been dodging my brother, haven’t you?”
I shifted in my seat, clenching a little bit of my dress. “Why would you say that?”
Lucy came in with two glasses and a bottle, placing them on my small coffee table. Thanking her, I was grateful to be able to do something with my hands.
“It’s just that…” Hara continued when Lucy left the room. “Well, what I am trying to say is...I’m speaking out of turn. I’m sorry.” She clutched her hands on her lap.
“Never apologize.” I swallowed, popping the cork of the wine bottle. “We used to tell each other everything.”
Hara’s eyes fell to the floor. “I wish none of this had happened; it used to keep me up most nights. I worried for your safety and almost died of fright when Garrett told me of your injury.”
I handed her one of the wine glasses. “Your brother was very helpful,” I deadpanned.
Hara smirked over her glass. “I think he was smitten with you then.”
My breathing slowed. I didn’t want to think about that. “Oh, I doubt that, silly. I was just a young girl.”
Hara sipped her wine, eyeing me for clues. When my face remained void of emotion, she went on, “Why wouldn’t he? You’re a beautiful woman, Ava.” I forced a chuckle, smacking her arm lightly as I took a large sip of wine. “What ails you then? You look pasty and thin.”
She nodded to my food tray that still held my untouched breakfast. “Are you eating?”
“I’ve eaten better than a queen here.”
Hara cocked her head to the side. “Then what is it?”
I weighed my options; keep lying about it, or just come out with it, so she’ll leave it be and I can move on with my life. If I told her to leave it be, she would.
I think.
Plus, I hadn’t talked to anyone about it and it was killing me not to be able to converse about it.
“I’m afraid I’ve become somewhat smitten with your brother.”
Hara’s eyes widened but looked as though she suspected it already. “That is marvelous! Now you’ll become my sister.”
I shook my head grimly, bringing my wine glass back up to my lips. “He is arranged to marry Sophia Chitwood.”
Hara furrowed her thin brows. “Marry? Who is—”
I waved my hand in the air. “I’m fine. She is some Lady who lives here. A daughter of a judge.”
“But he said George and himself were coming up with a plan to make sure he wasn’t going to be forced to marry. I believe he wants to marry you.”
“I have too much pride to fight for someone who is already engaged to another,” I avowed. “Plus, it’ll free me from being tied down again. I want to travel and see the world.”
“Garrett would never hold you back from doing that,” Hara objected, swirling the wine in her glass. I didn’t want to speak of him anymore, but I owed his sister this opportunity to get what she wanted out, so I could be done with it.
“It doesn’t matter now. I’m fine. I promise you.” I patted her lap. “I am so happy you came to see me.”
Hara nodded. “As am I, sweet Ava.” Placing her wine glass down, she stood. “I have some things I need to get to the bottom of. I’ll come back and visit soon.”
I rose to hug her, and she said nothing further, only giving me a small smile as she left the room. I wondered how much grief she was going to give Garrett.