SUMMER

The next day, no one teases us at breakfast, at least. Thank god. Everyone eats quietly, packs up the furs, and then we’re off walking again.

Today, the men walk near the front, the women in the middle, and those carrying sleds take up the rear. I’m pretty sure it’s because we’re slower than we were before, so the women are protected and can still set a slow pace. Harrec and Bek are at the front and keep an eye on how fast—or how slow—we walk and pace accordingly. Kate walks with me today, and she’s got her kitten with her, tucked into a chest-sling so she can keep it warm under her tunic. Rukhar and Gail walk near us, and I can’t help but notice that Rukhar watches Kate attentively. I’m guessing that if she gets tired of carrying Mr. Fluffypuff, he’ll be quick to volunteer, even though Gail’s holding his hand as we walk.

The kid’s been pretty quiet this morning, and I feel bad for the little guy. He’s only six years old, and this is his first time being away from mom and dad. Given all that’s happened, he has to be scared.

So I try to draw him out with conversation. “Your mom and dad go back and forth between the tribe and the ship, right? Do you make this trip a lot with your parents, Rukhar?”

He nods, nearly as silent as Warrek. What is it with men on this planet and not being chatty? Goodness. Gail shoots me a troubled look and gives a little shake of her head.

Right, mom and dad are probably topics we should avoid. Luckily, Kate’s front meows, drawing all of our attention.

She wriggles in her tunic, making a face. “I think Mr. Fluffypuff just peed on me.”

Rukhar gives a little laugh, the first one I’ve heard from him. “Still want a kitten after hearing that, Rukhar?” I ask, teasing.

He thinks for a moment. “Yes, but I would like Mama and Father back more.”

Oh jeez.

Gail shoots me a shut up look. Okay, so I’m failing with the kid. “Uh, so, um…”

“Rukhar,” a voice calls out from behind us. Warrek. Our little group pauses, and Warrek strides closer to us, pulling his ever-present sled. “I need assistance. Will you scout for me? Look for rocks in the path and move them aside so I do not run over them?”

Rukhar brightens, smiling at Warrek. He races to Warrek’s side and then begins to pick up the occasional small rock or stone that has been churned up by shifting snow, ice, or our snowshoes. There aren’t many, and they certainly aren’t big enough to stop someone as strong as Warrek. It seems an odd task until Warrek meets my gaze and he gives me another one of those slow, deliberate smiles, and I feel my body flushing all over.

Everything he does is with purpose, I remember. And he works with the kids back at home. Of course he’d know what would occupy a miserable child. It’s not yakking about his parents with me. It’s keeping him busy and making him feel useful.

“Catch up,” Gail calls to me, and I realize I’m lagging behind our little group. I jog forward—well, as best as I can—and fall back into place between Kate and Elly.

“I’m glad Warrek’s here,” I tell the others.

“I’ll bet,” Kate says slyly.

I ignore that. Or try to. “I mean that he knew just what to say to Rukhar to keep him busy. He’s good with kids. I think that’s important, don’t you? Not that I’m looking to have kids with him. Or that it’s something even on the table. I just think for a guy, it’s a good trait to have—patience and strength, along with a paternal instinct. Not that any of the other guys aren’t paternal, but it’s just different around him. I mean, maybe it’s not but… Oh god, I’m babbling again, aren’t I?”

“Mmmhmm,” Gail says.

“It’s okay,” Kate says. “At least we know the truth about why your eyebrows are gone. They weren’t burned off, they were licked off.”

Elly giggles.

“Oh, you be quiet,” I tell Kate, putting my mittened fingers to my brows. “My eyelashes are gone, too, and he didn’t lick those. That would be weird. I burned them off all right. My whole face would have been one big blister except for the fact that Warrek had some really great cream—”

“Oh lord!” Gail exclaims with a shake of her head.

“Not like that. Face cream. Oh my god, you girls are nasty.” When they all laugh, I bluster on. “It was a burn cream, you big dingdongs. He rubbed it on my face—”

“That’s what she said!” Kate howls.

I make a face as they all crack up. “Har de har har, yuck it up. You’re not the one who looks like a big weirdo with no eyebrows.”

Elly looks over at me and gives me a timid smile. “Still pretty.”

Aww. Count on Elly to make two words feel like a gift. I beam at her. “And that is why you’re now officially my favorite. These other chuckleheads can take a hike.” I mock-scowl at Kate and Gail.

“I thought that’s what we were doing.” Kate pulls her tunic away from her chest and wrinkles her nose. “Okay, he didn’t pee on me before, but he did now. I wonder if Harrec has a change of clothing. Harrec! Babe!” She jogs ahead, clutching at the kitten inside her tunic.

There’s a pause as we walk, and then Gail looks over at me. “All joking aside now, do we need to have a talk?”

“A talk? What about?” I give her a curious glance.

“Maybe not ‘a’ talk as much as ‘the’ talk. I think of you girls like my kids. I’m just trying to look out for you, and it’s clear that after last night, you and Warrek got a little cozy back at the fruit cave.”

I’m so mortified. “All we did was kiss, Gail! Jeez!”

“That’s fine. I don’t care if you do whatever you want. I just want to know if you’re prepared for things. Are you a virgin?”

This is definitely the most embarrassing conversation I’ve had since being kidnapped by aliens. Possibly the most embarrassing conversation ever. “Yes,” I tell her, words strangled. “Is it that obvious?”

“Maybe not to some. But I know what to look for. I was a mom, remember?” She smiles. “I’m not trying to make you uncomfortable, baby girl. It’s just that we’re on an alien planet and I’m wondering if we need to have a quick discussion about anatomy.”

Oh, shoot me now. “I know how sex works, Gail. I don’t think you can grow up with a TV or the internet and not know how it works.”

“That’s all well and good, but do you know sa-khui anatomy?”

Her emphasis reminds me of the surprising ridges I’d felt along Warrek’s tongue last night, and I can feel my cheeks growing hot. “Is it very different?”

“Girl, have you never paid attention at the heated spring? They have an extra…” She puts her finger up and wiggles it. “You know.” Her voice drops a little. “The spur.”

I look at her, startled. How did I not know this? Boy, I really must not have been paying attention when people were bathing. “Spur?”

“It’s a hard protrusion above the junk. Rubs you in all the right places, if you know what I mean.” She nods at Elly, who has an equally mortified look on her face. “Elly here knows what I mean.”

“Elly here’s as embarrassed as me right now,” I exclaim.

Poor Elly just chuckles, but she doesn’t disagree.

“Okay, well, I’m just warning you so you don’t scream your head off when you go exploring. Some of us like to sleep.” She winks at me. “I won’t give you the mom speech about getting pregnant, considering that he can’t make you pregnant unless there’s resonance.”

Resonance—like what Harrec and Kate just went through. I picture my tall, robust friend and try to imagine her pregnant like Harlow. It feels like everything’s happening so fast. “No resonance,” I say softly, and I don’t know if I’m happy or sad about that. I guess happy, but at the same time, I’d like to be the light of someone’s life.

I’d really, really like to be the light of Warrek’s life. Maybe that makes me a dork, but I don’t care.

“All right then,” Gail says, satisfied. “Just don’t let your mouth make promises that your heart can’t cash.”

“I thought you were done ‘mom-ing’ me.”

She gives me a sharp look. “Warrek is a good guy. He’s sweet, kind, and devoted. All of these men are. Do you ever see anyone cheating on their woman? Not going to work? Standing around and drinking all day long and then demanding his woman make him a sandwich? These are good men. I just don’t want you to play him, that’s all.”

“I wouldn’t play him. I don’t think I’d even know how,” I protest.

“I know,” Gail says. She pats my arm. “But I think you jump in without thinking from time to time, and that’s why I wanted to say something. It’s clear he likes you and you like him. But I think that these guys have a hard time with flirtation. To them, they go straight from holding hands and right to making a home together. There’s no in-between with them. And it’s a small tribe. You’re gonna have to see his ass every day after this. Make sure that there’s no bad blood between you.”

Bad blood? “I wouldn’t do that to him. I like him.”

She sighs. “I know, honey. And I don’t think you’re the type. I just worry over my girls. Look at Brooke and Taushen. Something happened while we were kidnapped. They stuck those two in the same cell, did you know that? Everyone else got separated, but those two, they slapped together. Something must have happened, because ever since, they’ve been acting up at each other.” Gail looks troubled. “I hope no one hurt her.”

“Brooke?” I echo, surprised. Out of all of us “new” humans, Brooke has always seemed the most self-assured, the most comfortable in her own skin. The thought of her in distress is a painful one. I knew she was a bit snippy post-rescue, but I thought she was just tired and anxious—who wouldn’t be after what they went through? “I hope it’s just leftover stress from the trauma of being kidnapped.”

“Me too,” Gail says.

“Miss Gail! Miss Gail! Look what I found!” Rukhar races up to us and holds out a shiny bit of something. “What is it?”

She pauses and peers, exclaiming over it and making a big deal. “Well, that has to be the prettiest stone I’ve ever seen, Rukhar. That’s amazing.”

“Can I keep it?” He looks so excited.

“Of course you can.” She smiles at him.

“I’m going to show it to Warrek,” he says, racing off.

Gail watches him go with a soft expression, and I wonder how she’s doing. She’s so busy trying to take care of all of us that no one’s stopped to see about her. “And you?” I ask. “How are you holding up?”

She shrugs. “I handle everything one day at a time. Today’s a good day. Tomorrow, we’ll see.” She gives me a serene look. “Don’t you worry about me. I’m a survivor. If you want to worry about anyone, worry about that little boy. He’s sweet, but my goodness, is he serious. I worry about that.”

I watch as Rukhar pauses, then races up to Kate’s side and shows her his new stone.

Gail chuckles. “I love that age. Everything’s so exciting and the world’s all new every time you turn around. It’s so fun.” Her laugh turns into a sigh. “It makes me miss my son. Sometimes I wish that Vaza and I could resonate. That I could be a parent again. I’m old, though. Isn’t meant to be.”

Elly’s silent, and I cast around for something to say. Something that will help ease the old sadness in Gail’s eyes. I don’t know anything about children, or death, or what to say that will make it better. So I focus on something else. “Vaza? You want to have kids with him? Really?”

“Don’t sound so shocked.”

“I’m not. Sorry if it came out that way. I just thought you two were together for fun, you know? I didn’t realize it was that serious.”

“These men don’t do anything but, remember?”

Elly gives a happy little sigh and nods agreement.

I think of Warrek and how he declared he was going to take me to his furs. Yeah, she’s probably not wrong about that. “It is a pretty different culture.”

“But a good one. Vaza’s a good man. He treats me better than anyone’s ever treated me before, and I was married for a long, long time.” Her smile grows distant, fond. “Back when I was younger, I thought it was normal to have a marriage where you argued a lot, where you constantly felt stressed and worried, and as long as he didn’t cheat on you or beat you, it was all good. But Vaza’s different. My husband was always the cleverest man in the room, and I grew to hate that after a while, you know? Especially when it’s turned against you. It’s nice to be with a guy that’s a little more easygoing, who wants to do nothing more than spoil me as best he can.”

Huh. I feel like I’ve learned more about Gail in the last three minutes than I have in the last three weeks. I think about what she’s said and how these people seem to take to a serious relationship right away. I think about Warrek…and I think about resonance and how it might mess up what could be a really good thing between us. “What would happen if you resonated to someone else, though? What would happen between you and Vaza?”

“Ain’t gonna happen, but it doesn’t mean I’d boot Vaza.” She shrugs her furs tighter around her shoulders. “When you love someone, you love them regardless of what a bug inside your body says. Sometimes I don’t think they grasp that here, because it’s easy to let the cootie decide. When you know, though, you know. Resonance would happen, but that doesn’t mean we couldn’t make something else work.” She casts me a sly look. “Not saying I wouldn’t be up for a little three-way.”

“Oh my god! Gail!” I’m shocked. She seems so motherly.

Elly just chuckles.

“Pfft. Don’t look at me like that, Summer.” Gail wiggles her eyebrows. “Here’s how I look at things. Losing my son and then being a slave made me realize that we’ve only got one life. I’m gonna live it to the fullest and enjoy myself and not gonna give a shit what others think. If that means I’ve got two men in my bed, if I’m happy and they’re happy, who gives a rat’s ass what anyone else thinks?”

Wise words.