Germans loved Trouble. We’d drawn in big crowds in Ireland and Italy, and an even bigger one in England, but the number of people in Germany far surpassed anything I’d ever experienced in the U.S. Back home, bands played in big venues where people sat in seats and there was a limited amount of space. Here, Trouble was playing a whole city. The “stage” was set up in the center of a town square that spilled over into a huge park. By the time the show was ready to start, it was standing room only and you couldn’t see even a hint of the grass they were all trampling.

“How do you even sell tickets to a thing like this?” I wondered aloud at Celeste as we sat “backstage.” They had erected tents on either side of the staging area and the stage itself was covered with an awning, in case of rain. Rob paced, prowling back and forth, a water bottle in his hand. He was like this before every show. I was used to it.

“Well, they did put up fences,” she said, looking up from her Blackberry. “But I heard they busted through them earlier today.”

“It was like this the first time we were here,” Tyler piped up. He was sitting with his back to a post playing Flappy Bird on his phone, waiting for the roadies to clear the set after the opening act. I had tried it once and had given up after a few minutes. It was impossible, but it kept Tyler’s mind busy, which was what he needed before a show, or he got hyper. “Do you remember, Rob?”

“Huh?” Rob stopped at the sound of his name.

“The year we opened for U2,” Tyler reminded him, not looking up from his game. “Remember? They broke through the fences. They were climbing the light posts.”

“Yeah.” A hint of a smile appeared on Rob’s lips. “That was our first album. We were the opening act.”

“I saw that show!” I exclaimed. “Not in Germany. I saw it in the U.S. Katie’s dad got us tickets to see U2. That was when we fell in love with Trouble.”

“Who would have thought, huh?” Tyler did look up from his game then, a smile spreading across his face. I knew he was thinking about Katie—I’d talked to her and knew the two of them were talking again. And according to Celeste, Tyler had curbed his wayward ways to monk standards. No drugs, no girls, not even any alcohol. And he was talking to Katie every night, which made Katie cautiously happy, as far as I could tell from four thousand miles away.

“Yeah, what are the odds?” Rob smiled down at me, reaching for my hand. I let him pull me in close, slipping my arms around his neck as he dipped his head to kiss me. “How’d I get so lucky?”

“We’ve sure had a lot of happy little accidents,” I whispered, nuzzling his neck.

“Hey, get a room, would ya?” Nick, Trouble’s shaved bald, tattooed drummer, nudged by us.

Of course, he would catch us making out before the show. I tried to disengage but Rob held me fast, just making it worse as Jon, Trouble’s tall, long-haired keyboardist and Kenny, Trouble’s bass player, came around the corner and joined us. Since Rob had insisted I be backstage at every show, they’d started coming later and later. I was sure they all hated me, although we hadn’t said much more than “hi” to each other in passing since the tour started, and I couldn’t figure out why.

I’d tried, I really had. Celeste, with Tyler’s help, had even attempted, on a few occasions, to bring us all together. She’d organized several things—a walking tour in Ireland, the Vasa Museum in Sweden, even visiting Buckingham Palace in England, but it was no use. Nick, Kenny and Jon didn’t want to have anything to do with me, no matter how nice I was, no matter how much I went out of my way to ease their minds that I had no evil plans to steal Rob away from Trouble.

Tyler was the only one who would talk to me, aside from Rob and Celeste. The roadies were polite, but they kept their distance and seemed to stick together. They didn’t hang out with the band and Rob said it was, in part, because Tyler got into too much trouble when he hung out with them.

The crowd was so loud it was deafening. I accepted the earplugs Celeste handed over. She was passing them out to the whole band—they all wore them on stage. If they didn’t, they might, literally, go deaf. That’s how loud it was.

“Break a leg,” I whispered to Rob, kissing his cheek as the lights went dark on stage in preparation for Trouble’s entrance.

“Have a great show!” I called after Tyler as he handed his phone to Celeste and put his earplugs in. “Everyone have a great show!”

I didn’t know if they could hear me. None of the rest of the band acknowledged my existence, but that was nothing new.

“They hate me!” I said to Celeste. Well, yelled, really. She shrugged helplessly, putting her own earplugs in. I’d done the research and was glad the tour would be over before the baby could really hear very well. I didn’t want to take any chances.

Celeste sat back down but I couldn’t. The excitement of a show never got old, no matter how many times I saw them perform. I was still in love with their music, and especially with Rob. He and Tyler had always been the front men, the essence of the band. Their dynamic and banter fed the crowd, kept the energy spiraling higher and higher, song after song, as the sun set over the park and thousands of screaming fans.

Night fell, but the energy didn’t ebb. I hadn’t even noticed I was shivering until Celeste put a jacket over my shoulders. It was Rob’s leather and too big on me, but I welcomed it, smiling at her as she handed me a bottle of water. She oversaw keeping me hydrated when Rob wasn’t around. I laughed, unscrewing the cap and taking a long gulp. They were coming up on the end of their first set. They’d run backstage and wait for the crowd to go wild before running on for the encore.

I sang along to Can’t Break a Broken Heart, my favorite Trouble song since the very beginning—although if they recorded them, some of the songs Rob and I were writing now might change that. Sometimes I still couldn’t believe I was writing songs with Rob Burns for Trouble. This was my life now? Someone pinch me!

The song ended, the lights went dark—and now that it was dark outside, that made a dramatic difference. The band rushed off stage, grabbing water bottles, towels, wiping off sweat. Rob grabbed the water bottle from my hand, tipping it back and gulping until it was gone.

“That was mine!” I protested, laughing as he wiped the back of his neck with a towel, putting one damp, bare arm around my waist and pulling me in for a long, deep kiss that left me dizzy and breathless.

“Are you ready for your big debut?” He had to yell for me to hear him over the chanting crowd, not to mention the ear plugs.

I looked at him for a minute, sure I had misunderstood. My what?

It happened so fast I didn’t even have time to protest. They’d planned it, Rob and Tyler and Celeste—that was clear enough in hindsight, the way Tyler and Celeste ran interference with the rest of the band while the roadies set up two stools and ushered me and Rob out onto the stage. Before I knew what was going on, I had an acoustic guitar strapped around my neck and I was sitting on a stool facing Rob, who grinned as the lights went on overhead.

“We’re going to do something special for you tonight.” Rob said into the microphone. I had one in front of me too. That’s when I really saw the crowd. I mean, really saw them. There were so many people out there you couldn’t see the ground. It was just a sea of faces. “This is a brand-new song, something you’ll probably hear on our next album.”

The crowd went crazy at the prospect. I glanced down at the front row and saw girls clamoring to get up on the stage, security urging them to back away.

“Here to help me perform it is Sabrina Taylor.” Rob winked at me when I gaped at him, too stunned to do anything else. “Remember her name because I can guarantee you’ll hear it again.”

Then he started to play.

It was the duet we’d written, Light So Strong, the one we’d been playing and tweaking for weeks, but I’d forgotten all the words. I’d forgotten everything. If Rob hadn’t mentioned my name, I probably wouldn’t have remembered that either. He saw my panic and hooked his boot on one of the supports on my stool, pulling it closer and leaning in, away from the microphone.

“Play, Sabrina!”

I shook my head, staring out at the crowd like a deer in headlights. Was he insane? Play? Play what? I looked down at the guitar like I’d never seen one before.

“A-minor!” Rob called out and I looked at his hands moving on his guitar and suddenly muscle memory kicked in, thank God. The song started started on A-minor. My fingers knew what to do and I began to play along, following Rob around the intro one more time before he started to sing.

And then my world exploded.

I’d been on stage with him once before, the first night we met. I got up on stage and sang Janis Joplin, shaking in my boots—literally. But this, this was something else altogether. This was magic. Alchemy. Utter transformation.

Rob sang, looking at me:

I saw your light, your heart beat so bright, my heart blinded by your radiation—

When we pressed, sliding tight, matchbox friction, hearts alight, burning bright as one—

Chain reaction of love, core meltdown, self-fueling, fusing the chambers of our hearts—

No fallout disaster, no nuclear winter, consumed by the fires, love’s emergency shelter

One night, one life, one breath, one heart, one fire, one light, one love—

A light so strong, there can be no night

One night, one life, one breath, one heart, one love, one light, one love—

A light so bright, there can never be a night

I met his lyrics with mine, piggybacking, meeting his shining eyes under the hot spotlight. I sang to him, for him. The crowd was going wild, but I didn’t hear them, not really. Rob was my whole world.

Your stare pressed me to the wall, your heat undid my heart,

you lit a fire inside my soul—

You stole my sight, with a light so bright,

you cut right through my lies with your x-ray eyes—

Your love’s penetration filled my heart to completion, submission,

overflowing two into one—

I couldn’t lose myself, in our ecstasies, such deep mysteries,

found in the searchlight of our love

Then the chorus, our voices blending just like our bodies did when we had sex, fluid, perfect, so right it brought tears to my eyes.

One night, one life, one breath, one heart, one fire, one light, one love—

A light so strong, there can be no night

One night, one life, one breath, one heart, one love, one light, one love—

A light so bright, there can never be a night

When the song ended, Rob put his arm around my shoulders and we both took a bow as the lights went dark again. Then we were backstage again, both of us talking and laughing at once. I could barely catch my breath. And I couldn’t hear a thing he was saying because I still had earplugs in. I didn’t see the rest of the band, not even Tyler, so I knew they were done for the night. We had been the encore.

Celeste ushered us back to Rob’s trailer where we had waited between rehearsal and the actual show. We always waited out the crowds before even attempting to get back to the hotel.

I realized, as she shut the door behind us, I was still wearing Rob’s oversized jacket and had been, through the whole song. I hadn’t even paid attention to what I was wearing—a pair of yoga pants and a loose-fitting top, nothing special. My hair was pulled back and I couldn’t even remember if I’d put on make-up!

“You are so fucking amazing.” Rob’s lips moved but I heard him like I was underwater, laughing as I reached up to remove my earplugs.

“You planned that!” I cried, punching him on the arm as he pulled his earplugs out too, faking being hurt by my onslaught. “You jerk!”

“Oh, I know, making you live the dream in front of all those people,” he said, covering his head as I grabbed one of the pillows off the bed at threw it at him. “I’m such a mean, mean man.”

“You could have warned me!”

“Then you wouldn’t have done it.”

He was right. Damn him.

“But you loved it, didn’t you?” He ducked another punch to grab me around the waist and tackle me to the bed.

“Shut up!” I cried, but I was laughing as we rolled on the little twin mattress. The trailer was nice inside but not big enough for a double bed. 

“You did. You fucking loved it!” he exclaimed, kissing me hard and fast. “And they loved you!”

“They did?” I looked up at him, incredulous.

“Didn’t you hear them chanting?” He grinned. “They weren’t chanting Trouble, sweetheart, they were chanting Sa-bree-nah, Sa-bree-nah, Sa-bree-nah!”

“Nuh-uh.” It had all happened so fast. Had they really been chanting my name?

“I knew you’d love it.” His mouth made its way down my neck as he tugged his oversized jacket off my shoulders. “And doing it with you? It’s like fucking you right there on stage in front of all those people.”

I gasped when he shoved my t-shirt up, sliding a hand right under my bra to fondle my breast.

“Rob!” I moaned when he tweaked my nipples, sending hot sparks between my legs. But there was already a fire burning there, and he knew it.

“I know you felt it too,” he urged, sliding his hand under the elastic band of my yoga pants, slipping a finger into my sex. “You’re so fucking wet.”

“Yes,” I admitted with a throaty moan as he fingered me. I was already flying.

“You loved it,” he growled, dipping his head down to suck at my exposed nipple, making my hips buck up.

“Yes!” I cried, rocking with his movements, his calloused thumb strumming my clit. He played me better than any instrument he owned.

“You wanted more,” he insisted, yanking both pants and panties down my thighs.

“Oh fuck, yes,” I cried, as he undid his jeans and pulled out his cock.

“God, we were meant to do this,” he moaned as he rolled me to my side, entering me from behind, both of us still mostly dressed but our most urgent parts uncovered, just enough for us to meet like this, again and again.

“Yes!” I met him, every thrust, matching his intensity. There was no denying it, no denying him.

He had me nailed down, fucking literally, pounding into me so hard I thought we might fall off the bed. I don’t know how we didn’t. I didn’t know anything at all except the feel of him inside me, that hot, aching throb between my legs, and finally, the sweet release that always came with him, every nerve ending in my body on fire.

“Oh baby,” he groaned, thrusting one last, glorious time into my wetness, his mouth right against my ear. “It’s all for you. All of it.”

“Yessssss!” I arched with my own climax, taking every inch of him, every drop, milking his length with my own shuddering spasms of pleasure.

We laid there tangled up, I don’t know how long. Long enough for me to realize that, as good as we were together everywhere else, including in bed, when we were on stage together, we created something else, something bigger than both of us. I felt Rob’s hand move low, cradling my belly like he always did after sex now, checking on her like a good daddy.

We’d created this life together too, I thought, joyful tears coming to my eyes. He was right—we were meant to be together, to love together, to create together.

It was bigger than both of us.